I want to kill myself but I can't on account of the absolutely abhorrent things my family would say at my funeral...

I want to kill myself but I can't on account of the absolutely abhorrent things my family would say at my funeral. "He was depressed", "mentally ill", "we should've seen this coming" blah blah blah. Fuck I hate everyone.

>Join military
>Ask to be in most active warzone
>Jump on grenade to save battle buddy
>Free suicide
>Parents won't be sad
>You're an war hero
>Parents can't blame anyone
>user ze war hero

>implying you will care what they say when you are dead

murder suicide you dip

I could only dream of such a bright future

"user was a shitposter"
Should be your biggest fear.

You will be fucking dead you useless piece of shit. They will make tepidly positive remarks about you, in an effort to try to convince themselves you were anything but a waste of resources and oxygen. You will be dead, so you won't care, but you already know it's true.

Donate your body to science so there will be no funeral

but first get help, you will only suffer while your body slowly deteriorates...it's a slow death.

Take it from me a paraplegic with multiple addictions and a soon to be dead man.

Shit if I had known I'd be a paraplegic from a robbers gunshot i'd join up. I'd make my life mean something...coulda shouldof wouldof

...

Trump made me realize how out of touch i am with society. I didn't know people hated mexicans so much, it hurt me beyond belief.

At least they will talk about you, isnt this great?

If you kill yourself please make sure you have enough money to pay for your funeral or disposal of your remains. it's bad enough they'll grieve over you but dont put them in debt burying your worthless ass. get a job and save save save. while you are at it see a shrink so you can maintain that job you cunt.

Not like you'd be around to hear it you dumbfuck

...

sup, i'm on 200mg doxepine and life is shit. sleeping all day and after waking up first thing is i'm whining in my pillow. how 2 life Sup Forums?

>user gets job to pay for own shitty funeral
>sees shrink to maintain shitty job
>shrink slowly fixes anons brain
>user progresses in company
>within decade user is on the directorial board
>retires at 50 with millions saved in stocks and fine arts
>this is the same time elon musks first space X mission to mars is set to take off
>user buys himself a seat
>sent off to mars to die as first colonizer
>no funeral needed
>profit

...

...

don't kill yourself find love and keep searching for a heart of gold

I'm mentally ill myself and every odd day is a living hell, I have no friends, no point
I stay in my room getting laughed at by demons.

You would have no idea the hell the voices put me through, but I keep living, my head above water.

I have died on multiple occasions i'm cursed with an incredibly good memory.

Your probably thinking what the fuck but I tell you know you come back before your final death in a new life line where in this case you have died but live on in a parallel almost simulation of what your life would have been like if you didn't die.

Take my accusations as falsities but know this
I have been crushed by a car I have been frozen in the rain.

I have had many dreams explaining this and taken back to that time to experience again
it stains you like a mark and you are cursed by death.

My advice, Die as little as possible

>Donate your body to science so there will be no funeral
>Thinking there wouldn't be a funeral just because the body is missing LUL