How many Sup Forumsros out there are depressed?

How many Sup Forumsros out there are depressed?

Never really considered suicide for a long time but after near-missing several opportunities that might've made my life great (new bigger college and going to live in Colorado leaving my hometown) I've basically given up on the universe looking out for me for being a good person or good karma.

I'm pretty sure bad karma exists judging from my personal experience but fuck dude, that sense of inevitability to change nor the drive to do so is incapacitating.

Have any of you overcome this and please no retarded platitudes like suicide is never the answer or hang in there buddy things will get better if you have no experience of what you're talking about.

People say that shit but it usually comes from privileged people who have easy lives.

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meant to say inability not inevitability*

Lifes a cycle man. Ups and downs.

Some people need to reach rock bottom before they see the beauty in life but let me tell you brother it's there. There's beauty in everything, this worlds a great place to live in despite media and society telling you otherwise.

It's all just chemicals in your brain man, the wiring is funky. You'll be back to normal, shit will get better. I promise

thanks man I appreciate it.

It's all good brother I've been there. I happen to be one of those people that needed rock bottom to see the beauty. I really hope I can save you the trouble... Lifes too short to spend it unhappy

I know you've probably got some cognitive dissonance right now but just keep at it. Treat yourself well, set and accomplish goals, and you'll be back to your old self in no time.

Feeling the same.

If you're gonna kill yourself then just do it.

idk just seems like every time I get my hopes up and put in lots of work to change or make an improvement it comes crashing down.

My family is toxic as fuck and I'm just witnessing more and more of my free time decrease as responsibility increases.

So I just want to spend time to myself, centering myself and then wonder why I don't have any friends or any social life, not like I really had much of one to begin with tho..

It's not so much the circumstances but the feeling like I have no way out that bothers me.

medication and therapy.

20 years of PTSD and chronic cyclical depression. Recently, started getting 'really' serious about downing a bottle of pills, so I finally talked to someone.

Now, I'm on meds and talking to someone twice a month about past shit.

The human brain likes to find patterns in everything, even your failures. I can't speak on the responsibility thing cus I'm a fuck up neet, but if you're able to make yourself a member of society you should be proud... You're helping people every single paycheck with your taxes

Pretty much the same on the social life thing too, but my social success while I was actually fucking working (i.e. total fucking success, popular, dating my fucking 9/10 supervisor as unbelievable as it sounds) gives me hope that I'll get back there some day. I don't doubt you're capable of the same.

Don't feed the helpless feelings. You aren't helpless. You're more capable than me, man.

...

...

...

thinking karma is the reason you went though some shits, in order to take away some of the guilt you feel is kinda weak, its your fault but it just happened thats unlucky w/e

why would the universe look out for you lol you have absolutly no worth, just like everyone and everything else, the only worth and value there is to things or people is the one you believe there is, or the one people around you give to them

suicide is not the answer, but death is, its the only thing that will solve all your problems, in the meantime you might as well do your best with your life, cause its literally all you got

nothing will happen and make things better, some shits might cover up the despair you're dealing with for a random amount of time but it wont go away by itself, you have to deal with it

i dont know shit about you so i cant rly help but you dont need me or anyone else, you just think you're too weak to deal with that shit alone but its just what you are trying to convice yourself because you're too fucking lazy to make a change by yourself

grow the fuck up

I'm with you dude, for some reason I only get a boner from being dominated by feet of girls. No girl likes that shit. I want a family some day. I wish I would've been normal. I would be better off dead.

>How many Sup Forumsros out there are depressed?

Chronically depressed since a child.

>Never really considered suicide for a long time but after near-missing several opportunities that might've made my life great (new bigger college and going to live in Colorado leaving my hometown) I've basically given up on the universe looking out for me for being a good person or good karma.

Why? The Universal Karma machine has given you opportunities in the past to make your life better, what makes you think it will not do so in the future?

>I'm pretty sure bad karma exists
>the sense to change and the drive to do so is incapacitating.

I know that feel.

>Have any of you overcome this and please no retarded platitudes like suicide is never the answer or hang in there buddy things will get better if you have no experience of what you're talking about.

Nope. I'm 27 and I have been through therapy with a psych. after a really bad and failed suicide attempts starting from childhood.

