I will have a fight tomorrow

I will have a fight tomorrow...
any advice?

Yes.

Bring a gun

Hoof her in the front butt

Chokehold.

Doesn't matter if you get hit, just get behind the dude, hug his throat and lean back until his brain stops getting enough oxygen.

We need more information.

what do you want to know?

...

Who are you fighting
Why are you fighting
Why type of fight do you expect it to be
etc

Give us a rundown of what's going on here.

Tell us why. Also what kind of guy are you, skinny, fat, muscular? How is the guy?

Intimidate him with your katana and fedora

You really wanna know?

Hit first, right to the nose, and for the love of God make it count

Dont allow yourself to be slammed, follow through sith ounches dont just pinch him you need to drive your punch and make it hurt, targrt the ribs for an initial punch, great way to knock the air out of someone and make them falter and/or hesitate, if you can slam try it, but at all costs avoid being slammed

There is no honor in getting your ass kicked.
Sucker punch, fight dirty and use your keys (people tend to loose concentration on fighting when blood is pouring out of their face.)

soo I was texting a girl and he got super mad about it
I only saw him on a picture
im 6 foot tall and go to the gym sice one year

my thoughts exactly

I only have a big ax

Make sure you have a flamethrower

Ill start a threat tomorrow and tell you about the result

This is the only proper option next to not fighting to begin with.

Don't lose.

Don't surrender.

I wont

Alright, you are not a weakling, you already did 50% percent of the job.
If you really have to fight, try not to make it last.
> Don't be a pussy, aim for the stomach or the face.
> Go directly to it, just "run" straight to it
> Hit as hard as you can. The guy wont expect it and you will hurt him for sure.
> Now he wont have any idea wtf is going on, so just hit him a second time in the face/stomach
> he is down
> profit???

People are not used to fighting, so just be fast and hit hard. If you do it properly, any normal person will be down in a single punch.

Also, take this:

Win.

thanks

Try kick-twerking, this is how it works:
At first you move your ass to your opponent and start twerking. While doing this you say "uhh hu nigga, you like that, right? uhh yea, watch that booty twerk nigga" As soon as he drops his guard due to confusion / arrousal you kick as hard as you can into his balls.
When he drops on the ground twerk on him a little more and high-five with latisha yolanda angel diamond refurgus obama - the ghetto bitch that taught you everything you are today. She will also give you an honorary wig because now you're an official certified ghetto bitch. Continue to roll a 12 feet blunt and smoke that shit in one huff.
People everywhere start clapping with their buttcheeks. You do an farewell twerk on the now dead enemy and vanish into the sunset thowards your new home in bel air.

don't live in such a shithole that your only option is to solve problems with violence.

No one expects a headbutt. Now a proper headbutt must come right at the start of the fight for max surprise. Use the strongest part of your skull (kinda the top of the forehead whwre it transitions to the top of your head. Right on the curve) and ram it into their nose or bridge of their eyes.

Its crucial that you RAM it. Dont swing your head at them like a mace or something because A: thats not going to hurt them and B it will fuck up your neck. Plant one foot foreward, and lean your whole body into it keeping your neck firm and head straight

Protect your face, you only need one hand to attack. The very back of your forearm, the flat part right where it turns into elbow, is a very strong bone and can hit really hard if you twist your torso and make a swing with that elbow. Use that if the distance closes EVER. When you land a punch, you're trying to land the force on the first digit of your index, middle, and ring finger; putting force on your knuckles might break them. If your first punch is hard, it could scare them and throw them of their game. If an opening presents itself, a little shove to their chest or shoulder can throw them really of balance. If they do lose balance, you can make the fight dirty by throwing them, tripping them, or kicking. Sweep the leg, as they say. Hooks are mostly useless, they're hard to aim with no practice so it's hard to hit something that matters. Stick to jabs and elbows.
If it's a fight you're mad about, time slows down and things don't hurt as much. If you're calm, it will hurt but you'll perform better. Take a friend who can drive you to urgent care afterwards. Signs of a concussion include slurred speech, dizziness, nausea, eyes acting different, headache, blood from head orifice. Good luck.

niggers

thanks

Get a knife and stab the shit out of his bitch ass.

You mentioned you go to the gym. /fit/ just came up with a gym related home defense options not too long ago, maybe these will help?

