Any addicts?

Any addicts?

What's your story

I managed to quit heroin after losing all my friends only to become an alcoholic.
I want to quit, but will likely ween down instead of cold turkey.

>177177
Nice, not addicted to anything now. Smoke weed, take kratom, and use some psychedelics occasionally. All in moderation. At one point I got addicted to codeine pretty bad. Got it for a cough at one point, liked the way i felt on it, ended up using it regularly. Got pretty fucked up, glad i'm off it now

Just simple addictions: weed, alcohol and arguably porn (I jack off at least five times a day).

My story is that I'm autistic, so I'm functionally worthless, women won't fuck me (and I can't blame them), people won't hire me and my friends aren't friends, I'm perpetually alone.

So I drink about two to three bottles of wine a day, smoke weed in the interim and I jerk off to avoid thinking about my life for a second in a desperate attempt to postphone my inevitable suicide.

I got nothing in my life, no skills, no job, no partner, no hobbies and no prospects. Some people are born to be worthless, so I'll just be worthless and wasted.

what was your method of getting off it?

cold turkey for alcohol is extremely dangerous.

Alcoholic. Began drinking after my first very serious relationship ended. Realized a little later i was suppressing being sexually abused as a child.

Stayed at my friends for the holidays. His parents called my mother and told her I need serious help with my addiction. I didn't even know they knew. The scary part is I didn't care at all. Cost me the trust of my friend and his family and I just do not even care.

I got piss drunk last night. Looked at my serach history and cringed. Make a facebook account. Don't even want to know wtf I did on there.

Haven't gotten out of bed in like 15 hours besides to piss/get water. This is a typical weekend for me.

I'll end up doing something really cringy or guilt-inducing and start going to AA/trying to better myself. Eventually I just end up slowly getting back to drinking to excess.

I drink because I'm unhappy, and I'm unhappy because I drink.

Sometimes I just wish I wouldn't wake up from my blackouts.

I've smoked a hella weed and eaten a hella kratom. I've never had a problem with alcohol; I dislike drinking quite a bit in fact. I still do it rarely or in social gatherings. I've done mushrooms about 3 or 4 times total. I love psychedelic experiences. I use to get prescribed Xanax I loved them but I quit at a very good time and had no problems stopping.

Kratom isn't the same story. With the exception of a few hydros I've been lucky enough to sample for free, I've never messed with opiates/opiods, or meth, or anything else I haven't listed.

But I took Kratom like crazy back when I use to believe that it was harmless. Fast forward a year and now im physically dependent to it. I feel like I'm in my 60s with no strength or stamina. Now I take 10-15gs a day to function.

Other then overdoing Kratom like a retard, I have no regrets.

I only want to add other psychedelics to my drug experiences, but I will never find chemically pure LSD, or DMT, or even clean cocaine to try.

I tried for the first time but ended up relapsing because the withdrawals felt like shit. Eventually i found out about kratom, really helped, haven't touched the stuff since, nor do i want to

Thats why I haven't stopped drinking for even a day.
I was in inpatient rehab and most people were there for alcohol. Some of them told stories of seizing up. I didnt have a problem then with alcohol.
I work so I havnt found the time to quit yet.
Just woke up from 11 hours of sleep, the weirdest dream and its 6 am on sunday and im starting drinking whiskey already.

I wasted years of my life from heroin. I might have finished college, might have found a career or a stable relationship. I just drink now to remain numb.

Fucking heavy.

A part of the human experience is to do embarrassing shit while you're drunk then wince about it in bed as the memories return to you the next morning.

Why do you feel so guilty?

Yeah i don't think kratom is as dangerous as actual opiods, but you can still become addicted. That's moderation is key for stuff like that, self control can really save you on down the line. Have you ever tried looking at some darknet markets? You can find quality pire DMT and LSD on there for sure. Don't know about coke but theres some on there

I got some bad withdrawals off alcohol like two weeks ago. I just got out of a detox facility because I didn't want to try and taper at home. I was a daily drunk for eight years and about to use my health insurance to go to an out patient program.

Cigarettes and Alcohol.
Was smoking for 15 years, last 10 years around 30 cigs a day. Madness.
Beer for 9 years, where the last 3 years were drunk every night.

Doctor took some bloodtests for my liver, lungs and kidneys, all was normal, no hardcore damage.
I stopped with smoking and drinking 7 days ago, cold turkey. Never felt better.

