Sup Forumsros, Can we start a feels thread now ? Family issues, emptiness, weirdness and all that shit

Sup Forumsros, Can we start a feels thread now ? Family issues, emptiness, weirdness and all that shit.

Other urls found in this thread:

google.ca/amp/s/www.lionsroar.com/so-who-are-you/amp/
vocaroo.com/i/s1SqA9V5vL39
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

Today I spilled my soda at McDonald's and the staff got pissed off at me.

I had an interesting thought the other day. when a co-worker was talking about Titanfall 2, and I thought about what I did in my free time,( YT , or here) and I struggled to come up with anything interesting to say about those things. I think i just mindlessly do things w/o actually caring about them

It's interesting indeed. Do you really feel the envy, the urge to do the things you do tho ?

yeah, it's a habit, everyday I, go to TY watch almost the same videos or the same channels, sometimes, I stare at my subfeed not at all interested by anything there.

i loathe everyone around me, even my closest friends. even my self. but you would not see it, as i am the nice guy.

Have you tried other activities ? Maybe still internet related.
how do you feel when you change your habits ? Just uncomfy or you wanna run back in your comfort-zone ?

No, not really, I found a new song via Sup Forums but other than that no not particularly

Try it, faggot.

You guys will get over it. Eventually.

...

legit man, the feeling of emptiness has got to me. girl i like ignores me, schools going to shit- i live in australia and atm theres a fear of comming home one day to my dog dead becoz snakes like to hybernate around my house and come out on days where it gets warmer. fml Sup Forumsros

bump

I fear I'll be alone for the rest of my life. no one would find me attractive. but I don't know what I want to do if w/ my life to "focus on myself"

I spent my whole life pretending to be normal only to fuck it up every now and then and start getting depressed about it. I'm fake and I don't care about other people but I want them to care about me but even if they did I couldn't feel it.

15549

I just got diagnosed with (luckily early stage one) liver cancer. Still not good. And I have shit government healthcare (American) that won't actually cover most of the tests/procedures/medications I'll need. So even if I go into remission and beat the disease, I'll be in horrible credit-destroying debt. And I haven't found the courage or the right way to break the news to my girlfriend or family yet.

Does this count?

i collect wojak images
>feels bad man
>feels good man
>feels
here's one that I saved from the ad

Understanding I was not "normal" was the biggest step of my life.

Sure it counts. hope you wont RIP in peace too soon bro.

Ayyy feel better now

...

I collect Todds they are all on my phone rn

Last night I ate a spicy burrito. I am lactose intolerant. Feels like lava

I hope he an hero soon.

I fapped 6 times in 4 hours while hugging the pillow and watching a hentai video.
I stayed in bed all day.
I don't feel bad.

Can't get a job because of my background
Have herpes
Can't move on from "the one"
Care too much about the people I hate to an hero
Constantly fixated every morning and night of a desire to kill everyone and myself.

Practised my passions and talents for a decade and have fuck all to show for it other than broken hands and fucked back.

Super poor fag, living with parents.


Any advice ITT?
>inb4 just do it faggot

I just realized that I'm addicted to bad thoughts and feelings.
I can't stop thinking about how my life is shit, and even when I try to clear my mind, I still come back to those thought.

It's almost as if I unconsciously like to suffer and to wallow in my self-defeating thoughts.
I managed to escape from my daily hell a couple of times, and started fixing my life, but it was always a short time, a few months at best, before I came back to hell. I don't know what to do anymore, this is not a way to live.

Stop faking. Be yourself, let people hate you for it, and let the real people that support you show themselves. I stopped giving a fuck what others thought of me at age 10, and since then I may have lost some people in my life, but I've not had to deal with bullshit from the people I care about, because they know me, and I know them. Being myself, in all it's grotesque and weird ways, is the best thing I've ever done for myself.
>15 years into the experiment
>respected by the people I care about
>still give no shits what others want from me.

That's called depression user.
I know them feels, it's an easy thing to feed.

