Guys, I'm 26 no diploma, no job, never been with a girl, not even a kiss still live with my parents

Guys, I'm 26 no diploma, no job, never been with a girl, not even a kiss still live with my parents.

Any advice apart from an hero?

Ask your mom for sex. She might feel bad enough that you haven't fucked yet and might help you out. Make sure you ask for raw sex tho as condoms aren't fun

Get out of the fucking house, go for a walk and meet someone. that someone will introduce you to another someone and the cycle repeats itself. find a side hoe make shitty offspring and die.

>implying anyone in his family has ever had sex

yeah, no, don't think so buddy

join the army or air force ,women love a man in uniform. after the army you'll be buff and the army will pay for your uni. after the air force you'll have a pilots licence and hours in the air.

You know how babies are made, right?

How did you get so comfortable in that situation for so long? Are your parents controlling or do the spoil you?

Go to school, get a job, kiss your mom.

Don't be a nigger, get up, do lift, cut your awful hair, move your ass for any job from cleaning nigger shit to mcdonald, when u got money go to buy some cool clothes

Prostitutes.

Check backpage.com

Yeah, Santa visits and sprinkles mommy with stuff and then a year later mommy has to go to hospital.

Probably your best option right here OP, sounds like you need structure and discipline and really don't have much to live for anyway.

Thanks Chad

Fuck joining the army. Just learn a trade, make money, and be miserable like the rest of us

you should never speak to strangers user.

>implying they take people without highschool
>implying they want anything other than skilled workers
there's already more than a enough bullet fodder grunts enlisted user.

I was there one time. Here's the thing, life is what you personally do with it. No one holds you back but yourself. Suggestions of the military are valid. Your have structure, be forced to be disciplined and receive some training that might be useful once you get out. Veterans have access to a lot of opportunities after service.

The other thing I would suggest is baby steps towards a goal. Get a job in service industry, it's sucks and that will motivate you more. Attend community college at the same time. Buy a car. Stop doing things that only add to the problem (games, porn, over eating). Progress like that. Its never,ever to late to change direction in life.

So are you unhappy? Why?

>something something children in Africa

Is this OP? You don't have HS? You're fucked kid, go get your GED you fucking dipshit. It took me literally 6 combined hours of studying, travel time and taking the test to get mine.

Was Santa black and never returned for you, payed his child support or took care of you, user?

same.
im 19 dropped out at 14, now i stay home all day on the computer, no friends, no job.
i want to do something but i dont know where to start, i feel so behind others. i have no social skills or skills.

Change it. You're the only one who can.

go back to school then yo. community college, technical school, state school, anything man. OR try to find a job without an resume. That could start helping you find a reasonable schedule to follow by.

Go do some small task, like laundry or something, and use the gratifying feeling of completing the task as a boost, and apply for a shit job somewhere at a register or in food service. It will suck but you will learn how to work hard, and you will make some money. Then research a job and learn some skills by researching them online

No, Santa was white. But my daddy is never there when Santa sprinkles my mommy. It's like my daddy is buying the gifts and Santa can only give babies.

>Implying Santa can be another colour than black

Im autistic on paper and got laid. go out and drink get laid and then go back to your shitty life again. It aint worth doing something productive anyways

I was in similar situation user. I started working at a grocery as a bagger, eventually got trained as cashier. Shit tier job made me happy as it was progress. I started studying for GED, flirted with co-workers, ended up dating one for a bit, got GED and then quit. Work at better job now, still planning for college.

>The best part about rock bottom is that the only direction you can go is forward

Godspeed, Sup Forumstard.

Fuck off nigger

Whatever you do, start now. I am in the same state, but I am 36.

"You know who can really help with this problem? Sup Forums."

How about first you work on your character judgement

Join the Marines, spend more time outside doing shit, stop playing video games. Basically change everything about yourself because everything about you screams faggot.

Santa isn't real. Everybody knows the stork delivers babies. Grow up and learn some science you manchildren

And yet you worship Donald Trump. The man who's going to keep the minimum wage low, has a tax plan that amounts to trickle down economics and wants to cut social programs in favor of buildng a wall. I'd say suicide was the best option.

He was Turkish.

Iron man delivers babies? That's a kicker.

What's wrong with being 26 no diploma, no job, never been with a girl and still living with your parents?
I mean apart from being the utmost form of anti-conformism.
School = Debt
Job = the sale of freedom
Women = More debt + less freedom
House = More debt
Dude, live YOUR life. Don't worry about society because society doesn't worry about you.

i agree but where will you get money?