Waifu thread

Waifu thread
Previous: The rules are very simple:
>Claim your waifu/husbando
>Discuss yours and other's choices
>Keep ERP and RP to a minimum
>Refrain from posting porn
>Most importantly: Insult Dio

Other urls found in this thread:

p.fuwafuwa.moe/qntxkr.webm
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

I awaken from a terrible nightmare around 8pm, the usual hour in which my slumber comes to a halt, albeit somewhat earlier. I obviously have a productive time ahead of me, being up at this hour. I turn myself over and kiss my Waifu pillow, landing my lips on a spot deprived of my dried-up ejaculate. As per usual, I begin to whine and scream for my mother. I require a nurtrituous meal of Tyson brand frozen chicken nuggets and Mountain Dew, and based on the smell emanating from my size 42 adult diaper, I will also need a change. I use what little energy I have to push my buzz lightyear bedsheets off, and roll myself out of bed, crushing several piss bottles in the process. Luckily, I can kill two birds with one stone by taking my biweekly shower tonight, so I can wash off the piss and also gain 10 big boy points from mommy. I waddle over to the bulletin board, and a smirk begins to form on my face as I realize I have acquired 100 big boy points, enough for a new anime body pillow. I plop 320 pound ass on to my computer chair, causing the shit in my adult diaper to spill out on the basement floor beneath me. I brush the roaches off of my LED lit mechanical keyboard and load up Sup Forums. As soon as I load up the latest "waitu claiming thread", mother walks down to the basement
Part 1
Fags

>inb4 assblasted trailer boi
dude like just filter shit, like join a better community
kek

カラミチーマス

Still here

>Insulting Dio

kill me

Claiming best girl

...

Has she left you yet, Eyebrow-kun? Or is she still reading your autistic posts?

>Creative and original shitpost

She strategically maneuvers herself through the maze of piss bottles and shit jugs until she makes it to my desk. I am her precious son, earning so many big boy points I could be on the NASDAQ. She bows before me and presents tonights meal. It isn't what I was expecting, on the tray sits a great value paper plate, adorned with Tostitos Pizza rolls and a red solo cup of Dr. Pepper. Anger swells within me, causing my face to turn red. I twist my cheeto stained neckbeard hair and ponder what her consequence will be for this disappointment. I decide to drop it, as the meal will suffice. I brush a group of roaches off of my monitor and browse the latest Waifu claiming thread, and remind her to leave her credit card so I can order another body pillow to spray my seed upon. I turn around and see her grabbing my beloved Miku pillow, I become overwhelmed with rage, I stand up from my computer chair and begin to approach her. Suddenly, I trip over 2 liter of Mountain Dew that I filled with piss last year, and my fat, unshowered body crashes into the basement floor beneath me. It seemed to happen in slow motion. I hear the "crunch" roaches crushed under my man boobs. I happened to fall in a particular spot where I keep most of my shit jugs and piss bottles. I am completely soaked in old piss and shit
Pt 2

>claiming Taiga

I gaze down upon my body. I am completely naked expect for my adult diaper, the content of which has been emptied onto my thighs and back. My stomach extends forward so much I cannot see my feet, and my man tits so far I can barely see my stomach. I see the layer of shit, piss, and dead roaches as armor, and imagine myself as a hero in one of my favorite animes. I am trying to save my princess, my Miku body pillow mother is trying to capture. I must save her, she is my only instrument to combat my eternal virginity. I charge at mother, and collide with her, sending her crumbling down onto my mattress. She vomits immediately, because she knows she's lying upon millions of her unborn grand children, in the form of my semen absorbed into my buzz lightyear bedsheets. I lay on top of her, burying her face between my shit-covered man breasts. I pull myself away, and laugh as notice some of the dead roaches have stuck to the shit on her face. I reclaim my previous body pillow and kiss her up and down. I then proceed to expose my tiny Phallus and masturbate onto her, as a display of my power should her or my mother rebel against me once more
Pt 3, I'm writing these as I go

Now now. Where are your manners?

No.

