How do i get condoms and birth control pills, Sup Forums?

how do i get condoms and birth control pills, Sup Forums?
my gf says she'll only fucc if we have both, but im like 2 and i don't know how i would buy them. any ideas? pic unrelated

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There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn't he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.


I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again post your little pepe cuck image and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don't even fill in the captcha. Maybe you're such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a Sup Forums pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The "epic" pepe hover dick kiss, isn't it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it's ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that's right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she's probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on Sup Forums posting the same image trying to force it. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic meme forcing NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can't even try to talk with you because all you say is "HOVER DICK KISS HOVER DICK KISS." You've become a parody of your own self. And that's all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he's done a million times now. And that's all you'll ever be.


Forever...

At the drugs store you idiot

i know where to get them, but can i buy them without it being awkward as fuck?

how the fuck are you even getting laid

What the fuck is awkward about it? You're getting laid. Literally just throw the condoms and shit on the counter, they ring it up, pay and leave. Theres nothing awkward about it

tbh. I still get awkward about it. So user, best advice is just do it, literally as soon as you pay and get them, you'll completely forget how you felt and call yourself stupid. Has happened to me for years. Lol

im a social autist and i guess im just worried about whether or not they wont sell me them or judge me hard

thanks. also, any advice for condoms? like what the different kinds do, and how long they last until they're no good?

You're afraid the cashier is going to think you're weird for buying their products and then refuse to sell them to you?

They'll sell them to you. Don't worry about it.

This

Sure, chances are you're an average sized guy, so just grab regular durex/trojan's, and get one with multiples of the same kind. so a 5 pack or whatever you decide to get.

The ribbed, her pleasure, thin, whatever doesn't change much.. well, technically the thin feels best (though its still a condom), hot and cold feels dope, but again still a condom).

The real thing you should really worry about is putting one on. When you buy them, take one out at home and learn to roll it on correctly. I still can't wrap my head around it, but sometimes it'll feel tight just keep at it. Chances are you'll waste one or two messing around with it or screwing it up. Don't worry about it.

The birth control method has always been my favorite since i don't have to wear condoms and you get to cum inside. But seriously, trust whoever you're with and wait a week after she starts taking them to cum inside.

To get that, just go to a planned parenthood near by, if available, or just google birth control locations and let her go in, sometimes its free for your first month and sometimes its not. Really random. but usually its like 80$ for 6 months or something.

am i alright with just condoms?

birth control pills are a prescription item for the female, she has to get those. If she does not know that, she is probably like, 12

Fuck condoms IMO it's best without. Plus you can get that scarification when you nut in her.

Yup.

It's usually condoms or birth control, but honestly, having both is probably the best option... I've just never worried about it though.

Just condoms. If you're seriously into this girl, like long term. Buy her something like chocolate or some other sweet.

Lube or toys, dont bother with that, just be you and that's all you need man.
That's not entirely true, midwest girls just don't know about them entirely or religion. Indiana user here.

get otc birth control called plan b
tell your girl to take it everyday for a month
>profit

i forgot that its such a shithole due to the retarded politicians

IMO skip the condoms, shoot for birth control.

Raw or bust baby. Plus if and when I can get those rubbers on, I can feel my dick dying and I got max. 2 minutes of boner left before I need to take it off to let my bloodflow resume.
Why the fuck you would do that explicitly with long term partners as opposed to one night stands, is beyond me.

Oh and also, lube isn't a bad thing to keep around. Especially if you're going for anal. PS you should go for anal.

Lol, pricey

yeah, don't listen to this jackass.

Plan B (or the generic) is in case you ever screw something up and forget a condom or she isnt sure if she took her daily pill. The every day thing is stupid because plan b costs 50$ a pill, fuck that. You could talk to your girlfriend or whatever she is and just chip in most of the birth control cost and it'll equal out.

Yeah. sounds about right.

The issue with this user, is not all younger girls (which im assuming is what user is getting with) feel entirely comfortable getting their downstairs checked out nor have the payment for the check out.
Don't do anal user, especially if you're new to this whole thing, come on guys. dont disappoint me.

this

i dont have a load of spending cash, what do?

To be fair she'll be in the hospital long before she reaches the end of that month.

You're an American femanon? I'm gonna assume OP is American? What's the going rate on birth control pills there anyway? And what about the shot?

Also if she's now already seeing a gyno I think shes missed some stations.

>she's now
*she's NOT

plan b will save you money in the long run

user go to Walmart and/or target get a basket and do self check out. So easy and you don't feel awkward, I do this all the time to buy condoms, lube, oil ect to use on my girl

OP is a pretty legit autist. He'll believe it.

The plan B joke will kill her. Theoretically. She'll be in the hospital with internal bleeding long before she gets to the point of fatality.

My wife is on nuvaring, which is birth control pills but in a vaginal ring form, which only needs to be inserted once a month.

If she is worried about parents finding pills, this is the way to go, but its pricy

genius, thanks my mansauce?

I'm american male.
OP is assumably male as well, sounds like a younger guy too.

birth control varies and hugely dependant on which one your doctor prescibes. If you fall under health care coverage then it could obviously be free.
If it isn't it can vary from 10$-25$-40$-80$ for 3 months, 6 months, and a year. mostly 80$ for 6 months.

I know all this because i've been to a few clinics and what not, to get girls on their both for myself and just a friend type of deal.

this guy doesnt know what he is talking about, she'll be fine

Christ user, I completely forgot about the self check out. I tend to go to CVS/Walgreens/Gas stations (if nothing is close by, though im usually good because of birth control pills).

use self check out, OP.

>still cant wrap my head around it
How did nobody catch that, also checked those digits

wtf, OP.
Condoms you can buy anywhere. Even gas stations. If you're really too autistic to face a cashier buy them from at a grocery or department store with self checkout. (but honestly just buy them anywhere, the cashier will not react. They stock and sell that shit all day).
Birth control has to be prescribed to your gf by a doctor. You can't just buy it over the counter. There are a bunch of different birth control options but she has to talk about them with her doctor.

I'm the guy who posted it, hey op. Seriously, if you want to talk about it if you're still around or someone wants to ask shit.
my kik is Elliot_hiemer and dont send me dick pics guys ; im a straight dude, just trying to help out.