What`s the craziest shit you ever pulled off?

what`s the craziest shit you ever pulled off?

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Tried to kill my teacher by poisoning her, successfully put the hand sanitizer in her unattended coffee

>got away without anyone noticing
>She was only out sick for two days
>feelsbadman.jpeg

grinded no limit poker tournaments for 3 years with shit results

won $30,000 two weeks ago woohoo I`m going to Rome baby

Breaking into an abandoned insane asylum. There's a 10 foot fence around it and a security guard on duty but he was just fapping in his car.

We had to undo screws on a boarded up door to get it. It was spooky as Fuck

Got a psychic to admit he was a fraud without him noticing it. Called into his online radio show and told him I was basically a proxy to slenderman and it was all his fault. Fucker lost it once I started blaming him. He hung up on me and kept going on about if he didn't know if the last caller was real or a prank, kept muttering oh my god what the fuck.

>the craziest shit you ever pulled off?

back during a blizzard I was trying to get around a house but the snow was too thick so I took a rock and broke into their house. I also took a few things then left through the front door undetected

what

These digits

I clogged my high school's bathroom for 4 days.
Also shat in the urinals.

get thread

...

I paddled an inflatable raft meant for 4 people over 3 miles round trip. I was alone except for my dog and had very limited supplies. I did it because I wanted to go to an uninhabited island a little over 1.5 miles from where I launched the raft. Spent about an hour there before returning, 8/10 would rate again. The distance may not seem long, but keep in mind, this is a large raft with a lot of surface area that gets blown around by he wind like a beach ball.

I've also sailed a catamaran through a storm alone. I was in a bay for part of it, ended up crashing into a mooring in such away that one of the hulls of the cat was on each side, but I managed to get it free and keep going.

I have a couple more stories about shit I did on the water, some are things I'm proud of accomplishing, some are of me being a dumbass, some are of times I saw other people fuck up or pull off something crazy. I used to race sail boats, then became a sailing instructor for children for awhile.

I also taught myself how to make pretty much any balloon animal you could ask for in less than 2 weeks.

This is an official get thread

Nice.

Your mum's pants

...

Funny AND original!

A truly winning combination !

I put my shoulder through a door of a vacant house to get my cat out.

Hank you

I dropped my friend to the starting line of the marathon, decided to run with 5000 other runners just to test myself.

Prior to that I have run 10 km max.

Completed the whole 43 km marathon in 4,5 hours only stopping twice.

I was in sweatpants, a hoodie, a backpack and nike skateboard shoes. This killled my knees, I couldn`t walk straight for the next two months.

this
youtube.com/watch?v=0w0PPj-b3TQ

A lady my wife knew called me and said if I could ruin her husband's Corvette in a way that a mechanical idiot would throw it away, but a real mechanic could fix it cheap, she would make me very very happy. Oh, and don't tell the wife what you're doing. I didn't get that but I could do the job so I headed to her house. Hubby was on a business trip so I had a couple days, I only needed 10 hours. I disassembled every piece of that car and drove hither and yon to hide the parts. It was a number matched 67 Stingray with a 396, only 60 or so ever built. When I was done the only thing left in the garage was the shell with glass in it, and the whole motor except the block. When he got home a deputy sherriff was there to serve him and give him 30 minutes to haul his shit away or forfeit whatever he left. He hauled ass to load up his truck while being hounded by his wife I heard. He drove the truck out to the street then came walking back with his vette keys. He threw ooen the garage doir with a flourish, and fell over. He had 5 minutes to get his shit out or lose it forever and his baby was a shell and odd bits just laying around. He actually got arrested for assaulting the officer because the officer wouldn't arrest the lady for ruining his car. All this because the husband had a side chick. The reason my wife had to be kept in the dark, guess. It took me a week and a half to put that Vette back together, mostly because I got stopped every five minutes to get my dick polished in ever more exciting and titillating ways. The wife, she's still around, I din't care who she bangs and she was setting him up anyway, the lady just didn't know it until later.

