ITT: Your worst secrets

ITT: Your worst secrets

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something something atheism and prove something blah blah

I installed pinhole cameras to watch our 14 year old daughter undress in her room and have unlimited OC to fap to. Wife has no idea.

pics or didnt happen

...

On my second tour in Afghan I deliberately aimed low on Tali and shot 6 maybe 7 in the genitals.
None died quickly.

There has to be some proof posted

PFC Taylor?

Damn it Carl

Pyle

you're villanizing them, as if they were the enemy

>>I mixed up all this fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. And I never felt so bad in my entire life!

Caught some Mexicans hiding out in an old barn on our property near the border. Chased them out, but knocked down one beaner cutie as they were running. None of the others even tried to help her, they just ran. Took her back to the barn and taught her a lesson I doubt she will ever forget. Should have taken pics because that ass was so sweet.

dubs of truth

Kek. The reason I asked is because we had a guy in our squad that would do that shit. We had a laugh about it years later.

I ate an entire bowl of cereal once...

Without any milk

What the fuck? Is this real life?

>hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa

I was a real shithead kid but Sup Forums has straighten me out.

I once lied on the internet

me too

In third grade, I cheated on my history exam

checked and kek'd

>> In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play.

>> In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog…

I invite guys over and let them jerk off and cum into my sisters panties

>> When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out

I had consensual sex for the sole purpose of procreation.

This one time, at band camp......

What kind of camera do you use? I'm asking for a friend...

where do you live?

Well, during one Grad Night, two teens were in the Haunted Mansion. They thought because it was dark inside, no one would see the girl giving the boy a blowjob. Little did they know, some of Master Gracey’s servants were hiding in the walls of the mansion. The teens were caught in the act by one of them, who shouted out from the darkness, ‘You’re doing it wrong!’ Girl bit his penis. Medic, security, managers, everyone you can imagine who needed to be involved was there.”

On Pirates of the Caribbean, about halfway through the ride, a couple that had up until then been making out, shifted and looked like they were changing seats. To my surprise, the guy bent the girl over the rail into the next row and began banging her from behind with all his might and they both were moaning as loud as humanly possible. Security was waiting at the exit for them and I’m pretty sure they were banned from the park. It was the most uncomfortable 15 minutes of my life.”

>family reunion
>hadn't seen my little cousin since she was 8
>she's 14 and omfg her body is amazing
>were all drinking
>keep feeding her alcohol all night
>she gets blackout hammered
>go up to my room
>she lays down in my bed
>passes out
>try to wake her up
>no movement
>pull her pants down a little
>no resistance
>pull them down to her knees
>lock door and start fingering her
>she moans as I rub her clit
>my dick is diamonds
>try to get her to suck my cock
>she is too drunk to do anything
>position her near side of bed
>run my cock along her ass crack
>tease head between her pussy lips
>cum hard on her ass
>clean it up and pull her pants back up
>fall asleep on the floor next to the bed
>wake up
>she is super embarrassed
>"I'm sooooo sorry user, please don't be mad"
>turns out she pissed the bed
>remembers nothing
>make her feel guilty about it for years

I'm serious asshole, i want to jizz in your sister's panties.

I popped my cousins leg out of socket buy holding her legs up while having sex with her

Gold right there

I've gone gay for pay. I made a lot of money sucking off older guys my last two years of high school. Never done anything since I graduated and that's been 11 years.

Houston, you?

dammit, no, I live in VA

how much did you get

How much did you make?

I've jacked my brother off for video games

>be 18/19
>father is downstairs
>randomly checking closet of my father for money
>nomoney.jpg
>find strap-on + big dildo hidden behind some clothes
>take dildo to my room
>luckily have lube
>try to insert
>toobig.jpg
>try again
>works but alot of pain, try for couple of minutes, but cant really pleasure myself
>keep it in my room all night
>hear my father rumbling in his closet at night
>fuck is he looking for his dildo?
>he's in his room for too long
>goes downstairs again
>quickly go bathroom, clean dildo, put back in closet, go back to my room
>dad comes upstairs again and starts rumbling in his closet

one week passes

>horny as fuck
>want to get dildo from my dads closet again
>no dildo, no strap-on
>search through whole house, find strap-on in a random little cabin downstairs
>dildo nowhere to be found

My father and I have never ever talked about it, but we both know the same dildo entered our ass. I'm still using his strap-on as a dildo. Its a lot smaller and gives me the best orgasms I've ever had.

I pimp out my gf on backpage. Most guys cum in a few minutes and then gtfo. Some weekends, I'll pull in $2k. The best part is I don't give her the money, she does it because she's a fucking whore with no self esteem and a severe complex about me leaving her. Her life was so fucked up, this is an improvement. I don't really love her, but she is insanely in love with me. Figure I can keep this up for a while.

you better wear a condom with this one unless you want your dick to fall off.

what state are you in

I let my girlfriend fuck my dad

Green text story requested

I trick my son into letting me fuck his girlfriend. She is really into me and uses him as a cover for us to fuck.

He has no idea.

I'd make anywhere from 40-60 for a blow job usually. One guy never wanted to cum in my mouth and only lasted about two minutes, so I'd usually get 25 from him.

