Secrets/vent/advice thread

Secrets/vent/advice thread

I'm sure this one will 404 early as well so we can all have more loli and dick rate threads.

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doujin.pomfpomf.moe/info/?id=465

why is every girl i crush on straight
i guess my secret is i dream about coming onto them when we're alone, forcing them into a corner and slamming my hand on the door beside them so they can't escape, and making them bi/les by force

mom finger car friend

I have no fwends

I nutted in your sister while your dad watched.

im dating a 15 year old

I create YLYL threads OP. I create them, and then, when the moment is right, I introduce the banana myself. Usually I do this after about 5 minutes.

One of my masterpieces is currently up on Sup Forums, taunting you all.

banged a married ex last night. it's ok, I'm married too.

i like this girl and she keeps making it obvious that she wants to fuck, bringing up sex all the time, flirting, saying she wants a fwb and all that shit but every now and then she'll say something about her "boyfriend". i have no idea if she actually has one or not, but i have a hard time believing it. i hope she's bullshitting because if she actually does have one and is willing to do this behind his back, she'll do it to me too. which kind ot sucks because we got a lot in common and i actually like her. either way i'm still gonna smash though.

> Was glad when my dad's dad died. . . he was obnoxious and I didn't like him. He loved me dearly.

> If my sibling dies before my parents, my inheritance will double!!!!!

> If I'd known there were so many Blacks at my current workplace, I wouldn't have taken the job.

> I'm anti-immigration except for the lil Chinese mama-san who rubs my weiner

> I really want to go to a Festivus party

> I hope Conor Mcgregor gets literally killed in his next fight

>she'll do it to me too

dude, of course she will. that's what fwb is all about. take it or leave it. if you leave it, you are the faggot we already think you are.

kill your siblings to profit

then kill yourself you racist piece of cuntlitter

>glad dad died

Know that feel bro. Both my parents are gone now. Father in 2012 and mom in 2011. Can't say a single tear has been shed.

9 year old girl cousin wanted me to play with her pussy, so i did as a 4 year old boy
now i just laugh about it, she couldnt get pregnant (i guess) and i couldnt impregnate so that´s ok...

how did you find an older woman you kissless virgin?

kids do this shit all the time.

she told me she's into anal now. did NOT see that coming. can barely get her to suck my dick.

I take a lot of pictures of my little sisters friends when they come over and I can't stop doing it because they are so adorable

blew a load all over my belly last night as a married woman sucked my nipples while I fapped in her hotel room. she told me not to make a mess.

>hawt as fuck. sexual highlight of the year

tell that to the priest.

got any secret ones of them undressing and peeing and shit?

big fucking whoop
do you know how many 6yo~12yo girls I fondled and played with when i was underage?

shit isnt a secret

No, not worth the risk of being registered a pedo for life for some nude pics lol

you keep trying to tell them that in your appeal Jared.

obviously i'm going to take it... it just sucks when you meet a really cool chick and she turns out to be a cheater. but hey, she's into some freaky shit so i'm looking forward to that.

...

I'm feeling rape and pedophilic urges since I'm 15, Probably because my cousin tried to rape me when I was a kid and because I think I kind of liked it.

I've been stealing money from my employer for around 10 years. Probably around 100 thousand dollars at this point.

dude, you really need to look up "fwb" in the dictionary.

>you don't get this

Herein is the difference between old Sup Forums and new Sup Forums.

Old Sup Forums used to be about people knowingly and ironically pretending to be idiotic and fucked up. There used to be a heavy dose my humor in all this shit. This has since been replaced by new people who didn't get the irony of any of it. The newfriends actually thought this was a home for their genuinely held degeneracy and deviance.

win

newfag

Tried to arrange something with her
Basically was told "I'm actually on duty mondays :/"
Sounds kinda sincere? But hard to tell, as it is text and all.
Asked if she knows when she might be free, but no response yet. Granted she has a decently big test today (EMT Practical) so she was probably studying as she says "Like a mad woman"


I wonder, is she just using it as a way out, or is she genuinely wanting to do something? We did tentatively agree to do something over break, but nothing was set concretely then.

newfag

only newfags say shit like this

only newfags say shit like that

jezus, you've become your own fucking meme

give it a rest, faggot. tell your 14 year old friends in the jr high cafeteria at lunch but leave us alone

Am i late? what is going on?

Fuck off.

We're both 20 and awkward in our own ways.

Why am I so dependent on people? Why do I assume so much? Why is my only defense mechanism to prevent myself from getting hurt is to feel like I'm a pest from the start? Why live?

...

I'm 22, still a virgin, I jerk off to girls on omegle and record it, got 26 videos so far

There really isn't enough rope in the world for all you degenerates.

When I lived in japan I used to play soccer with the local neighbourhood kids.
Communication was minimalistic.
One day one of the guys got my pants off and played with my 12 yo penis.

I repressed til about a couple years ago and I've never told anyone.

The actual details are a little fuzzy but I clearly remember one of them touching my dick and I was like, the fuck is going on.

You have to say how old you were at the time, retard.