Mother retreats upstairs. I squint my eyes and hiss at the sliver of light creeping in from the basement door. I haven't been to the other parts of the house since last Christmas, when mom told me I had to socialize with the family or get my computer taken away. I imagine my house as a video game map, and think the rest of my house as The Unknown Lands. I also like to imagine my room a castle. I haven't been outside since I was 16, which was about 6 years ago. I live in complete darkness, except for my computer screen, which is always displaying the current Waifu claiming thread. Thinking of last Christmas makes me sweat and feel anxious, I never want to leave my castle. I remember walking up the steps. And trying to adjust my eyes to light. Mother made me wear a red Christmas sweater and some sweat pants. I walked into the living room where my normie family members were talking and doing things on their iPhones. I tried to convince them that computers are superior technology and only normies use phones, but they wouldn't listen. My little cousin asked my why I had so many stains on my sweat pants, and I realized these were the ones I masturbated on before mommy bough my first body pillow. I waddled back down to my castle and haven't left since.
Pt 4

please miss zuru

why not

I despise my family of normies, in fact I hate everyone who isn't part of the Waifu community. The only person free of my hatred is my mother. She's taken care of me for the past 22 years, and supplies me with food and diaper changes. It is now 10 pm, and I'm still soaked in my own shit and piss. Whatever, I've smelled worse than this before. I sit down at me desk, brush some roaches away from my mousepad, and refresh the current Waifu thread. Just as i begin to select my image of Miku to claim, I feel something move between my ankles. I see a big rat crawling beneath me. This will make an exquisite gift for my Waifu body pillow. I grab him by the tail, and suffocate him between my man breasts. I then throw him on to my bed, to appease Miku. I can hear mother yelling upstairs, in between sobs and crying. Probably on her normie iPhone talking to one of her newfag friends about me. All of this excitement makes my bowels loose, so I grab the nearest empty 2 liter of soda, remove my size 42 adult diaper, and like my asshole up with the opening. I squeeze out enough pizza roll liquid shit to fill up 1/4 of the container. I place it next to a pile of dead roaches and look back at my computer screen
Pt 5

Rea are you around?

If you kill me first

Consider this: your grandparents and their generation were overseas killing and bombing Japanese people, and now you sit in a dark bedroom masturbating your deformed penis to their cringeworthy cartoons. If they're still alive, I'm sure they do their best to NOT think of the shit stain they've left behind in this world.

What about me

Closer. Now make it more proper in grammar and titles.

I already told you, people here aren't always happy, and I want to help lighten the load. I ask psople how their days are, if they need to vent or unload, I'm here to listen. sometimes people just need to not be alone.
I just want people to be okay.

my penis isn't deformed

Because you're already dying. Just keep living and at some point it'll happen 100% sure.

No. Read above.

Out on a Friday night with friends posting in a waifu thread .... Some how that's worse then being home doing this.

Did Daddys gifts run out? Did his job get given to someone else? Whats made you this angery? I want to know.

...

no
how
you could help it happen faster

You got a point
>Vigne and Raphi handholding
Lewd

Hey guys. This is Mr. Cothran. I work as a special Ed teacher at my local high school. I've been teaching autistic kids for the last 13 years or so, when I discovered this website. Most of my students were avid fans of anime. After I caught a few of them masturbating to anime characters in the back of the classroom, I had to come up with a plan to keep them calm. I started creating these threads, and sitting them in front of the classroom computers. Soon enough, all of my autistic students became completely obsessed with these threads, and I've had to make them one after another for all these years. I would appreciate if everyone who is not my student wouldn't post here because it has been causing uproar in my classroom with the autistic kids shouting and screaming that their waifus were stolen, some have gone back to masturbating in the corner once again. Please save my classroom from being turned into a zoo again.

Yes I'm watching 20/20

...

Put us away, have fun. Do it, faggot.
We'll be here when you're back to being introverted.
>RAAAWWR

bull is not pleased with gf

Hey guys. This is Mr. Cothran. I work as a special Ed teacher at my local high school. I've been teaching autistic kids for the last 13 years or so, when I discovered this website. Most of my students were avid fans of anime. After I caught a few of them masturbating to anime characters in the back of the classroom, I had to come up with a plan to keep them calm. I started creating these threads, and sitting them in front of the classroom computers. Soon enough, all of my autistic students became completely obsessed with these threads, and I've had to make them one after another for all these years. I would appreciate if everyone who is not my student wouldn't post here because it has been causing uproar in my classroom with the autistic kids shouting and screaming that their waifus were stolen, some have gone back to masturbating in the corner once again. Please save my classroom from being turned into a zoo again.

PLEASE CAN WE WORK SOMETHING OUT

Yours is probably the only one that is

Chara's isn't as bad as yours and he wants to be a girl

There's some pretty lewds scenes with them.

I don't want it to happen faster.

Wow that show has 39 seasons

"Please kill me, Shizuru."
I know i don't scold love-chan for calling me miss, but that doesn't mean everybody gets to.

I'll try. Maybe tomorrow night
Appreciate the motivation

Hey guys. This is Mr. Cothran. I work as a special Ed teacher at my local high school. I've been teaching autistic kids for the last 13 years or so, when I discovered this website. Most of my students were avid fans of anime. After I caught a few of them masturbating to anime characters in the back of the classroom, I had to come up with a plan to keep them calm. I started creating these threads, and sitting them in front of the classroom computers. Soon enough, all of my autistic students became completely obsessed with these threads, and I've had to make them one after another for all these years. I would appreciate if everyone who is not my student wouldn't post here because it has been causing uproar in my classroom with the autistic kids shouting and screaming that their waifus were stolen, some have gone back to masturbating in the corner once again. Please save my classroom from being turned into a zoo again.

