Ask a mormon anything

Ask a mormon anything.

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what do you think about the south park episode regarding mormons?

How many genders are there ?

DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB

No thanks

Ehh, they're salty ex mormons
2
What a creative and original argument.

Why does your religion seem so lame ? You should spice it up like the Islamic people do. they seem to have all the good times getting stoned and raped.

How do you feel about the Joseph Smith's criminal record as a scoundrel before he "found" the golden plates?

Are you from the future?

What's wrong with you? Are you fucked in the head or something?

Because, being flashy is usually the mark of a false church.
And if any religion could be considered "flashy".
Samson murdered thousands.
By those standards, Joseph Smith was rather mild.

Where are you from? I'm Mormon to from Australia

JOSEPH SMITH IS A MASSIVE PHONY

DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB

wot

Nah, unfortunately time travel isn't our thing.
Nope, just like the mormon church better than any other churches/plain atheism
Burgerland, not to far from Nauvoo.

ITT: ask a moron anything.

Why would you want to he a Morman? Goddamn normies having religious beliefs and what not.

youtube.com/watch?v=46PXaJxzuDE

Glad to see you've got a chant to shout when people say anything reasonable.
God created man and woman.
Don't remember the part where he made planetsexuals and dimorphodemitrigonometry sexuals.

Gotta admit, despite being mormon, this made me chuckle.
Never heard that one before.
No seriously, I haven't.
Nice job taking my moron/mormon virginity.
Begone, foul demon, back to the deep depths of /r/atheism from whence thou came!

What's with the underpants?

Deus Vult?

Aren't you breaking most of the rules of your religion by being on Sup Forums?

OP BELIEVES IN MAGIC PANTIES

DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB

ya he is

all religions are shit, but yours is the worst next to Islam. Why OP?

its a feature user

it's me, ur bother

Modesty, mostly.
It's not "magical", it's just that I doubt go wants people strutting around in g-strings.
Mormons are less the "Sack and destroy type." and more the "Sneakily convert everyone to your religion by not being an asshole." type.
But yeah, Deus Vult.
Doctrine and Covenants never said anything about Sup Forums.

'Thou shalt not browse the cesspool of the internet'

have fun in Mormon prison

Hell ye

I don't see how my religion is any wore than Westboro Baptist church, or any number of other cruel, hateful churches.

The South Park guys were never Mormons.

>Doctrine and Covenants never said anything about Sup Forums.
LOL

Your founders were murderers, and Satanists. Your church has NOTHING to do with Jesus.

OP IS PART OF A CULT OF MORONS

DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB

Leak/see any snapchat users private pics/nudes with snap leak .cf! Sup Forumsros use it before it's patched and don't share it.

Jokes on you I paid indulgence to my local church so I'm no- oh wait wrong church
Well I'll be damned.
Even so, the whole point was that none of that matters in the end, because even if we're not the most reasonable, we're the nicest.
Which means you missed the point.
Well thanks random citizen who apparently knows more about my own church than I do, I am sure enlightened.

Samson wasn't real, he was a myth. Joseph Smith was real, just like Bringham Young. Both disgusting murderous pieces of shit.

more legit than a mormon

That's not a question.

Mormanism: Jesus (a Jew) is always pictured as an Anglo-Saxon Adonis (see pic for what he really looked like)

Magic Underwear

All good Mormans becuome Gods of their own Universe after they die.

UFO to God.

You're peddling some seriously insane garbage.

Fuck you, cult member.

Why is cult always the first thing thrown around?
Depends on your interpretation.
And when did they murder.
Look up "Missouri Executive Order 44"

Where is your secret underwear?

You should be enlightened on your demon worshipping cult. The founders worshipped Baal, not Yahweh.

Yahweh is a cuck

Yeah, what's the deal with the temple garment?

That rendering of "Jesus" is bullshit. Alexander the Great spread Nordic genes throughout the Middle East 300 years earlier. Jesus could have been blonde with blue eyes, and there are still blondes being born from Egypt to Pakistan from the Greek influence.

Bringham Young was a well known murderer, and so was Joseph Smith. Learn about your leaders, you pig fucker.

OP IS OBLIVIOUS TO HIS OWN NAIVETY

DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB

Except we admit we don't know what he looks like.
All we have is something that looks similar.

Not magic, just modesty.

Everyone's supposed to, even you. It's generally the idea of a cycle, eventually we all become god, then those under us become god, so on, and so forth.

lolwut

no u

>>Alexander the Great spread Nordic genes throughout the Middle East...

funny how only Jesus got those genes and everyone else got a Jew's beak.

>>Except we admit we don't know what he looks like.

But you think he looks like Thor. Minus the hammer.

Can non-LDS guys date LDS women? You have some seriously beautiful women who are members of the LDS church. I almost dated a girl who was Mormon but her family intervened and scared her out of it.

No, Joseph was the cuck, you retard. Yahweh fucked Joseph's wife, and he stayed with her to raise the kid. Stop using the term "cuck" as you have no idea how to use it. You probably just started using it last year. I've been using it as an insult for over 15 years.

Non-op Mormon here
Like he said already not magic underwear
does it matter what Jesus looked like really
What's the point of coming to earth and being tested if we're just going to heaven? Didn't we come from heaven anyway?
No idea what the ufo to good bs you said is

Alexander the Great was Macedonian, making him a Greek. You are a stupid asshole.

Can blacks be proud members of the LDS Church, my insane friend?

