They say home is where the heart is...

They say home is where the heart is, so what does it say about my heart that whenever I click my heels together I end up at the fucking titty bar?

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Underrated, desu

I've brought this treachery on myself Ray. I've told every colleague I've ever had that I always land on my feet. Now I realize, they think I'm a fuckin pussy.

>Everyone in this town thinks they got a shot at getting my lucky charms Ray, what they don't realize is that they're the leprechaun, and I'm the rabbit that's just robbed them of all their trix.

Sometimes you'll find yourself in a situation with a gun in the left hand and a knife in the right, and when the moment arises you'll be wanting the gun, but Ray, you're right-handed, and damned because of it.

What, do you think you can just walk into their party and not draw attention? You're a lighting rod in a thunderstorm, so you better find the biggest dick at that orgy and hope he takes all the shock

Casper knows, Rust :)

>tfw I wrote this in the last thread

I don't mind Dude using it desu, but for the love of god remember to remove your tripfaggotry before you try to samefag

They say never start a fight you can't finish. That's the only sort of fight you should start Ray. Only with your back against the wall can you find the will to win.

You know how you cook a lobster, Ray? You freeze it then toss it in the pot. You boil it alive while it's just waking up from a dream. So what we need to do is make these fuckers complacent and then burn everything around them. Get some butter and wrap up your bib, baby, because we're eating this town alive.

Never bring a knife to a gunfight Ray. Bring ammo.

My aunt took me to the zoo when I was six. At the monkey house, there was a chimp who had found a frog in his cage and he was wearing a shit-eating grin while raping that poor frog's mouth.

You know what the difference between us and that chimp is, Ray? We don't got no frog.

They say idle hands are the devil's workshop Ray, but I've known amputees that deserve to go to hell.

Anyone for the best from the originals?

Vinceposting is the definition of a patrician meme, so please

We're building a pyramid, Ray. At first it starts as a square of rocks, and then one day it's fucking the sky like I fucked your wife. So what if the foundations are laid with a few bodies?

This is how you do it. Take an existing saying and pervert it into another one. A lot of people don't understand this. But as they say, when in Rome, but I'm on the Romans side, and the grass doesn't look any greener. Caspere understood this.

I just made this nerd kys. Stop trying to take credit for my work

Daily reminder that season 2 was goat and only redditors that got here because of /got/ and /capeshit/ hate ti

They say dont step on a crack you'll break your mothers back, but you know Ray I say fuck it the bitch is dead anyways.

Life is like a fucking sewer ray, and we're all rats.

They all laughed at Christopher Columbus when he said the world was round, Ray. But I'm standing at the edge of the world and I'm about ready to fuck my own ass.

patrician time digits

Today I will remind them

You ever hear the expression "pissing into the wind", Ray? Well I've been caught with my pants down so many times now that I'm pissing and passing wind.

The switch from tee-ball to coach pitch was a big deal for me, Ray. Everyone told me to keep an eye on the ball, but I just kept swinging. I didn't give a fuck if I got a hit or not. All I cared about was the popsicle at the end of the game. Casper knew this.

No, you don't understand it. It's not a common saying, it's a common meaning. Regurgitating it into a fixed template is how memes become Reddit bullshit, Ray.

If I wanted the same shit forced every day into my mouth I'd be born a fucking Bluejay.

It's too easy if it's just a meaning. It has to be one cliche into another, otherwise any dumbass like you can partake.

they say absence makes the heart grow fonder, well they must love me since im so far gone

They say two in the hand is worth one in the bush, but I've only got one free hand and I used it to vote for Gore.

Backing this user up. I read this same thing in the last thread too.

The one that comes to my head the fastest.
Ray: I-I sold my soul for nothing then!
Vince: If you were selling.....then it sure as hell wasn't me buying

It's a concept drilled into a cliche, not the other way around, Dude.

There's only two things you can count on in life, Ray; death and taxes. Well, I paid all my debts and now I'm counting to ten.

Ray, you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you can. Caspere knew this.

Didn't see that ending coming
Audibly kek'd/10

youtube.com/watch?v=dFh71_ftxLE

You ever hear of Darren James, Ray? He was this pornstar. Real prolific. Would fuck a bunch of girls in the ass. He does this scene with a newcomer -- who knows what the fuck her name is. This girl goes in -- it's her first scene, she can't be expecting anything out of the normal. You know what happens Ray? She got AIDS.First fucking scene.

That's me. I'm that girl, Ray. Put my trust in others, go all out -- go liquid-- get fucked right in the ass for pennies on the dollar and get AIDS, Ray.

They say she sells seashells by the seashore, Ray. But I've been to that beach, and that ain't all she's selling. I've got the crabs to prove it.

Here

I kind of agree, I just like anons to word cliches via their own interpretation before subversion.

X therefore Y is how memes die.

I went to the same beach. I was there to fight with fists of fury, but I came back with a fistful of furry crab nests.

Ray have you ever considered that when you assfuck a woman, you are also assfucking the theory of evolution?

They say don't take anything for granted but I wished for a better life. Happiness doesn't make you rich, Ray. Better to have loved and lost than to never of bought wishes with all your money, Caspierre knew this.

They say God will lead us to salvation. I say God is dead. God died when the Tommy gun of despair unloaded a banana drum into the hills of virtue.

You ever hear of the monkeys paw, Ray? Well, I told that monkey on my back that I wanted to be rich. Word to the wise, chose your words wisely. You see I got what I wanted Ray, but all my riches are in GBP.

truly apoplectic

this

This. Typical tripfag faggotry.

They say that cooler heads prevail Ray, well I've got a cooler full of heads and I'm looking for more.

Fucking brilliant

This is actually pretty good in a non-corny way desu

They say you can judge any man by just looking at his hands, well Ray, I've been staring at mine for over 40 years and you know what I just now realize?
They're fucking feet

They say black don't crack, but you know what, Ray?
I didn't even have my butt cracked until i was 38.

Give what you take Ray, I've been taking basket weaving classes at the learning annex and I want to give you this Nantucket Wicker I made last week. It's on me

It's a dog eat dog world out there. But you know what Ray, I'm the Chinaman.

They say a forced meme can only stand so many reposts before it stops being funny, Ray, and right now, I'm advice dog on meme generator.

go stand in front of a tank

They say close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades Ray. But I don't know which one I fuckin threw.

actually good

Don't count your chickens before they hatch, Ray. But i've been counting for 20 years, and I just now realized they're all fucking stillborn.