>pic unrelated

I browsed Silk Road back before it first got busted. The markets looks so promising and I've heard a lot of success stories, but I'm the paranoid type that is afraid of the evil government types kicking down my door and shooting my dog.

I just wish I could get me some 2-3 kilos of kratom and some fat colorado nugs

how did it go

>birth
>break arm at 2
>cool
>don't remember
>skip 3 years
>kindergarten
>sick bro
>everything goes fine
>3rd grade
>oh yeah remember when we let you break your arm lmao sry son
>i dont remeber, i dont care
>5 grade
>trauma
>playing my nintendo DS
>metroid
>brother comes in
>lol why
>molested by my handicapped mentally challenged brother (no penetration, just a lot of humping and weird noise)
>repress
>anxiety
>start doing drugs
>weed is awesome
>lsd is better
>cocaine gives me anxiety
>alcohol is whatever i want it to be
>i like this
>weed goes well when im hammered
>keep drinking
>dont stop
>you should probably stop
>lol nah
>plz
>nah
>a pack a day and bottle if whiskey every night
>plz stop
>too much stress
>drink
>me now: 21
>pretty sure i have lung/throat cancer
>too much anxiety to see a doctor
>like what if im about to die
>still do nothing
>welcome to adulthood

Well said. That's pretty much it. Sometimes I physically have to shake my head, grunt, moan, clench, etc. just based on how cringing at myself makes me feel.

Not really even sure where the guilt comes from. Could be an inferiority complex. For example, one time I was staying at a hotel, was drunk on tequila and shit knows what else. I was buying more beer from a little stall in the hotel. Apparently I hit on this guy (not actually into guys). The next day, I went back to the shop for some gum or something random, and he asked me to hang out sometime. I was hungover as fuck. Had to avoid this guy for a week as he worked there.

The guilt I'd say comes from my shit behavior when I'm drunk. I always have an excuse as to why I can "have another beer" or "it's alright. It's friday. I can drink tonight". Then I end up getting a second flat of beer and passing out for 12 hours. Should be a red flag that I drink by myself.

Something really fucking bad is going to happen before I do the typical human thing and learn my lesson the hard way (via DUI, jail, severe health problem, whatever)

Nah they usually only go after big sellers and it's pretty much impossible for them to prove you bought it if you did get caught, just learn to use tor and bitcoin wallets and you'll be fine. I recommend Alphabay, Dreammarket, and Hansa. All 3 of them have good vendors and you can find quality product. Kratom is legal here in my state so one coukd easily do that, is it illegal in your area?

I am so used to drinking that it doesn't really affect my behavior. Most of my regret and guilt happened years ago. Now I just stay at home like a loser.
My plan to quit is just take 2 weeks off from work next summer and go on a vacation away from alcohol.

alcoholic and druggie, 49 years old, been clean for 5 years.

had a business, wife and kid, lost the business, almost lost the marriage.

took a shittier job and went back to school, now I'm back up on top with career, kid is doing well, marriage is ok (not great but stable).

Realized I have zero interest in things like "social drinking" or "occasional marijuana use". I like to get fucking wasted. Which is something I can't really do any more.

I console myself (when needed) with the certainty that i had way more than my fair share of intense drug/booze experiences (Dead shows, Burning Man, Vegas, Ibiza, etc etc) over my career.

don't go to meetings much any more but AA helped enormously. I'm an atheist btw.

At what stage did the guilt/regret cease? I'm about 3 years into alcoholism. I stay at home like a loser most of the time, too. Rather lay in bed than go out.

Sounds like a solid plan. When you say vacation, do you mean literally?

My state put it in Schedule 1. It takes roughly two hours to drive to my nearest state where I could pick it up.

Alcohol is everywhere. If you drink a lot, go to your GP office. Tell him/her about drinking and you seek help. Best way is detoxing with pro's. It cost you some money (depends on your insurance). But it's less then drinking for another 10 years like you do now.
You admit you have a problem. That's the first step. Go for it. You feel so much better when you are a week sober, then you feel like you are drunk an entire year. Trust me!

>pic unrelated

Learning to check yourself 10mins after every drink is key to drinking at social places.