Aim for the jaw, use the rest of your body to give extra power behind your punch.
If all else fails, Run as fast as you can.

lel

Don't listen to these retards who say you will break your knuckles if you punch the cunt.

throw a few punches now and figure out how to rotate your torso, shift your weight, and think about where your feet are. Losing balance is a terrible idea.

You always want to keep your face protected, don't throw hay makers, focus on good jabs from rotating your body, and don't hit him in the forehead or front of the face, go for the sides of his jaw.

Duck when he swings at you, and avoid turning your head away from the punch, your frontal bone is the thickest on your head.

Try to mix it up with punches where and when they land and come from.

Wear stretchy clothing, but not baggy.

Bring a mate or two to make it less likely you'll be jumped/gang raped by niggers.

you want your punch to hit with the front of your proximal phalanges, not your knuckles, if you can help it.


Google an ottoman slap, he really wont expect it and it's fucking great.

Even when the cops show up, man. You need to prove you're a man. Just fight the cops too.

First thought: Can't fuck with those punches
Second thought: Mike forgot he has a right hand
Third thought: Legs are planted, he's a boxer but still.
Here's how you beat young Mike Tyson.
Leg kick him with everything you have and circle left and back.
Front push kick with the left foot to the liver and circle left and back.
>repeat until he slows down
spinning backfist to his right temple, KO SON

Oh and the best place to punch on the torso is the very bottom of the false ribs, where your rib cage ends.

kek

thanks a lot

>armchair-street-fighter knows how to beat young mike tyson

>mike tyson wins then proceeds to fuck your mother with your severed ear still in his mouth

>go for the sides of his jaw.

Actually a lot of people have thousands of nerve endings at the tip of their chin, same with their nose. You can knock someone out very easily by punching those areas super hard.

Yell a lot user. I've noticed it always scares people shitless. If you seem like a scrawny dude or you're at least not the kind of guy who'd have an Arnold Schwarzenegger yell, then go with a screech of some sort. I've won the few fights I've been in just by scaring the people off. Usually you can chase them into a corner by yelling and running after them, and get the on the ground for really easy shots. Just avoid basic kicking when they're down, because if they're a smart fighter they'll know to go for the other leg when getting kicked (which can mean a quick KO for you).

If you want nerve endings, aim for the spot between the nose and mouth.
use a first knuckle strike or knife hand.
They'll piss themselves.

This niggas right, practice your battlecry. Voocaroo it for us OP.

Autism is not a martial art.
yelling at your mom and your little brother works well.
Won't work so well in a fight.

>Fight the cops too.
If you're not white, this is a really retarded idea, don't go here if you're not really fucking notably white with some really fucking notably white cops. I'm no BLM faggof, but I'm a spic and I get how this shit works.

>I will have a fight tomorrow...

What are you, twelve?

If the lad is really bothering, go over to his gaff and beat the shite of him with a hurl when he's putting the bins out

You're more likely to break your hand hitting those areas, though. The frontal mandible and the maxilla are designed to be hit, that's why they have so many nerve receptors in those areas, and are shaped the way they are.

The front of your face is very very shock absorbent, But a lateral hit to the sides of the mandible is just as effective, and much less likely to hurt you.

Yup or I'd your have the opportunity, push their eyeballs into their skull with your thumbs. Less then an inch of being pushed in towards your brain causes you to piss and shit yourself too.

>The frontal mandible and the maxilla are designed to be hit

Yeah the bone structure is but not the nerve endings.

If he has piercings, yank on them. Fight dirty.

Then trust me, you've never practiced the art of being retarded. It works in every fight I've been in.
I've been in four actual "meet here at this time so I can beat your ass" fights, but I only consider it three since one of them the guy instantly backed off when I started yelling and grabbed for a spoon.
Also, be ready to fight dirty. Think like Jesus Christ it's Jason Bourne picking up bricks and smashing his head into walls dirty. My fave weapon is a chair that has any metal parts on it, makes the whole fight become a lion training session.

>implying its a fucking death match instead of a god damn scuffle.

That's how you get arrested for assault charges, you fucking nigger.

Be aggressive. The person who throws the first punch has a significant advantage, and if you're like the majority of people here, you're not the sort of person it will be expected from.

Other than that just focus on hitting, don't go for wrestling because you'll just lose unless you're bigger/stronger than them.

Punch him in the body till he caves in to defend it then hook em in the fucking jaw. Godspeed op

Those are not real fights.
Real fights are not planned out in advance. You sound like a middle schooler that needs to get hit.

