I have a question for all the married fags out there :

I have a question for all the married fags out there :

I love my girlfriend a lot. More than I ever loved all the ones I had befor her combined. I think I'll propose to her soon, eventhough it has only been a year since we first met. I'm 22.

She is the type of girl that needs to hear this love thing face to face but I have troubles speaking about feelings in general. So that might be something to work on in the future.

My question is : should I do it? What do you people say ?Is marriage worth it.

Have you lived with her before?

Yes, we are living together for half a year so far. It's like living with your best friend.

Plus her family is very nice.

Fuck off you lucky piece of shit

Fuck off with your marriage you dipshit, you're 20 fucking 2.

no wait 5 years. Seriously. I love my wife but I wish I had waited until 28 or so to get married. We're both really different people than we where in our early 20s. There is no rush.

I'd say wait till you're both settled down, living in a place you wanna stay with a job you wanna keep. That way you both know it's what you want. Also, fuck you.

OP, I will be honest with you. I got married at 20 after dating for two years and living together for a year and a half. We have been married for five years now and the marriage itself is a good thing. But please listen to this Internet stranger when I tell you to be absolutely sure before you have kids. It changes a women and most of the time it's not in a good way. I love my kid but that first year with kids was hell.

22 is kinda young, but some people pull it off. I got married when i was 30.
People still change a lot at 22, so you might just want to continue dating. With the right person, there's not much difference between dating and marriage, anyway. But if you find that you or she changes too much, you have an easier out when you're just dating.

FUCKIN RUUUUNNNNN!!!!!!!

also very true. If you're not in agreement about kids, RUN. seriously.

Thanks. That's some good advice. The thing is that I don't normally tend to rush such important decisions like this. But somehow, and I really can't explain it, I just feel like it is not going to get better. I don't know if i should listen to reason or my heart...

Thats what I worry about. And the reason I'm asking for advice.

How old is she?
And how do you think she feels about marriage at this point?

Married at 19, 3 kids by 23.


Just wait. Live together for a few years, why rush into marriage? If you're committed to eachother, you don't need a ring to prove it.
Enjoy life and eachother, don't rush things. Believe it or not, you're still young.

she is 21. I honestly don't know. She is a very reasonable and down to earth girl, but somethimes she gets really emotional. I was thinking about proposing to her in september, so I could get to know her thoughts on this subject.
There is a lot of long-term-planning-talk between us. Like shared bank accounts (hell no) , family planning (we both agree that we first have to finish college/university before this is even something to think about) and other stuff like that.

Right now you are dating her agent not the real her. The REAL her will emerge a couple months after you sign that marriage contract with her and the state surrendering your life and property to both of them. There's a reason they have you sign that contract.

Once you meet the REAL her it will already be too late. Women change after they get you locked in to kids and marriage. They let themselves go physically and become an emotional wreck mentally. If you have problems dealing with that and want out ... well then the lawyers step in and start taking your money and happiness. So saddle up bud... It's going to be a long road for you.

What's the point in living if you don't believe in love? Get married, If it doesn't work, the. It doesn't and you'll be single again and you can Buy some whiskey and an axe and canvas tarp and grow a beard and figure some shit out in the woods for a few then come back a new man ready for love. Do it.

She sounds like a nice girl honestly. Any woman who can be called reasonable is worth marrying cause you ain't gonna find many of them. Sorry if I sound sexist, but that's been my experience. 22 is still young. I'd probably wait till you both graduate, but I bet it could work out. Good luck!

You are right. I'll take this into consideration.

Seems cynical but you may be right. I'll have to find out somehow.

I don't know if you want me to make a mistake or honestly think I should go for it.

Anyway. This is why I like Sup Forums . YOu can get a lot of different oppinions from different people. And thats worth a lot. Not everybody has relatives or friends they can count on for support or help with matters of the heart. Thanks everybody. You helped me a lot. All the best to you.

You also have to keep in mind how kids will affect your relationship.

Sex life will die because they will always be crying then when they stop crying they will be in your bed in and out of your room constantly. This kills her sex drive and will make it impossible for you to get any. That leads to some resentment.

Did you like sleep? Gone. Did you like watching adult movies and going out? Yeah totally gone. Did you like eating at nice restaurants? LOL welcome to chucky fuckin cheese my dude. Did you like nice vacations to interesting locations? Nope forget it you need kid friendly locations now.

All of that really takes a toll on a couple. It transforms you into parental slaves rather than the couple you once were. It's a big factor in all the divorces I'm sure you've heard of in the US. You might think it's cynical but the numbers are the numbers man. A lot of times it gets wrecked. Just saying be aware of the pitfalls.

Yes.
Totally worth it.
Not always easy; it takes a lot of hard work.
But completely worth it.

year
It'll work out if you're both simple minded with limited ambition

I was with my wife for 4 years before I asked her to marry me, and we were living together for almost all of that time frame. I would say listen to reason, and wait for a little while longer. You Will face some rough spots, as every couple does, in the future, and how it all works out then will be a good indicator of whether or not the marriage will last.

Been married for 15 years. Started dating my wife in 1999. You say you live together? Good. Seen a fair amount of people not realize you gotta do a "test drive" on living arrangements. She has habits you won't like and same goes for her. Get that out of the way. But here's some other stuff:

Can she cook? Not 5 course meals but at least not burn cookies.
Have you ever ate anything she has cooked? Seen many a bro go down when their old lady cooked them a meal and they took a bite.
You got hobbies? Are they mutual between you two?I hate golf but go every Saturday just to get away. The other 6 days we watch TV, vidya game, things like that.
She immature about petty shit? or controlling?

I will say this: marriage is awesome. No more chasing for the elusive Pussycabra. Its at home and usually available 24/7. You have help with bills, you have somebody willing to listen to your problems, you have a friend. But know this: NO FUCKING KIDS. Best damn decision I ever made. They will drag you the fuck down. They will break you (mentally, physically, financially). Having no kids means we can take off at a moments notice for a camping trip. Or to go to yard sales. Or shopping. Or a weekend trip to the beach. NO KIDS!

Don't be a dumb ass. This is from a married guy. Women always change. Always. In ten years, you will still be you, and you will not have a clue who you are living with after year two. Year four and five, completely different from year two. Same thing. Every other year you will be living with a completely different person. If tou are very lucky, some of those different people she turns into will have some of the traits that made you like her to begin with. Not fucking likely though.

Do it, and don't look back. Married people will often bitch about marriage, and I want to fucking slap them. Most of them anyway. Sometime a person does end up with a complete piece of shit that was never worth their time. My best friend's first wife for example. She was an evil, psycho bitch who did everything she could to hurt him. His current wife on the other hand is an angel, and they are made for each other. You can tell just how much in love they still are just being around them.

I never married. I was engaged, and she was the one. The only one I ever loved like that, or ever will. But I lost her. I lost her twice actually. The first time devastated me. The second...It's pretty much killed me and made me give up on life. It wasn't just losing her, but also watching my mom wither away and die of cancer shortly after. If there was a time in my life that I needed someone by my side and help me through my problems, it was then, but I had to do it alone. That's when and where my life completely fell apart, and I fell into drugs and heavy drinking. I didn't care anymore, and never will.

Had I married her I think I could have been happy. I was already happy just having her in my life at all, and that's the only time of my life where I felt it. I still miss her. I still love her, but she's gone from my life forever, and that's that. All I am doing now is waiting around to die.

Staying single sucks. It may not while you are still young, but at some point your friends all settle down, and you don't fit in with the younger party crowd, so you become socially withdrawn, and spend all your time alone, wishing you had of settled down and started a family too.