Who doesn't like these sort of things?
Super Speed
Who doesn't like these sort of things?
Super Speed
I always have just enough money in my pocket
having to suck a large nigger dick everytime you post something on the internet
Only works with your eyes closed
But the pocket is in whatever pants you left at home
It's yours, and attached to the base of your spine like a tail
Infinite shits
It's always foreign currency
the infinity gauntlet is real and it's mine and it fits perfectly on my hand
Unless you're OP
You're a nigger
It only works during a sneeze
I want that too
and two copies for my friends...
Thu'um
Kek
It only works if you're asleep
Lawful good
My iq is over 160
The power to control the Earth's economy yayyyyssssss
> Super Speed
But when you use it you break your bones
Ability to shit a live otter at will
But you have to cut your foreskin if for that
You're Helen Keller disabled
Thats evil
but only when a pack of feral niggers fucks you and your loved ones in the ass.
lol
The power to cast magic missile
When you shit the Otter you will piss a Rat at Same time
Lose a finger every time you cast it
The Magic Missiles are a red rockets from old guys
I can change my sex whenever i want
In bed.
The ability to die on command.
Not other people.
Myself.
Can destroy the whole planet with my mind
You're a 1/10 no matter which sex you are
When in women form you look like dog the bounty hunter
After all fingers, do i start losing toes?
I see nothing wrong with this
Random planet every time
You have to eat a pound of your own shit before you can do it
We talking farm rat,city rat, or lab rat?
You are reincarnated ten minutes later, in the same body and bed
stop time
I don't see the downside
but every time you do it you get reincarnated somewhere in india
every time you use it's power, you gain 60 pounds of fat that you can't shed
Without dragons to kill, you can't absorb any souls to activate/evolve the abilities. That's just the actual limitation.
and everyone else is boosted to the equivalent of 10k IQ
except you can't spend or amass any amount of it for yourself / friends / family.
You immediate shit when time resumes, and it takes on the form of time elapsed
IE, you stop for a week, shit a weeks worth of shit at once
Can teleport the entirety of the Jewish population to mars
Mars gets colonozed when you do, and becomes better than earth
Why are homosexuals so obsessed with shit?
Ability to rewatch or relive any media or event in perfect clarity, within your mind
i can masturbate 500 times a day without dying
they call me the master bater
With the amount of planets in the universe the likelihood that you'll get the Planet you want is almost 0. Very strong power but it's utterly useless.
Fine, nigga will piss himself for the duration time was stopped
Stop time for an hour? Immediately piss for an hour straight
Demonic powers/soul siphoning
>inb4 edgy
Only happens when you get a paper cut on your pee hole
Gotta suck the soul out through the penis, and only the penis
That's rough
you're trapped in your head... becoming part of that media forever once you do
Still has worth i think
Let me rephrase, why are homosexual obsessed with defecation?
the otter returns up your ass in five minutes time
you're immediately very very hungry after one cast
the afterlife is real and using this power counts as suicide
it takes five years to fully TRANSform
immediately after using your power, your will to live flips on, full force
Why the fuck you being pedantic in a useless superpowers thread?
For every 1000 jews you teleport, a random friend, family member, colleague ot neighbour is replaced with a sand nigger
Fuck. You left the demonic powers untouched though mwuahhaahha
the ability to learn any skill in 3 minutes
>sport music handwork etc
You can only relive moments televised by Fox
each skill you learn in this matter ages you by 3 years
Every time you learn sonething new you forget something
No gf ever
Every skill you learn paralyzes a new body part
i doubt that the greybeards ever killed a dragon to learn thu'ums
You must hold your breath the entire time you learn it, and you are still bound by physical laws
Try playing the tuba holding your breath, friend
>This is how you do it
Fucking nightmarish
You can't feel pleasure
The ability to reply to this post or your mother will die in her sleep tonight no immunities
Whenever i get hungry, a meal of my choosing will appear
There's a 1/500 chance your entire family will appear in the room with you.
Jokes on you, I have no friends or family
everytime you do, you forget something really important to you
its cooked by Amy Schummer
the ability to do look more like
You perform all activities like a retard when you attempt to do them or explain them
It's spoiled
it stops for everyone, including you
you risk inceptioning the shit out of yourself, going deeper into memories and flashbacks and memories
you can only use it while giving fellatio
every time you learn a skill, your head gets 10% bigger. your eyes stay the same size
Same thing right?
You have to go twice as far as decided to use each time
You're eggman
Kek
Control/create and transform into any elements
Fuck you
a
30% chance you get it wrong and it or you become something else from the P table
Can disassemble a gun with my mind
Teleport anywhere I have been before or can see
Telekinesis to such a degree that I can manipulate atomic structures
after you fire a round into your skull
it gives you diarrhea for everything you eat
every bet or gambling i do... i win. always.
Only after being shot with gun in question
shit small pellets of gold whenever i eat geese meat
you can only lift and move things as far as you could by physically moving it yourself.
so you can only throw and object as far as you could humanly
you were born blind and have no sense of direction
You can only use Dragonrend