Alright fags I can't be the only one that spits on the toilet paper before I wipe myself. You guys do that too right?

Alright fags I can't be the only one that spits on the toilet paper before I wipe myself. You guys do that too right?

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Yes, actually. I also like to hang about a strand of about 7-10 individual pieces of toilet paper between the seat to catch my shit as it falls. This way my arsehole isn't splashed by piss water and I get to bask in the glorious stench of my unsubmerged shit.

No i wipe my ass first then take a shit do it right bitch.

Wow this is the first genuine post on this shit site that I relate to.

I totally do. Brought it up to a friend once and he called me a weirdo. Never told anyone again

Wiping?

>2017
>still wiping
literally everyone is eating the dirty booty
man up pussy

Not weird at all fag. I actually get completely nude before taking a shit. At work I just takeoff from waist down.

Why? Just why?

I use baby wipes to clean the shit off, as it does a better job than dry TP. Then I use TP to dry my bum after using a baby wipe or two. When I build my custom house in a few years, I'm going to have those things that skirt water on your arse

I do it every time. Thought I was the only one.

Toasting an epic bread

youtube.com/watch?v=E4BjjI5S2tE

There are by baby wipes everywhere you go man. Spit is actually pretty good, rich in enzymes to help you get a better clean/smooth wipe and leave your asshole happy.

Gross. Dude If it's that bad wet it on the sink. Total nigger move.

I don't do that myself, because I don't want my ass to be sticky with spit, I get why you do it tho.
I've alternative methods, like when I feel it was a sticky one I either hope for poseidon's kiss and use that as source of moisture or I just lean over to the sink and wet the toilet paper that way. Mostly just jam my fingers up my ass (just the tips) and clean it out until there's nothing left to wipe.
Dropping some wisdom on your ass right now

OP here. Thanks man, I'll give that a try next time.

You people are a bunch of cavemen. Get a bidet attachment.

You must have a hideous asshole then you sick bastard.

Do i for the final wipe.

Actually get a new bathroom right now and decided for a shower toilet for 3500 EuroBucks. So no paper in future.

Geberit 8000plus

People have been wiping for centuries. Until we develop a better way, toilet paper will still have power over us.

Wet TP is your friend, it also comes travel-sized. No more problems with car seats in a hot summer...

>Until we develop a better way

We have. It's called a bidet. And it's a plus for fags like OP that like their bumbs played with.

Hello me

No. Youre the only pig doing this. I usually wash my butthole after taking a dump

I spit on it AFTER I take a shit. You know, to show the shit who's boss.

I shower water onto it first, then clean with bare hands, with soap. it's not that disgusting.