What keeps Sup Forums up all night?

What keeps Sup Forums up all night?

Ill start:
My ex banging dudes and doing all the coke in the world coasting free in the world

Im dying and dont have the money to do anything about it

Self doubt about my chosen career

I dream/remember when I was 12 and my uncle would fuck me
I wake up hard as a rock and fap furiously
then I can't sleep because of shame

I get all excited when it feels like the world has gone to sleep and I am finally alone. I feel like sleep is a waste of this precious time so I stay up late and face being tired in the mornings.

Adderall right now, but i usually cant sleep because when i try to relax my thoughts i start to worry about my short-comings

The behavior of 6+ dimensional cubes and spheres and theoretical maths in general.

You gotta get over it man. I used to be that guy. Now that i have seen two ex girlfriends on television. One on a syndicated network as a news anchor the other on a show about tattoos. I had no choice. Shes on fucking mtv news for fucks sake.

I'm a neet that sleeps during the day

My ex with her new bf...sad thing is we broke up over 4 years ago

my company sucks ass and having been paid in 3 months

haven't

I would. But moving across the country and working another career hasent remedied this beast. Im doomed until i find another woman/meaning to life

Inb4 dicks

Op here
Been 2 for me i feel like a dumbass

Got a shadow on my head, no clue what it is and docs wont do any drilling unless theres a need, so my brain wont shut down normally, on 4 meds to help me sleep and stay asleep, but still only get 4ish hours of rest a night.

Then this fucking farm im living on has some serious paranormal shit going on.

Me getting cucked by an underage faggot that lives an hour drive away from my house exchanging nudes with the person I love as I come to terms with the fact that she doesn't love me no matter how much she says it. Actions speak louder than words.
And what's funny, is even after writing this out I'm not convinced. I haven't convinced myself yet. I know she doesn't love me. I try to tell myself that she hates my guts. I've seen her give more hugs to strangers than to me. She doesn't talk to me when we're out in public, just when it's just us. And yet my mind just can't process reality. So I stay up and talk to you guys, to fill that gap and spill the secrets I can't live with. Irl, people think Im a saint. Here, I'm an open book. Ask me anything, I'll be honest mates.

Oh man..the only advice I have is the same one I keep telling myself-find another girl.But I know how hard that is,cause I haven't had one since that break-up.

Why are you still with her? Sounds alot like the one i had..

How old are you and your gf?

Christ,man,that sucks so much.I had that before so I feel your pain.I got nothing to ask you but I can offer company.

What pisses me off is how ez it is for them to get a new guy and forget you. Or how cucked you feel on a day to day basis still being inlove with her

I'm not too sure really. The notes section of my phone is filled with, and I shit you not, hundreds of drafts of how I'd go about cutting it off and rants I just want to tell her. She makes me feel like a shitty person. And then I know I fucking am, she sends me lewd pics of herself and I jack it like crazy but then I realize it's not like she even wants me to. I know I haven't answered your question, the best answer I can give is I don't know. I've tried, early December I ended up not talking to her for two weeks, but I felt like an ass and made amends. It was over those two weeks some swole ass looking teenager starts talking to her and I found out he masturbates to her with her consent, she's just cool with it and sends him nudes to fuel the fire. She's been abused by so many people, she clings to me because I try to be humble and put oher before everything. She's told me she loves me, and even just a couple hours ago said that yet again. I don't know man. I'm being broken by her, but even as I type this I'm just in a state of bliss thinking about her. I love her man. I guess she's just a drug for me. She has done so much for me in the past though. But she's breaking me down, making me lose it.

I'm 26, she's 24. She's fuckin hot man, but I wouldnt dare post pics of her, clean or lewd, not around these parts atleast if that's where you were going.

Thanks Sup Forumsrother. It's nice to know I'm not alone, really. I don't know how to escape. If I am to leave the relationship, then I have to come to fucking reality. As I keep saying this over and over again like an autist, I don't feel anything like regret it remorse. Just thinking about her makes me happy, for reasons beyond my understanding. It needs to be all of me that comes to terms and leaves. It'd be for my own good.

Interesting. My ex got me over my drug addiction and i helped with hers. (I smoked oxycottin before they made it so u cant crush ir up anymore) she then became swol with yoga and shit and met another swol asshat from the gym then bam. 5 years down the drain

All i can say is tit for tat, you owe her nothing friendo. You cannot save a woman who does not wanna be saved.

Oh yeah man,pisses me off too! Listen to what my ex did to me. She asked me to go on a drink and I accept cause of that maybe-we-can-get-together-again feeling. Just as we're supposed to meet she tells me "someone" made her mad. We all know who "someone" is. I had to sit through the whole hour fake smiling and laughing knowing she had a new bf. Now that's a bitch move.

Worked in recruitment for 10 years. On average made the company 250k per year.

Started my own company 3 years ago, and have not done more than a weeks worth of work.