>My fave weapon is a chair that has any metal parts on it, makes the whole fight become a lion training session

I like you, kek. I can picture this autist just screaming and poking this chair at this gangster looking tough guy wannabe kid.

Drop your pants and charge at the fucker.

Beat me to it

Im a fucking medical student m8, that statement is cancer.

Why do you think you have receptive nerve endings anywhere?

The reason is for response time, you're nervous system wouldn't put a death switch in the middle of your face.

Your body wants you to understand that this area is being hit, because its crucial. That's also why the bones structure, musculature, and cartilage in these areas are the way they are. You're meant to dislike the scenario and defend the front of your face, so you don't break that thing that you eat with.

>Real fights are not planned out in advance.

Uh, you and me, behind the school, 3:30 you're dead!

You're also a retard. There's so much wrong with what you said.

Alright dumbass sit your ass down. Didn't read the other replies but I'm gonna guess my advice will be more useful. If you're right handed do as followed. Try to keep a good job. The job is not your powershot, try to look at the distance and set up your straight right hand with that jab. So that means 1 or 2 fast shots with your left and 1 with your right. Try to keep straight shots. Don't go for hooks at a distance seeing as you're not experienced. You can once you get up close but try to keep your distance by giving good straight shots. Don't grapple or fall on the ground with the other guy, this puts you at a disadvantage. One more thing, left foot forward and right foot in the back. One step, one punch. Even if it is a small step. That step will cover more distance and give you speed. A boxing step not a walking step. Move your head, try to slip. I'm not saying have rapid fast reflexes but move your head at a consistent rhythm. Just left to right and a bit up and down. This will give you that head movement and when he punches you're already halfway there. Any more questions?

i wont

If you have any keys, get them, put them between your fingers in a knuckle position, and go for the eye. Go for the nuts as well. AKA fight like a jew.

Kek'd hard

no questions thank you

Hit first....and hit hard

ill try

Op please don't consider this, for your own safety.

Alright I meant *jab

dont attack first, dont provoke him to attack first, then everything you do is self defense.
be alert, watch his movements, especially his arms, when he trys to swing, be ready to dodge.
ideally, you want to catch or redirect his swing by shoving his arm in the direction of the swing to throw him off balance.
your goal is to take him to the ground and get on top of him, once you've done that, attack and dont stop until you've won.
this isnt a prize fight, the winner gets nothing, the looser gets beaten, there are no rules, there is no honor, do anything you can to incapacitate the enemy, fuck body shots, go for the eyes, the balls, if you have a shot at a weak spot dont pull your punches, destroy it.
if you want to send a message, bite him, guaranteed trip to the hospital, possibly a permanent scar.

Seems like this is a good opportunity to ask you some motivation cuz I have a thai boxing fight tonight

Couldn't the guy in the chokehold simply reach up over his head and put his fingers deep into your eyes?
If I ever get into a fight, I'll always go for the cunt's eyes. Nothing like shoving thumbs into eyeballs until they pop to win a fight...

>inb4 goes to prison for blinding someone in a bar tussle

Yeah. Also, I doubt OP or someone with no experience will be able to withstand 5-7 elbows straight in the ribs,

take his legs out

k ill try my best

Do you have any experience in martial arts? Any experience in boxing? This information would help. I'm the guy who called you a dumbass btw.

>. I'm the guy who called you a dumbass btw
no

wait until he try to kick you, then grab his leg bring him to fall and beat the shit out of him

Win it before you begin it. Just bring a gun then you already won.

Open emergency exit door at cruising altitude get rekt.

i dont have any experience

what no?

i dont have any experience

Try to stick your thumb into his anus to show dominance.

Kek if someone would try to win on ground against me he would loose hard since ive done 5 years alone. Would probably choke him

*Judo

Btw if you're nervous, try to remember the other guy is too. I'm a boxer, even I still get hella nervous. Your body is not used to that so it starts to panic. Whatever you're feeling, the other guy is too. It sounds cliche but breathing in and out with deep breaths does help.

k thanks

don't bring a knife to a gun fight.

First rule of fighting is not too fight if you don't really have to. Most times psychologic or moving away is better

I agree
I will only fight him if he makes the first move

So you won't be fighting at all then.
He'll either let you off with a warning or put you on the deck you soppy bolax.

As I said ill share the results in a new threat probably on monday

>There is no honor in getting your ass kicked.
True, but there is even less honor in fighting like a bitch.