Recovery thread
>What was your drug of choice?
>Were you a high or low bottom?
>How did you get sober?
>What's the best thing about your life in sobriety?
>How long sober do you have?
Recovery thread
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Bump, what's your story op?
For me, nothing luckily, but I'm from NH which has the biggest heroin epidemic in the country atm.
31 years on April 1st saved my life
My DOC's were opiates weed and alcohol.
I realized I had a problem when I started to use heroin, but felt miserable every day. I went to rehab for 84 days and now I live in sober living environment. I have 161 days.
Nice! Do you work a program? If so, do you help other addicts/alcoholics in any way?
would like to say yes but not not really. did for a bit but have not been to a meeting in years.
I've heard of plenty of people with decades of sobriety going back out. Does using/drinking ever cross your mind?
Congrats! I self-medicate with weed and have dabbled in LSD, shrooms, DMT, and coke (threw it out while high on acid). Any pointers for how to stay responsible or tell when it is becoming a problem?
Usually it's a problem when you want to stop but can't stay stopped. I used against my will, and couldn't function without some sort of mind-altering substance. People who truely wish to stop but can't can never do it on their own, because willpower has failed.
Cocaine
High
Went back to school. Quit drugs
My beautiful wife and kids
15yrs
ya i have see people go out ya it crosses my mind but just try to think it through
Also, a lot of addicts/alcoholics in the beginning of trying to get clean want to learn how to use/drink responsibly. If you're trying to get sober, contolled drinking/using (i.e. spacing out usage, switching drugs/brands) will fail 100% of the time and you'll be right back to the position you were in prior.
I'm still trying to get sober after 10 years of alcoholism. I have no idea why I still do it.
So nice to see there are people here who have long-term sobriety. It's quite reassuring.
Because you have alcoholism. It never gets better, only worse. If you want to stop, now is the time.
Been using shit for the last 18 years.
Finally kicked opiates roughly 5 years ago, relocated down south for work, and switched to meth.
After kicking years of meth use and roughly a few months of clean time, I heard about ordering RC's online and went to town.
Alcohol + Benzo RC combo was enough to cause a week long black out of completely destroying what little life and security I had left.
I was painting pictures with blood when picked up and brought to the hospital. I have zero memory.
finally decided on treatment, and sober living, and have over 8 months now.
I also firmly believe addiction is a choice and not a disease. It's an easy way out to not have to deal with anything, but it's still a choice.
Alcohol
High or low bottom?
Detox
Being able to remember things again. I couldn't remember conversations I had the night before.
I'm 6 months in.
Yeah I really wish I would stop. At this point I'm just tired of struggling with it. I wish I could move to a dry town or something.
For a lot of people they can't choose to not use, because they are using against their will and simply cannot stop. That's why support from others is vital to recovery, because it can't be done alone.
H.
H.
DiDnT.
NoThæng.
ZERØ.
That's where I'm at with it. It's like I'm possessed or something.
You can't run away from it. It will follow there. Trust me, I did the same thing.
>High or low bottom
Did you lose everything due to your usage? Like, rock bottom?
Where did you go? I'd also like to try in patient rehab but I can't afford it.
If you are willing to do whatever it takes to recover, then you are ready. You have to put all the energy into recovery that you did into your alcoholism. It's difficult, but if you want a better life then you gotta do the work.
I see. I was 8k in debt. My girlfriend left me. But I still had a job so was ok. My girlfriend supported me through detox and I have paid my debt off. If I didn't quit I would have lost it all.
I appreciate the feedback. Thank you. It's very easy to tell yourself, "I've got it under control." and even easier to spiral out of control. Again, thank you.
Yep. Isn't it true that AA has a 4 percent success rate though. It all seams kind of grim really.
I don't agree with that.
Granted, when I first got clean, I was miserable, completely depressed and had no drive to even get out of bed. All I could think about and all I wanted to do was get high. For months.
But you know what? I CHOSE not to do so, even though every bit of my existence was screaming at me to do it.
I hear this "I can't stop cuz of my disease" thing from a lot of people, and it seems a lot of them simply use it as an excuse to justify their relapse.
