*blocks your path*

*blocks your path*

"Are my eyes the same height?"

...

"I am taking control."

...

Why would I go to Sweden?

He clearly needs two of something.

...

>hello jamal. yes, you do have nice eyes. how can i help you?

"I shall take over the task of operating this vessel"

GOT EM

>slap his elbow really hard
>he pokes himself in the eyes
NYUCK NYUCK NYUCK

Why were they even scared of him?

If you slapped him hard enough, his calcium deprived starvation bones would snap like twigs.

I shot plenty of skinnys like this fag while protecting my country and the merchant navy. They are cowards, one and all.

Maybe it was all of the AK-47s. Their calcium-deprived thumbs could still pull a trigger.

mussampa

You shot them...

...with your cameraphone while masturbating.

Of course you did, son.

If I held my hand above an object, had you hold your hand halfway between my hand and the object, and told you to try and grab the object as soon as you saw my hand move? I'd grab that shit before you.

Try it on a friend sometime.

I know a guy who was actually on the boat that got hijacked. He said that he actually was at a position to where he could have kicked the guys ass *this guy was like 250 of solid muscle, now he is 250 of solid fat* He said that it pissed him off cause the local news did a report on him and everyone in the comments were calling him a coward and he was like "WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO< KNOCK ONE OUT AND HAVE A BOAT FULL OF ANGRY TRIGGER HAPPY SOMALIS WITH AKS AND MACHETES! JESUS EVERYONE THINKS THEY CAN PLAY HERO. He haated the captain, he said it was his fault they got trapped in the first place and he wasn't much of a hero, just following normal protocol in a situation like this

usain got skinny

Don't ships have barrels?

Roll a fucking barrel at them. Medal of Freedom, guaranteed.

*Deus vult*

Suuuuuure you do.

I bet you also invented the question mark. And know where Jimmy Hoffa is. And knew Deepthroat (as opposed to just performing it daily on Somalians at the bus station).

...

snap his arms.

...

Why would i make something that stupid up? I understand if i said I was on a boat but knowing someone who was on the boat who is a regular customer at my job. Not too farfetched. I think you are projecting your somali deepthroat fantasies on me

...