Just ask yourself, am i drunk enough to bash an ambulance driver? if yes, stop drinking

Shit man that sucks, i knew a few states made it illegal. You can find about anything you want on those markets, but kratom is generally pretty fucking high, atleast from a lot of vendors

it was ok, out of fifteen people I was the only alcoholic. Everyone else was there for heroin and they were all super bitchy about getting their meds. I just took what the doctor gave me and told the nurses when I started shaking and they gave me Librium. Other than that I just ate and watched movies and smoked cigarettes and read Belgarath. They also had people come talk to us. It was a good experience because I couldn't handle the shakes at home.

When I was still drinking, I was constantly busy with getting another drink, to drink on my own paste. My friends were slow drinkers. I had 3 beers when they went for the second one.
I never checked myself, should have done that.

I've been to a few AA meetings, am also atheist. What's your method shaking of the gody vibes that are sent by some members?

And do you think as an addict of your age and experience, an addict can learn to moderate like the rest of the population?

I never stopped feeling guilt, shame etc for things Ive done before. I try to move on and am afraid to visit burnt bridges.

As for vacation. I want to go to a dry town with a beach. I'll try to stay a week maybe just a few days.

I dont want work to know I have a problem. I dont tell anyone I used to shoot heroin.
I just need time off and then maybe I can seek help during that time.

At least you are seeking help ;) In your own way. Quiting a substance is hard, but not impossible. The real deal is staying off. That's why the 'pros' ask why you drink and use stuff. Maybe some trauma and stuff. It helps to know when you have triggers that screams DO IT. Idk, English not my first language btw. Keep it up Sup Forumsro! You will find your way.

>pic unrelated

Tell me about it. Nobody got to have a say in the implementation; the decision was made by the local Department of Health and now my morning tea is as bad as Heroin.

I saw a therapist before becoming an alcoholic. She warned me not to replace my 1 addiction with another and it happened anyway.

When it came to quitting heroin, I tried in patient, out patient, NA an AA and therapists. It was only when I was kicked out of an out patient program and my therapist refused to treat me cause I lied that I decided to quit for myself and probably only stayed sober a month, but never went back for heroin.

Autist too. Am good at understanding business. Am decent programmer. Managed to wiggle my way into a company. Got 4 job offers lying on the table. All that got done while dropping out of college. Use the autist skills you got to your advantage.

That stupid as fuck, I'm glad my state kept it legal. Hopefully you'll get a chance to legalize it soon

Only if you drink a fuxk ton daily. I quit by getting the flu and taking anxiety meds. I feel so much better.

I'm about to go shovel snow drunk at 7 am.

That's the thing, I'm a reverse daywalker. I got the weaknesses but I don't have the strengths. I don't get numbers, I can't program (trust me I tried but I can't even imagine a utility I would want to make), I have zero eye for detail and absolutely no ability to discern a system thouroughly.

But at the same time I'm a social retard, I can't read people, I have no sense of humor and I'm creepy as fuck.

It's tempting to see the world as inherently containing some form justice, that everyone's existence is justified but mine is not. I've been born without talents and potential, just a worthless bit of meat with an approximately 80 year expiring date.

Sucks for you man. I can't imagine what its like not to constantly see patterns.

I think the social retardness goes away if you do the silent guy act. People see it as an achievement if you open up to them then, no more creep. Plus less talking to fuck up with.

You could always (depending on country) if you have an official diagnosis, live off the state from benefits and what not. Over here you can get 2k/a month if you prove you really can't work.

I wouldn't advise it though. You can build yourself into better versions with more skills, work your way up..

Hardly anybody knows what Kratom is around here. Even fewer people would fuck around with nausea dust knowing there are real drugs in the black market. There has been no outcry and there will be no legalization movement without the AKA. Really I just hope the FDA/DEA doesn't screw over the rest of America's freedumbs.

I'd love to just move to the west and get my favorite greens legally whenever I want.
I think those deepweb markets you mentioned would be easier on my wallet though.

High school dronking and partying on the weekends and WoW on the week days. Graduated stop drinking,smoking and cigrattes got very addicted to WoW. 21 first job at a bar droped WoW for drinking partying heavy go on month binders. 23 try cocaine first time loved it. Now 26 cant drink without it but wont touch the stuff sober . Scared thats all iam doing is just replacing on addiction with aouther. Atm drunk as skunk high as kite at a friends house thinking about trying backpage for the first time cause i was to drunk downtown to talk to anyone but idk how my friend will feel about a hooker at his place as i hear him banging his girlfriend next door.

