Hello, my name is Ted Mondal, I'm 74, and I've been retired quite a few years now. Today my son set up my computer...

Hello, my name is Ted Mondal, I'm 74, and I've been retired quite a few years now. Today my son set up my computer, but left before I could ask much about it. So I asked his best friend, still finishing the cup of coffee I'd made him, what I can do. He was ever so polite, had a huge smile on his face! He told me that "boards.Sup Forums.com/b" was a great place to start, so here I am! Hello everyone! What should I do on my new computer? :)

...

Is it that obvious. Right I'm gonna go kms my life again had no meaning

Hi Ted! Don't come back here, it's really not a good place to make friends and people are pretty mean to be honest. I'd suggest maybe other forums?

i believe you misstyped, you currently find yourself on "boards.Sup Forums.ORG/b" please correct this mistake as it would be best for everyone

Even if you retired twenty years ago, computers were commonplace at the time. Sounds like weak bait.

>Tries to pretend they're op
>should kys

Hi Ted, welcome to Sup Forums. It's a friendly place, where everyone hates niggers and jews, and there's lot of clown and midget porn.

Really? I'm not sure why he'd say that then. Do you know where I can go that's better?
-Ted

Show us your dick, Ted.

There's a difference between them? I thought it didn't matter. Thank you though for helping me out!
-Ted

I don't know of any that are especially nice for older people, but I know you can always do small-time social media like Pinterest, Tumblr, and Reddit!

I've worked as an artist most my life, and made a living off farming. I was never really around them, I mean, I've seen them, but I've never known how to use them. So I can only go by what he said.
And, may I ask, what do you mean by "bait"?

All you old people are racist as fuck, so you'll fit in just fine.

Are you sure? Most seem quite friendly!
-Ted

Maybe try farmersonly.com ?

Isn't that a gay porn site?

no. its a rural dating site

Well, I don't like niggers or Jews, they're dirty creatures. But Porn? That's not ok. I hope you'll stay away from that
It'll rot your brain
-Ted

Not a single kek

Youll fit in just fine here.

The people here are really not terribly nice once you get to know them, no : (

Watch your mouth!
How can I delete him from my page?
-Ted

Did you ever murder anyone, Ted? How can you deny that you killed people to live so long? Everybody thats ever been killed was killed in the past. They were killed by people that were not killed. People that were not killed grew old. You are old. Thus you must have killed someone because lots of people were murdered in your past. HOW MANY?

This is now a porn thread.

Black Jew Porn

What about children, Ted? How many have you molested? Everybody that has ever been molested says old men molested them. Youve been old for years now. That makes you guilty to me. So, HOW MANY?

delete system32

Kek

>refuses to show dick
>is a murderer
>is a child molester.

Is Ted /ourguy??

I like the sound of "Reddit"! It's like "read it"
Haha
I might go have a look there after I've replied to everyone
(I don't want to be rude to the nice people who've taken time out of their day to reply :)
-Ted

Oh no, I couldn't do that to my lovely wife, thank you for the suggestion though!
-Ted

Reddit is where child molesters go, Ted. Sup Forums is where we expose them? Have you heard about pizzagate? What do you think about pizza?

:( Darn, they all seem so sweet though
-Ted

It's actually a reference to the Communist Party. They're all devout Maoists over at Reddit, determined to use cultural marxism to subvert traditional Western values.

Reddit is for lonely faggots

No, I haven't, I'm not sure why you'd accuse me of something so serious.
-Ted

I'm going to pretend I didn't see that. It's not up to me to judge you. God will do that.
-Ted

Why are you guys saying this? I'm not a bad guy! I promise I've never done any of that!
-Ted

What does that do?
Is that how I delete the bad replies of my page?
-Ted

Kek? Do you mean kick?
-Ted

How does this photo make you feel, Ted? (This is a test)

Please stop!! I'm not any of that, I promise you!!
-Ted

Kek is a false god these kids praise instead of Christ Jesus. They think its funny and ironic when Ted and I know it is blasphemy. Tell them what blasphemy is, Ted.

Even Jeebus liked to party.

It is? That doesn't sound good
No I haven't heard of pizza gate, sorry
I quite like pizza! It's a nice and easy meal :)
-Ted

Reminds me of my marriage
-Ted

Wait, do you mean child molesters and commies? I think we should call the police on them
Do you know how to report that to them?
-Ted

Sup Forums likes cheese pizza the best, so starting a thread asking about cheese pizza is a great way to make friends.

I KNEW IT!!!!!


RED ALERT, BOYS!!! WE CAUGHT ANOTHER ONE!!!!

That is not me!! Someone is stealing my identity! My wife is a beautiful Christian woman! Not that disgusting inbred!
-Ted(real)

FIRE QUANTOM TORPEDOES! READY POINT DEFENSE GUNS AND FULL POWER TO PARTICLE BATTERIES!

Are you sure? Some of these people seem really mean.
-Ted(real)

A Sup Forums Gold account will prevent that from happening.

