long time autist first time poster. Mum cleaned my room and found my home made wooden dildo. She hasnt said anything to me but i know she saw it because it was in a different spot. How do i get out of this without coming off as a faggot
Long time autist first time poster. Mum cleaned my room and found my home made wooden dildo...
Pretty basic construction op, very little prostate stimulation.
Tell her you gave up MLP for hunting vampires.
Buy a real dildo. When she finds the real one she'll be relieved to know that this one is "not actually a dildo"
Topkek. What about splinter m8? Also if you took the time and initiative to whittle a fucking dildo, youre gay. So don't worry about her realizing youre gay, cause youre gay.
>wooden dildo
That sounds really painful. Imagine the splinters.
I wouldn't guess it was a dildo
Grow up. Clean your own God damn room. And while you're at it get a job and move out of home.
I read that as you found your mom's dildo
Then I realized it's your dildo and I thought you were a girl
Then I realized you're a dude... I need to stop drinking
Could easily pass as a really big pencil
dont worry drunkfag #2 here forfor keks
>fuck
she probably doesn't even know that it's a dildo.
why wood?
"Mom, have you seen my vampire stake?"
Kek
Top fucking kek
Is that a mother fucking table leg?
Tell her you were trying to make a carpenter pencil
Samefagging
Tell her it is the nose cone for a model rocket you are building (Which you now have to build)
How long have you been stupid?
Might pass
Tell her that you were making a few plumbs for shop class and forgot where you put it.
It works on two levels:
1.Woodworking is manly af!
2. You're actually making notches for your pleasure, homofag.
how much you makin on your stocks?
About 200-400 a day. I swing trade
nice
newbie here, i just got into stocks the other day. how often do you buy the dip
Its a part for some bullshit project your working on
>5 tabs open, all Sup Forums
>Friday night
>normalfag not detected
Very often. Morning dip 9:30 to 9:45 on a well studied stock is the way to go.
kek never claimed to be. Im an obtuse motherfucker
OP back to answer some questions. Its sanded to 800 grit so no splinters. I have real dildos but wanted somthing wider. One guy said is that a table leg. It was once lol. I said it was a home made exhaust plug for my dirt bike, pic related. I think she bought it. Maybe dildo never even crossed her mind because who the fuck has a wooden dildo
Once i buy a lathe i can add ribbing
you have one.
...
if dubs wooden dildo up pooper
>>Make three more and use them as legs for a tv dinner tray. Vola your off the hook
I dont think she will have thought it was a dildo
The fact youre male will make it even less likely she saw it as a dildo, she'll probably just think
>wonder what this is for
You may be a sexual degenerate who grew up in the internet but your mom isnt and didnt assume what you would
Make 4 of them and use them as legs for a tiny laptop table. Make them detachable to use them for their initial intended purpose.
then stuff all 4 up the pooper. take pictures.
Buy shitloads of books about vampires. Solved.
You thought about putting down a couple coats of varnish? Could be cheap insurance against splinters.
Tell her you're worried about vampires.
No.2 kek
>whittle a fucking dildo
my sides
Get a gf/get caught jerking it to straight porn.