Would anyone be nice enough to negotiate something with me?

Highly Potential coppy pasta

i think it's really boring but my sister wanted to me watch

There's always a link to anime and autism user

Tbh I need to make myself a folder for Vigne. Reaction image goldmine and she's really qt

But you can't be out on Friday night with friends tomorrow! Then it's Saturday! Go have fun!

dude weed lmao

Maybe he should give her the fucc? Or does she not gibe succ or da pucci?

Hey guys. This is Mr. Cothran. I work as a special Ed teacher at my local high school. I've been teaching autistic kids for the last 13 years or so, when I discovered this website. Most of my students were avid fans of anime. After I caught a few of them masturbating to anime characters in the back of the classroom, I had to come up with a plan to keep them calm. I started creating these threads, and sitting them in front of the classroom computers. Soon enough, all of my autistic students became completely obsessed with these threads, and I've had to make them one after another for all these years. I would appreciate if everyone who is not my student wouldn't post here because it has been causing uproar in my classroom with the autistic kids shouting and screaming that their waifus were stolen, some have gone back to masturbating in the corner once again. Please save my classroom from being turned into a zoo again.

Please

Please kill me, Shizuru.

But it was written for the purpose of being pasta.

Her voice is cute.
p.fuwafuwa.moe/qntxkr.webm

dude hashish lmao

Yeah it seemed like you were more interested in things that are fictional with some action maybe.

Why not

>Ps: rawr

>this post
No wonder you're a sticky virgin discussing animated preteens with other pillow-lovers kek

dude devils lettuce lmao

>not mad
>not autism

fuck you sachi

Claim

...

>It's raining
How's it going?

holes too busted

I was having a conversation. Wait your turn.

Very good.
I'll have to decline though. I don't have the means nor the will to go do something like that.
I don't dislike you. You just make me sad.

It goes. Bit tired and hungry. May drink some more soon.

I'm sorry for bad grammar I'm a little sleep deprived. And I think 20/20 is pretty fake anyway so it's somewhat enjoyable. I feel a lot of sadness surrounding the core of your soul... What's wrong with you?

>people with zero sexual experience discussing other people's sex lives
Hahahahahahahahahahahah

why do i make you sad?

Maybe all those homeless in New York broke her? So she goes back every week to give them what he cant / wont?

See

I still have yet to install my HDD.

Do you even procrastinate, bro?

It's fine. Maybe you should rest soon. Don't want to get into that stuff right now.

nah, that nigger he's friends with does that

Hello Rea

You used to be an enjoyable friend to have around, and i feel one should mourn the loss of something that was important to them.

No one is always happy. Not even you. From what I've seen you've never really told about yourself much. This is probably the first time and to me it looks like self satisfaction, but there really isn't anything wrong with that. Making others happy makes you happy. It's fine. At least I want to believe that.

Again. Conversation. You rude spic.

It's a really nice voice for sure

Someone offered me beer because a party's on right now.

I remembered why I don't drink.

I would be if I really had anything to be doing

Aside from all the things I could be doing right now

>It goes, it goes, it goes, it goes Guillotine!
Jack again? I got the last of my vodka in my cup, and beer is all gone, sadly.
Still a few bottles of unhealthy goodness in fridge and on shelf thought....

>"I frequently pretend to either be in a relationship with, or pretend to actually be a Japanese cartoon little girl with other grown men on an obsolete website that makes me feel like I'm a part of something"
>the human races' face when

Maybe the nigger friend went full hoodrat after all. Has all his new boys pass her around like a sack of goon.

Why don't you drink then?

Its making me so sad, I want to kill myself, I want to take everyone with me down to Hell and watch them suffer. That's only a fraction of what you're feeling and I feel very sorry for you.

Sup nigger.

she was broken since a kid
step-daddy issues he raped her everyday until her body only lusted for bbc and my daddy's can only buy me bull's clothing not his dick

so i'm dead now?

>DidYouEvenInstallHDDYet
Go install the HDD, no excuses,

Sometimes I'm suffering
And other times I'm suffering a little more than usual

I'm really sorry if I missed anyone's messages! I got caught up reading a manga!

I'm going to bed now, so I thought I'd say goodnight before I go. Take care everyone!

No. I said lost, not dead.

Roll dubs and I'll consider it

I'm a nigger now? :(

Sounds about right.

so i'm lost?

Dubs, what are those?