Okay, let's have a bit of storytime Sup Forumsros, here is about the first time I learned about weed

Okay, let's have a bit of storytime Sup Forumsros, here is about the first time I learned about weed.

> be me, 12
> In a kids home for troubled kids
> I was sent there because I was caught pulling another kids fingernails off
> Morons never caught me pulling their teeth out, that shit was priceless
> One day, after jimmy and me were having a little ‘fun’
> I told jimmy that he fell down the stairs
> Jimmy was a fucking tard
> Not like a legit retard, but a normie
>I fucking hated jimmy, he was only there because he kicked his teacher in the nuts
> So jimmy was tied to a table in the shed, and I had just finished taking two molars
> Cleaning up blood is a mess, and I was young, so it was harder.
> Fucking jimmy cried like a bitch, I never cried that hard when I pulled my own teeth out.
> anyways, told him that he fell down the stairs, if anyone asked
> Fucking jimmy was such a cuck, went along with it and ran inside once I got him cleaned up
> On my way out, about to hide MY new teeth, I hear jeff and craig, (two other kids) talking about smoking grass

> It was evidently why they got stuck in this home too with us all.
> think to myself “Why the fuck would you smoke grass?
> Walk up to the teens, they were sixteen and fifteen respectively
> Craig laughs like a fucking moron, drool literally slopping down his front, at least Jeff didn’t drool, but he was a fucking tard too
> They say its because its so cool, and gets you high.
> Stare at them for a full minute, then jeff elaborates, saying that you smoke it to get high, and it’s really good shit.
> Tell them to show me.
> Faggots don’t have anymore on them, smoked it all up.
> I stare at them, they are literally standing on grass, it’s all around us.
> They get nervous again, and walk away, I evidently made them uncomfortable for some reason
> I fucking hated literally everyone I ever met, but these fucking idiots were making me want to take their teeth too.

> Anyways, after they leave, I pick up a handful of grass, find a lighter in the garage, and begin to make it smoke.
>Smells like shit, and gives me a headache as it inhale the smoke
> I legit think they are even bigger morons now.
> Get really pissed, and put the lighter and burned grass back, grab my favorite pliers and a claw hammer, then begin to hunt down jeff, as I don’t want to deal with fucking crag’s stupidity right now.
> Jeff is busy fingering one of the girls at the home, trying to get into her pants
> Jesus fucking christ on a stick I want to skin him alive
> Never actually get the chance to skin him alive
> Instead, I walk up to him, and calmly state, “jeff, if you don’t get your fingers out of her pants, I am going to snip them off.
> To accentuate my point, I click my favorite pair of pliers right next to his ear
> Both jeff and Jessica jump a foot in the air, and I swear jeff has pissed himself when he sees the pliers

> Calls me a psychopath, “Sticks and stones, now, about the grass, you lied to me.”
> He looks confused and nervous, Jessica is gone, ran off.
> Smile and click the pliers again, “Come on jeff, tell me why you would smoke grass”
> That unibrow furrows, and he shakes his head, “Because it gets you high you little psycho”
> I really want those perfect teeth of his to be replaced by gaping bloody holes for lying to me
> “No, I just burned some grass, and it smells like shit and gives you a fucking headache, WHY would you smoke grass?”
> Jeff looks really worried as I pull the hammer out, and give it a few test swings, especially since this hammer is so shiny.
> “Dude, it just gets you high, where did you get grass?”
> I stare at him, and slowly, and obviously point to the grass not four inches from his foot, “this shithole has a full lawn of it.”
> He stares at me
> I stare at him
> He bites his lip, looks at my hammer, it’s clear this faggot is trying to be diplomatic

> “Okay, it’s called weed, actually.”
> I glare at him, “You smoke weeds?”
> Shakes his head, jeff looks exasperated, “Its called a lot of things little man, grass, weed, pot.”
> I swear at that moment I want to knock him out and take his two front teeth for trying to bullshit me like this
> “Here, I promise, the next time I get some, I’ll share it with you, okay man?”
> Weigh the options, and shrug, “If you are lying to me, you’ll regret it.
> He promises me he isn’t, and sidesteps around me to head off after Jessica.
> Faggot doesn’t think I can’t hear him call me unstable, i’ll fucking break his kneecaps and make him permanently unstable.
> two weeks later, jeff comes up to me after we had finished the outside chores, some bullshit about trying to teach us how to appreciate what we have
> These adults need to be lobotomized
> He tells me he has some grass
> After literally mowing the lawn, I glare at him and he quickly corrects himself, “The pot man, weed, remember?”

> I was sent there because I was caught pulling another kids fingernails off
> Morons never caught me pulling their teeth out, that shit was priceless
nigger u what

> Oh, right, he isn’t being stupid, at least in these few seconds.
> He leads me behind the shed, and pulls out a filthy glass pipe and a tiny baggie of some green plant shit.
> I give him a look as he just says, “I promise, you’ll love this.”
> Faggot mutters under his breath, “You probably need it.”
> I make a mental note to take his premolars later.
> He packs the filthy bowl and hands it to me, holding a lighter out, and tells me how to use it.
> Takes me about twenty seconds to get it right, but I suck on the pipe and burn the edge of the bowl as he told me to.
> Cough my fucking lungs up, and hacking like I just tried to breathe water.
> I don’t drop the pipe at least, but the lighter is in the dirt now
> The faggot is grinning
> I glare at him, take a breath, and snarl, “What the fuck?”

