Be me

>Be me
>20
>Virgin
>Asocial (unable to socialize)
>Depression
>Zero friends. Hardly know anybody
>Spends days browsing porn and listening to melancholy music at home
>Literally never leaves house unless going to college
>Goes to college and awkwardly stares at everyone and keeps mouth shut
>Watches other students talk and hang out
>Wants to hang out and connect
>Absolutely unable
>Feels really hurt
>Goes home
>Punches trees and drinks Listerine
>Cries like a fag
>All alone

Seriously, I have a problem. I was brought up in an isolated environment, and now I just can't get out of my own head and get shit together, even know it may seem easy. If you think you're shy or bad around people, you should see me. I have an extreme social fobia and on top of that I feel like I just don't know how to connect. I know I'm still pretty young, but I honestly think I'll probably die alone and virgin. That's the last thing I want. I'm not even ugly. Girls seem like they really dig me the first few seconds, until I disappoint them when they try to talk to me (avoid eye contact, mumble, no confidence, nervous af, etc.)

What do? I can't afford counseling.

*phobia

Kill Yourself

At this rate, seems reasonable

Don't eat for 24 hours then go for a 5 mile run and see how you feel. Read about intermittent fasting. It's helped me be less anti social but only when combined with exercise.

Try Xanax. Honestly makes all of your worries melt away and anyone can be social on it.

Intermittent fasting? I'll have to check that out. Thanks for the advice, man, even if it ends up being a dead end.

Perhaps you should work out and get out there?Who cares about rejection, you only get one life, make the most of it.

Don't worry I'm 29 going to be 30 in February tried to take my life multiple times but I mean I have major anxiety to the point if I say a wrong word or phrase I'm scared there going to hate me but it's to the point where I have to realize Im not dead after all the endless times I've tried I've been helped by my neighbors,coliges and since then I've thought I have a reason to live even though I live in constant fear of being an outcast I still see the small things trust me I'm a 220lb fag and I haven't killed myself you shouldn't I know this sounds corny but your Sup Forumsros are here that's what matters

Xanax? Is that a drug? I recently ordered some herbs called Kanna, which probably aren't gonna work because they're herbs. Medication sure would work. I'll look into it. (Probably have to tell the doc about my problems though to get prescription..)

The fact that you can recognize your problem(s) without anyone else actually pointing it out to you means your introspective enough to deal with your own bullshit. It's all in your head, which you're in control of, so start fucking acting like it. Take control of your life.

I used to be one of the "odd children" growing up as I was isolated on a farm. Now I'm popular in college and have a great girlfriend. It came with a change of scene and recognizing that the weird shit I was pulling wasn't gonna cut it anymore.

This

Yeah, I think I just need to learn to lose my fear of judgment and rejection, it's holding me back so bad

Thanks. And I really hope you're doing great. Good luck

drugs are a crutch and you will just end up worse off, with an addiction / dependency in the end.. or may end up a serious addict.. benzos are bad news.. i was prescribed them for anxiety for years..

since you recognize your problem, the only real, lasting solution, is just to force yourself to interact with people. you will feel anxiety, but eventually, over time, you'll get more comfortable with it. just takes time and practice. suck it up. don't be a little bitch. just grow some balls, man.

Thanks man. And I hope you're doing great. Hopefully I can get things on track

If only get out of these habits I've developed. It's so hard

Good to see user agreeing with me!

Start small. Don't throw yourself at a random party and try to talk to everyone there. Hit up Omegle and try to have an actual conversation. For fucks sake, go to the animal shelter and talk to dogs or something. Anything that gets your mouth and brain moving in sync.

You're right. I need to be a man. I'm so tired of being pathetic

On top of working out and getting out, try some meds or something.I started taking them and it changed my life around.Though it may not work for you, just remember that only you can control your life, not others.

