Let me tell you the story about how I ended up dating my gf's retarded sister.
1/3
>Be me, 27 >Had a major drug problem which ultimately led to heart failure and the need of an artificial one >Have normie 7/10 gf for 6 years who doesn't have a clue about my autism >Christmas was coming up and I had no idea what to get her as I'm just terrible at that stuff >Really nervous about not fucking this up >Remember that I kept my old heart after having it replaced >igotanidea.jpg >Decide to buy her other shit like flowers and and earrings >Plan gifting my old organ as the big thing >Can't wrap over the case it's currently in as it's heavy and pretty obvious >Buy a small styrofoam cooler fill halfway with ice >Take old heart, put it in a clear plastic bag and then into the cooler > Gift wrap dat shit >Christmas morning >My parents come over, hers can't make it >Exchange gifts, yadda yadda >She opens the earrings >Goes for the important one >On it I left a note that said not to open yet >She gives me a jokingly shocked look and then says she'll open it later >Day goes on, parents don't leave until after 11 >We clean up for a little over an hour then she asks me: >"Hey it's been awhile since you gave me the present. Is it alright to open it yet? Technically it's the day after Christmas haha." >Say yes and to go upstairs while I grab it >Look through the dark and eventually find it >Head upstairs and see her leaning out the window >"Whoa what're you doing?" >She comes back in >"Oh I was just saying hi to the neighbor who walks his dog with the Christmas sweater on it" >Walk over, hand over gift >She smiles and begins unwrapping >Looks confused when she sees the styrofoam cooler >"Look what's inside" >She pulls the lid off the cooler and pulls out the bag with my heart in it >Her eyes widen in horror and she gags >She screams "OH MY GOD" and throws it out the window >I look out and see it land in the snow next to the neighbor's dog and he picks it up
Lincoln Rodriguez
2/3
>I look back at her and get really pissed >Grab her and shove her out the window >she falls head first and lands not in the snow, but on the fucking sidewalk >She's not moving >Ohfuckohfuck >Neighbor is there still > Get idea >Yell "Calll 911! She just jumped!" > He does >Ambulance and cops come >She's pronounced dead on the spot >Cops question me >Tell some bullshit about her feeling guilty about cheating after I gave her my failed heart >Cops look at me weird but the neighbor corroborates my story as he didn't see much > Everyone leaves >I get my organ back and go inside >Feel like a piece of shit and cry for awhile >Funeral comes up >I go and see her family >See an attractive girl with among them > Realize it's her younger sister who had minor asperges and some other developmental disabilities >Oh shit when and how did she become attractive? >Walk up to her and her parents and give my condolences >Ask if there's anything I can do for them >They ask me to look after gf's younger sister for a few days while they make a few adjustments > I say yes >She comes over after funeral and we talk for a bit >After some time, we're having a pleasant conversation >Make a comment about how pretty she looks >She blushes and says I look good as well >I get closer and tell her that I think she's really pretty >ohgodwhatamidoing >She comes closer as well, giggling >She leans in >I lean in >thisissowrong >Our lips touch and we begin making out >She's obviously not very experienced >We then take it to the bedroom > I'm completely lost in the moment >We fuck for about 40 min >Finish and fall asleep together >This goes on for the next 3 days before she goes back with her parents >Start going out with her at least once a week >Develop a relationship and she moves in with me >Her parents don't approve but whatever >Every now and then go to visit old gf at cemetery to say hi and talk about stuff >Visit her yesterday, December 10th
Evan Garcia
3/3
>Tell her, out loud that I plan on having her retarded sister open the gift she refused to accept >As I begin, loudly at that, people begin to look at me >I don't care, I need this closure >"Last Christmas I gave you my heart" >"The very next day, you gave it away" >"This year, to save me from tears, I'll give it to someone special (special)"
Michael Rodriguez
10/10
Tyler Phillips
I'm actually not even mad. This was pretty good Op.
10/10 Would read again.
Jace Robinson
At the beginning, I thought you were a terrible person At the end, you are one. But 11/10 for the effort
Isaiah Anderson
10/10 not bad
Adrian Hill
kek/10 not even mad
David Hughes
Put me in screencap 10/10
Connor Clark
saved
Jayden Powell
I feel like this is going to become a good ol' meme old fellow
Easton Parker
this is fucking gold OP ahahahah
Jayden Long
Does anybody have that one green text about the user who raped his sister and got beat by her bf and woke up in the hospital?
James Sanders
Bumping ebin thread
Gavin Reed
9000+/10 Thank you OP.
Benjamin Ward
Why do people ask to be included in the screencap? So they can look at the cap in the future, see a dumb, pointless post, and say "LOOK! THAT'S ME!!" That being said, good shit OP, had me going
Aiden Green
Jesus christ that was good
Kayden Hall
ikr so fucking gay just screencap it yourself
Brayden Taylor
Thats some good shit OP. Good job m8.
Matthew Rogers
top fucking kek, you gave me a chuckle OP
Nicholas Taylor
This should be a Tim Burton Movie
Joseph Perry
someone should make this into movie
Alexander Myers
...
Josiah Collins
...
Landon Cook
Bullshit, they don't let you keep shit they remove from you.