It never leaves you, you're never alone, you'll always have this black monkey on your back that won't let you form meaningful relationships and pushes people away.

No happy endings for people who are chronically depressed from cradle to grave.

hopes are expectations and dreams, you make it for yourself out there. If there is a God hope it is just

I mean you're probably right.
I come from a christian family (we don't go to church or anything but I still hear the whole positive thinking and good karma + heaven stuff) so I mean I *try* to think that people have a purpose or that things work themselves out if you're a good and honest person but when I was younger I used to just be dishonest and be brutally realistic and get what I wanted even at the expense of others so I felt bad and started believing in positive stuff and try to be better.

Honestly though, I think I was right the first time, only I don't want to be a dick.

I could put more effort in into changing for sure you're right about that.

>It never leaves you, you're never alone,
>No happy endings for people who are chronically depressed from cradle to grave.

this actually made me happy for some reason. Accepting harsh truth is actually much more satisfying then trying to delude myself with positive thoughts without any evidence of change. Then again, the user earlier talking about cognitive dissonance might be right also. who knows.

Do you guys consider weed an anti depressant? I don't want to be on actual anti depressant meds and I'm too poor to seek help, things seemed to get better though when I smoked sativa strains in moderation over the weekends and exercised. Is weed a good anti depressant or am I just doing what alcoholics call drowning their problems?

>that sense of inevitability to change nor the drive to do so is incapacitating
I get this all the time, but i'm trying my best to counter it.
If anything, weed has been helping me a lot, i tend to imagine a lot of stuff when i'm high and recently i got the idea of cosplaying with my sister and now we're on a training program, so i have someone on my side to keep me up and not fall into this same feeling again.
Try to do something similar with a friend, not cosplaying but rather doing something with someone who won't let you down and will motivate you to do stuff.

>forming a codependent relationship for self worth and mental wellness

Yeah, that's not going to end badly at all.

Great Advice my friend.

Hedonism is a way of life for a reason bruh. If the draw of pleasure is your driving factor then so be it. You've now found purpose

FUCK no. Using bud to cope makes everything worse. You'll get to the point where the only thing that makes you happy is weed, you'll look at it as some sort of savior but it's cus of mental dependence.

Herb doesn't fix your problems. It just makes you feel like you can, for about thirty minutes. Then you're sober, then you're back to the same old shit. I'm a fuckin dyed in the wool pothead please trust me.

OP here again,

weed makes me philosophical and I notice things that I normally don't. I'm pretty sure a major cause of my issues is just neurotransmitter deficiencies (i'm really low dopamine for one thing) and it makes me really focused and "present" or a meditative like state which is good for turning off thoughts but not necessarily making me happier.

I researched for college a bit and found out that it actually changes the grey matter in your brain so I stopped smoking aside from a couple of times the past week for over half a year about.

Overall, it's pretty nice for a one-off time here and there but I wouldn't do it everyday personally.

as long as its not a crutch, that holds you back. get our there and earn your way. make friends to get high with, and always make sure you can afford it, and realize its just a plant that adjusts chemicals in your brain you already have some control over. Its all within and you dont have to stress anything, We are all just decaying bodies on a rock hurtling through space in a mysterious reality.

>this actually made me happy
How long have you been depresses? You say that you're too poor to seek help, but have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness?

A lot of people who are chronically depressed seek out situations and outcomes and things in general that intensify the depression/depressed feelings and like feeling that way. It's the only way some of us know how to live.

>Accepting harsh truth is actually much more satisfying then trying to delude myself
Yeah, but it also smothers me at times.

>the user earlier talking about cognitive dissonance might be right also. who knows.

Indeed.
>Do you guys consider weed an anti depressant?

The mentally ill should never take drugs. We're fucked in the head as it is already, why put yourself in an even more fucked up state of chemical imbalance?

im not depressed. just stop giving a fuck

I've never been to a psychologist or whatever to be diagnosed.

Based on what I've read I might be a narcissist but then again that's my whole generation (and family).

Does it really make a difference to even know? I feel like all that would happen is they give me some sort of diagnosis then I either take pills or do cognitive behavioral therapy or some shit.

