ITT: small things you think only you do

ITT: small things you think only you do.

listen to philisophical audio books till i fall asleep

Pull my ass cheeks apart when I sit to take a shit.

Eat crisps (or for the Americans: chips) with a spoon from a bowl for not to get my hands greasy.

Do this too

Fuck my girlfriend

I print photos of my friend and put them in my underwear before hanging out with them

Fuck yeah, I'm not alone.

>think
being the critical word there

pluck one hair out of eyebrows, puts it in the jar, when jar becomes full, i eat it

I eat them like a lizard, i also smell my fingers after touching balls/ass/pits

The jar, or the hair?

I do this, I'm keeping that ass as clean as possible

Anyone else is welcome to the sweaty four-eyed ginger hippo if they want her kek

have heard this one before, fucking why?

I smell the toilet paper after wiping away my swamp ass

aw hell no

I prefer to listen to music at different pitches. When listening to music I open up the Realtek audio manager and using the karaoke function I change the pitch of sounds on my computer depending on what I am listening to. Most of the time I change the pitch to -3 or +1.

Listen to people speak different languages on the train, I know 4.

this is why god didn't give you qints

Eat my cum every time after I jerk off

thats sort of interesting. I used to dj, and you are constantly messing with pitch/speed. You are probably also changing the key the song is in right? you might be subconsciously adjusting them to be in a matching key ( which sounds better )

i do. I'm married and want some ugly nerdy college aged girl to fuck on the side.

I do it because I want them to stay friends with me

Dismantle /generals/.

what would you do if they found out

It's intoxicating

Why would they find out
The pictures are in my underpants

Yep, I do that too.

I will take a slice of cheddar cheese, cover it in pickles, and add a second slice of cheddar. Breadless sandwich

you must have a backup story though just in case they ever do. what would you tell them?

same

need to try this

Same here too.

I don't know I'd probably deny the pictures are here
Like "no man there are no pictures in my underpants what the fuck"
Until they accept that there are no pictures

I smell my finger everytime i touch my balls,ass,nose,back of the ear,arm pit or any part of my body that produce bad smell

>wipe my ass even if I don't shit. I have to take trips just to wipe ass
>use nail/cutical pusher to clean out earwax
>chew soda can tabs, fold with teeth
>sometimes fap to extremely zoomed in pics of friend's tits, like pixel level zoom

i'm a guy and i wear panties under my guy clothes

Discovered only yesterday:
>ltake shit about noon
>some light activity afternoon to get slightly sweat
>shower in the evening
>while in shower, dont clean your ass on purpose, only quick stream of water to it
>go out, stay in bathroom
>hairdry your ass
>tfw godlike smell, disgusting and fascinating at the same time fills the whole bathroom

Everytime i pick my booger, i make into a ball using my palms before trhrowing them

I type out copy pasta manually.

everytime. im not a damn savage

wtf the last one

kek

i grow one fingernail out really long for the sole purpose of scraping shit out of my nose and ears

tell which way the clouds are going

...

Dunno bro, zoomed pussy doesn't do it for me either. Gotta be the nipple. I've fapped to the top of the asscrack too, coin slot

>become friends with underage girl on random mmo
>make catfish pro before catfishing was popular
>develop friendship with girl
>develop relationship with girl
>get her to send nudes/vids
>build up a massive collection over the years
>make a new catfish pro with her pics
>use catfish pro to get neckbeards and white knights to buy me games on steam and give me in game money of current game i'm playing at the time
>now using the catfish pro of girl to try to get my gf's teen cousin to show me his cock erect in his little sister's panties
fuck you Sup Forums

Give me some sources dude
I'm begging you

When I use mouthwash, I make fists with my hands and throw my head back and and howl like a werewolf.

Thanks for the kek user

Rape my sister occasionally

I eat out and fuck my 12 yo sis almost daily

Sometimes, when I have a shower, I shake the shower gel onto my face to get the feeling of taking a huge cum facial.

I sit in the bathroom with the lights off and the shower on, drink and lurk on Sup Forums

I have to blow off the cigarette filter before I smoke.

Just tried this. Ass was perfectly clean but it felt to be more painful than usually. But yea, as they say: No pain no gain

I spray the toilet with desinfectant, bleach, clorox, or whatever after every shit. I like my bathroom to smell and tofeel clean always.

Whenever I get a drawing capcha I always draw cocks.

>Britfag
Help, I can't start threads on any Sup Forums boards!

Seems like you're alone here buddy

Aim my piss one side where the water meets the bowl to start whirlpool of piss.

Are the pickles sliced or whole? What kind? Dill? Need more details about this. How's it taste?

This is truly autistic

Yup

Runner ups here

I subconsciously say things in a way that makes me sound like an asshole or I'm being insincere and I can't help it. in my mind I'm having a perfect conversation, but when I look back at what I say I just feel awful.

Go to the freezer, and just breathe in the super cold air coming out of the top vent. Because it feels good

This is probably a good thing.

you're just a faggot

Can't wait for pic related to become a movie

Doing this as we speak lol.

I do this only to reduce the sound of my piss hitting the water

Oh.
Or at least a goddamn Netflix series

Didn't mean to write that like a command, but if you guys want to do so feel free

masturbate

You sick fuck.

Welcome to the spectrum of mild autism, come join us! :)

In the missionary position for the sole purpose of not procreating?

Use the term "glossopoeia" instead of "c*********".

>still taking soda in 2017

Pick the dirt from underneath my nails then roll it into a ball then smash it and smell it.

Aw man you had a good thing going there, now we know your just trolling. Biggest disappointment of 2017 so far.

Quads of disgustingness

I always thought about it. I've even asked my closest friends and relatives if I have ever seems a little "off" 100% of them saI'd that there wasn't anything wrong with me. In a way, none of them answered my question. I smoked weed with a friend once and thought that I was actually an actual ChromosonePotato.jpg. I seriously thought my entire life was a lie and that I'm seeing myself as a 7/10 handsome was just a hoax and I can't actual see my down syndrome face.
I mean, I could be wrong, or just fucking paranoid. I dunno

I rip out the hair around my asshole. Like, I roll it between my fingers until i get a nice firm grip and rip it out in one tug.

Me too

Il spend 20 minutes picking my nose to get the deep ones out, instead of 2 seconds to blow it because pulling out a large booger is extremely satisfying

Jerk off every night immediately before trying to sleep.

I used to do that as a kid.

Yup, helps me sleep

>>I have to take trips just to wipe ass
Nigger, you didn't take trips at all. You didn't even take doubles here. No wiping for you, I guess

Same, I also do this with my pit hair.

This is something literally everone does

ive collected my nails for the paste six or so months

its so calming, i love looking at them and shaking the jar to hear them hitting the side of it. also reminds me of time passing

I would love to know the reaction of another person if they found them

And then eating those!!.
Godlike!!

same here

like, they dont really look like nails.

looks sorta like lots of little pieces of clear string, i cant grow them out, feels horrible