New feels thread, the old one wasnt finished just yet

New feels thread, the old one wasnt finished just yet...

Old:

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where did it go

pls dont die, i was talking with someone...

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I need some advice anons

there's this girl I'm talking to. We met online and started texting. Hit it off quite well texted nonstop. I text her and she opens it late at night and said (this is all in snapchat btw)
"Swrry I just saw this now
And I'm sleepy af
But I didn't wanna leave u hangin"

from past experience I know this could be the start of the end. My theory is being confirmed even more, I texted her again today and got left on read. Here are the options (scenarios) I thought of

A) ask her if she wants to continue chatting
If no/left on read just remove her as friend and move on

if yes, could cause awkwardness because she may ask (or think) why did I ask? and that just leads into a downward spiral and make shit awkward or it may work but I'd to plan out responses

B) Play the waiting game and if I don't hear from her just remove her as friend and move on

any advice anons?

So...did anyone come over to this one?

I have been there. I would confront her about it, but you do not need to be too stern about it. Maybe just ask whats up.
If she says no, move on while you can.
If she says yes, it may be a tad awkward at first but you can get over it.

some hopefully....
I tried to make this thread asap

B Don't overthink it and don't read into everything.

B because Sup Forums is always the right answer you poof

who were you talking to?

Some girl (i think) who wrote something vague about their problems and was having a really hard time. I asked to talk about it and the thread kinda ended there

it's 11:30 here and she's about an hour ahead what would you suggest then?

overthinking is my downfall...and fucks up a lot of things for me

Wait till tomorrow if you are gonna do it, its a little late tonight. Dont let it eat you up.

this one made me feel a lot of things i dont want to talk about

any idea on why the sudden decline?

It could be anything honestly, she could be very busy, talking to other people, forgetting to respond
It is anyone's guess

It was probably me, since I got called out specifically for being vague. I'm still around. might still take you up on the offer...

I dont know what to think anymore. Im 18/m doing well in college and i just dont feel like life is worth living. I spend everyday deciding whether i want to die or not. I have friends and im interested in my pursued major, but i just cant seem to find a reason to go on, but for some reason i still do.

Yep sounds like you, and sure thing, just say so whenever you feel comfortable enough

Ok, so make this the time you overthink it (which I would guess you are) and DON'T react to it.

>I spend everyday deciding whether i want to die or not. I
Why? what specfically is going on or has gone in your life that you dont feel like its worth living

It's to late to react anyway she's probably sleeping and I don't have much to lose anyway

Thanks again. Somebody will probably give me shit for this, but having the offer out there is helping right now. A lot.

I guess the problem is that nothing goes on. I spend every day of every week doing the same thing, and for what?

Maybe, but if you try a different tactic than your normal one, you might have something to gain.

Why would they give you shit for it? and no problem, I am glad to be of help.

What do you want it to be for?

go on...

So you're having an exestential crisis because you have no motivation in your life. What you need is to find someone to be in a loving relationship with who will make you feel content and who you will want to work hard for .

I suppose if i knew the answer to that question, I wouldn't be here. I dont know and no outcome of my future appeals to me, which makes me question why i still bother to go on.

I'm an actual chick on Sup Forums complaining about my fucked up shit, and all I'm getting is kindness. I'm wondering how long this magic can last!

>tfw she takes off your fucking mask

I suppose that's easier said than done. I have never had any sort of intimate relationship before.

Theres never been a better time than right now.

Haha yea I understand, well i guess there is still some decency on this site, especially on feels threads. I just want to be of help to someone, hopefully it will help me too in the process.

I did. I was the astronomy guy.

its here the user who talk to me?
i am the anon1,2,3 guy

If you are overthinking everything and it's fucking you up, I'm guessing that you are reacting to it, not just overthinking. The more you go into the spiral of doubt and trying to see every angle, the more confusing things get. It's easy to get caught up in an idea go off half cocked. But if you were to try recognizing the thoughts as just that, but not reacting to them, then you get to see how things shake out. AND you have the knowledge that it wasn't your reaction that caused the outcome- knowledge that might come in handy next time you are in a similar situation.

True. This site never ceases to amaze me.
What's going on with you?

Thanks for the talk

For sure!

Better to live than to exist, faggot. Ask her. If she cares, she'll address it. If not, fuck her.