Alcohol when I was in the military. Burned too many bridges on it and became extremely reckless and destructive so it wasn't too hard for me to put down honestly, drank about a fifth a night and somehow didn't accidentally kill myself doing it over the span of 4 months, doesn't sound too bad but it was a dark place man. I don't miss it at all.
Mine was benzodiazepines
I don't know what high or low bottom means
I got clean by breaking up with my at the time gf, and doing other drugs to focus on Uni
Realized I was a fuck as I was taking my dogs pain meds
Sat in my room by myself and suffered (no rehab)
4years clean
ya 4% or 5% but still better then drinking your life away.
Absolutely, brother.
It's that low because many people are not honest with themselves, and try and get sneaky with their usage
If that works for you, then more power to you. But like I said, willpower has failed in many people who have a problem with drugs and alcohol.
Or is it because the 12 step thing is actually bullshit? I find AA to be too cult like. I've been to some meetings that actually creeped me out with all the mumbo jumbo and groupthink.
I think i am addicted to Sup Forums now too. not trying to be funny i just spend way to much time here.
And not dog as in dawg
Dog as in doggo
Any former alcoholics in here ever get sleep paralysis frequently while using? That combined with some of the shit I did while shitfaced kinda has me convinced that i was literally posessed as retarded as it sounds
Sounds like you were more of a heavy drinker then an alcoholic. Then again, you're only an alcoholic when you say you are.
Are you happy or content with where you are at today?
the 12 step thing is BS for some but i have seen it work with my own 2 eyes!
After nearly choking to death on my own vomit
Booz doesn't really sit well with me mentally
One shot and it usually wants to eject immediately
Clean date is 4/16/2006. My dad introduced me to NA after he had gotten clean and sober a few years before I did. His clean date is 5/03/2002. We're both still clean and sober to this day. His sponsor is my grand sponsor but my Pop's not my sponsor. My Dad and I went to the the NA World Convention when it was in San Antonio years back when ZZ Top and George Carlin did the Friday and Saturday night shows.
My best memory... literally saving someones life after she called me sobbing saying she had taken an entire bottle of pills. She still doesn't talk to me after I called an ambulance on her but it's okay. I'll lose a friendship to save a life.
Looks like you have made your mind up. It's not for everyone, but there's are reason it's been around this long and is all over the world. Not trying to sway you in any way.
Well in a way maybe anything can work but perhaps some of us just can't swallow it. I mean have you read the Big Book? Good lord most of it is just incoherent pseudo spiritual babbling. Yet I still think about going to meetings just for the support but I always shy away because of the culty aspect which just kind of repels me.
That's fair to say, kinda just used it as an escape but never felt like I'd die without it.
Thank you for your service. You did something good without expecting anything in return. What a way to get out of self!
I dunno even though I can't stand it I might still go back just to remind myself daily that I need to stop drinking.
Not necessarily. When I realized I was getting drunk alone too often I just decided to only drink socially and so far that's worked out great
yes like i said i will be 31 yeas sober on April 1.. have read is many times. you know you can always find fault if you are looking for fault.
You probably would've felt like that if you had kept going. Good on ya m8
So true. Eventually I realized it was all or nothing. Having just a few drinks made me insane. All I could think about was my next one.
You don't have to look far to find it in that book! I don't like the whole mentality of forcing myself to swallow a bunch of cult mumbo jumbo to get sober. Surely there's a better way!
that fine bro. not trying to sell you just telling you it worked for me. if you can find another solution more power to you!!
>trips get
That's what they are there for. To remind you what you don't want to go back to.
>so far
From what I've learned, this doesn't work. Then again, you don't want to get sober so it seems, just want to drink socially. That's perfectly ok.
I am not happy where I am today
The year after I cleaned up I felt great!
I had gone through a struggle
Lost my virginity
Partied like a monster
Skipped a semester of college
(The one after my dt's)
Made new friends after all of my old ones left me when I started smoking weed (one has been an alcoholic (like his mom) since he was an early teen)
Had my first three way
Got a cool job
Hot gf and went back to school and got good grades till I got sick with mono and tonsillitis
But now I'm 23 and working a shit job because I lost the drive I regained from bouncing back
But now I've regressed and feel like a teenager again
I'm so stuck user
I'm glad I'm off of drugs (for the most part)
I can use responsibly now
I'm not what I call a dabbler
Oh no I expected something in return. I expected her to be grateful. Never even got a 'thank you'. I'd do it the same way if I had to do it again though. I miss her sometimes but life sucks. Can't dwell on it... just gotta live for today.
