CHARLIE SHE SAYS

CHARLIE SHE SAYS
CHARLIE SHE SAYS

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CHOLLIE!

>these are just pictures of women with giant breasts

would you a Fatty McGoo?

>tfw you don't pay the troll toll
>tfw you don't get into the boy's hole

THIS GAME HAS GOHN OHN LOHNG ENUFF!

Yes, and I would a Aluminum Monster as well.

>tfw your toe knife is getting dull

YOU TELL HER
SHES A GODDAMN
HOOOOR

I've never been able to decipher what exactly he says before this, when he first walks in

You see how I got all these sweet pics of Ty Pennington from extreme home makeover? I'm going to become like him. I'm going to have that dude's life.

See that door right there, the one marked "Pirate", you think a pirate lives in there?

OUR STREETS ARE FLOODED WITH THE EJACULATE OF THE HOMELESS

Ah yes, I was going by as Trundle at the time.

Definitely one of the best lines from recent seasons

I care about the mannequin. I look like a jerk in front of those girls.

...

>LITTLE
>GREEN
>GHOULS
>BUDDY

They LIED to me.

YOU DON'T PUT A MAN'S NAME ON A LIST JUST BECAUSE HE WON'T PUT HEROIN IN HIS ASS!!

My name's Rita...
Fire...s
Fires.

I hope they hogtie you, and then I hope they rape you, in their basement, for TEN years.

>Look, I didn't go to Vietnam just to have pansies like you take my freedom away from me.

You went to Vietnam in 1993 to open up a sweatshop!

>and a lot of good men died in that sweatshop

my sides were never the same again

>I'm a full of rapist

one of my favorite lines from anything

>and I'm about to show you the white hot cream of an 8th grade boy

"I'm don't have a bucket list dude, because I'm not dying"
>Everybodies dying, bitch. Lets get you some fruit

THERE IS A SPIDER... spider... (spider)

youtube.com/watch?v=uGYVwUYLEeI

BINROY
I
N
R
O
Y

>tfw no country cousin

Is Dee the best or not?

i miss old mac, before he became just some le gay religious man in denial caricature

man, I used to have some jean shorts like that too.
I slept in them shits, man.
eventually I blew the crotch outta them things.
you can't where 'em every day and expect them to hold up.
that's some nice ass denim too. I miss them shorts.
BUT YOU GOTTA TAKE EM OFF EVERY NOW AND THEN. GOTTA TAKE EM OFF, SON.

DONT swim to europe.

>Hello and welcome to project badass volume 16...as you can see, the mattress are stacked three high...creating a safe, but still amazingly badass landing zone

>1...2...3...badass

...

you still get the feeling he wants to bang us?

That's what this is all about, right?

>in The Lord Of The Rings movies, Ian McKellen plays a wizard. Do you think he goes home at night and shoots laserbeams into his boyfriend's asshole? I don't think so dude.

>Dee...you know you look like?
>Like a bird?
>Yeah you always look like a bird...but you know what I was go-
>Like a bird lady? Covered in bird shit? Eating cake?
>Dee slow down

NOBODY LOOK NOBODY LOOK NOBODY LOOK NOBODY LOOK NOBODY LOOK NOBODY LOOK NOBODY LOOK

>First of all, I wasnt spider-man, I was man-spider.

Tom cruise is a midget, but he plays guys that are normal size in movies.

>You've been really stressed so I'm taking you for a spa day.
>A what day?
>A spa day.
>W-What's spa? I feel like you're starting to say a word but not finishing it. Are you trying to say spaghetti? Are you taking me for a spaghetti day?
>No Charlie, I wasn't trying to take you for a spaghetti day.

holy shit

dennis is spiderman

And nobody's buying that either.

>I was wondering, what's your spaghetti policy here?

>What's your spaghetti policy?

>Do, uh, do wasps make honey?
>No, wasps do not make honey.
>All right, we'll I'm gonna check it out anyway. There could be something delicious in here that wasps do make, and I want that.

>tfw Dee will never take you for a spaghetti day

>Hey, did Frankie ever tell you about the time that I threw him off the John Wanamaker Building?

>You son of a bitch.
>He told us about that.
>I can't-- I can't listen to another goddamn story.
>...I don't want to hear that story.

I heard the guy hangs dong

>I didn't catch any rape references. Nothing about spiders, or ghouls.
>Why would there be rape?
>You're always talking about rape and spiders.
>Well you guys misinterpret it but...

>Just gonna pop a nice H on this box so we know there's hornets in it

>tfw getting off

He says "Stop Charlie" but in a dreadful, dreadful accent. It's so bad that Netflix's subtitles just pretend nothing was said at all. The first subtitled words from Dennis there are "This game has gone on long enough".

>There's too much of you.
>There's not too much of me.
>He would never finish the job.
>He'd get the job done.
>He'd spend his whole night hacking and sawing. Then he still wouldn't be done. He would open his box of tools and say, "What tools am I gonna use for this?"
>He could use normal tools.
>He'd look at that pile of bones and flesh and say... "How many people have I murdered tonight?" "How is this just one person?"

god i love this fucking show

youtube.com/watch?v=shVNw1g9fug

It is my go-to "comfy, playing in the background to fill the silence" netflix show.

This is one of the best episodes this show has ever had. Dennis's part was so great that I don't even remember what everyone else was doing. Was it the crowtein thing?

FIGHT MILK

For bodyguards

>Not losing your shit at Charlie and Frank constantly bowing to the nips

and Charlie

Oh Sandra you dumb bitch.

>cutting the crust off this shit sandwich

What's the best college for Bird Law?

By bodyguards

This is the best show on television.

If you have a differing opinion you are literally a hoor and need to go in the traysh

CROW'S EGG

It was mostly sexual

Wanna have sex?

>Your son is your coke dealer?
>He's dependable

DAYMAN~

Entry level sunny

This one, the way Charlie acts. Fucking kills me everytime. It might be one of my favourite Charlie's line.

That and

>What....are...you ?
>MURTAUGH

Am I missing out on this show?

>yfw you realize that pretty much all the best episodes are Dennis centered

yes

>mfw I accept him as the golden god

C'MON RIDE THE TRAIN

Suicide is badass!

...

youtube.com/watch?v=sCZhAUmEVqc

Psycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est? Fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa

Judy Greer is fucking sexy, you're damn right I would.

JUST PLAY THE MOVIE CAUSE I'M HAVING A CONVERSATION HERE
...
All day.

Are you kidding me? You can peel your own apple Charlie.

Let's play Connect Four
Nah, a lot of counting
But you connect four and you win the game

you can see how hard Charlie is trying to hold back his laugh

>Paddy's Pub ehh STRESS BALL. Ehh? You give it a squeeze whenever you feel any tension.
>Right- oh goddammit Frank THAT'S JUST AN EGG

if you watch the gag reel that scene alone took like 12 cuts and thats just the ones they put into the reel

>We berated her for 2 straight hours
>it was serious stuff too, like WAY over the line
>the kind of stuff that cuts you to the core, I think she tried to commit suicide after it
>yeah she did, I saw it but I didn't tell you about it

punished Dee

What's the waitress' problem

I WILL SET YOU ON FIRE LIKE THE LAST BITCH WHO CROSSED ME

JUST TWO MEN SHARING THE NIGHT ONES ON TOP AND ONES ON BOTTOM
Charlie is the greatest character ever made

Severe drug and alcohol abuse
having no career beyond being a waitress
no friends

SAY GOODBYE TO THESE!

next season when?

>let me pop a quick H on this box this way we all know that it's filled with hornets