Unless I was bipolar or something I don't think i'd need medication.

>Does it really make a difference to even know?
Short answer is No.

You forget to appreciate the things you have and being able to exist. Most people including my self convince themselves under the surface of thoughts that there is afterlife beyond this current existence... being my self close to death (died for 3 mins) I realized that after life there is nothing, and having the priveledge to experience the natural order of something is very much worth it to keep seeing things, something is better than absolut nothing, in fact were all going to be in the void, forever without re experiencing what were experiencing now

Beautiful

you're giving me an existential crisis

hey man ill tell you right now im in some shit. currently im in the army and i feel fucking trapped.
I understand your situation is shitty and you feel bad because you seemingly have opportunities to change and loose them.
in my case however i physically cant change then and have no control over my life for the next 3 years. currently im in a line
combat unit and I am embarrased and degraded on a daily basis, forced to do exercises until I physically and mentally break every
day because my sergeants and command exude rage from awful PTSD and take it out on us, I wake up every day with dread but I have
learned one invaluable thing from it all. You have to drop all feelings and simply process your ambitions in a straight and mathematical sense.
otherwise you will be consumed my the suck, embrace the suck and be unbreakable because we both know the world dont give a fuck about
you or your feelings. if you do not learn how to kick every days ass the day will own you like an exhausted slave. I understand you may feel
helpless, and I have for such a long time but I can guarantee you if you ease into a Juggernaut mentality you will break any chains you are
constrained by.

thing with bipolarity is that (unless you keep some kind of journal of how you feel) you're not able to know if you are bipolar by yourself, cause it just changes the perception of how you felt before and how you are feeling now, its kinda weird lol

you should check for "high potential" ( just read some stuffs about it ), the way you feel and the "when I was younger I used to just be dishonest and be brutally realistic and get what I wanted even at the expense of others so I felt bad and started believing in positive stuff and try to be better" sounds a lot like how i was feeling before realizing everything was just a matter of point of view, and that mine was the only one that rly mattered

Been depressed so long I can't even remember the last time i was actually happy.
I'm 23 and it feels like my lifes this dying machine thats slowly been winding down to halt for the past decade. Doctors for a good long while were damn sure it was PTSD related but the psychs and therapists eliminated that and settled on clinical depression pretty quickly.
Can't tell you how many opportunities i've had to let life do the dirty work but my body moves or it just never happens and the next day its back to the same shit.
If I didn't work i wouldn't know exactly when the weekday ended or the weekend began. If my family didn't call me up every year I wouldn't know when my birthday was. I've ran on autopilot for so long i'm not even sure i could live any other way now.
I can't even take pills that are supposed to make it better because even the smallest effective dose leads to crippling side effects or dope me up so much basic functioning is impossible do to some fuckery of my metabolism.

LISTEN UP FAGGOT

youre depressed cause you always take the easy way in life

its easy as shit to pick out negatives and things you dont like

quit being a fucking pussy lazy bitch. challenge yourself to find the good you fucking loser. quit being a FUCKING LAZY PUSSY. YOU'RE LAZY. NEGATIVITY IS EASY AS SHIT. YOU'RE TAKING THE EASY ROAD ALL THE TIME AND ARE NOT FULFILLING YOURSELF. NO SHIT YOU'RRE DEPRESSED.

fucking challenge yourself or kill yourself you pathetic, white, privelidged, peice of shit. You have running water, food, shelter, and the god damn internet (entire libraries of works) at your fucking fingertips and you bitch about your life? fucking kill yourself.

There will always be better moments, even if they only last a few seconds.

But i get told this alot and nothing ever changes though man...shit fucking hurts...

>fucking challenge yourself or kill yourself you pathetic, white, privelidged, peice of shit.

Meh. -1/10

Chill this is what it is whether your in your late 30s or on ur death bed. to her, extinction is the drama this is what user fails to see
Only now once you realize being a whore isn't cool after ignoring every warning your gunna guilt talk i'm so privileged and selfish to not carry on the race your scum stay dead!!

I have Bipolar disorder. I'll be killing myself once my daughter is grown.

Bob Ross/10

Waiting on the good times.

