Ask a cat anything

Ask a cat anything.
Yes, I am actually a cat.
Meow.

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You like fish heads?

What animal are you?

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How are you able to type with paws?

would you let me rub your belly?

Why are cats such dicks ?

Meowwww!!!!!!

Catticus-felineus meowww!

???

youtube.com/watch?v=JKDtUzRIG6I

youtube.com/watch?v=J---aiyznGQ

becase you dont know how to treat them, thats literally the same as asking, "why did a dog bite me when i tried to pet it?"

because they are animals and you should know better, because they cant.

Mrrrreow *claws!*

as i thought.

Hssss!!!

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But they literally are dicks to everyone and everything, by default. A cat my grandma had for 10 years attacked her one day for no reason, her leg was bleeding so bad she had to go to the hospital. Also, they're constantly murdering everything, but that's their nature I guess.

Because this is my cousin and he'll fuck you up.

well they are predators, but you are still not seeing that they are animals and uncapable of thought.
I could give you a list of reasons why dogs are dicks, but you would just get all autistic on me so im not gonna.

The cat must have had a reason to attack her and my honest guess, considering that she was old is that she stepped on the cat and she just didnt want to admit it, or maybe the cat was old and confused, idk, whatever the reason is you cant just go calling all cats dicks because of a story you heard.

Korin, give me your keys. You're drunk.

But my name is Kiko. Meowww

Are you on the web? Are you batting at the strings inside my head?

Meow?
Illuminati confirmed.

youtube.com/watch?v=AAfpq6EPKck

Do you own any hats?

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Well, I am a culiflower, and I can't talk, so I'm not able to ask you anything. Sucks to be culiflower.

sorry but you being able to type kind of breaks the illusion for me :(

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What does pussy taste like.

CANNIBULISM MEOW!
How does human taste? MEOW!

so.. you a boy cat, or a girl cat?

"Hey cat, why are cats such dicks."
"Why human? Because FUCK YOU, that's why."

huehuehue

its a privilege if a cat let you rub its belly

Yes.

Pink privilege.

What are you looking at when you're scratching the walls and shit?

pss pss pss *rubs fingers together* over here kitty pss pss

Cat's have xray and thermal vision. You stupid humans don't???

well witch is it? i would like to know

HEY!!!
HEY!!!!!!

WHAT IS THAT IN YOUR HAND!!!!???!?!?!!!???!!

yeah they see shit flying around that us humans cant persevere

yes i know, it took years to gain my cats trust to the point i dont have to be afraid of claws when i rub her belly.
but cats are different, the male cats we've had seem to enjoy it way more.

...oh ya know.. gust some... catnip.

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i laa dat shit mayn

Who do cats always throw up on the carpet?

(goddamnit)

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are you a indoor or outdoor cat?

Carpet is love.
Carpet is life.
Carpet is where I- huuu-huuu-huuu-huuu-huuuu *harffff*

Mice and birds.

What are doors?

More importantly, why do cats insist on coming back inside before throwing up if they happen to be outside when the urge to puke hits?

(^=ᴥ=^)

those big tall swinging things that teleport you into different rooms, us humans can use them whenever we want. unlike your kind.

Those are the walls that humans can open briefly and go through.

I like it

WITCHCRAFT!!!

Yeah lol I have 3 and I've never seen them throw up outside.

Pic is them when they were young.

ill show you witchcraft *picks you up by the scruff*
yeah-h what now pussy cat.

can you do this?

my cat brings me huge fuck-off rats and leaves them by my front door. think there some kind of gift or something.

you feed me, now i feed you, meowww!! ^__^

Yes.

cat gender. duh.

holy shit its not that hard! do you or do you not have a dick!.

how many rats did you eat today

Gross!!!
I just kill for pleasure.

whats your favorite spot for pats?
chin, behind the ears, the top of your head, the bottom of your back??

that's dark man.

i havent seen a single bird or mouse go to waste yet and i've seen quite a few dead ones, what are you on about?

If your cat doesnt eat the rats they catch, you are feeding them too much, this, is a fact.

fuck cats, they need to die

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Ever wondered how it feels if someone just hammered a rusty nail in one of those eye gaugs ?.

>t. dog

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youtube.com/watch?v=thYHQFZL82U

HAHAHAH little faggot

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That's a big cat

kek. do this one

cat organ

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liveleak.com/view?i=5e8_1425739036

Happy Caturday !

SON OF A BITCH!

Thanks m8. Here's a Floersch for you.

>liveleak

Not clicking that shit, doggo.

lol you cunt

seen it before in webm form countless times, you propably have too.
but you dont need to mind him, he is just a cat hating cunt who got clawed from kicking the cat or something, a stupid motherfucker in other words.

>mfw they always leave mouse intestines full of shit lying around

Cats are weak pieces of CRAP.
A loin bites it in half without even using a 10th of its strenght. HAHAHAHAHA.

somewhere I heard that Jews were nicknamed "rats".

And that all those Disney stories about rats outsmarting cats are the vengeance of the Jews who control the media.

only seen that a couple of times, but dont lie, you wouldnt eat rat shit either.

Ever gone fishing? yeah you dont eat every part of the fish and they dont even have bones, mice do.

lost

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Go away doggo. No one likes you here.

logan click post a reply you faggot

kek

how much did the hola cost.