Homeless man keeps sleeping and shitting at the entrance to my business...

Homeless man keeps sleeping and shitting at the entrance to my business. I plan on going there in 2 hours (3AM EST) and pressing charges on him for tresspassing. Any ways I can make sure no other homeless use my store as their personal shithole?

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dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4304902/Horrific-footage-shows-homeless-man-burned-alive-street.html
youtube.com/watch?v=iwKlFkX65Zs
youtu.be/l-EM1QKYyhY
m.youtube.com/watch?v=iJFGAX77zw4
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Caltrops

Overnight security + cameras with motion sensor notifications capabilities.
Or little pointy bumps on the floor for "grip"

What kind of business do you run OP?

I used to manage in self storage at a place that had a homeless problem. You can try getting the local cops to do a drive through, give them permission to arrest anybody for trespassing.

Answer my question faggot OP.

Hang one of them outside.

>Any ways I can make sure no other homeless use my store as their personal shithole?

Set the fuckers on fire...

dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4304902/Horrific-footage-shows-homeless-man-burned-alive-street.html

It's a sneaker store.

I need legal solutions. I do have surveillence cameras that I can connect to remotely. Problem is this location is also a prime target for drunks from the bar crowd to piss in. Calling the cops may work for the homeless crashing there, but I need something more immediate for the drunks

excessively bright lights

don't do anything to piss off the homeless pop, they have nothing to lose and you can't be there 24/7

I have seen a downtown building with a bench outside one of the doors, and a "this area randomly washed overnight" sign. There were a couple of nozzles in the ceiling that would spray water on the whole bench area.

The plumbing for this isn't hard to rig up, but you need to think about it a little if you live in a place that freezes. (Basically, you have to put the valve far enough inside the building that it won't freeze, and insulate or heat the pipes between the valve and the nozzles so that all the water drains out once you close the valve.)

You could probably use one of those internet-connected light dimmer things to turn a solenoid water valve on and off from home. Put a regular manual water valve on it to, so you can shut off the water for sure when the store is open.

>Calling the cops may work for the homeless crashing there, but I need something more immediate for the drunks

What about an electric grid connected to a battery that you only turn on at certain times (say 10:00 PM through 04:00 AM)

Have the two connectors nearby but separate and then when they lay down or piss it completes they circuit and they get a non-lethal electric shock.

Takes a bit of wiring and would only work if they breached the contacts, but this sort of thing is usually caused by one or two reprobates.

After a strong shock they won't do it again.

If the police enquire you can just blame faulty wiring and say you will look into it.

Offer him a bed and eat his shit. Problem solved.

The solution to your problem lies in making the area they use as uncomfortable and inconvenient as possible. I was homeless for a year or so, and there are certain conditions that homeless people will stay away from:

>drop empty shell casings so they think they might get killed if they stay (fake blood adds to the illusion)
>put a small device somewhere that emits an annoying sound every so often (they will move to a quieter area)
>leave tempting food out that is laced with a laxative (they will put 2 and 2 together and think the food thrown out is never good)


These are just random thoughts. There's a lot more you could do. The trick is to get them to leave on their own terms, fuck with their heads.

>Offer him a bed and eat his shit. Problem solved.

What if the tramp doesn't want his shit eaten? Unlikely I will admit, but they can be very odd sometimes...

>>Calling the cops may work for the homeless crashing there, but I need something more immediate for the drunks

What about a motion activated floodlight.

If you've never noticed, men tend to prefer pissing in dark corners (so that others can't see how tiny their penis is)

Equally, if a drunk hobo is sleeping in the doorway and a 2 KW light goes on every time he turns over in his sleep, he will soon get the message and fuck off somewhere else.

>What about an electric grid connected to a battery that you only turn on at certain times (say 10:00 PM through 04:00 AM)

youtube.com/watch?v=iwKlFkX65Zs

Video very related.

>all these totally crazy fucking "solutions"
fucking sounds like you live in a 3rd world shithole OP. just saying.
You shouldn't have problems with homeless, drunks or anything.
Just call the cops to arrest the one homeless guy that regular's your doorstep and put up a grill or gate or something. call the cops daily if you have to, let them know you dont want these fuckers near your shit. they have a job to do so get them off their donut-eating asses.

you are a cuck

shoot them with air rifles from a distance or beat their ass after their 1st or 2nd warning if you care about you're business so much. Imagine what your grandfather would have done to them?

feed him?

Only response not seemingly coming from teenagers. Yeesh. The future is bleak, Sup Forums was so heavily involved in Occupy Wallstreet. Now people here are just edgy Trump supporters.

Go to google images and search for "homeless spikes"

hes an Intel for some competing business.
homeless people usually stay out of sight unless they are busking.

This sounds like the most legit solution, one not likely to get you sued.

how is feeding him a solution?

Homeless people talk, have a tight community. Bring the hammer down hard enough on one and the rest should get the message.

you don't shit where you eat.

Take a shit there first yourself to assert dominance. You gotta be alpha bro

Pay him 20 bucks to sleep in a rival businesses doorway. Pay him bit more to beat the shit out of any homeless that try's to sleep in your doorway

>this whole post

Its just a decent thing to do

Tackle him and rip his ass apart with your bare hands while screaming that you're going to hate-fuck his lungs using his own severed cock.

Problem solved.

>Pay him bit more to beat the shit out of any homeless that try's to sleep in your doorway

It's only one step from there to full on hobo boxing.

New income stream!