OP here,

I've been thinking really hard and honestly doesn't the whole "you decide the way you see things" stuff just sound (based on life experience) like absolute shit.

I went through philosophy read kant and heard this shit at home, but when I really think about it, it is the positive ends that make me happy, not the means.

Sure, every once in a while something trivial can happen that's amazing, but it's usually with another person.

The actual reframe-stuff-to-be-positive actually makes me more depressed.

what do you guys think? and also don't take me too seriously i am sad and drunk after all.

>going to the void anyways
keep the swag boiis. don't just raise a whore you know what would happen.

About a year ago and a half ago the girl I dated since 6th grade(I'm 27 now) up and left me for no reason to "work on herself before we progressed further" bullshit reason. I know she was done cause she was done, I saw and felt it coming on for months. Changes In attitude towards me. Physical affection flew completely out of the window. That really fucking brought my life to a slamming halt. About a month after that out of nowhere 10 or so police officers came pretty much kicking my door down. Said they had received a call I had a gun and was in the process of shooting myself. Said I had called my ex and told her I was done and was making noises with the gun over the phone telling her I was about to shoot myself. This never happened, had not had a conversation with her since she left. She convinced all my friends that I was crazy, kept her trapped in the relationship with fear and death threats. Again, never happened. No one believes me because she is legit an academy award worthy victim player/actress. Literally have not received a text from anyone in months, no FB messages, nothing, no phone calls. I literally have no one. Family lives on the other side of the country. Haven't left my house other to go work a shit cubicle job in months. 8 mgs a klonopin every night just to get maybe 2 hours of sleep. My life has become a constant struggle to keep pressing. But it's hard to when you realize all you would need to do is take a bottle of pain meds you got from a surgery a few months back and your RXd benzos for anxiety and wash them all down with an extra large cup of bourbon. It would probably be weeks before anyone even realized you were gone.

I'm depressed because a guy chose to drink and drive back in '98 leading to a head injury in baby-user that now means i live with almost lethally reduced levels of serotonin and for some reason i can't properly metabolize the replacement pills.

No, you won't be.

People with bipolar disorder can have highs and lows that last for months on end. You're in a low right now, 6 months from now, maybe even tomorrow, you'll be out sucking the fresh air up those squirrely little fucking happy nostrils of yours on cloud 9.

Fucking bipolar fags.

How old are you user? I'd guess younger than 20? It took me a solid 25 years to learn this lesson, from when I was born to now.

It took vocal suicidal thoughts to snap me back into reality. It took my career being stolen from me with false domestic violence charges. It took practically my entire family disowning me to realize this. It took multiple near death experiences from dugs. It took dumping every single friend I had because they were thieves and druggies and liars.

You don't know shit user. If I can find beauty in this reality then you can.

sorry about that user :/

I hope if souls do exist that yours enjoys bliss for eternity.

>Sure, every once in a while something trivial can happen that's amazing, but it's usually with another person.

There's your problem. You lack Human interaction/relationships. Some people need those like a parasite needs its host to survive. There's nothing wrong with it.

>Schizophrenic user

I wish it was that simple.

you're like a bird yellow at a dog because he's "too lazy to fly lmao"

you have nothing other than your insignificant knowledge and capacity to understand what another person is going through to judge the degree of his despair and his capacity of dealing with it

goes the other way around, he has no way to know if whats he's going though is "normal", if other people are just "stronger" than him, if he has to deal with way harder shits

any ways ye i do agree with you, he's in a situation where is "master of his own destiny", maybe its 50 times harder for him than for other people, maybe its 10 times easier but he's a lazy retarded fucktard, we have no way to know, but he has the card in hands

What did you do to her? Not trying to discredit your post but it takes a monster to do what she did. Was she a monster before you dated her?

Were there any signs whatsoever that this manipulation was incoming? Asking to look out for my own hide.

Yeah but that's why I was saying I don't know how to change.

When I was young I was extroverted but after being outcasted in highschool I was forced to introspect and live the introverted life.

I think some part of me deep down still is an extrovert waiting to be the life of the party but I hate myself too much and my family is too dominating to let me feel that way.

I want to change and have met people who have changed but the way he did was by approaching 1000s of girls because he got into pickup.