Op again, but facing reality will only get harder the longer you wait. Id offer console but if shes cool with guys jackin it to her nudes (that she gives them????) then thats recipe for cuck(disaster)

I wish you all the luck and strength man!

Op - Fuck man its like what mine did. She said after we broke up she "met" some girls at a bar and got fucked up for a few days and then weeks. Then we stumbled upon each other. Went for coffee, only for her to admit they werent girls

That is true I guess. I do feel in debt to her though, just in the slightest. It isn't my motive for sticking through with the bs, but seriously. I used to struggle with suicidal thoughts daily, I would tie and untie a noose as my only coping mechanism as if it helped, wrote out letters, tried to find better ways. And then she caught me. In fact, really my family caught me preparing to hang myself as I was setting up in the bathroom to just end it, and this was back when things were just, "I kinda like you, I kinda like you too." My family kicked me out of the house and rebuked me, abandoning me for my attempted selfish actions. She was there for me though. She understood. She helped me out. She stopped me from killing myself. I decided to live for her, and now things have progressed so far. And now in this state of bliss, whatever the hell was troubling me so much back then I've just become blind to. It's like she was a cure.

You know what they say, poison is the cure. Its up to you to decide what you get from it.

Ive since gone back to using drugs to cope. Which fuels my... lets say tendencies. Falling back to how you were before you guys became tight is usually a sign that she is infact the poison.

Although she helped you out, you'll need to accept that, or forever hold your peace. I mean think about it man she would probably want an open relationshit anyways

Your image of the situation is absolutely correct, no need for the writing marks defining that confusion/reassurance needed. As I said in my first post on this thread, I am getting cucked (or atleast building up to its inevitability). I want to get my mind off of her but I don't know how. I'd need to go to rehab or something to learn how to take my mind off of her, she just makes a part of me blind to the situation. I don't know how to describe it, I'm not schizophrenic or bipolar or anything, it's just kinda like I know but I'm too numb to care and just want the benefits of having her because she gives me a sensory high (?). It's weird trying to explain.

What do you do with your free time? Do you get out often?

this, also nuclear war

She probably would. I don't want to go back to that behavior though. She's fixed me up, set me straight and helped me realize what I'm really worth (a bit more atleast than I thought I was). There's uncertainty as to what happens once I leave and how to do it. I mean like drugs is an addiction, but that constant wanting to an hero isn't just something you can buy off the street and get hooked back on, ya know? And I don't want her to live with the guilt if I do go back and an hero as the final solution, I can't let that happen.

I work out mostly, that and just talk to her a lot about pretty much everything. She's grown more open about what she's been doing as I haven't really shown any reaction to it. I don't really have a reaction to the situation myself. I'm just, "here", is the best way to put it.

hating myself

>breaking bad

Do you think shes with you out of fear of what youd do if she left?

As someone who was in your situation from this past August through the first half of November, I have the advice you need friend. End it. Just walk up to her, tell her you cant keep going like this, its over. And do NOT keep any contact info from her. remove her from your phone and any and all social media. You will get pretty depressed when you see she has another guy within 24 hours, but you will realize this is better for you. Trust me user, it hurts but it is for your own good. Like amputating a gangreous foot.

I tell myself so often that that's exactly all it is. When we spoke today, I was talking about a friend from junior high who passed away a couple years ago that I knew liked me, and she just kinda goes, "Hey user, I love you." But my reaction wasn't "I love you too." All I said was that she didn't need to sympathize for me, in that exact wording plus her name.

I suppose that's the only way to go. She will seek me out irl though. I'd need to move and everything, or suffer fallout that may get her hurt. I don't want to hurt her. I can't.

I've been married since 05/2015 and it's slowly slid downhill already. Fuck women and their ability to be completely fake for the two years I dated this girl.
Anyways, a co-worker I always had feelings for is moving away, and I went over to her place to say goodbye the other night. She was drunk, and I knew she always had feelings for me as well, so we made out. Didn't fuck, but still felt super guilty for about 3 days. Clearly it keeps me up, I'm up right now. Going back to her place in the morning, totally pointless and can only make things worse...gonna do it anyways
tl;dr
>marriage is shit
>make out with co-worker moving away
>throws my moral compass, dick for a tizzy
>keeps me up at night

Try taking her out to do things to see if she actually enjoys doing things with you, pay attention to where her eyes go? At this point its really trying to prove to yourself that shes done her job and youve done yours, it needs to end before you kill her or yourself my man. Or atleast put your foot down and tell her to knock this silly shit off

Theres no need to move user. Just tell her clearly that she isn't taking care of your needs and its over. Do NOT listen to her "I can be better" or "I can change" she will try and get you to stay with her with. If she reapected you, she would have changed long ago. I was arguing with my gf for months, until I realized what I wanted meant less than horse shit to her.

*respected
dammit