I learned so much about adversity, and about victory.
Now when I try I never lose, and I never will
lol ya AA will NOT teach you to drink socially. fuck i wish!
Look for the similarities not the differences. It is worded pretty weird, but it was written in the 1930s.
This.
I was thinking I could always just interpret some of it in my own way. Like for instance I don't believe alcoholism is a disease just that it can feel like one. I'd say it's a psychological condition.
>psychological condition
AKA psychological Disease AKA mental illness
just my opinion
lol. Somehow I don't think people in the 1930s spoke that way. It's not worded weird it's just bombastic, pretentious and flakey.
Yeah that's not a disease in the way something like cancer is though.
Sounds like you might be a dry drunk and need to get out of your head. There are lots of ways to be of service to other people, which will make you feel much better. Just do the next right thing.
An expectation is a premeditated resentment!
why are you comparing it to cancer?
Dry drunk is AA cult speak. It's what they call anyone who manages to get sober without the magical 12 steps.
"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation -- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
"Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes."
not true Dry drunk is something different
Because cancer is a disease. Alcoholism isn't.
If that is your truth, so be it.
this is from the Big Book. and it will change your life if you let it
Then please do enlighten me as to what exactly that is. It sounds like bullshit on stilts to me.
It's a disease of the mind
ok not getting into a bait way. believe what you want
Truth is not relative.
You are definitely allowed to belive whatever you want.
No it's just a fact. Medical science isn't belief. There's no evidence to support alcoholism being an actual disease and forcing yourself to suspend rational thought and swallow that idea is dangerous.
ok when you get sober you change everything. you stop lie and stop fucking people over, cheating, all that stuff. a dry drunk is someone who does not drink but still lies and fucks people over
I have the acceptance prayer laminated and taped onto my wall. Love it!
It's true to you, is it not?
nice.
See that's total bullshit. This notion that everyone who is a drunk is a sociopath. That is Bill W projecting his own issues on to everyone else who drinks.
Oy. Not everything is a matter of belief. That's some flakey thinking. There is a tree outside my door. I don't "believe" it it just is.
6-26-15 is my sobriety date. DOC heroin and meth. But I qualify for many A's. I was a low bottom scumbag. My addiction took me places I never imagined I would be. There were no more lines in the sand to cross. I got sober this last time after waking up so miserable I didn't want to live anymore. I was tired and had no more options. I Burned every bridge I possibly could. The greatest things about recovery for me, is not waking up with the obsession to use. A relationship with a power greater then myself. Having serenity, and a purpose today. The only purpose I knew before getting sober was geting loaded. I'm grateful for life today.
See
no dude your missing the point. you can drink, you can drink a shit load. like every night and no be an alcoholic.
Awesome bro it get s even better!! keep going
That's fine too! It all comes down to you.
And the bullshit increases. Well thanks for reminding me why I can't stand AA.
no problem keep coming back it works if you work it.
So you're only an alcoholic if you drink a shit load and you're a sociopath? That's some convoluted shit right there.
It's not for people who want it, it's not for people who need it, it's for people who work for it!
Yes! Congratulations. A life you never thought possible, right?
I need a better job, a real degree and to move
Moved away for the summer after the year of my addiction and had such a wonderful time I hold it up there as one of my best summers EVER
Also my 2012 was more of my problem than anything else
She was paranoid schizophrenic, generalized anxious, PTSD, add
Anything you could wave an RX pad at
She was feeding me them
God I loved her so much but I'm So glad she's gone
not what i said.
You're an alcoholic when you say you are.
my 2012 gf*
+1 yup
Sure it is. You said a dry drunk is someone who still fucks people over after getting sober. That's neither here nor there. Someone can be a sociopath weather they are a drunk or not. Again that's just Bill W the sociopathic narcissist projecting.