ITT we are a SWAT Team, we describe how to tactically raid a perp house

ITT we are a SWAT Team, we describe how to tactically raid a perp house.

Dubs decide what or who is in the house

I'll go first:

I check the windows

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Coreys in the house

i check the titties

swap out our guns for pink stuffed animals and swap out all grenades for rubber duck squeaky toys

I'll be the asshole who leaves the radio on blocking communication.

I'll also be the one hanging back by the van.

I molotov all exits to the house and call it good.

I ring the doorbell

Joe Pasquale is in the house threatening to goatse the universe

Johnson and Crawford charge in yelling islamic prayers while shooting squirt guns that havent been pumped enough

the guns are filled with cum

Swat charges in only to realize the floor has been boobytrapped with marbles and bananapeels. they start tripping and falling over each other

We have to get an overly large mole to dig through the floor

oh shit guys, they have trained guard bees

so is your mother

I break my leg after tripping over a live grenade

Sergeant McNabb picks up a phone to start negotiations. He is heard yelling and giving strict orders to the suspect. After 30 minutes, he realizes he's been talking into a banana the whole time.

There is a meth lab in the basement and i light a cigarette

A suspect gets a baton shoved up their ass

Joe slowly places a shoe on head to identify himself and signal that hes serious. Officer Brown slowly removes a sharpie from his shirt pocket. Joe nods. Brown slowly bends over and shoves a sharpie in his pooper

I spot a nigger. I authorize lethal force on the spot.

reroll

Nigger is in custody. Joe is still in the house threatening to goatse the universe.

What do?

and trips is the guy getting swatted

Send in Hillary Clinton to benghazi his ass

We breach the room and finger his asshole until he bleeds out, recording the whole thing.

OP here, Turns out doors are booby trapped

what do?

Reroll

We send Jenkins in

I have a jewish dreidel, spinning it to see how much money we take from the filthy goiyms right after we're done swatting them.

Tell team to toss all of their weapons through the window and surrender themselves to the perps

Jenkins goes up to the door. Turns the handle.

CRACK! THUD

Jenkins falls over dead.

Joe is still a threat and he's getting impatient.

cant, this idiot fucked with our radios

It's almost lunch break. Can we go get some food and do this in a little while?

Plus Jimmy forgot the battering ram at the station again...

Roll

I'll be morgan freeman and narrate this shit

Rollan

same
fag
got

We're going to 5 guys. whos payin

someone call jimmy to get that shit, fat fuck eating donuts.

do eet

Wake up, it was just a dream.

We pick the wrong house.

..And now, we see user's trying to break into somebodies house. Little did they know, neckbeards cannot fully cooperate and efficiently work with other members or society. So, as the young neckbeards struggle, the actual officers on the team are gunned down.

youtube.com/watch?v=mII9NZ8MMVM
watch this video or your mother slowly grow cancer. The next time you will talk to her she will stutter as a result.

Nuke em

>imb4 massive loss of civilian life

Nuke em

As the neckbeards struggle with swatting the house, their mothers and fathers hang themselves, the first wishing that they had an abortion, and the later blaming themselves for not pulling out. But, their children do not care, and shove sharpies in their poopers. 'Tis life on Sup Forums.

Leeroy Jenkins it. Fuck all you faggots I got this.

one off
n
e

o
f
f

these boys pop through the door

remember

no chicken

Kek

The roo is on fire

If dubs i ban you from 4chins tonight bearus

Well, we forgot the permit. Back to the station boys