Ask a pizza driver anything

Ask a pizza driver anything

work is slow af

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how likely would you be willing to take payment for pizzas via sex?

would any hole do?

I'd fuck anything, I'm so desperate

Man , that pizza's sad af

Do you prefer burping or farting?

Since you drive around your town, you must know who the drug dealers are right?

I"ll have to give it a try next time i order

That pizza is as sad as my job

Why not both

I know the stoners

so would you bang?
or am i just going to get the cops called on me?

I would bang

How in the fuck are you.driving a pizza? Holy fuck!! You hold the key to revolutionizing civilization as we know it. Ending wars, stopping pollution and doing away with OPEC and other petrol based cartels....this is incredible. How much milaege do you get on a large pepperoni?

promise?

Good luck

No no, i only deal with cheese pizza

Ya know the krabby patty car?
Well that

Why not

Better than having to deliver to niggers

How many times have you delivered pizza and a fat middle aged man holding a pony and balloons and a box of candy has opened the door looking for the loli?

I'll 4cerial try this and post some sweet greentext of the results.

I half expect that i'll just get perma banned from deliveries though.

for teh lulz though amiright?

About 7 times

What kind of car do you drive? Is it your own or the company's?

I drive my own 1995 Mazda Lantis

Good luck

Nice, does it permanently smell like pizza at this point?

Do you work for Papa Johns or Papa Johns?

this makes it 8

If it does I have no idea, I can't smell pizza anymore

I work for Hell pizza

This makes it 9?

Have you sold your soul yet?

not yet, saving the sale for when this job falls through

how do you know exactly the location where you need to deliver the pizza to if you dont know the area you work at too well, do you guys have GPS or something?

I use google maps on my phone, work is too cheap to buy their drivers GPS systems

When was the last time a nigger, or a jew, or a woman, gave you a tip?

Haven't had a jew or a nigger tip me but a woman did tip me 50cents last week

how much do you make, also do you not carry a gun?

Ever fuck a customer in the pussy?

I make 200-300NZD a week and I live in a country where there isn't a risk of getting shot

>thing
Hmm

Not yet

yup, I'd stick my dick in a wood saw at this point

18th month? Amerifats sure are dumb af.

Just buy a fuck doll with a fleshlight user

Has any co-worker died in a crash?

Can't, my parents check my mail and that shit isn't sold in my town

Nope, people in my country are competent drivers

Have you ever jizzed into someone's pizza? Or spit? Or anything similar? Or has any of your coworkers done it?

I've put a ghost pepper on an asshole customers pizza hidden under all the toppings

Have you ever been at someplace, recognizing everybody's face, until you realized that there was no one there you knew?

No?

That's tame.

Well I know

ha ha! this comment is funny because she an inbred guttersnipe from G.B.

where everyone is retarded because they are inbred.

ha ha.

I know, I'm still working up to jizz cream sauce

Godspeed user

Thank you good sir

Where r u located?

New Zealand

Sorry, where r u located in NZ?

Nelson

Are you looking forward to Marchfest?

What's your favorite kind of pizza?

The one with all the meat

Nah. couldn't really care

Did you plan for your life to be this shit or did it just happen?

cheese pizza

nastiest thing you ever saw put on pizza / while delivering

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anyone asked for a pizza with extra sausage if ya catch my drift