Stupid and fake

triforcing on my first day here

Bump

I want to run a marathon once in my life

I fucked my daughter on a public bathroom changing table once.

I`m sure I will never do it again.

Walked to school in a blizzard, my school was 15miles away.
Walked to school on record high day. 102f
>Welcome to Colorado
Evaded police by crawling through a very large field. Probably crawled a full mile.
Managed to shoot the wings off a dragon fly with an air pistol
Avoided being shot at a party way down south.
I have a few stories. Ask away

Went from being a massive Sup Forums Sup Forumstard to a 5th out of 422 in a 5K race. I'm now a massive Sup Forumstard once again.

Also jumped over a monster truck in 2000 on a dirt bike.

Man, my life has gone to SHIT.

>> 17 years old
>> Every weekend we would go out with group of friends
>> Get wasted no matter what
>> Smoke a lot of weed too
>> One particular day got really blacked out
>> Cause a huge fight with another group
>> Black out
>> Wake up the other day in the middle of a park totally wasted and with a lot of bruises
>> Dont remember nothing
>> Lost wallet, money and even cellphone
>> I was 10km away from the inicial fight
>> wtf
>> happened 3 times more
>> Didn't went out with friends ever again and im here :D

I was a mess so.. now i stay home and play vidyas.. At least i tried that life, but it aint for me

(marathon guy here)
I used to jump down 15 stairs on my bmx in 2008 and had a hot and popular gf


now I hardly ever leave my apartment, damn...

I snuck into the Bohemian Grove before Alex Jones, took pictures and a map of the area which had a members list, and then left

And I was in 7th grade, eat a dick

...

102? That's pussy shit. I ran 10 mile cross country practices in 111 degrees down in Texas.

Story?

Another story

>> 20 years
>> Had work and gf
>> One night we go out with group of work
>> We go to one the girls coworkers
>> She has the whole backyard with Marijuana Plants
>> Real deal grower
>> She hands me an ounce of weed
>> Already a good night
>> Get lil bit drunk
>> We decide it would be fun to go out to a club
>> See my ex on the club
>> I fuck a coworker in the bathroom and cheated my gf
>> First time cheating
>> Ego lifts up as fuck
>> Feeling like the king of the world
>> We go back to the growers coworker house
>> Really drunk with other mate
>> We decide it would be cool if we stole a plant
>> Distract the grower girl
>> Stole a plant
>> BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE


Saw my ex, fucked a girl, free weed, cheated my gf.

That was the last time i went out. Im 22 years now and as I said now i stay home and play vidyas... after cheating my gf noticed and dumped me... sooooo yea.

That could be the "craziest"

I burnt down an abandoned house that homeless people lived in. No one was there at the time, just me and a close friend. We were in the garden of the house and there are tents everywhere. I set one on fire with one of the lighters I found while looting the tents. The fire quickly spreads to other tents, me and my friend book it back to my house. We checked it the next day and it was completely gone. Never been there since.

awesome

wrote 666 on a cheater's wall, she died 2 weeks later

I snuck into my headmasters office in highschool.
I took his car keys and buried them in my back yard

I've basically doubled my weight since then. Let's get in shape and start a stunt show. I haven't lost the ability to ride...neither have you. Let's get on Ellen and other dumb shows. Reinvent ourselves.

If you kill spooks no one will mourn their loss

Ashs to Ashs dust to dust

Smoked this shit

>shoot guns at neighbours car just because i hate him
>throw a mix of piss and shit over my neighbours car just because i hate him
>Throw paint over my neighbours car just because i hate him
>shoot neighbours birds just because i hate him
And it's continuing

>Met a girl off of /b who was 20, talked to her on the phone, and convinced her to fly (pay herself) and meet me to fuck.

>Blocked an amalgamation and forced a buyout of my shares on the day before the amalgamation.

>Got drunk in the Army and broke the nose of my boss (then a Major). Did not get in trouble.

>Managed to sell a failing company with a drug addict, psychopath CEO to a public company for a decent price; received stock; stock tripled. Made a killing.

>Stole a $10k generator from uni.

