G'morning user

g'morning user.
i hope you slept well.
tell me why you will not KILL YOURSELF today.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/Ra26qAXkrxI
youtu.be/SPnohTteETs
youtu.be/NRFTSh56gEE
youtu.be/yGaAjGEpp00
youtu.be/GMR2itymFW0
miscopy.com/4863/sexual/naked-negro-massive-dick-rummage-through-trash-bin/
youtu.be/xWIAqAwwGDc
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

Because I don't need to kill myself. Nature will do the work for me.

Because life's good, yo.

cause attendance is mandatory

true
glad to hear that.
it is.
to what ?

getting some pussy later today.
ask me again tomorrow though.

I have ten bottles of 80% vodka that need drinking.

g'luck slaying that pussy man.
if you do that all at once, you will be dead.

I enjoy living, mate

Plus i start college in 4 days. I won't leave this world without creating something. I want to make cool gadgets and shit.

So, why haven't you killed yourself, man?

thanks bro.
lets hope her husband doesn't find out.

forbidden fruit.
Even better.

youtu.be/Ra26qAXkrxI

Because I have a date with your mom.

his moms black

yea I can probably get the will to live for about a month or two off this latest distraction.

Rick and morty season 3, ya shiteatin' tumblrfag

youtu.be/SPnohTteETs

I have a skinny penis to pull...and memes to invent...I already created something great...
youtu.be/NRFTSh56gEE

>I'm married to a beautiful woman who's my best friend
>we have an active and satisfying sex life
>I have three wonderful kids I adore
>I live in a comfortable home, drive a nice car and own both
>I have a well paying job I find fulfilling
>I work with nice people who respect me
>I have a fairly affluent lifestyle but live well within my means
>I'm on pace to retire in my 50s
>I'm in good overall health
>My credit rating is over 800

please be nice to her.
hey, how did you know ?
cool man, g'luck.
that will be cool.

Why do you want to be some chick's sidepiece?

cause its better then paying for it....
youtu.be/yGaAjGEpp00

Stop making this thread

I'm having a nice day, tbh

Btw can you give me source on that gif? Looks like the kind of porn my gf would enjoy

>i have
Have you ever read the book of Job ,son ?
You'll be amazed how quickly you'll realise nothing is yours.

dont really know op, family, firends, some girls..... how about you?

Because I am saving up for a house for my family and so I have a garage/backyard to build a forge/workshop in. I want to make swords and armors. I want to make things that are actually worth something, I own nothing of value and I'd rather make something of value than try to buy something of value, as ultimately, I can spend and spend and spend but it won't bring me anything lasting, something to pass down in my family.
Also I intend on making a blade, using it to behead an ex friend who decided he's too good for me, and then melting it back down and turning it into a memento of sorts. Maybe plate his skull with the metal. I would like to keep the skull.

And he also gets it all back

Those are really your only options?

Video source?

id love to have his dick
anyone jelly?

Sauce please sir.

No, mine is genuinely better. Although it's also pierced so that then becomes a matter of opinion. But size wise in both length and girth, mines bigger. So no, not really.

LOL the first one that comes to mind thinking of you faggots...but really you pay for it one way or another...

Music keeps me alive

He gets it all back because he puts God above all.Luckily God is in charge and rewards him.
If you put your pride before all it will certainly not bring back shit whenever you lose it. So tread lightly.

everyone's dick here is bigger then everyone else for Christ sake its the fucking internet..

youtu.be/GMR2itymFW0

Its too much work, im a patient man i can wait.

A little over 8 inches in both length and girth, I've measured time and time again. And according to those websites that compare your dick to the worlds dicks, only 1% of the worlds dicks are bigger. But even if I proved it, it's the internet and everything is false, so...

