Monkey paw

Monkey paw
Make a wish faggots

i wish that every data housing facility that has anything to do with the debt i still owe on my car would burn down, also my car dealership, also my car dealer, just because he's a lying tool.

I'd like some monkey paw.

I wish for a girlfriend.
Or at least to have one opportunity to get laid this year.

I wish to die.

also your car

Gf or money

A wish ? I wish I knew about this earlier

Wish granted. You are now millions in debt to cover the fire damage.
Wish granted. Your one opportunity to get laid is in a cheap motel with a child prostitute. The walls are paper thin and there are police in all the adjacent rooms.
Wish granted. You suffer a stroke and are legally dead for two minutes. You are then revived, but have suffered serious brain damage.

i wish for moar monkey paws

I wish monkeys where no longer on the red list.

No, I want to die completely.

a gf

I wish OP wasn't a faggot.

I wish I'd get trips

Well fuck...

How about some money to pay the mortgage loan of this month?
*giggle giggle*

Lol i see these noobs don't know how monkey paws work. Fucking summerfags

I wish my family would stop fighting over stupid shit

Wish granted. You are incinerated and die all the way this time. No other tricks with this one, honest.
Wish granted. You get more money from another loan. The interest rate is absurdly high.
Wish denied.

MONEEEEEY

I wish to have more luck in my life.

I wish you'd kill yourself tonight, you cunt nugget

I want to be happy

I wish I didn't have the flu.

I wish to get a good job

for gf to take me back

I wish I was beta

nigger why not just wish for a lot of money then?!

I wish I had a monkeys paw

To get lucky tomorrow

Wish granted. Your family members gain extremely pacifist attitudes that leave them unable to cope with any conflict in their lives.
Wish granted. You now absorb the luck from those around you. This effect escalates over time, eventually causing all people you meet to die to extremely unfortunate circumstances within moments.
Wish granted. You are now the President of the United States. It's a very good job. Congratulations on the promotion.
I'm already a monkeys paw fuckwad

i wish i had a cool miata.. with super turblows and a huge wing ding

Read a book. That's the first thing they do in the original monkey's paw story, and their wish is granted when their son is killed in an accident. The mother wishes him back to life, but when whatever came back knocks on the door, the father wishes it dead again, because it's clearly not human.

I wish for a scooter made of gold!

i wanna turkey samwich with lettuce and mustard, on rye bread
AND I DON'T WANT ANY ZOMBIE TURKEYS
I DONT WANNA... TURN INTO A TURKEY MYSELF!

and i dont want any other weird surprises, you got it?!

I wish to know how to make molly/ lsd/dmt and morphine

I'm beginning to think this may be how the POTUS was elected by the EC.

I wish to be a werewolf

I wish that the girl im talking to right now falls inlove with me

I wish that monkey hand, with the powers it has, never existed.

I wish for more spooderman pics

Wish granted. The scooter isn't very sturdy since, you know, it's made entirely of gold.
Wish granted. Your skills become very well known. A local gang kidnaps you and forces you to produce drugs at gunpoint.
Wish granted. The transformation is involuntary and extremely painful. You are as dumb as a dog while in wolf form. You cannot cure the condition.
*poof*

I wish to get a job and become independent before I become too old.