>Participated in a raid on a marijuana grow op with only a crowbar as a weapon.

That's so edgy... what did he do?
Or are you just plain envious?

Forgot a good one:
>Stepped in to help failing manufacturing company near bankruptcy. Raised more debt to finish plant while keeping >100 unsecured creditors from taking us to court. Arranged sale to large company, even though losing >$4m per year. Paid off all unsecured creditors. Original investor got enough cash to pay off his debt and avoid bankruptcy.

when you look in the mirror, call yourself faggot every time

Poisoned my cat.

you motherfucker
its caterday too
get hit by a bus

>Colorado
Nigga, how much air you got down there?

unbelievable get thread

why should I get hit by a bus when my neighbour poisons my cat? explain that shit

satan cant say what he has done, doesnt want prison tyme

>20 male
>had beautiful gf and a pickup truck
>met at my place with 3 friends from when I was 15
>a gay guy, a yoga-instructor girl I lost virginity with (my sex-friend for 1 year) and a lesbian (we had a threesome with the girls)
>drank 4 bottles of vodka, drunk as fuck
>my gf is clubbing in the town, she knew about them and is jealous as fuck
>3 am
>yoga-girl needs to go home
>we all hop into my pickup truck, drunk as fuck I drive through my town with 3 drunk, shouting people in the back of my truck
>kiss the yoga girl as we say goodbye`s
>lesbian wants in, she kisses her too
>me, gay guy and lesbian get into truck
>gay guy tells us his grandma has vodka in her house
>we drive near his grandma`s house, break in, steal vodka
>she wakes up, shouts at us, makes us leave
>we hop into truck. I realise I just drove like 15km through downtown drunk as fuck, so now we head back to my place through a dark forest road
>luckily no cops all the way
>back at my place
>get under blanket with the lesbian and a gay guy
>gay guy sleeps on the lesbians breast, while I finger her
>she grabs my dick
>she tells the gay guy to fuck off, he leaves and proceeds on a 6 km walk through dark forest back to his grandma`s apartment
>I nearly fuck with the lesbian, no kissing though
>I realise I have a gf I love, so I leave her and pass out on the couch
>in the morning the lesbian walks naked through my house and has a cigarette on the balcony
>she`s back, I tell her to get dressed
>she tells me "my gardener was staring at her"
>shit girl, that`s not a gardener, that`s my grandpa, who`s a neighbour
>sober
>drive her home
>go to my grandpa to tell him I didn`t cheat on my gf
>he doesn`t believe me but smiles and winks at me proudly
>2 years later
>we met with the gay guy and the lesbian for new years eve. my gf just dumped me. I fuck the lesbian

>3 years later
>I`m living alone in a different, big city
>the yoga-instructor is engaged
>she messages me on facebook
>she was raped last month

you allowed him to be poisoned. now poison your neighbor

so i have to follow my cat everywhere he goes when he's outside?

yes.

cheated on a history test back in primary school using a dictionary that had names and info on historical important ppl
beat that, pussies

>Be me
>8-10 years old
>Pyromaniac
>Friends decide it's a good idea to take me near some barnhouse with haystacks
>Start burning the hay, big surprise there
>The big ass haystack catches fire because I couldn't think what might happen in 5 minutes
>Try to put it out, no fucking use
>Ohshitcuntfuckjesusballs.jpg
>Start runing as if a Catholic priest is right behind me
>Hide in the bushes
>Hear fire truck sirens
>Wait in the bushes until I am sure it's safe to leave
>Run back home
>Come back to the crime scene with friends the next day, the barn and half the haystacks are gone
>Threaten friends that if they tell o me I'll blame it on them aswell
>Lose friends, but get away with arson

ran from the police and actually got away

>starts in a field in park close to home
>they start using ATVs suspecting I was there
>spotted
>ohfuck.jpg
>ran to nearby woods
>hide until they look elsewhere
>take opportunity to run to mom's friends house and hide under porch to avoid the cars
>made it back to the house

I ran away because I didn't want to go to a weekend respite home my mom forced me into. she told the police I came back, and they said whatevs