Thing is, I already was extremely motivated at one point in my life but I burnt out after hundreds of hours of "self development" that led to 0 change.

anyways sorry for the wall of bitchy text.

Do shrooms

>you're like a bird yellow at a dog because he's "too lazy to fly lmao"

I honestly did nothing at all. She was always a huge party girl, drinking till blacking out, would do nearly anything that was powdery if it was offered to her. I grew out of that lifestyle and suggested perhaps it was time for her to slow down. After a very long conversation that's when things started going downhill.

>I hate myself too much and my family is too dominating to let me feel that way.

Both of those things are related.

>I want to change and have met people who have changed but the way he did was by approaching 1000s of girls because he got into pickup.

Masking your problems with sex doesn't help. It makes things worse with every empty sexual encounter you have.

You should honestly get her back..

that's unforgivable.

Eh, anything I do to "get her back" would just exacerbate the claims of my unstable mental state. She would jump at the chance to use it as an example, and it would only help to prove her right.

That's not honest with yourself or me, man. You're ignoring how you set yourself up as a victim... those relationships you lost weren't concrete to begin with if they won't speak to you.

And your relationship with her.. how deep of a connection did you actually have?

I'm the same way, find it difficult to have meaningful relationships with anyone. Hard to get people on my side. But it's because I'm hedonistic and selfish. At least I accept it.

yelling
you got the point ( someone who can do something really easily blaming someone who is unable to ) you fucktard you're old enough to connect the dots

I mean isn't the question "how deep of a connection did you actually have?" a subjective one? I could say the deepest, she could say, none at all. But for the first few years, we had the same ambitions, we traveled the US and were saving to start doing some international travel. Things were, for a very long time, solid and meaningful. I assume she met someone else and I just never found out about it

>>you're like a bird yellow at a dog because he's "too lazy to fly lmao"

>I meant YELLING

>>>you're like a bird YELLING at a dog because he's "too lazy to fly lmao"

>>Dog's
>>Flying

There's plenty of ways to do stuff anonymously..

Most people think in terms of messing with them in ways that are easily linked to a person: smashing a mailbox, slashing tires etc.

instead of doing something physical and obvious you could do something ambiguous and maybe not directly noticeable.

eh, well whatever, messing with someone who messed with me is how i got bad karma so actually forget what i said.

Yes, it's based on your understanding of what connections are. But I'm speaking to you as if you understand how to actually judge it, telling you that you don't know what the hell you're talking about isn't going to help. I'm trying to pick your brain

if "nothing at all" means you didnt harm her or anything, then you shared your life for years with someone who deep down didnt give a shit about you without realizing it, thats not "nothing at all"

>when you try to shitpost and actually make yourself look retarded

Not saying I want you to give me examples because I want revenge

But I want you to give me examples because I want revenge. Gonna find solutions whether you tell me or not, might as well give me some ammo.

>About a year ago and a half ago the girl I dated since 6th grade(I'm 27 now) up and left me for no reason

>>her reason was to work on herself

>no reason
>bullshit reason

>I honestly did nothing at all.

>the first few years, we had the same ambitions, we traveled the US and were saving to start doing some international travel.

You're pretty much just mentally unstable friendo

>Not catching that birds dont yell and can't speak bjork
>continuing your autistic rampage

hmmm..
if she takes any pills you can replace them in the bottle, especially larger white pills that don't have markings like magnesium supplements.

perhaps testosterone supplements or something.

um, you could drain all the oil out of her car so that when she drives it will break down and fry her car and she will think it's something she forgot to do or that it was leaking or something.

check out the "anarchist cookbook" on piratebay it has stuffs

probably avoid the social retaliation route unless you know what you're doing. maybe you can't convince her friends but your good friends should be on your side.

Poke holes in her condoms, sabotage her birth control with other pills or by ruining her original ones.

um, unscrew the bolts partially on one of her tires so it comes off randomly while she's driving (that happened to me when someone tried to steal my truck)

put weed in her house and have someone else call the cops and tell them you saw her selling and that it's in that place (bonus points for a large amount)

install a RAT on her computer and send sensitive information to people on facebook or hack her facebook with the keylogger.

you get the idea..

that was the other guy you're referring to, I just chimed in because you actually didn't understand the analogy or you were baiting you were a retard.