Another guy was also a really quick cummer, but he'd cum in my mouth and paid me 75. He was my favorite client.

I didn't do it a ton. I'd bring in about 250 a week for a total of about two hours work.

My mother thinks my quiet manner is respectful. It is truly murderous rage and a blinding desire for revenge.

This was supposed to be in reply to this too

you two are stupid she is playing both of you

Revenge for what?

kek

copypasta

>It was the most uncomfortable 15 minutes of my life

that made a b/tard uncomfortable??

nice trips anyway

What state?

nice double dubs

how did you explain that one?

I'm in NY. All the guys are covered, everything. It's hilarious to watch them go in, drop $150 for an hour and then leave 10 minutes later.

c'mere slut

Not double dubs, you dubtard.

I make shitty YouTube videos from my mom's basement and am a disgrace to my family.
youtu.be/bfgp3Q3YWdo

Not interested anymore and you wouldn't be able to afford me now anyway.

Only $150?!?!?!!?

she must be one fat, ugly, skanky whore.

A mediocre white girl can get $200 / hr out here. 55 year old Asian MILFs get $160 / hour.

nice dubs yourself mister

where do you live that people pay 200 to fuck?

just for the sake of the argument, what would your price be now?

>everybody has a price

San Francisco bay area

>inb4 faggots

Played around with a 6 year old. Rubbed her nipples/pussy. Showed her my dick. She was really indifferent about it. Seemed shy but possibly interested? Pro tip: Not worth the shame you'll feel for the next year.

not enough Doritos

I go for those $160/hr asian MILFs. so compliant. They lick your asshole and latch onto your cock until they milk every drop of cum from your ballsack. Most will do it twice if you get hard again quick enough. I had one, the best of the lot actually, who would do 3peats

Suck and swallow, I'd want at least 500.

So you took a bean dip?

>but possibly interested?

not sexually interested at that age fucktard

Regular gay stuff. I lost my virginity to a 43 yo when I was 17. He fucked me raw. It was the only time without a condom. I've been gaying it up for 5 years and have gotten fucked by like 7 different dudes.

wow. your prices is pretty fucking low.

Me, personally, it would take at least $10,000 for me to consider it. That's always been my answer in those "straight guys - how much would it cost for you to suck
a man's cock (get ass fucked) blah blah" threads.

Luckily no one is ever going to offer this fat old short dude $10,000 for sex, so I don't exactly have to worry about making that decision.

You, on the other hand, are $500 away from it.

still not gay

She's not some pro. She's just dumb, desperate and does what I tell her.
She's not fat or ugly either. Again, It's not about making max profit. It's about making some cash and keeping her in her place.

If I saw her out here for $150 would assume she's a total aids infected crackwhore with serious emotional issues and a horrible fuck.

just saying.

for your own safety, charge more to get a higher class clientele less likely to be diseased and less likely to try to rob you and shit

>profit

I've sucked dick a few hundred times, it would be kinda silly to act like it'd be the most revolting thing in the world. It's not horrible, just not a turn on.

I found this 19 year old flip chick who's boyfriend had no idea what the market was and was whoring her for $80 for 30 minutes. She had huge titties and was tight as hell. She was a basket case and didn't know how to fake being into it, but quite a worth cum receptacle at that price. she was so fucking stupid she used her real cell phone and was google-able to get her real name.

I'll still take the MILFs for $160.

I posted my ex gf so much on Chan her nudes are now searchable of Google when searching her name ... I regret if

I've got $500

bymp

Congratulations. I do too.

>be me
>go out to old barn to shoot
>get there and hear voices
>bust open door and Mexicans scatter
>one girl tries to get her shit together
>full body check put her to the ground
>other beaners use this opening to run
>drag her into barn
>she tries to fight and catches a fist to the gut for her trouble
>dump her shit out from her bag all over the floor
>she starts crying
>now, she either tries to get something from her bag or go for my gun, still not sure
>assume she goes for my gun
>knee her in the chest and hold her down on the ground
>pull her pants down
>hold her by her head and push her legs apart
>she sobs the whole time but I don't give a fuck
>get my dick out and push her legs apart
>doesn't go in easy but goes in
>fuck her until I cum
>climb off her and she just lays there crying for a half hour
>grab gun
>tell her to get the fuck out
>she tries to get her shit and I force her out the door
>"you come back... muerto"
>do the finger across neck
>she goes off the direction of the others
>don't even feel bad because Mexicans are shit

On new years eve I made out with a cute 10yo girl for about 20 minutes

My area, it's a lot of white business guys and married dudes. We have a no black guys policy.

your 'gf' seems to have a wedding ring on Slick

Wrong hand slick, it's a pic in a mirror. They are just rings.

I'm guilt of committing acts of rape, torture, beastiality, arson, and religious desecration.

greentext if all in the same story

you're the nun fucker from Bad Lieutenant aren't you?

I wish

Sorry they were all separate incidents

here's the disgusting shit you get for $150 / hr out here

greentext?

why'd it stop? if she was indifferent to it, why didn't you fuck her butt?