Change things up and seek help friend! You can do this

Heh, thanks user. I'm hoping I don't die too. But the life-ruining debt might be worse.

Shrink told me I'm not actually depressed, just low mood (however you say it in english).
That said, he couldn't help me, as usual. No one can.

Trips talked space cowboy. You'll live

I'm goddamn useless, I see all these people that I went to HS with and they won the genetic jackpot. I'm here just struggling to keep a shitty fast-food job

The most interesting thing I am doing is planning for a campaign for my Fallout PnP, but I come to that only occasionally

Sounds like he found his degree in a cereal box dude.

Make an effort to fix it.
Or don't.

It's your life :)

I could give a fuck

That's because you went to a shrink and not a psychiatrist. If you did, seek help in other places.
I've had problems with expressing my shitty thoughts, which has lead me to losing any care I was receiving and stuff like that. I'm back at manning up and actually explaining that I have plans to end my life, and the shit I think about. Also, I fucked up my life beyond repair (studies - goodbye) so I was forced into a shitty corner. Now I've finally got myself into a job, a drastic change in my life that was hard to make without the pressure of hitting rock bottom. You'll get it working user, but there's probably some major changes you'll have to make, even if they seem impossible at the moment.

Bump 4 curious

Hey a kindread spirit.
Share said tale of woe with us?

Apply for 9837492834729847 jobs.
With a bit of luck you'll find something you like, if you don't, continue searching.
Other than that:
>get a hobby that you feel no pressure to succeed for anyone else in
>buy a dog
>eat good food
>plan your sundays, sundays always fuck working people up because they spend it dreading monday

>make an effort
What do you mean? I made huge efforts, I even got results (I lost a lot of weight for example), but in the end it's all useless. Nothing matters and I always lose all the energy.
Even when I succeed I still feel like shit, so now I know that there's no point.
I went to several pshycologists and pshychiatrists. I will never take antidepressants again. They were worse than the illness. All doctors were useless, a complete waste of time and money.

It's bit of a story, keep the thread alive while I greentext.

some anti-depressants work for some people, some don't. Almost everyone have ones that work for them, but anti-depressants can't substitute actual care. Try some of this
Also, physical exercise does wonders for some. I used to be really active, which meant it hardly did anything for me anyways.

Hey thanks user.

I have a casual job that I hate. I'm trying to find more work. But google lists some nasty shit next to my name as a first result..

I'm working in music.. which means I get paid fuck all. It's my passion outlet and hobby.

I'm just drawing blanks as to how to get my shit back on the right track.
I know the words and steps but it just feels never ending.

I'm not meaning to look a gift horse in the mouth, or be ungrateful.
Thanks user.

Retarded monkeys infest my planet

Bump

Ok to be blunt.
If this shit is affecting your life or others in a negative way. It's a depressive symptom.
That and any time you've ever had a restless night or an anxious moment qualifies as depression.

It seems like you want a magic answer.

This is a long road full of hard work though user.
I'm sorry, but keep working at it.

Even if ifs all for nothing.
You making an effort and failing is better than not doing everything you can. Because it's not about rewards, but how you live honestly with your lot in life. That's all that can affect you..

Just started Citalopram, how fucked am I ?

>keep working at it.
No more energy to do anything, it's over.
>restless night
I basically never had a good night of sleep in my life. Not anxious, tho.

I'm not looking for magic answers, just answers. The doctors were supposed to help, but they didn't. I did alone what I could, but it's not enough.