...

lolno
Entire theme was jesus.
From the beginning.
Some people even tried worshipping the prophets descendants, we said "Fuck that", and they fucked of to Mexico to become an "Actual" cult.
Modesty
Source.
We think he looks godly, who would've thought?
Yeah, but it's recommended that members don't, since we don't bang outside of marriage, date for the sole purpose of marriage, which isn't good enough for a lot of non-members.
And not to mention religious differences can be an issue, especially when kids pop up.

Do you guys think the pajamas are silly? They seem pretty silly.

Sure.

They hate niggers. It was one of the things the founders all agreed on, that niggers should be slaves again.

Do u masturbate?

>>does it matter what Jesus looked like really

No, but its funny that to mormans he without exception looks like a swedish blonde haired model. Born in a land where that was pretty fucking rare. Like 1 in 10 million.

>Alexander the Great spread Nordic genes

lol

That's the dumbest fucking thing I've seen today.

How does that make me stupid, exactly?

Greeks (and Macedons, and whatever else in the area) back then were more Germanic. They only became swarthy from 2000 years of Islamic hordes coming up North.

how many you got in your congregation? Er, Pod?

>Alexander the Great
>Nordic
>fucking anything that wasn't the most beautiful queen in the world or a dude

Jesus never stepped foot in the Americas. Your founder also made everything up, just like L. Ron Hubbard.

>Greeks were German!

HAHAHA - seriously, you're killing me!

By pajamas, do you mean "magic underwear"?
In which case, again, not magic, just modesty.
we were already universally despised, having a reputation as "nigger-lovers" would have gotten us genocided.
no, i have consensual sex with my wife
>We make Jesus look godly
who woulda thunk
None, but I'm rural.
We do have quite a few Pacific-Islanders though, not sure why.

What the fuck is a Mormon, sounds like a brand of biscuits.

You are stupid. Germans were never true Nordic people in the first place.

>Yeah, but it's recommended that members don't, since we don't bang outside of marriage, date for the sole purpose of marriage, which isn't good enough for a lot of non-members.
And not to mention religious differences can be an issue, especially when kids pop up.

Her family went ape-shit crazy when they found out I wasn't Mormon, which was within 10 minutes of them meeting me, when I told them. I respected her celibacy wishes and wanted to date her with the goal of wanting to marry her, but her family didn't think I was good enough for her, which sucks, cause she ended up dating a Mormon dude who totally ended up abusing her and divorcing her.

k
It's a nickname for "The latter day saints", or LDS for short.
Named after one of our more well-known books.
Controversial brand of Christians, that everyone loves to hate.

>>That rendering of "Jesus" is bullshit.

Yep. I thought he was Jewish. Now your\'re saying he's greek. But he looks like this? Come on pal...

Germanic now? A moment ago it was Nordic. Why not throw in Martian as well?

Aw shit, sorry dude.
But that's not the church, that's just a shitty family.
Like, that kind of shit is heavily frowned upon.
To the level of "No open punishment, but you will be stripped of all priviledges, and shunned until you leave this particular church" level.
Actually, the church would have wanted her to date you, see if she liked you, and whether she did or didn't, try to convert you.

I love this real story of how Smith "transmitted" the golden plates to the world. You know he dictated the "words on the plates" to his wife while they lay in a covered box, right?

And he refused to show them to anyone, even her.

He can't help it, he's retarded.

>consesual

Ha, sure. Didn't know brainwashing was considered consensual.

Why be modest about God's creation? If you're beautifully sculpted by His design is it not a sin to cover it up? The first man and woman live in paradise in the nude. Clothes are the invention of man to hide man's shame. How could the heavens edict the people to hide his own creation?

OP is a cuckold that wants to go back in time to eat Joseph Smith's ass.

>>We make Jesus look godly
>who woulda thunk

Yeah well, I guess looking Jewish isn't that, right pal? How about Black? Could he look Negro?

Yeah, I get it.

Oh well, that's life. She was the one, I'm convinced. I'm done with dating and relationships now. All my friends say get back out there and find someone, and I tell them "I did find someone." That usually shuts them up.

>Could he look Negro?

(I'm guessing not...)

Shouldn't he look middle eastern? White people love projecting themselves as one of them.

Eve wasn't the first woman, Lilith was. Lilith was created at the same time as Adam, and refused to be subjugated. In turn God made her a demon, and created Eve from Adam's rib. Learn the actual biblical myths.

Do you realize that you're a nutbag who will believe anything?

>brainwashing
She was a member before I met her, bdd pal friendo amigo
Because you show it off with the intent of leading others into temptation.
nigga das gay
We made Jesus look like the stereotypical western ideal of god.
Are we going to talk about asian or black jesus, or are we just going to realise that different peoples see jesus differently.

Way to completely miss the point and make a semantic argument. -2 Internets for you.

That's the original version from the Torah.

Are you stoked to rule your own planet someday?

Eat my satanic asshole.

You guys are pretty cool. I moved to Grantsville for a couple years, and when I was trying to get on my feet the local church cut me a check for my rent. I was straight up with them about not believing in much of anything, much less the Book of Mormon, and they still helped me out. Most of the missionaries that came to my apartment were my age so we just talked about comics and mountain biking. Thanks, Joseph Smith!

If you are not smart why would I ask you anything? Moron.

Well, you did say they divorced, right?
You could still get with her, if she really was the one, she might still be.
If that was the artists idea of godly, sure.
do i look like a jew
Well shit guess I have to believe that too
For now yeah, but by then I'd be a different person, and I'm sure it'd actually be a massive headache.
Not just a few, but billions of screaming, whining, misbehaving children.