Do other businesses have a problem with the homeless/drunks? If they don't you should try talking with other business owners in your area and see how they dealt with the problem, if they've had one, because you are probably not the first place to have to deal with homeless/ drunks.

give him q warning. be like, bro ima call the cops get the fuck outta hear. most homeless people are looking for an easy life. if you tell em youre gona call the cops, thatbshould be enough. dont be afraid to talk to them. theyre just like us, only lazier

A baseball bat

Cheapest and easiest way is to just put a couple hidden speakers and set them up with a simple script to randomly play a very loud, short, high pitched screech or beep. It needs to be random enough that they can't anticipate when it will occur (if it's a pattern you can "get used to it" and block it out) loud enough to wake them but short enough to be unable to zero in on where it came from. If you have multiple speakers it will drive them crazy because it will be that much harder to figure where it's coming from.
Just make sure they're off during business hours.

Wicked cheap and homeless people will disappear and never come back.

Give another dirty faggott homeless 5bucks and a stale donut to rap the shit out of the other homeless

Crucify him. It'll send a message not only to other homeless, but to everyone that you are not to be messed with

The hobophobia in this thread is disgusting and problematic.

>The hobophobia in this thread is disgusting and problematic.

No hobo bro.

Totally love Willie Nelson.

Have you considered killing yourself? You sound like the kind of person who should kill yourself and rid society of everything you stand for and believe in.

dont be a faggot

if that's the guy who's sleeping at your doors maybe talk to him and give him a job.

a homeless shelter

There are decorative metal spikes you can put on the surfaces they like to sleep on. Make sure they don't have anywhere under an overhang.

Laughable as it may seem, it is the most inconspicuous and harmless way off dealing with it. The other choice is to promise him food, a job and shelter and just off him in a secluded place without traces of evidence.

But let's be real, who'd even give a shit about a missing bum?

You may be legitimately retarded.

To be honest, if your truly a business owner... be based.

Offer him a job a chance to turn his life around rather then being a parasite you can shift him into something.

I can literally smell the bitch in you. Yea, let him work there and let your business' profit slowly decrease. Homeless people are homeless because they don't have what it takes to be a productive member of society.

lol holy fuck that was funny.


OP. Do NOT feed these homeless people or try to help them out in any way. Thats not your job, your job is to run a shoe store. Plus they will just come back like stray cats. I know it sucks...and you feel shitty for not helping thme but...do not do that.
I would suggest just talking to them at first...if that doesnt work, set up flood lights... like a FUCK ton. if that does not work then i think the random high annoying sounds would work to.
Last resort would be calling the cops i my opinion. or do the things i laughed to above...sick but it could actually work. Plus Where do you live, state wise at least?

put this on your wall, make it beep, and put a sign under it saying "You are being recorded."

Fuck you I love the fuckng faggots and their dirty assholes

anything wrong with letting him use your bathroom?

If it's a homeless guy just show up. Ask him to please stop sleeping on steps. It's not that hard.

Homeless people are people with mental illness. Calling the cops on him and sending him to jail is a waste of time and pretty inhumane.

Give him some McDonald's and a pillow and ask nicely. Chances are he will leave.

youtu.be/l-EM1QKYyhY

kekkle

do the speakers and play random pirate laughs and ghost or demon screeches. record and post hobos reaction here op.

>homeless
>jail

I've been to jail once. I'd rather be in jail than be homeless. You get food and shelter and it's climate controlled.

yeah loud halloween sounds....
or shit i forgot about this method. Just play the same song...over and over and over and over and over and over again. idk some song like.. "barbie girl" by aqua

These are people who are more often than not sick. Mentally that is. Jail isn't the right place for them. And I imagine you weren't in there for long. Imprisoning people who need help is a serious problem in our society and humanity as a whole.

And I'm no hippy love everyone bitch. But it's just wrong man. Everyone feels it in the pit of their stomachs.

halloween sounds are good.

Call the bar owner/manager and tell them to deal with their drunks. For the homeless find out what charities are in the area and get them to deal with the homeless, it'll make you look better for supporting charities.

This. Use LED lights so he can't break them and hang them high. Leave them on full blast for a week and they'll disappear, the drunks pissing on your stop as well.

You don't sound like much of a businessman to me. You let this "problem" beat you. Don't look at it as a problem. Livestream that shit, watch your audience grow!

halloween sounds are good. esp to people with mental disorders because they dont know if its actually happening or inside their head. But i honestly think playing the same over and over again could drive someone insane. ....i started listening to halloween sounds just now and it makes me want to fall asleep. What would be a song that would majorly suck to be subjected to for 24 hours in a row....over and over..

Woops, hit Post before finishing.

I had this same problem for my parent's store in San Fran where the homeless population is both sane (can't afford rent) and crazy (almost professional grade homeless). The thing that worked the best is extremely bright lights saturating the area constantly. You want that area to glow light daylight. Homeless won't sleep there because it makes them painfully obvious to passing cops and pedestrians.

If your storefront cubby can manage it I would also spend a few bucks on a hose with a couple of pin prick holes in it, and mount it above the alcove. Barely turn on the water so it's just a constant drip drip drip onto the concrete. Combine that with the bright lights and it'll be a very uncomfortable place for people to hang out.

WHATS NEW PUSSY CAT? WOAHWOAHWOAH

muh dick and balls

it's a small world
m.youtube.com/watch?v=iJFGAX77zw4

Englishman that did this for an alleyway. He did it because people would pee and shit in the alley all the fucking time, so he installed some water nozzles with remote open valves, and video recorded it working.

top kek

convert your store into
Shoe, Soup, and a place to take a piss. Get some big ass dude to charge cover at the door. bam problem solved

nailed it