My story begins at the age of 4
>parents split up, and are constantly fighting
>it never got physical between them, but the situation was complete cancer
>they couldn't hear eachothers names without verbal diarrhea about how horrible the other is ensues
>me and older sister become messengers between our now separate parents
>turned to lying and catering to them both because we couldn't take the situation
>mental abuse by stepmother
>this is when depression started, but was ignored and still remained somewhat functional

>fast forward 5-ish years
>weirdo of the school
>i'm fine with this
>bullied because of it
>not fine with this
>attempt suicide through hanging
>rope to short and knot to shitty
>continue living

>fast forward another 5-ish years
>bullied again
>lives with depressed mother who still acts like a fucking baby about her relationship to my dad
>"at least I'm not stupid like the rest of these people" being my only reason to even try
>find a girl
>quirky as fuck
>not my type
>still we work
>get into relationship for 2-3 years
>find out she's been cheating on me
>break it off because I can't take it
>she tries winning me back
>ends up sexually abusing me in the process
>sleep issues start to come into play
>never been this low before, life is shit
>find out this girl is spreading the rumour that I raped her
>the small patch of people I care about don't even ask for my view in the matter
>people just buy that I'm the rapist
>sleep deprivation starts fucking me up
>hallucinations, memory problems
>apply for care
>shoved around through the system, not getting any help

Fast forward another 2 years
>find another girl
>she understands me
>she doesn't need me to explain, but she listens understands when needed
>also a person that doesn't open up to many
>relationship is absolute bliss
>still depressed and sleep deprived, but she makes it bearable
>basically gets through the instance of school before university by the skin on my teeth
cont ...

This is my point.

You need to be actively trying to reprogram your mental habits.

Accept the truth.
You will only accept the love you think you deserve.

If you're on Sup Forums you aren't making a real effort to change for the better.

Read about some interesting passions.
Start more hobbies than you can deal with.
Be better tomorrow than you were today.
Just because you can.

Be so busy that everything's a distraction.
It's not a real life but it's better than sitting around fueling how bad you feel.

Bump

I'm 18 years old and drinking myself to death because I'm too weak to stop or seek professional help, and all I want is someone I can be myself with and talk about how I feel

Tell me how you feel?
What are you running from?

I get what you say, but I don't have the mental /and therefore physical) strength.
>Be so busy that everything's a distraction.
That's how I always "lived", but that's no way to live, and I'm literally too tired anyway.
It's a vicious circle and I don't know how to break it. But I know for sure that pulling myself by my own bootstraps won't work.

>2 years in and she suddenly loses interest
>I don't understand why
>She can't explain why
>I'm left hanging
>move out of town to go to university, and get away from the rape accusation
>can't get through that shit what so ever
>decide to try to get help again, now in a different town
>after many months of attempts and phone calls I get some anti-depressants, sedatives and get put on a waiting list for regular counseling by a psychiatrist
>atleastsomeonelistens.png
>life is still shit, still not functioning what so ever
>at least I sleep and don't hallucinate anymore because of it
>try to push through the rut, and finishing my studies
>it goes to complete shit and I lose my right to student loans
>use up savings to pay for rent and food
>broke, depressed and dangerous to myself
>half assed attempt at suicide
>apply for jobs
>attempt suicide
>apply for more jobs
>finally get internship in the field I've been studying
>should get a full employment by June
>still need care, still need meds, still broke as fuck
>but at least I'm not studying, at least I'm not in the hellhole of a town I used to live in
>finally starting to get over last girl
>still suicidal thoughts
>still broke
>just barely functioning

It's a shitty story, and I'm a whiny little shit, I know.

Moving out of town was 4 years ago, got care shortly after. The rest of the story is stretched over this period.

I'm one of the Columbine survivors. The anniversary is this month and I'm just so fucking bummed. Everybody at my work and stuff is like "come on man it's been a long time get over it" and I just cannot. I want to die. I wish I had been killed in the shooting.

Screencapped and saved into my "baw" folder
Atleast the story will kinda live on now

The problem is that you *can't* get out of it without being busy. Don't do it to distract yourself, do it to actually activate your brain and train your system to deal with stress. This is extremely hard, I know, but try finding something you can do without it feeling like a chore. It doesn't have to be productive, it really shouldn't be something anyone else wants you to do. You need to want to do it, and that is paradoxical in a state of depression. But you know what you WOULD like to do, I'm sure, and do it, even if it sucks to begin with.