To be perfectly honest Sup Forumsro, today, I'd consider suicide. I have a Maxillary Breach in my right sinus, with full bony destruction, due to an un-diagnosed sinus infection. I'm on medication, but the surgical specialist who COULD help me, won't even see me, because I don't have $500 out of pocket for his "office consultation" fees. Right now, I am in so much pain, I can barely breathe. Best case scenario, the infection clears, and this problem never progresses further than it already has. Worst case scenario, my sinus eventually collapses, abscesses, and fucking kills me. Today though, the pain is making suicide look like a viable option.

>over 8'' in girth

I wouldn't even want that, that sounds more painful than anything, also no anal ever

Fun facts:

>1. Christianity, Islam and Judaism basically all believe the same things and all endorse racism,sexism, homophobia, slavery and genocide.

>2. Unless the Babylonian gods are divine, the basic morality taught by these religions was already being taught without god. Most people don't want themselves or those they care about killed, hurt or robbed.

>3. There is little corroborating historical evidence jesus existed and none that he was magical. This is not to say jesus didn't exist, most historians acknowledge that Jesus was a real prophet. However, while most people don't have a historical record, someone who walked on water and made the blind see would have.

>4. While Jesus had a good message, it was not original or particularly insightful. Love thy neighbor is common sense and was a common theme for prophets at the time.

>5. Jesus did not renounce any part of the OT. Instead he endorsed it. Matthew 5:17-19

>6. According to the bible Jesus's reason for becoming man was the fulfillment of the OT prophecy and the forgiveness of sins. Without the OT there is no need for Jesus to be made man. Also, without the OT virtually nothing is a sin since what are sins are found in the OT.

>7. The bible codifies archaic morality of 2500 years ago. The fact that most Christians don't agree with the bible's teachings regarding slavery and women being property, speaks about mankind's ability to evolve morality and against religion's effectiveness at teaching it.

>8. Christianity, Judaism and Islam all make scientific claims which have been disproven. All of these religions have a history of persecuting those who disprove these claims.

American detected

LOL right alls that matter about dick size is where you stick it...really....and cup size if ya play sports...other then that..he got us beat....

miscopy.com/4863/sexual/naked-negro-massive-dick-rummage-through-trash-bin/

Haha it can be painful for the women. And no, there's still anal. She just makes these weird faces and noises and cries a little which just makes it harder
Although literally blowjobs are only the head. It's all that fits in her mouth

i'm a pussy

probably the only intresting post ive read today

Congrats, you've figured me out.

He probably can't get it hard enough to have decent sex, tho

although looks like its swollen from lack of support is all

tbh im sorry for you user

Because every day you tell me you hope i slept well. Usually i dont but its nice to know some one hopes i did.

I don't think I'd like that, I have a pretty thin dick (5'') and tbh I'd just want it to be thick around 6'' but not much more since I like to pound my gf and it'd hurt too much

But hey, good for you if you still enjoy yourself

Fuckin' Obama. I USED to have decent health insurance. As soon as Obamacare made it mandatory to be covered, my job stopped offering it as a perc. Now, if I were to pay for my own coverage, I'd be throwing almost 3/4 of my weekly pay toward my premiums. I can't fucking afford that, but I still earn too much to qualify for state aid. If I ever met him in person, I would beat the BRAKES off that fucking nigger Obama.

Jesus dude. You should move to Canada. We got awesome healthcare.

Health care should be free everywhere.
Health insurances are subhuman idiocies.
Yes, usa should learn form europe

alright
glad you having a nice day.
thos are all good things to have.

I've been feeling really shitty lately. I've been a NEET since I graduated 2 months ago and have been looking for work since the start of the year but haven't even been getting interviews, just rejection.

I also moved out of a share house with friends into a place with my GF around the same time I graduated. I'm now feeling left out socially from my friends since they don't ask me to hang out since it's often inconvenient for me to.

This has made me pretty miserable and not fun to be around which causes a strain on my relationship with my GF.

She's also pretty miserable since she's unemployed but she's at least got a circle of friends who will hang out with her and she's at least getting interviews.

I know my GF is trying her best to help me but I like my space and she likes constant reassurance, it's a tough compromise.