>My MPD just took over. Now my name is Sandra and I should defend what my Faggetta said.

I'm not the user who got manipulated but I'm sure he appreciates it

Seems like almost all your means of sabotage require an active friendship with the person.

Anything else for someone who's house you don't have access to?

I used to suffer from awful depression alot. It seemed to go away as soon as I turned 30. Really user, sometimes waiting makes sense.

Egging on the school shooter
>never change Sup Forums

More like vindictive rage to people who stole from me or hurt me in one way or the other. Useful for future encounters too. Why the fuck does this equate to school shooter to you?

I mean most people are dumb dude.

they probably have a spare key 5ft away from the door if its a house.

I don't condone any of this but if he was socially savvy he could just defend himself in front of everyone but I get how hard that is.

I know girls that are so good at manipulating men that they could pull shit off like this and you would have 0 chance of defending yourself.

Because if guys act dramatic or dishonest it gets quelled by others for being a bitch or whiny. If a girl does it it makes her "spunky" or they say shit like "you go girl."

I hate bitches like that.

You all know them, whether or not you know they are pathological liars.

They get smashed and passed by the only dudes abundant enough with girls to treat them like how they actually deserve to be treated (not all girls deserve this mind you, just these sadistic sophists) and then treat guys who treat them well like this poor fella.

It's up to him to let the universe handle things or not but if he asks ill give him some pointers.

All I did to the girl I'm referring to is dox her on Sup Forums.

Which I wouldnt recommend btw.

Not that fun of an idea + anons ruin it.

But yeah if you can just handle it socially but if people have already distrusted you and will not listen to your reasoning, then degrade her social value and put her on the defensive or make something happen.

I always thought it was really fucked but if you could find some way to give her mercury in her daily routine you'd fuck her up for life.

I don't know if i'd recommend that but maybe if you got some powdered mercury and diluted some into her water bottle or coffee mix that might work.

lmao and btw I do not condone any of this this is purely for education and fantasy ;)

>I know girls that are so good at manipulating men that they could pull shit off like this and you would have 0 chance of defending yourself.
Fuck dude this is too real. I'm this faggot and my mothers the manipulative cunt that screwed my career by filing false charges and convincing everyone I was abusive.

The fuckin world did not prepare me for this shit. How the fuck can people turn like this? That user had his social life ruined, I had my career and family connections ruined, how the fuck was I not aware this could happen?

Fuck man. Too real. Too fucking real.

There's some really terrifying things in this post.

Stop being a pussy, get in shape and join the military. You can have a good excuse ignore shit like women and job worries, and just live your job for a few years.

If you are actually considering suicide, then you should join, if not, then fuck off you attention whore.

i mean, based on personal experience i've come a conclusion.

Girls have two personalities, one for how they deal with everyone (the nice, always courteous, charming and vibrant persona) and how they deal with people they're attracted to or mad with or know on a deeper level where they don't have to front.

Guys have fronts too, but they obey social norms and rules of politeness.

Women act polite, but they take what they want, even at the expense of others and do it right to your face without remorse or apology and just find some bs excuse to justify it.

it doesn't even have to make sense
>sorry I know i'm being weird but you got to sit over there haha no seriously, I know I know I'm so bossy HAHA but yeah..... thanks!
if you try to defend yourself they just politely make fun of you or do more ad hominem's to your face disguised as a joke. Politeness dictates you laugh at your own expense or you're "up tight."

There's so many games and I've seen them all, and that's just the shit that happens in front of everyone, not what user experienced.

but the other side of girls is the real side, she will genuinely express her wants, emotions and whatever with people who she doesn't have to front around.

but girls RARELY honestly express what they actually think or feel, instead they like to gather info about you and not give out anything personal.

The only good solution (which is hard to do) is if you are a complete-package guy or have something they *need*. they will be on their best behavior around you and would not think of betraying you, they will do whatever you want.

I don't want this from a girl because it feels wrong but if you keep them on a loop by dangling shiny objects in their face that's how they're naturally designed to function, they will get competitive and some may try to screw you over if it's value that doesn't stem from attraction.