I personally took up skateboarding again to do this. It shuts off my brain and lets me just do what ever I do. I don't think about *having* to do it for anyone else, I don't need to perform, I just need to do it to feel somewhat alright.
Of course, it won't change your life completely, but it will be a stepping stone to get yourself into dealing with your shit.

I go out of my way to find out why people dislike me just so I can be angry about it and nurse my own insecurities.

ik the feel brutha
music is my life and blood but im living paycheck to paycheck
cant promise any success, but if its any comfort i lose myself in work everyday to forget about life
its the only hope i have left anyway

It's like there's no life to us, it's all habit.

20mg?

Makes me feel really weird.

Wanking was great in te begining though

For real?
Why?

Did you know any of the people killed?
I get the thing of not getting over traumatic events, but focusing on something else sounds like a good idea. Or at least get some counseling to get it out of your system. You have the right to feel like shit, but that doesn't mean you need to put yourself in a situation where it's impossible to handle. Would you say you're suffering from PTSD or is it more related to loss?

Kek

Thanks for sharing here.
Keep your chin up til June.
Work hard bro I'm trying to do the same as you.
I'm glad I heard your story.

It's a shame that things haven't been going well so far. But it's a good outlook you have I hope you can keep it up.
Thanks for sharing.

Have a job and it makes me feel ok. Not the greatest but people have it worse.

Have herpes.

Will probably have more complications with my liver soon.

Have an old as fuck car but at least I have one I guess.

Losing weight and people are starting to pay a little more attention to me which is nice.


I don't really want to complain because I know people have it worse. I guess that's a feel. A different one but still.

I already play the guitar, it's my favorite hobby. But when I feel particularly shitty I can't even play, my fingers are stuck. I can't concentrate for shit, I can't even follow the story of a movie or a tv show. Fuck

I'm married with no friends, family doesn't really get along..wife has friends but I dont....would kill myself but I don't want to put my wife through the pain of my death

I smoke 5 or 6 joints a day and don't get high

google.ca/amp/s/www.lionsroar.com/so-who-are-you/amp/

Anyone who's interested in getting out of their head, at least try to, give this a quick read. Might help.

Why do you get angry at people for disliking you? You can't be liked by everyone, and that's fine. No one is.
To me, seeing people dislike me is a motivator. The people who dislike me for some preconceived notion are fine examples of why I have no interest in those people. If someone dislikes me for something I actually stand for, it's often a case of judging me by a single factor they don't happen to agree with. Is that someone I'd care to be friends with?
>lol no
If there's a misunderstanding, I just live my life, if I happen to prove them wrong, that's good, but if I don't, they're the ones to blame for not getting to know me.

If I'm disliked for who I truly am, well, tough luck, I'm me and I can't be anyone else, even though it's a good time to take an introspective look and assess whether I am treating others the way I'd like to be treated. I can't say I treat people bad, and you shouldn't either, if I do I try to correct it.
There will always be people that hate you, for one or several reasons. Own it, it's okay.

Likewise here. Good to know we're not alone.
Tell me about your work?

I've had plenty of jobs but after about a decade as a musician, roadie/ "mixing engineer" with two degrees.
All I know is music now.
Kek should've done a real trade instead

People normally dont get it because music seems like a good career to most people. Because "it's doing what you love right?" Fuck it's hard sometimes.

Thanks for letting me bitch

Sorry but I can't take advice from someone who hangs around feels threads. Your motivations are a lie if you're still here.

i need money, aint that weird?

I guess just because I never got over it. I still have dreams about it, I hate hearing gunshots and screaming on TV. Right after it happened, I started obsessively collecting information about it, news paper clippings and stuff, my whole life became defined by the shooting because I was so young at the time. I was just a teenager. I just feel like a broken, stunted human and I think it would have been better if I hadn't survived. These feelings always intensify around the anniversary though.