As to why I haven't killed myself, I couldn't do that to my family or GF. I love them all to much to put them through that. Plus things aren't that bad, it's just a rough patch.

>thos are all good things to have.

>Living THIS vicariously through an anonymous image board.

I wish I had a good reason to live. So my only answer is I am too much of a wuss to off myself.

Cause Ive got a philosophy paper due at midnight and im too busy trying to figure out what the fuck Plato was thinking when he proposed the tripartite theory of the soul in relation to justice to off myself

I am saving my death for the civil war. I plan to die gloriously wearing a belt made of liberal scalps surrounded by hot brass, a warm gun in my hand, and the smell of gunpowder in my nostrils. Its going to be fucking glorious.

got a third job interview this morning. it pays $25/hourly.

ugly slut wants to fuck me on monday.

maybe i'll wait another week....

Because I have a new boyfriend who treats me like his little boi, cuddles me all the time and helps me with anxiety.
I might dump him because he's 10 year older than me

waiting for Eagles to win super bowl
I might live forever

>thumbs up m8

If your major is philosophy you might actually want to kill yourself now and save years of misery and uselessness.

Gotcha beat Sup Forumsro. I'm waiting on the Jets to win one.

my kids.

I'm a Bengals fan...

Who cares? My girlfriend is much older than me, but I love her & she's my best friend. Sure, there are other fish in the sea, but none of them will be her, that's the point.

Seems like a good relationship. Why you wanna leave.

porn is disgusting unless its a really hot bitch which is like never.

Because he's going to leave the country and never come back in 2 years.

Could be worse. Could be a Browns fan...

Oh.. that makes a bit more sense. Sorry user.

At the last moment when I am low on ammo with the enemy closing in I will shout "To hell with you commie bastards!!!" and take as many of them to hell with me as I can in a holocaust of fire and death. Not going to lie just thinking about it gives me the weirdest boner.

OK I"m new here, trying to understand the psychology of the internet. Because it seems to have the capacity to fuck us, even if it isn't real. So many geeks that I know make sense now that I've seen Sup Forums. The pasty skin, desperate expression, maladjusted political views. So who are you?

Do you even ever go outside?

I'm the guy that SHOULD be listed on your birth certificate. But your mom just couldn't bring herself to tell your "dad" that she let me fuck her before he did on their wedding night.

leave

I am not gonna kill myself today because I look better then this guy and im not in South America...

youtu.be/Ra26qAXkrxI

Because I have work today.

Dude, is the ugly slut a good thing or are you just listing this as a fact? Asking for a friend.

yesterday I found out I'm being sued so I have work to do.

Like, because I'm new here or so I don't turn into a pathetic waste of space?

Kill the person suing you.

You must be old af

Because your mother's a whore. That's why.

Every day, I even talk to people, work a good job, do volunteer work in my community, and served in the military.

Nope. In a top 20 business school that just happens to be Jesuit so Ive got a philosophy/theology common core to go with it

so you don't turn into a pathetic waste of space

So this is this whole banter thing that goes on here. I'm bored.

+1 Int for not being a total retard getting a useless degree.

Me too. Except I subcontracted for the military. So you want to kill a bunch of people, eh?

youtu.be/xWIAqAwwGDc

yuppers this thread is dead....someone got something better then your momma jokes

I kind of am already tho, tbh. What do you get out of this stuff?

Made almost 3k from Bitcoin in less than 2 months, currently only need to work 5 hours for 3 days a week.

Probably the only reason, life isn't 100% shit at the moment.

I'm at work. just here to pass the time. some new fucked up shit here sometimes. a lot of the same material tho

Uhh. Pretty sure the ugly slut is a good thing. Not sure though.

GF left me a couple weeks ago so I'm looking for that rebound.

What a man wants and what needs to be done are two separate things. Were liberalism ever to succeed in ruining the nation with communism I am fully prepared to do what must be done. I would even find joy in it. As would anyone who swore the oath.

Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren’t lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.