My name is Michael Weston. I used to be a spy

My name is Michael Weston. I used to be a spy.

>Standard operating procedure for shitposting is to insult their waifu

>one of the best ways to destroy a thread is to adopt a tripcode

Give me some everyday spy tips.

When you're a spy, you'll eventually have to shit in a dumpster. You've got a few options. You could squat on the edge, but then you'll probably fall in. You could get right inside, but then you'll smell like shit AND garbage. What you want to do is use the corner like a toilet seat. Try to find something clean to sit on, like a piece of cardboard. And when it comes to wiping, just remember: There's a reason the Arabs consider the left hand to be unclean.

A nice late night chuckle
Have a (You)

Was Michaelposting ever a thing?

I watched the show entirely and it is so comfy that I want to watch it again.

Why is he wearing a jacket that obviously doesn't fit him? Could they seriously not afford to get it tailored?

Its fucking gold if it wasnt

youre god damn right they couldnt

Why is Micheal in the CIA killing drug cartels?

Bunch of bitchylittle girls

Miyahmi

When you're at a friend's house and you need to take a fat ogre shit you can ask them to take a shower. They will most likely suspect that you're actually taking a shit, but real spies don't get caught. You take a shit in the shower instead of the toilet and use dental floss to chop it up and force it down the drain. Wet your hair and leave the bathroom.

My name is Michael Weston. I used to be a spy.

Oh and don't let your mom wipe for you if she scrunches, the french foriegn legion train their operatives to fold and reuse a moist towellete 17 times but once or twice will suffice.

One of the best ways to masturbate in public is to do it from the privacy of your car.

My name is Michael Weston. I used to be a spy.

such infuriating lips

>implying anyone watched this for reasons that weren't Bruce Campbell related

One of the best tricks when you go to a movie by yourself is to tell the girl in the ticket booth that your ""friend"" is running behind and that you'll be waiting for them in the theatre.

My name is Michael Weston and I used to be a spy.

>Come for the Bruce, stay for the Mikey

>mfw people in finland don't give a shit if you go alone

fi is best girl

To blend in with your environment you should adopt the mannerisms of the natives. When in Rome do as Romans do. When in Finland, do as the betas do.

My name is Michael Weston. I used to be a cuck.

>Give me some everyday spy tips.

If you have a roll of duct tape you are literally godlike and unstoppable.

I watched it mostly for him and to see what duct tape could do this week. Fiona got some good lines at times too, like her stress management technique she shared with that woman whose kid had been abducted.

"Imagine you're in a cool, clear spring. Now imagine you reach down and pick up a big rock, and bring it down on his head again and again and..."

Also, "Shall we shoot them?"

I kinda wish there was a spin-off show with Fiona and Colonel O'Neil from SG-1. Nothing but arguments over how much explosives are needed and bickering over whose fault it was that more/less shit got exploded than was originally planned.

You want to see how to really destroy a thread?
The FBI has no evidence to indict Hillary, she is going to win the presidency and actually make america great when she imposes common sense gun control and gives undocumented migrants asylum.

What do you mean it doesn't fit him?

How is he supposed to hide all his guns and shit under a tight tailored coat?

How nice is MIAMI IRL?

full of spics and fat smelly illegals who keep getting into your face
not nice

I hear from someone who lives there that the show depicted most places you'd go on a visit there pretty well.

Dunno whether that means it was a realistic depiction of what it's like to live there or not, but again super spies and conspiracies.

Been bingeing this series over the month, and I'm on the final season. Any other similar series you guys could reccomend? I dunno big conspiracies surrounding an intelligent cast in a modern setting Crime and law enforcement related. I watch blacklist and I've seen leverage already.

O'Neil is too old now sadly, but his humor and demeanor would fit it perfectly.

This is Michael Weston in HS

I like burn notice because there is no swearing and no sex

Yeah I live basically in miami. I mean they depicted it well by shooting on that certain location I guess? I dont hang out in the south beach area too much. Its so strange its like its own little island with its own little police force and tourists everywhere

Fringe

Dexter

Fuck this thread is fucking golden

Noted, thanks.

Eh, I dunno I might try it again.

watching s1 now. I do not like the s7. the series is nicely ended in s6 when everybody goes to prison.

S1 was god, but it went downhill as usually happens with TV shows

...

>watching Sicario
>this scene happens
>camera pauses
>Michael Weston starts giving tips on what to do when caught in a shootout

Interest waned when they stopped having "Clients"

Read it in his voice chuckle was had

If someone steals your yogurt, violently sodomize the person who did it with a crowbar

I'm Micheal Weston and I like yogurt

What the hell was up with him and his yogurt?

Sam axe is already loving sugar mommies in the pilot.

It's simple, straightforward, and easy, unlike every single other thing about his life

I really hated the sam axe parts, I just wanted more michael

>What do you do for these women?
>Wouldn't you like to know?

>Anything other than love and reverence for Bruce, First of His Chin

The only thing that stopped this show from being a 10/10 for me was how Fi was ex-ira. Same as sons of anarchy, what's with all these American shows glamorising terrorists?

It's called a Fundraiser. back in the 70's Blackops groups would raid drug deals for money and product to sell as way to get cash that couldn't be traced back to their employers are accountable to a budget. CIA outright began to run drugs after hearing this as a way to do things without the money being traced by Congressional oversight.