Only through friends or chatting with them in school, I didn't really personally know any of the victims. I do know a few of the people who were injured, however. It's awful, but this is the reason I don't feel an intense loss like those who did know the victims personally.

Well, after the incident we all were sort of made to see therapists or psychologists or whatever. At that time I think that was my diagnosis, that I was suffering from PTSD. She said it would get better, that I would stop seeing Harris's face everywhere, but it never stopped. I still see him everywhere. I saw his face during the shooting. It's so hard to get over, to relate to people now. I wish I could just drop it and forget, I really do.

I know exactly that feeling. I'm a guitarist myself, but I can't play at all when I feel bad. It's probably because it's so driven by accomplishments and artistic visions. Try something you won't judge yourself when you're doing. Building things is often a good hobby for this. Especially if you build shitty things.

You guys must not have real talent. I write my best music when depressed.

>anyone who posts in feels threads is untrustworthy and incapable of giving decent advice
You know, you're in a feels thread. You contradict yourself by implying you're the exception, and is therefor capable of assessing whether or not advice is good or not. Either that, or you're just retarded.

been living with my gf for about 3 years now. i've fucked up a lot and things are way different between us (lied to her and was just shitty in general) not even sure if i love her anymore and just want to be alone but if we break up she will be homeless and jobless due to medical conditions. i'm trying to save up money so i can move out (moving in with a friend just need a car and to pay utilities) but i'm constantly having to spend money on groceries for my family because my parents spend all the money on alcohol and my little sister. get told i don't do enough around the house because i don't immediately clean up after myself and everyone else in the house. i work 6 days a week and even struggle with that because of a concussion i got about a year ago. i'm at least 30 lbs underweight but can't gain weight cause depression. i spend a shit ton of money on weed because it helps me eat and sleep. i want to stop smoking but every time i try i have mental breakdowns because it was my only relief from this constant stress. i just feel like i'm stuck in an endless loop with no way out unless i treat everyone around me like complete garbage and hate myself even more for it

My only advice is to try and push on with life, try to get a hobby where you're disconnecting yourself from your thoughts, at least for a while.
Also, cannabis can be a nice relief for some people. Under the right conditions, hallucinogens can also reverse this, but I must stress the "right conditions" part.

When did I ever imply I was the exception? Even your reading comprehension is bad man.

forgot to add that i can't really talk things out with my gf cause i have assburgers and can never explain myself properly and it just ends up with both of us being upset/frustrated

Buy a metronome and train not only monotonous tasks like chords and scales (still do it though) but transcribe by ear simple songs you like.

Make a set time to sit everyday.
It's ok not to shred yet you haven't sucked enough. The more you suck the less you suck.

Watch Paul Gilbert, joe satriani, Guthrie govan rick graham, pebble brown, rick beato, pyramid or something like that and pick a small chunk to become an expert in. Eg. Master your major scales. Get that shit down if you don't have it.
That's the keys to your musical car. It's worth the trouble to have it engrained

Find inspiration.
Intervals, plini, poliyphia etc.

Then learn modes.

There's no such thing as too slow or too fast.
There is only clean or suck.
Go too slow and go too fast.

But never stop and never give up.
Don't allow a bad habit to be repeated.

Whenever you think about guitar. Pick it up. Why not? Think about the patterns you would have played.

Be disciplined.

Like L'Oréal you're fucking worth it.