I drink 4 litres of 12% wine every day

Yeah that's how it is with cannabis here, my state doesn't even have medical. I agree that most people would probably just go for actual opiods or amphetamines than kratom. I like kratom just because it is more natural and i don't feel like im going to really get addicted again. Those markets are definetly worth a look, where i get my weed and psychedelics. They have some damn good prices on most stuff

I am on benefits, sadly they somehow expect me to magically be able to find a job in two years anyway. By that time I'll probably be working alongside downies or something and living with my parents again. Right now I recieve about €815 per month, more is sadly impossible.

I tried learning skills, didn't work out. I am not joking when I say I'm worthless, I literally am.

Even when I'm silent it's just apparent I'm deeply and inherently not supposed to be here, it's palpable.

The best version of me is dead, but suicide tends to put a lot of strain on the people around you, so I try to abstain.

I don't think I can learn to moderate, I'm sure some other people can.

I think it's very obvious that other people's belief in a higher power is very effective. For me I just decided that the collective of humans in AA was the higher power -- they knew more than me about how to get sober. I definitely "went with it" and wasn't militant about atheism, but I came out the other end still atheist.

They talk about agnostics a lot in AA -- I'm not even that, I'm atheist.

i'm in NYC so this is perfectly normal and accepted in AA here. I hear it's much more religious in other places.

I don't think you should really call a hooker over to your friend's house without consulting him first dude

I drink about half a liter or more of whiskey everyday. About 10-20 drinks a day. I suppose its not as bad as alcoholics can get.

you could go to an AA meeting today and I bet you could get through a whole day without drinking after that

Also bought my dream car last year got speeding ticket going 110 blew it off since it was in a differnt county license got suespended got pulled over for suespended license also got dui that night vlew.25 but never got license back cause i rather spend 400 every weekend partying then getting my license back. Also sorta live at my dads other house so technically i live with my parents at 27

Or maybe it is bad. I read that chart wrong. Weekly I consume about 100 drinks.

everyone is built different.

i once was in a detox unit without a guy who drank the bottle of hand soap that nurses use before they handle their patients.

he didn't even die. i shared room with him for the next 7 days, and he didn't ever wake up lol. fucking champion

Would never go through with plus my dick never works when iam on the shit just gets you going.

you drink like that so you can be unhappy, not because of it. ego preservation mufuck, stop taking the path of least resistance

I heard a story about someone doing that when he was detoxing. He would put the hand soap in cups and hide them under his bed. I would never get that bad.

Completely dependent on a nightly cocktail of prescription medication and over the counter pills, just to get to sleep at night.

Been this way for years. Chronic insomniac. If I don't take all the shit, I don't sleep, so I continue to take the shit.

I just worry about the day my doctors retire and I won't be able to find any other docs willing to prescribe such high dosages of sedatives. Then I will probably kill myself.

genius.

this particular guy, it was like 2am he and he was just getting admitted and i'm like 3 days into my detox. he's in the bed next to me and he's rambliing shit about the emu war or something. i'm listening in caution cause this cunt is 3 meters away from me, all of a sudden he gets out of bed, and just runs to the soap container (99% alcohol, this was not his first rodeo). I was fucked up with anxiety from withdrawals and decided to just watch, to see if this 50+ year old man was just doing it for attention. nope. he necked an entire bottle of hospital grade antiseptic then continued to my booth's antiseptic where i slapped the bottle out of his hand and explained YOU WILL DIE IF YOU DRINK THIS IDIOT. I then went into the halls calling for nurses, i explained the situation, and they thanked me lol. no more anti septic hand cleaner in my room for the next 3 days

addict to life in general.
It's a reality everyone wants to deny
Worldy creation
I loath in pain daily.

snitches get stitches

no really, how did he react?

Rehab was a hell of an experience for me, nothing crazy like that.
I dreamed about rehab. It was a place you could leave of your own free will, but outside the world was in ruin. I always wanted to write a story about that dream.

