Tfw no reimagined adventure pulp style movies cept for Indiana Jones

>tfw no reimagined adventure pulp style movies cept for Indiana Jones

*sighs* *raises paw* *record scratch* *farts*

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youtube.com/watch?v=MJeoC4i_YIY
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Extraordinary_Adventures_of_Adèle_Blanc-Sec_(film)
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Carter_(film)
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Ah, Mort Kunstler. Why couldn't I live in your world.

the only way we gonna do this is if black people, or some minority, gets to star in that kind of thing, because it's always been a white thing. where's my dirty harry? huh?

>tfw

Shut up

>tfw you'll never be a handsome American soldier who goes on adventures

Why are you so cruel God

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>ywn be a sadisitic Nazi/Cuban/Soviet torturer
born in the wrong generation tbqh

>2016
>Dirty Harry

Good luck. That movie would never be released today. It was too much a product of its time. Crime rates in the inner cities exploded during the 1970's to the worst in Americsn history. It's why there were so many Deathwish knock offs from back then.

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Fallout 3, 4 and New Vegas to a lesser extent are good for a lad mag pulp fix... if video games are your sorta thing

>"Disco, I'm CIA"

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Oh fuck you, I was just tried posting that

I have a pretty hefty collection of this stuff
pulpcovers.com is the best place for it

Not a movie but, Danger 5

The first season of Danger 5 is basically a spot-on parody of these mags, right down to the torture scene with a swastika brand

After a while you noticed a recurring theme

>sinister Soviet/Vietnamese/Cuban/Mafia/Nazi/Chinese has a captured women, usually stripped to some degree with a lantern jaw anglo saxon kicking down a door or leaping through a window to the rescue

>me on the bottom

a pulp standard from at least the 1930s
(I have a lot of that stuff too)

>no season 3

Man-vs-nature is probably the second most common theme after all the rape stuff

It had a perfect ending though

I read somewhere that the Weird Tales editor was hardcore into BDSM so pulp writers would purposely write in scenes of women being tied up and whipped or humiliated etc etc to better increase your chances of it getting published and so that the editor could get the illustrator to depict it on the cover

lmao what the fuck

I never believed in God before clicking this thread.

Weird Tales was illustrated by a woman as it happens, Margaret Brundage, and her stuff was more porny and rapey than any of the guys

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what about this here he isn't saving women from foreigners, he is saving a qt pino boi from a monitor lizard, pulp fiction actually had a lot of diversity

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Movie when?

Why is it that women are so into BDSM? I met a pretty cosmopolitan hispanic chick who I would have never guessed was into that kind of shit. She wanted me to like... command her to do stuff as well as smack and spank her. But yeah, she was really into being told what to do, even if it was like not explicity sexual stuff like to telling her to change her outfit or to untie and retie her shoes.

Needless to say... was not really my thing t b h f a m and we didnt last long

what the fuck was his problem

great thread guys. I'm loving these pics.

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the biological imperative

feminists may say they don't want alpha males, but genes, hormones, and millions of years of evolution don't lie

me on the right desu

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what if all the nazis went to argentina to find a lost civilization as a desperate last ditch effort to revive the reich, hitler and himmler had an interest in the arcane and occult, they also looked for artifacts in tibet

>mfw we haven't even gotten to the horror stuff yet

I'm shocked some of this shit got published as far back as 1950, let alone like 1920's and 30's. Next time someone tries to tell you media is more violent or sexual remind them of this stuff

there are 2 oars there, those bitches could help

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That sounds like every other Alister Mclean novel

They did make a (a fucking awful) b movie with a similar premise called Order of the Black Eagle about Nazis escaping to the jungles of Argentina. Are there even jungles in Argentina? I have no idea

This is my all-time favorite piece; a Hugh Ward from the mid-30s, sold at auction a few years back for five figures

Though the Mysterons plan to conquer the Earth,
This indestructible man will show what he's worth.

These pictures are sexy as hell

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MGSV is p pulp

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Yeah, people back then were pretty huge perverts. Ever watch a 1950's movie and noticed a LOT of """""humorous"""""" scenes involving grown women being spanked? Tons of movies did a sort of """""""comedic""""""" skit that would involve a nagging grown woman being spanked by her potential lover/husband. It was extremely prevalent

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Are the MGS games for Xbox 1 or 360? That's all I have and they look like alright games. I don't have enough of a disposable income to upgrade my now ancient PC

>ywn be a white man gallavanting around the world oppressing natives for corporations while cucking them on the side, completely convinced they are savages and you are on the side of civilization so what you are doing is utterly right

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Why is alt Nazi occult so cool? Wolfenstein and Hellboy are badass

Remember that time Judy Garland saved Jimmy Stewart from a horde of ravenous ants?

We've totally reverted, because nothing today can compare to this. These artist are incredible

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Are these actually stories?

MGSV is on 360, that's what I play it on. It's very fun espionage gameplay.

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did readers realize how ridiculous all these situations were

Because it was all real. Nazis like Rudolp Hess are straight out of a pulp serial. Literally believed Aryans were a tribe of people who fled the destruction of the lost city of Atlantis (mentioned in Plato's Republic) and migrated across Europe before settling all the way in India.

In fact, Nazis believed that the upper castes in some parts of India were Aryans and I know they did at least one """""""scientific expedition""""" to India to do shit like measure people's skulls and nose sizes for comparison of Germans back home. Many party members of the Nazis were literally fucking crazy. Their antics are legendary

is that taylor swift in the front?

>tfw anglo saxon white man
>tfw best days of my race are behind me and now FUCKING WHITE MALES get shit on for all the alpha take no shit attitude of our forefathers

These pictures piss me off. Its always some dudes having fun with some ladies. Or occasionally some ladies minding their own shirtless business. Then some dude gun in hand fucking up the party.

Seriously, the fuck is their problem? Is it a war crime to have a good time?

>Are these actually stories?
Oh yeah, but they're greatly exaggerated for just outright fictionalized

>you will never impregnate an entire tribe of indigenous warrior qts with your superior white seed

;_;

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No. They thought it was super realistic, just like we think superhero movies are realistic now.

hmm
youtube.com/watch?v=MJeoC4i_YIY

how would you revamp something like this for the modern audience

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Is the art similar to the covers?

Were you the dude from earlier? Did you read that link I gave you about Lemuria/Mu?

In older pulps it's generally poorer, but in the men's mags they cover artist often did an interior spread

>Are these stories?

Yes and no. They use to comission fucking awesome illustrations of scenes short stories on the cover to entice potential buyers but sometimes the story or stories featured inside would have nothing to do with the cover at all or in some cases only a very minor scene. Some of these are parody/pastiche/homage of that type of art.

What a qt.

Kraut bastards.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Extraordinary_Adventures_of_Adèle_Blanc-Sec_(film)

Bretty good.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Carter_(film)

Really good.

That's the most recent ones I could think of, not including coming movies that may or may not get released.

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oh damn

*unzipz dick*

It's interesting because when I researched Lemuria, I came across information that there was a "white brotherhood" library, or something along those lines, with documents from that time somewhere in Indo-China

Shot for shot remake with Idris Elba as Hitler obviously

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but they are right to be salty

what we can all learn from this is that what really matters in life is getting money and you shouldn't be distracted by silly things like race

Lol strange. Many of the earliest Nazis were members of a secret society called "Society of Thule" which really subscribed to that sort of occult thinking. Apparently, knock off Freemason type secret fraternal orders were very popular before WW2 - like the Ku Klux Klan etc etc

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Great White Brotherhood actually. Sounds Nazi right? Based in India

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sounds like some uncharted shit.

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