I think it's because girls are evolutionarily are made to find the best man and get his resources.

but im permanently disqualified from joining the military. what do?

I wouldn't actually do any of this, I'm just trying to creatively give some ways user can get revenge back. And btw don't do the mercury thing, that's like if someone murdered your family or something that's not childs play.

i don't think your problem is that girls are shit. Its that you're a pussy and so you let woman who are barely alpha at all by society standards dominate over your weak beta ass. Man up, you worthless sack of shit!

Pay a pretty hooker to pretend she loves you and cares about you.

Partially. The other part is that I just don't like to play games and get caught up into all that bs. i just walk away from people like that.

well, thats probably for the best. It'd be better however if you became the alpha and forced the shitty girls that play games to stop playing games and to beg for your cock. Though only chads can do that.

...

You're gonna turn me into a fuckin misogynist and I'm not even kidding. It's one of those things that's always been there but I've overlooked it or accepted it as a way of life. I never once considered it could and would be taken to this degree... Fuckin too real man

So what, just wolf it up too? That's the conclusion I'm slowly reaching, if I don't roll in the dirt I fall behind. I don't want to be a shitty manipulative person but I know I'm capable of it. And it's felt like being honest and kind has gotten me nowhere for years.

Life's fucked up.

yeah that's what i'm trying to learn

the only solution i have thus far is to approach lots of women according to my friend.

idk if i'd enjoy the military i dont think i'd appreciate being treated like an animal.

I think i'm low T though so i might just try some natural methods to boost testosterone and see where that goes first.

You need to find a way to boil life down to it's base necessities. Hitchike on your own or with a friend, do odd jobs for money and shelter, bring a tent, a bike and a waterbottle.

When you come back, people will be jealous of your experience. Grow a beard whilst your at it.

If you are unable to do something like that, then take up a martial art or buy a broken old car and rebuild it. You need something you can both dedicate yourself to and use to build your self esteem.

Your family might be incredibly domineering, and I know how that feels, but you sort of just need to ignore them. Show distance from them until they catch your drift.

You could also go to uni or college, if possible. That would be your best option.

Not that user but this is solid fuckin advice. I wish I wasn't so unmotivated, I know
>You need something you can both dedicate yourself to and use to build your self esteem.
is the solution. Yeah I'm being a pussy I know but turning a blind eye to where I'm at is just too hard now. I used to be able to put the feelings aside but I was young and hadn't experienced real life or loss yet

rub off the bandaid dude. i'm 21 and i'm a nice guy and fundamentally girls know that i'm not this nice and i want to fuck them but I always obeyed being a gentleman and being the bigger man and blah blah blah.

basically girls dont care about how smart you are, how good of a person you are or even how good looking you are (unless they want to use you ONLY as a human dildo)

they only care about social value, financial value, masculinity and how confident you are.

the problem is, as i've learned, it's hard to change your personality.

but you have 3 choices really,

delude yourself into thinking girls aren't cunning and believe what they say to your face at face value

or

accept it as a part of life and walk away

or

learn to have very good social skills and be a person with strong boundaries so they don't try you.

alpha guys don't get tested and they beg for your cock as the earlier user mentioned.

you're not dumb and you're not wrong.

women are oftentimes very shit creatures.

they take advantage of anything they're offered or want to do in the present moment despite obligations and just backwards rationalize or justify it later.

Women who fear your emotional reaction or have something they want or need or appreciate you for will not do you wrong if she has any self control but if you subtract value from the situation you will get fucked over.

at least that's what i've uncovered for me.

it's not PC and nobody will tell you this shit but it's true.

the guy i know who changed and has fucked 100s of girls (some married who did and did not say) knows this as well and genuinely does not care anymore.

Women are not pure that's just their mask.
they're much more socially smart than you and are shameless in taking what they want

anyways. /rant.

looks do matter btw, i just meant if you dont have the other stuff

I dropped out of college 3 months ago, actually. Work a retail wagecuck job now. Still, I make 10.75 $ an hour, so it could be worse. The downside is they only let me work 25 hours a week because its cheaper.

You need a happy hour

mega.nz/#F!ARhB1TxJ!nyBY9ygId4zuxHYCiOPeYA

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