Help. How do i buy i dildo without my parents knowing?

Help. How do i buy i dildo without my parents knowing?

kill self

Step one: Buy dildo
Step b: Don't tell parents
Step triangle: Leave it in a spot they won't check

source: am tranny trash

Now stop being a faggot and go be a faggot you faggot.

Problem is i dont jave any fucking money. And they will check the package that i got delivered.

Have you tried moving from under your parents' roof and not fucking leeching off them?

oh boy user that's a drastic action to take【°〜°】and i wouldnt recommend it to anyone

neither would the upset eugene meme embedded in the sentence above

Maybe it's time to get a job.

Retard how is this even a problem you have if you don't have any money you can't buy one

What would be a good size?

Have an friend/older friend with their own place get it for you.
You might have to send them pics of you using it though.

Wait, how old are you and why do you want it?

Are you fucking dumb? No money means you can't buy anything. Go suck some dicks, get some cash then go to a sex store. THEN follow my previous 5 steps. Goddamn, us trannies are supposed to be the dumb ones.

Old. Possibly under 18. Why, i wanna feel good man.

Bump what's a good option for a beginner

Nerd bedda ged b&

Why buy a dildo when there's pickles in the fridge.

Just get a package of hotdogs and pretend they're the New York Knicks.

What size?

google "general delivery" if you live in the us.

is it safe to use fit food of any sort in one's asshole ? surely you might get an infection or something 【°〜°】


if not, what other household tools can i use for a dildo

Move out and get a life.

Also, what would be a good website to order from?

>Buy carrots
>Leave for a couple of days in a plastic bag
>They go all bendy
>Lube that veggie up
>Lube that ring piece up
>Poke in pooper
>move in and out frantically
>Profit????

Or use Lego for the pro player stage.

Just steal your mom's dildo.
What's she going to do, ask you to give it back?

This

Go to a fucking sex shop, walk in the front door, hand the people cash, and be more creative.

Careful he might actually follow this advice.

【°〜°】

Has anyone ever order a sextoy online and sent it as a present anonymously?

Make sure the package doesn't look phallic in nature. Just order a pipe wrench and 2 billiard balls to be shipped together. This will throw them off.

Just get one of these neck massagers, they'll never guess what else you're doing with it.

>careful
>on a guatemalan entomology forum

It's like telling Steve Mantaray to be careful. I mean Chestspike Irwin. You get the idea.