Ask anything to a soldier in the British Army?

Ask anything to a soldier in the British Army?

PS don't join

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Why not join? Because lack of war or what?

Why not the Royal Marines, bro?

There' so much wrong in the army everything has in house politics involved. So much bullshit you have to put up with for the money

I can't stand being cold and wet and marines love wet and dry drills which at 0200 I refuse to be apart of

What reg are you in?

Even though your an adult you have inspections on your room before you go on leave.

Recently all the "yes men" have been promoted people who haven't spend enough time in the lower rank.

You cant promote till the person above you get promoted, you could be on the same wage for years before you get promoted because of some shit cunt above you.

No more bonuses to stay in for any amount of time.

The Army no longer cares about you.

Im in the Royal Artillery I won't say much more than that

You sound like a whiney crow bag.
What's it like getting spammed for duties all the time because no on likes you and you have no backbone?

crow bag? you creature get back on guard you shit house

I'll be laughing at you when I'm on the flipside

Does the MOD pay computer system still crash all the time and is down for long periods? Are all the British Army computer systems still totally ancient and as easy to hack as they always were. I've often thought you could, with a few hours work put the British Armed forces on their knees by crashing their shitty pay and purchasing systems. You could wipe their employee records without much effort and they wouldnt even know who was working for them. Fuckin kek.

Guard? I'm way past those days.

I'm sure you will as a gunner. You guys are not even considered an asset, let alone gain enough quals for a decent job in civvie street.

You sound like a typical 3 year private.

Further to this you can control a British Trident nuclear missile with a laptop and a decent RF transmitter. Next time they test one we could get it to land in The Whitehouse. Lolololol

Yes, the system the NHS turned down because it's so shit.

We get days off sometimes because DII is down

ayyyy sounds just like the us marines, treated like children, expected to act like men. Mediocrity is tolerated. Just as long as the boxes are checked off, and the powerpoints flow.

I can't even disagree with you we get no transferable skills or trades unless you have a comms background or C and C+E

Can't even be trusted to clean you're own room or rifle and underpaid and overworked

I know because the navy gets the same shitty Defense Intranet. I hacked it with a cellphone when the CPO was demonstrating it in basic training.

Make yourself an asset then!
Standard and enhanced learning credits are there to be abused.
Get on courses, get a posting to a training depot to promote quicker.
The entire career is a big blag.

Do you like fish and chips?

I wouldn't be surprised if someone took it down with a spoon the army seem to get all the hand me downs or the over expensive shit kit

I can't promote any quicker within less than a year of being in regt I'd done a cadre. I've asked to get on course but just get chinned off

more of a scallop and fish guy

Yeah I reckon a spoon and a Casio calculator wrist watch is all it would take. One of the reasons the nhs turned it down was cos of security fears around hacking records. That systems got more back doors than a gay nightclub. It's only a matter of time before someone does it, even if its not Russia or China or Belgium then it could just as easily be some newfag from here.

First 4 of your service number? 2501 oldfag here... Joined in 91, probably before you were even born.

If I joined it'd be as an NCO because I'm not fucking retarded. I did the stupid practice test online and got 98% because I tried to do it quickly. It was shit like "Which one of these is a 1/4 represented as a decimal?" like what the fuck?

And I am actually retarded, got my head smashed in in secondary school. Long story. But not like we're expected to do heavy lifting anyway. We're the bitch boys for the fucking septics so they can pretend to do the majority of the work while the SAS actually do the work and the septics then take credit for it.

9 year para reg here, 3005.... fuck you're old nigga

Born 73. Joined the RCT before it became RLC. Trained at Buller, across the road from the para barracks with the dakota outside it.

3305 Nigga u ancient.

Reported to your commanding officer for disciplinary action over being racist.

Overseas territory fag with a UK passport hoping to move to the UK in September and then start a career in the army. I'm 23 but in 2011 I had a bike accident and now have 3 metal plates in my face. I can see properly, don't really have double vision unless I look up with my eyes.

Should I never mention this to a recruiter? What is the eye exam like?

My CO is the most racist cunt I've ever met
Every figian is a wog

Stay the fuck away You metal faced, bong eyed cunt

Standard opticians test. Cover one eye, read the chart. Piss easy. Memorise it.

What Overseas Territory? Bermuda? Cayaman Islands? St Helena and Calcicos? Falklands? Ascension (In which case, fuck off septic)? Pitcairn? Gibraltar (in which case fuck you for changing your flag)? Those chuckle fucks from that Mauritius Island that is legally British clay but they claim isn't?

Ah he's from Fiji is he?

Lmao

Bermuda

Hey OP. Amerifag here. How accepting are brits towards americans these days? I thinking of living abroad, while working restaurants, just to get more culture.

Is it really that bad?

Neat. Shame moving the other way (UK to Bermuda or to any OST is a fucking pain in the ass).

How do we react to septic cunts who ruined this planet in the process of getting more shekels because their Jewish overlords said "can't let Britain and France maintain order on the planet any more lol" these days?

Just grand, like.

So I've heard. Incredibly easy to get out to the UK though haha

lol, still mad (upset, not insane mad) about the revolution?

OP here 3022

Yes 100% that bad. Find a few service numbers for the usernames.....science happens.... Boom you are in.

No because I actually know history and know that

1. The revolution was won by the French, Spanish, Dutch and Polish

and

2. Actually helped the British (bankrupted France and weakened Spain severely)

Bar Gibraltar (at least until we leave the EU, if we leave) everything is a fucking pain and it's the same as moving everywhere else. Bit baffling really.

DO NOT JOIN THE UK ARMY, find a job you like in civi street and you'll get more money less bullshit and FUCK SODEXO SHIT CUNTS

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Hack away my friends.

The British Army. The easiest army to hack in the world. Prove me wrong faggots
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