I watched it because a girl with a large ass watched it also. We watched together and i touched said large ass. Was nice. She left for college

IMO it fits the show better than her being an ex-Russian spy or an Arab or African terrorist chick. The America-Ireland thing was a real thing in the 80's-90's when Mike would have been a young operator/spy.

>feelin' up girl's phat ass
>feel some stubble
>it's Bruce Campbell's chin
>he winks at you

I understand it fits timeframes, but the ira were legit terrorists who've killed and blown up lots of innocent people. I'd be like if they made a show in a few years where one of the good guys helped plan 9/11

>be weston
>be up and coming super spy
>sent to ireland for some Patriot Games shit

>be fi
>be rebel little sister/daughter/cousin of IRA guys
>tag along to meetings, training etc
>natural hand at bombs and rifle shooting

>young idealistic spy and young rebellious girl meet
>fall in love
>...

She's not really shown to be a religious fanatic or a commie black widow type. She's more the stereotypical rebellious riot grrl, like the kid who wants to become a race car driver or fireman like her dad/uncle/brother.

That's a much more sympathetic and ''relatable'' character than an ex-commie or an ex-jihadist, given that the Ireland troubles can be likened in some tangental way to the American Civil War. Plus Americans always love anything Irish.

i might be overthinking it

>Every retard here saying Weston

He'd probably snap your necks while repeatedly screaming West-EN

Good show until it started taking itself too seriously (Season 6 or so)

Also Fiona was a terribly written character.

Sometimes the best time to spank the monkey is when others LEAST expect it. A good method of getting your rocks off is to always be prepared. A simple device that can play various video formats and a pair of headphones can provide hours of genital relief on the go. People say streaming is the future, but sometimes you gotta stay in the past if you don't want to get caught with your pants down.

You might want to give Person of Interest a shot.

>She's not really shown to be a religious fanatic or a commie black widow type. She's more the stereotypical rebellious riot grrl, like the kid who wants to become a race car driver or fireman like her dad/uncle/brother.
this. and I loved when she cucked Michael

I was always worried Fiona was going to die of malnourishment

Hated her. Worst part of the show

...

It's obviously just a skellington with some skin draped around it

>it's a fiona has zero body fat and a wicked case of sunburn episode

hot head

never listens

Spies often have to infiltrate groups on the internet without being suspected. Sticking to topics popular culture is an easy choice to fit in. Remember to post in large threads like /got/ general or the latest Marvel movie to cryptically communicate with other spies. Keep an eye out for specific terms you may be caught if you're labeled a "hothead" or "cuck". If the janny bans your IP, it's game over.

she really needs to get nude

>sunburn
delet this

ewww DELETE

i dont get why people do this man

they always end up looking the same, the stretched faces and narrow noses. it never fails to gross me out a lil

buimp

there are so man girls shown in shots of Miam. really nice place.

They're all skinny bitches who are anorexic and need to eat more

Lol ok fatass

Fi loves indeed to get attention. She flirts with other men and gauge the reaction form Michael.

>it's a Larry episode.

ghost dad?

I can understand that they have issues with their body but really yeah, it's always a lose-lose situation.
Look at what happened to Lil Kim.

show who do like then

It's standard operating procedure to wear a coat alittle bigger with a concealed handgun. That's a real thing... don't know if it waas intentional in this pic, though.

they have an expert on set they claim

>would raid drug deals
lel so naive, they were the ones making the deals with the mexican cartels like the guadalajara cartel to load private jets with tons of Escobar's cocaine that was on it's way to america and landing them on military bases along the border.
Those same planes returned to central america with weapons and money for the contras and the guadalajara cartel.

...

So you used to be a spy?
>Yeah man some real covert black ops shit, ya know?
Can you share with us some stories?
>That's classified
Then how do we even know you were actually a spy?
>you can't prove that I wasn't
Damn you're good.

She literally never wore a bra in the entire show.

We got Tricia Helfer, Daniel Jackson and FUCKING ASHUR in Burn Notice, who else am I missing for guest stars?

just finished southland and im looking for a new tv show, is this any good? each chapter has its own story or not? other tv show im watching is psych, so i dont want another case show if you understand what im saying

Burt Reynolds
Xena
The lady captain from Dark Matter
Amaro from SVU
A couple of guys from Oz
The Terminator from Terminator 3
Method Man
Onyx
The bad guy from Suits
The cop with the 45 from Blackhat
The bald 'russian' thug from the Limitless movie

most episodes have a case-of-the-week and a piece of the overarching plot happening. it's a running joke that they regularly have to do both at the same time.

Burned Spy meets up with Retired Military friend, gets back in touch with an old girlfriend, and reconnects with his family. Together they start doing jobs for clients while Michael tries to figure out why he got burned. Takes place in Miami and definitely makes Miami look beautiful.

Don't take it too seriously. It's a very fun show. Each episode is self contained but there's usually a narrative thread that ties the whole season together similar to how xfiles did theirs.

Clever, cheesy, and ultimately predictable but the great cast of characters really makes it work. Very easy to binge watch.

I would recommend at least giving it a few episodes. Maybe look up some popular episodes and check them out, it's pretty safe to jump around. at the cost of the overall narrative but it's really not that hard to follow

The black woman from The Wire