He did you fucking retard. He said 12 years old

give it a rest. you're acting like you're 14. once was fine. you don't need to do this 8 times a day every day.

I haven't posted it in probably 3 days. And this is a bit of a new thing with her

kys

I just want to get over my shit already. It has been a solid year of being in a stable healthy relationship. My bf legit loves me for me, and I love him too. He is supportive in every way.

I want to get over my anxiety and get out more, maintain the few friendships I have. Get more into my art, my passions, etc. I want to be so many things, do so many things...

Like getting healthy, losing weight, eating a clean whole foods plant based diet. Pursue modern homesteading. Apothecary stuff.... holistic medicines and beauty/aesthetic artisan products.

Do more art, go to art walks and galleries, etc.

I have so much in my head just haven't gone out at all.

In middle school my best friend convinced me to suck each others cocks. After about a month I let him put it in my butt.

He become a criminal and a pedo.

I joined the army and now have a penchant for penis.

Yeah no offense user but you've beaten that whole story to death. I'm sorry that you're too awkward to do anything about it but you need to stop posting about it so frequently, or at least wait until something major happens (like you met up and kissed, or she calls you and tells you to fuck off).

holistic medicine is horseshit, so you can cross that one off your list. see, you're on you way already

>true story

this

>not samefag

yeah. but that's just like, your opinion man. Fuck big pharma.

I guess. I usually just get stuck over analyzing stuff. Probably that small bit means absolutely nothing.

Shut the fuck up Donnie. You're out of your element.

thanks for the kek

How to kill the rapist of my wife, when I know where he is but not in the same city?

even better he's not in the same city. get an ironclad alibi in your city, don't use credit cards, don't stop to buy gas, slip in, slip out.

winwin

Hot. Even if you're a fat dude playing pretend right now.

>god dosent exist I know this because your mom will die in her sleep tonight.

And how old are you?

Not a secret. Everyone knows.

I sometimes pay for porn.

bump

You shouldn't do that.
I paid $20 for porn one time, and I still wonder if I should have. But I bought a lifetime supply of lolis, so...

...

you sick fuck.

gabor

Pay someone to do it, take the wife out to a restaurant to build an alibi.
Some lowrate disposable thug is best. One who will go back to their own country after the hit to avoid the heat. Or just someone who doesn't give a shit.
You got any leads?

I dunno. Having a brazzer account and downloaded all the HAM stuff was worth it, I feel.

I'm a 16 y/o girl and ive felt this pedophilic urges lately. Idk. I want to get over it soon, but cant help but feel turned on by that loli shit

I had a free brazzers account one time and I can't see paying for it.
I just torrent stuff normally.

post bikini pics of yourself

>fake and gay

I listen to Jet Li by Cheef Keef at least 10 times a day.

It's not a masterpiece, you're fucking cancer. Your autism has reached heights previously unheard of. I honestly believe that people like you are literally retarded. Over 4 fucking years of this shit.

Judging by how you're typing, your sentence structure and your choice of words + age. I know exactly who you are, I didn't think you would be on this board, but it makes sense. Your mother would beat your fucking ass if she knew about this. You know who I am, you rarely see me.

Im a newfag and honestly worried about posting pics

...

Lost my virginity to drunk older step sister on a vacation where we ended up sharing a hotel. She is always rude as fuck to me unless we're alone

I was 18 and she was 21

fake as fuck

I vape.

this just happened

>going for job interview
>grill, late 20s, petite is interviewing
>has pronounced cheek lines and dimples
>low cut shirt
>hot as all hell
>asks me about my previous job and safety regarding it
>trying to maintain eye contact
>i work at a steel extrusion foundry
>i cut the steel
>"at user Steel, we cut the metal and eye protection is a huge priority, because no matter what you do, the swarf..
>..im really.. is really attracted to your eyes
>she smiles and looks around the room
never had a stronger boner in my life

fucking MONSTER
kys

Alicia, you know you're not afraid of posting nudes, do it you fucking whore.

>23
>have associates degree
>5years work experience in IT

Debating taking my savings, 30-50k, move somewhere else and just live. Could try to work, but would probably not. Then when it runs out come back to US to either find another job, or sign life away to military.

Only problems. Lose all or most of my savings. Away for a while potentially. Job is good and easy, hard to throw away. Still wont be the most dissapointing child in my family but feels like a potential waste. If i dont travel now i probably wont be able to when i settle down and have a family. If i meet a girl, id have to either keep living there, or have to chance bringing her back home and potentially not being able to make her happy enough since i threw away my job.

Theres sooo many thoughts, anyone have advice?

and suck cock I assume

dubs of truth. unfortunately b&

Good for you user carry on

And ironically still a virgin

yes, although its not gay because they are traps, it makes me straight, they have feminine body and tits

>still a virgin
Literally how?

tits or timestamp. both would be perfect

No timestamp, clearly a ruse.

Hey user, not a lot of experience here but if you feel like you would be happier somewhere else then just do it.

great idea because then one day you'll retire and have nothing. and then really be fucked. but if you plan on killing yourself before you get old, go for it.

then tits
also i doubt you are 16