I didnt like how so many people were still in party mode there. I admitted myself and most others were there for court or legal issues.
So many girls were there too. I got 1 girls number, but i relapsed once I got out and never saw her again.

he was like halfway suicidal mode pouring the liquid into his mouth, i grabbed it off him took it to the nurses and explained to them wtf he did.

returned to the room and he was drunkenly thanking me lol. was hilarious.

my roommate before him was an old man who died of goul bladder cancer or something, shit was fucked. ui heard the doctors behind the curtain telling this cunt that he was fucked and shit.

i have heaps more fucked up detox room mate stories btw

IV heroin addict here. Currently in a chill as fuck rehab (got my own appartment, can chill most of the days etc). I suppose you can say I'm also addicted to alcohol, weed and other opiates/opioids, but heroin is my drug of choice. Don't know how long I'll stay here, but some patients here have stayed for more than a year, and since I use heavier drugs than them I suppose I'll be here just as long (not complaining though, love this place). The only problem is that I'm not really that willing to quit, and I know I'll use/abuse again in the future. In fact, I'm waiting on a heroin delivery to arrive any day now.

yo you'e in the worst rehab in the solar system

I was the same until I was kicked out of all the treatment programs. I had fake urine even so I Was passing drug tests, but was caught by family who was super invasive.
I decided to quit by myself when I wasnt getting help anymore.

Please feel free to share, I love stories like that.

How can someone be addicted to something and still think he or she is worth anything ?

nice digits.
I abuse psychedelic substances to feel normal because of my schizophrenia.

depressing story.
>I'm in detox, hospital unit
>share room with man with dementia
>he's very nice, but tries to get out of bed a lot
>he has a piss bag he isn't aware of
>nearly every sleepless night I have to redirect him back to his bed during my detox
>he keeps asking when his son will visit
>day2(for me) his son and his wife come to visit
>they stay beyond the curtain for around 3 hours
>they are lovely; son and daughter in law are the nicest people
>they leave to go home
>a few hours later
>dementia man is ask when his son and daughter in law are going to visit
>try not to cry
>cry alot
>2am
>he's asking for his son, and when he will visit
>cry a lot

It was so sad

As a rehab, yes, it sucks balls, but as I still want to get high this place is heaven. Most of the employes are incompetent and getting drugs are easy as fuck since I'm all alone in my apartment most of the day. In the first couple of days me and another patient smoked weed on my balcony, lmao.

Fake urine is a fucking savior, I use it myself. If I just had enough money/drugs I could probably walk around high all day, leave (fake) negative tests and they would probably not even notice.

Fuck me, right in the feels. Good of you to actually give a shit and helping though, in the middle of a detox and all.

oddly enough i really wish i could drink
i mean i can hold my liquor better than any one i know
but i fucking hate drinking, having to ingest large quantities of anything in order to feel something hardly enjoyable only to end up feeling like shit the next day

weed on the other hand just seems to work really well with my body
it suppresses my appetite and boosts my metabolism
lost 55lbs in the last 2 months
needless to say i feel fucking fantasic

I have another story for the gentleman who was scheduled to die a within a week who was my room mate.

Ay fuck, that's heavy. Let's get some feels in this junkie thread.

>be me
>college faggot
>wanna be a teacher
>doing well
>just need to complete my student-teaching internship
>get placed in terrible school with terrible mentor teachers
>trying really hard but they hate me for some reason
>tell me I'm going to fail
>this_sucks.gif
>have to walk away from internship
>drop out
>super depressed
>I tried so harddddd and got so farrrr
>start working part time
>spend all my money on prescription pain killers
>start doing the heroins
>was a total junkball for 3 years
>wake up one morning broke and hopeless
>time to clean up my act
>go down to the methadone clinic
>dat slow taper
>re-enroll in school
>student teaching round 2
>great school
>great mentor teacher
>pass
>graduate
>am now a teacher
>mfw I somehow managed to get where I was going all along

Bump for interest. I have addiction to nicotine caffeine and weed. I am worried about my friends who have started doing stronger drugs ie. opiates. I had normal childhood and soon will start to study again.

>3rd detox
>hospital unit
>my room mate gets the window room
>curtain never ever reveals him, very private man
>we're room mates for 3 days
>morning comes. my doctor (and 2 nurses) skip me and walk to the window bed
>curtain pulled further
>"hello mr XXXX, well the results from the chemo have come back
>and from the start you asked us to be blunt
>it's not working, you don't have much longer to go
(iirc it was pancreatic cancer)
>I was like what the FUCK so i don't remember the rest of the prognosis.
>I remember he was like, "damn, lol. fuck well better tell the family" < his attidude
>that night
>my room mate
>2am
>massing groaning pains
>I hadn't spoke to him before
>I say some things like "You're a very brave man, you've probably had a good run compared to most, you're so resilient; etc.
>he never responds, not even an attempt :(
>man is moved to another room to die so i don't have to be subjected to his death while i detox
>rip room mate

Cool story bro. I wish i will accomplish something in my life, too.