It's because you're new, it's a type of hazing. You went through hazing in high school, right?

thats just the nature of the internet ted. Its a place of true free speech, however positive or negative it may be.

Another what?? Pizza is great! What's wrong with it?
-Ted(real)

Can I also use it to find the naked kids?
-Tex(real)

XD nigga wut?!

See, if you were real you wouldve said it reminds you of your Grandchildren. You said your son was "ever so polite with a huge smile on his face", which made me suspicious of your true identity from the start. Now this slip up. Nope, Ted. I dont believe you are Mr. Mondal. I suspect you are Mr. Mondals son trying to frame Mr. Mondal as mentally incompetant in order to seize control of his assets. Theres simply no other reason for a son to direct his elderly father here. So, its one or the other. Either way your son is out to frame you. This is a child porn website. No lie.

I don't know if I should trust you
-Ted(real)

Well heck. You got me.
-Ted (real)

Stop it! I don't like naked children!
Please stop
Ted(MonReal)

I like boipucci the most desu.

-Ted (hyper real)

I'm not complaining
Don't stop
Ted(MonReal)

I don't understand
This is me, Ted
-Ted(MonReal)

We. Are. Ted
Ted(The Collective

These two are not me.
Please don't listen to them
-Ted(MonReal)

I first killed a man in 1955. He looked Korean. Later, I learned he was Thai. They arent really human so I dont call myself a murderer. Just a hunter without a license.

-Ted (alpha male)

WE ARE THE BORG! LOWER YOUR SHIELDS AND PREPARE TO BE ASSIMILATED! RESISTANCE IS FUTILE!

-THE BORG COLLECTIVE

Please
Please stop
I'm just trying to learn the internet
Please
Find it in your hearts
-Ted, Actual

No please now these jokesters are impersonating me again
-Ted(Real!!!)

That's because you don't have a 4 chan gold account.

...I need my diaper changed desu.

- Ted (Original Midnight Express)

>What should I do on my new computer? :)

1. Get Fightcade
2. Google MAME roms for Super Street Fighter Turbo, King of Fighters 2002, SNK vs Capcom: SvC Chaos etc.
3. Put the zip files in your Fightcade ROM folder
4. Run Fightcade
5. Git gud

That's not me again
Please friend
Stop
-Ted

You kids expect too much from George Lucas.

-Ted (Weeping Gorilla model)

>What should I do on my new computer? :)

1. Get Steam
2. Go buy a Steam card somewhere
3. Buy something dope

Ah koochie Koo! I am the walrus!

-Ted (w/ LSD)

Use your own name you coward!
I'm sick of this
Who are you??
-Ted

Yes I've heard of a game my son said is called makeyoucumtwice. Sounds Finnish.

I am Ted!
Stop impersonating me!
-Ted

We are you Ted. And you. You are us.
Ted(that goes without saying though)

>What should I do on my new computer? :)

1. Register a username on www.kongregate.com
2. Find a game called "Monster's Den: Book of Dread"
3. Play the fuck out of it

I was thinking more something like Earth Overclocked, or the Elder Scrolls games or Seven Kingdoms II HD, but whatever floats your boat, man.

Back on topic, (these kids are such smarties, Ted).
We need inspiration, Ted. Many of us are virgins in our 20s and 30s. How do we find a good virgin wife? How old should she be considering our ages? Did you ever marry a young teenage girl by any chance? Many people your age did but they tell us it is wrong. The Virgin Mary was just 13 wasnt she? How do you explain Gods taste in girls compared to your expectations of us??? is being a virgin this late in life a sign we will live as long as you or will we drop dead when our sperm crystallizes within our male sacs? What about military service? Should we give up our disability checks to join the army and lose our virginity with German girls? What would Ted do?

I wonder sometimes why I am always talking to myself.

-Ted the Only

Well golly gee I've been with my wife forever so I couldn't imagine being in your situation but just remember that no matter what there's always hentai
-Fucking Ted

>What should I do on my new computer? :)

1. Go on YouTube
2. Look up "Succ Unleashed"
3. Click the first video
4. Watch the whole thing

Where did I go?

-Ted (echo)

Goodbye, thanks to those who actually helped
And the ones who didn't should be ashamed
-Ted

Bye bye me.

-Ted

No Ted! We were only joshing you! Dont go! tell us about Vietnam!

-NOT Ted

Ted, I think it's time to fucking grow a pair and grab that hanky on your desk and just masturbate to gay midget porn. We all know YOU want to. Of course we do. Because we're you Ted.
-Ted

This was not a Ted post! Ted has a wife and no need for midgets or choking his chicken!

-NOT Ted

This is really making me miss both my Grandpas.

-NOT Ted either.

/thread

Ted hasn't ever fucked his wife in 25 years. A man has needs. And gay midget porn will suffice his needs.
-Ted

In other threads we are all user

ITT we are Ted

Shit
We're all Ted...