Just stay busy

Well let's start off by saying my father wasn't in my life. My mother, god bless the woman, always had a knack for finding the absolute worst prices of shits for boyfriends and having children with them. I grew up with assholes as my only role models which now that I think about it is probably the reason why I'm so bad with women. I absolutely hated my mothers boyfriends/ "husbands". The first one was there since I was an infant up until I was 7. He was abusive as hell towards me and my mom. They had 2 children who are my half brothers and they too would get physically abused. I'm talking can't sit down in desks at school from all the beatings. Sometimes for things as small as dropping a glass of water. He kicked me down the stairs once because i cried when my mother left to work. This whole time I thought he was my father until one day at the age of 7 my mother hands me the phone to talk to my REAL father. That basically turned my world upside down. Anyways The last time I saw him( moms first boyfriend) was from the back of a cop car as he had beaten my mother really bad and smashed her hand by closing a window on her hand. So mom found a new boyfriend. This guy was with her from the time I was 7 to about 15 or 16. This guy was really cool at first and didn't seem to mind that this woman had 3 kids as he had 2 daughters from a previous relationship. All is well until my mother gets pregnant with his child. All of a sudden he turns into this depressed, mid life crisis, verbally abusive asshole. He now looked at all of us differently. He would have fights with mom at the dinner table and call me and my half bros, lazy trash. And he would constantly threaten to kick us out of his house. There was a time where all our clothes would stay in suitcases because we never knew if we were sleeping there or at a shelter that night. Guy was an absolute asshole. I wanted to fight him every time he would start an argument but I was only a kid
I'll continue if anyones interested

>talent
Great bait there mate
>there's no such thing as talent, its all about practice
I've been playing for 10 years and have sold records, I think I'll be the judge of my capabilities of something as subjective as music, rather than a troll in a feels thread on Sup Forums.

You're implying your the exception by assessing what's good and bad advice, since you consider people posting in feels threads incapable of giving advice. It's a P - NP related problem.

Thanks man. I got really into writing about a year after, but I couldn't do it for long periods of time because the focus wasn't there. I was always so tired. I did try pot for a while, but it probably wasn't under the right conditions. First time, I did feel actually happy and light for like five minutes, then it went way. Maybe the weed I got was just bad, but after that it didn't do much for me.

You haven't sold anything. Let's be honest. And claiming as much on Sup Forums is just pathetic.

To say that talent does not play a factor is idiotic. Those asian kids playing amazing guitar with no soul is very different then hearing the greats.

you're*

I never implied your advice was good or bad. But taking advice from losers isn't productive. Neither of us have no way of knowing what's advice that would actually work because like I said, we're still here.

Yeah thanks man that's good advice, but I'm no longer a beginner and I know how to practice. It's just that I can't always play like this.

vocaroo.com/i/s1SqA9V5vL39

What a load of bullshit. Jimi Hendrix got great by playing a lot of music, not by playing a lot of scales. That's the difference, not some inherent talent. Asshats can't pick up a guitar and just play, unless they've played other instruments before. Even then, they can't play.
>why the fuck am I replying to this bait?

So by expressing moments of self doubt means that you're a loser incapable of giving advice then? How are you able to determine this, if you're a loser yourself?

He got good because he worked hard and had talent. The shear number of guitarists out there is staggering. Those who stand out are usually the ones with talent. There is a clear dividing factor.

I have a buddy who plays great. But his recordings aren't anything that would ever move you.

Just accept your mediocrity. I didn't say you couldn't make money. You'll just never be remembered.

Lol that's not really depression then if you're doing things you love and getting satisfaction?
Also post your amazing songs??

I get the idea, but I think it's a big call to pretend that all songs are depressing or blues jams.. because anything that provokes a physical reaction is enjoyment. That and not even all blues is sad or depressing.

Thanks for telling me how superior you are though

:) I don't even mind. I already feel like shit kek. Are you just trolling for easy targets to compensate for some inadequacy?
We're friendly here, no need to hide

You're spending your time in a Sup Forums feels thread. We have to draw a line somewhere. This is a loser hangout. I don't see how you find that to be a controversial opinion.

At the very least I don't think anyone can disagree with the fact that we shouldn't be taking advice from losers.

Fucking keks.

Holy shit.
I feel better


I challenge all to read this and not fuck your sides off

I've sold music in a niche genre to people from all over the world. I never claimed anything grandiose, but I have no reason to prove myself to someone who simply states how shitty others are without putting themselves in the firing line. You're a bottom feeder, and you know it.