I had a dementia patient share a hospital room with me too
>3 am
>someone comes in
>"Hi there Mr. G. I'm just here to check for gold. It will be a minute"
>dementia guy is barely awake
>Hear sudden howling
>"No gold there. Carry on"
>lie awake every night afraid some doctor is going to wake me up by putting his hand up my ass

If I can do it, my God... anyone can do it. But I have to be honest with myself; a lot of it was luck. If I had gotten arrested, any prospects of teaching would have been over.

Sometimes on my way into school I'll drive by a few of the places where I used to score drugs, meet my dealers or park my car to shoot up real quick, and I'll think... "did that shit really happen? I really did that shit?" It's a weird feeling.

how do you fail to become a teacher?

joking, good on you for getting clean and achieving your goal

I tried going back to school this past fall and I flunked out.
I havnt cleaned my act up enough. I'd get done work and try to work on school, but its so hard to be formal.
I gave up on getting a BA but might go into a trade.

>park my car to shoot up real quick
do you still use?

No. I'm a teacher. I've been clean for a few years now.

Kek thanks bro

A trade isn't a bad idea. But you really do need to get your shit together competely before you attempt anything like school or a trade. There's really no half-assing sobriety.

Yeah I know now.
I thought I could do it cause last year I was working a lot of hours and there were days I hardly drank, though it was still daily.
When it comes to school its harder to motivate yourself than it is when you are being paid and instructed at a job.

I could get a career at my current work place, but its like 50-60 hour work weeks and I'm not ready.
I could also try school again, but a different university and a different major. I tried music majoring at a business school thinking itd be easy.

Addiction never stopped me from being functional, except the risks I was lucky to dodge.

It's tough, man, but don't give up. Just keep plugging away.

27 now, spent around the last 10 years addicted to something. It's true that you just end up swapping one for another. First sex. Serial cheater, wouldn't even wash the dick between girlfriend and side girls. And vidya around the same time. Totally stuck on it for 10+ hours a day til I dropped out of University, thank god stopped wasting my time on WoW. And some weed. Four years spending up to $280 a week chopping bowl after bowl after bowl. And then benzos and booze. First time experiencing a fully mobile blackout vengeance trip. Very almost died doing stupid shit on drugs. Finally now hooked on opiates. Haven't touched H but literally all the rest has been ticked off the bucket list, even a little stint with DMT. Except Ketamine. Got some last week from a mate. Hopefully use it as a wake up call snap me out and away from the opiate body high circle.

I did also smoke cigarettes for like three years and that did more damage than all of the above. Been off them for 6 months now and still haven't got my lung capacity back to where it was. Get puffed out having sex. Just lying down to sleep at night is like a stack of bricks on my chest. Fuck tobacco. Gonna go jogging more to git fit again. Or die of a heart attack. Who knows..

cigarettes do exposes you to more radioactive atoms than anything

i feel u
i am so lost. im pretty sure the best moments of my life have already come and gone, and they weren't very good to begin with.

lel my dentist has a chart saying how mundane things are radioactive and a pack and a half a day is just below the allowed amount of radiation exposure a year.
My mom has smoked for 50 years and hasnt had problems yet. For me, I just have bad cardio, but since I exercise a lot it counter acts a bit.
My family never had cancer so I'd be the first.

it would mean a lot if someone could save this or screen cap it so maybe one day shell see this. message in a bottle.

tantri i have never felt anything so warm and healthy as when we started falling in love. i remember breaking down together in such furious tears that day we were making love together, im so sorry you had to watch your beautiful thing die. im so sorry im writing this. its like a terrible dream now, honestly i fear sometimes i may already be dead, and im simply stuck in the gap between dimensions, the echoe of my life as a personal hell. tantri i love you so much and i hope that you forget me, i pray that you find a good man. god im sorry.

My ex while I was shooting H was just as toxic as the drug itself. Glad we went our separate ways, but they both still haunt me.

I managed to stay with my girlfriend but our trajectory was a little different.

I dated her for, oh, 5 years before we both started doing drugs... so we had a baseline to go back to after getting clean together, if that makes sense.

Pussy addict here.

I have read this story a few times on here, good on you for giving others hope

CP addict here.

Yeah I've posted it a lot. I uh... probably spend too much time on here.

This scares me so much. I know I have a highly addictive personality so i never touch drugs other than caffiene and occasional booze. I think i'm probably addicted to food though since im a fat fuck