> He keeps grinning, “Wait for it.”
> for some reason, I don’t feel like gutting him like a fish.
> I feel tingly
> My body is pulsing.
> My conception of time is fucking gone, Can’t tell if ten hours or ten minutes have passed
> Oh shit, this feels nice.
> I look the pipe after calming myself down from coughing like I tried to inhale niagara falls
> Oh. So this is grass
> I smoke more, cough more, and smoke again.
> Jeff looks a bit annoyed, but doesn’t say anything, taking the pipe before I can get a fourth hit
> At that point, I don’t fucking care, I don’t feel like stripping the flesh from his bones, or taking his teeth.
>I don’t even hate his stupid ass anymore, I don’t give a fuck for once.
> This shit is great.
> we spend the next two hours chilling and staring at the clouds

And that, Sup Forumsros, is how I learned about weed for the first time. Ay stories from you fuckers?

Can you not read, nigger?

Nigger, you were one hell of a fucked up kid

If it helps, I am a professional dentist now.

Tbh i hope you get hit by a bus.

Hahaha, thats some fucking dark irony right there

I assume you make some nice cash, right

Why? Are you another normie who shouldn't have their teeth?

Not as much as I like, but its enough to not live like the bitch who birthed me, or her crackhead fuckbuddy who helped her make me.
I still hate jimmy though.

Hot. Would let you take a few of my teeth.

Never met someone who had a fetish for it, but I am a lot better at it now, I could make your mouth the perfect cockholster for me.

underage b& 3edgy5me faggot.

get a real job, move cities and get on with your life. that's what it means to be an adult. juvenile virgins smh.

pics of teeth or it didnt happen. no way you wouldnt keep YOUR teeth that you claimed
op is fag
ops a fag

Really? Here are some, faggot.

Aww, little bitch cry some more for me.
Why don't you share some of your childhood stories.
Seriously, why are tou all so fucking focused on the teeth part? You bitches sound like you're fresh off tumblr.

>Ay stories from you fuckers?
After I quit drugs, I got my life back together, did better in school, was profoundly more productive, developed skills, gained knowledge, and I spent some time with psychology.

It's my highly educated and experienced opinion that recreational drug use is stupid bullshit.

With some of the bullshit that I hear from my stoner friends, I want to rip off their fingernails, and pull out their teeth.

Some people I know are such fucking stupid ass bullshitters; the world would be better off without them. Not to mention that they're stoners.
Fucking stupid ass, ignorant ass, delusional ass, lying ass, piece of shit.
Seriously, one of these guys just shits bullshit out of his mouth like an anti-personnel riot canon. Also, if he had a gram of intelligence, he'd put together enough information to figure out that I can tell he's pulling bullshit lies out of his ass.

>that's what it means to be an adult.
If you think that that's what it means to be an adult, and you're a legal adult, then you've failed at being an adult, and you've failed at being a person.

>highly educated
>on Sup Forums
Pick one, an educated person wouldn’t ne wasting their time on this site.

>Pick one, an educated person wouldn’t ne wasting their time on this site.
Ignorance and delusion often go hand in hand, user.

Indeed they do, too bad the irony is lost on you.

>too bad the irony is lost on you.
Are you implying that I've made assumptions, user?
If you've assumed that I've made assumptions, then you'd be delusional, friend.

>putting words in my mouth
>talking yourself this fast in circles
Yeah, you're making my point for me.

>>putting words in my mouth
If I had access to your mouth, I wouldn't put words in them.
But, perhaps, I'd put a pair of plyers in there.

You expect me to believe a 16 yr old is scared of a 12yr old with a hammer

Shit you're edgy as fuck

Op you're fucking edge master 9000

That post was posted be me, and I'm not OP.
Are you OP?

>Faggot doesn’t think I can’t hear him call me unstable, i’ll fucking break his kneecaps and make him permanently unstable.

Like you would even know what to do, normie. I could, however, show you intimately.

I liked that part, too!

that was the edgiest work of fiction I read today, congrats

I don't particularly care if you believe it's true or not, I came to share
Do you feel like sharing?

>be me
>17 and never smoked but interested in trying
>bought a gram off a faggot dudebro in my Spanish II class
>have stoner friend, go to his place to smoke
>meet his mom at the door
>she's actually pretty good-looking for a woman in her forties, redhead, thin
>make small talk with her
>"What are you studying in school, user?"
>tell her I like to write
>"Oh haha I'm a writer too!"
>starts telling me about some vampire book she was writing
>friend comes out to get me
>"I didn't know your mom was a writer."
>"She's not."
>found out later she was a stripper
>kek

>first time is off this ghetto gravity bong made out of a soda bottle and an instrument mouthpiece
>I just about died when I took my first hit because I did what my friend told me to and inhaled a ton of smoke
>Didn't feel much at first, pretty disappointed
>5 minutes later I'm uncontrollably laughing my ass off
>laugh so much and so hard everyone else starts laughing too
>later go out and buy food for everyone
>was a good day

And that was my first time doing weed. Pic related, part of the artwork that was on the walls in my friend's room. Got a bunch more, can post if there's any interest.

k