Hey, that Omegle thing sounds like a good idea. It'd be so akward...Oh well, gotta start somewhere

Niggers, amiright guys

And remember that change, especially big change, doesn't happen overnight. It'll take a lot of work, especially if you've gotten yourself into a certain unhealthy mindset. Just keep chipping away at the problem. It took me years to figure out the kind of guy I want to be (and I'm still working on it -- one of my NYE resolutions is to stop being such a player) but I'm miles ahead of where I was even before coming to college. BTW I'm 20 as well, so you got this bruh.

OP here, thanks for all this advice, guys. Honestly didn't expect any. This is really encouraging, though. Good shit. I just need to make it happen and stop being a pussy, because being a pussy is what's holding me back from doing what needs to be done

Ayy, that's the spirit, champ. New year, new you.

user I think I can understand from where you're coming from. The thing is, think about life in this way, everything will end; you, me & everybody will be forgotten. So, if you care about how others find you or react to you, stop giving shit. Do whatever you want, be fearless, if you want to act normie, just go and talk to them. World will not end if you get negative feedback. but, if you don't, then you'll have friends.
Consider asking money from your parents for counselling if you really can't take it

Social skills are something that needs to be trained, just start with little conversations here and there until you find yourself confortable. Look for your starting point and avoid comparing to others, it's pointless.

There's always that fear of getting rejected, it's pretty common, we all have it at some degree, just remember that results will never be as bad as you anticipate.

I never cured my austism as still tfw nogf but like I did some stupid camp thing that lasted a week and basically forced myself to talk as all of us knew no1, it made me less spaghet but not much,

>stop being a pussy, because being a pussy is what's holding me back from doing what needs to be done
Proud of you OP

Good point. Everyone's gonna die and this life will be over quick, and so will the world. That's oddly satisfying and reassuring somehow lol

>be 18
>day to day military life as virgin child grunt
>hate myself, so lonely
>use dating app on holiday stand down
>uniform gets a lot of chicks messaging
>get ones number, text for nonstop, annoying
>payoff of a hookup
>can deal with my life now knowing im not a virgin

Feels good man.

See a therapist if there's one at your college, you could have social anxiety or autism

Kek. I love how US military takes anybody and turn them into something desired

Good dose of shrooms in a dark room to attempt curing your social anxiety and/or depression

Watch self improvement videos on youtube


Top 2 things i can think of

Dude, nobody has ever said they're proud of me before. And you just said it...(in Sup Forums of all places). Thanks fam, I got this. Means alot, you saying that (for some reason)

Too poor for shrooms. Guess it couldn't hurt to watch self help vids, though.

shrooms 100% they helped me through alot of my social problems.

We're proud of you Op. Now implement the changes and report back, we ya?

Will*

Will do, my friend. I'll make these changes my primary objective

I know right. im just some lazy dumb asshole

You play any videogame?

OP, you'll be okay. Like somebody else said, you want to change and that's a good first step.

If you do try fasting, do not do like that other guy suggested and go for a five mile run on an empty stomach. I'm a runner and that is a retarded way to make yourself collapse on the side of the road.

One thing that helped me be more social is trying local tabletop gaming groups. Board gamers are some of the nicest people you'll meet. They're also nerds so you'll actually have things in common with them.

do you live alone? what do you do on the internet? if there's any kind of multiplayer game or forum you go to you should start speaking on mic. start with that just to get used to actually talking to people

(OP) Rarely. I used to play alot. Last game I played was Skyrim. I plan on playing the Dark Souls games pretty soon. I finally stopped playing the old PS2 and XBox and got a Steam

Sound advice. Yeah, joging for five miles would kill me, even if I haven't been eating lol. Also, hanging out with fellow nerds sound really promising. They'll have my interests and everything. Plus maybe they're socially awkward too lol

Good idea. For some reason I always think I have to start off by hanging out with a crowd, which will probably never happen if I don't take small steps first. And for some reason I always forget about how interactive the internet can be, and only use my keyboard (like I am now)

Also I don't live alone. I have my bros (which are the only people on this planet I'm able to talk to and hang out with)

>Tfw so useless you can't even kill yourself properly
>multiple tries