I can keep talking if you want advice about relationships. Been in quite a few with both men and women

Theres a lot of people on this site, you will never know who you will run into.
My stuff doesnt seem to be as harsh as yours, but its just I went through a bad breakup over a year ago and still havent recovered. Lost most of my friends and have tried and failed new relationships many times.
None of it feels the same either...
sorry for my rant, I am supposed to be the one helping you lol

Ive heard all of the advise about "joining clubs" and "just getting out there" and yet every single girl i have met are not interested, and frankly ive lost my motivation for seeking out girls.

I hate my life, but I'm unwilling to try to change it. I'm going to die never having changed, a complete and utter fuck up and a waste of space.

>for seeking out girls
have you tried men, or even better, traps?

Litterally so many desperate attention whore traps will throw themselves at you if you have an above average sized dick.

...

we all still here...?

Should i take my meds tonight?
I know it seems dumb that I'd ask that here. I just don't know if i should bother taking them. They don't seem to work. I think I've actually gotten worse since i started.

Men and traps just dont do it for me. Its also not about the sex, i dont need sexual affection. Just emotional intimacy with another person. Maybe im doomed to die alone.

I think ranting is what we are here for, and I can use the break from feeling sorry for myself. What do you mean when you say none of it feels the same?

I guess you are right.
Well like my emotions arent as strong as they used to be, i cant feel love like I used to, i feel almost numb sometimes when I know i shouldnt. Maybe I just havent found the right girl.
But then again, like no girls show interest in me and I swear im not ugly.

You are not doomed to die alone. Right now, there is a girl (fuck it- there are many girls) feeling the exact same way you are, and wishing they could meet you. They just haven't yet.

I have no life skills.
I can't even get myself to microwave food anymore.
I just care less and less each day, or more accurately, actively let my control over myself and will slip into oblivion.
I'm dead in the water and I haven't even hit 30. That means I have several decades of this until I die of natural causes. I'd love to kill myself, but I don't trust myself to not fuck up anything short of a shotgun to the roof of the mouth.

>Just emotional intimacy with another person

Well i completely understand what you are talking about, being intimate can involve having sex if you both really like eachoher. You would be surprised just how intimate sex can get between true lovers.

But since you like women you are going to have a decent challenge ahead of you. Fear not though, i suggest trying out both ok cupid and even tinder and just be completely honest with people. You seem like you dont feel comfortable going out to meet girls so i think online dating might work better for you. I know tinder is a hookup ap but i have been told some people actually use it for dating.

Other than that just work on your confidence a lot. Women REALLY REALLY like confidence to the point where ugly ass men can get laid on a daily basis because of their swagger and bravado. Just fake it till you make it. Dont be overconfident and arrogant, just be cool calm and collected.

Can I be blunt (but without judgement.)
If you are feeling like that, it might be showing through when you are talking with women. We are usually pretty good about picking up on it and steering away

Thats a comforting thought and maybe you're right. I guess ill keep going and see what happens. Thanks for talking to me, it really helped and i didnt think it would.

I guess my point is, you may have to heal before you are coming across as "ready"

No one can help me because I won't help myself. My shitty life is of my own making.
The funny thing is, objectively, I have it pretty good. But I can't manage to care enough to do anything.

why do you want your life to be fucked up. Why are you scared of success.

Glad I could help. We all have baggage- you just have to find the matching set.

I agree, it may show up sometimes. When I talk to women I usually put all that away since I am just happy to be talking to a girl.
But sometimes they just act like I dont exist, it just feels bad.

Yea I do agree, but its kinda scary since it has been over a year and I am still not ok...

I appreciate the advice.

Don't think I deserve it. Apathy. Crippling fear of failure in the way of even trying at all. Unrealistic expectations. Worried that if I start doing anything, people will start to have higher expectations of me, and when I fuck up I'll just be more of a disappointment. Lack of self-discipline, self-worth, and enough motivation to get me to do it.

Take your pick.

You have to want them to work. And you have to believe they will. Your mind is very powerful. That's why the placebo effect works.

Just promise to not give up. I know life can be rough sometimes but we all have shit to go through and sometimes it just seems worse than it actually is because we just constantly keep going over all the negative stuff in our heads and ignore all the things we have going for us.

OH and btw, i met my gf of 2 years on Sup Forums so dont think theres no chance you will never meet someone ;)

If a loser like me can find love you can do it no problem.

i can't tell whether my mind is clear or just empty

LOL...sorry but it's ironic you say that. It's been six years since my divorce, I thought I had dealt with my shit, and I'm STILL on here tonight because someone said something to me today that has made me cry for...oh...5 hours now?

I dunno if it helps, but it might not be anything against you. I know damn well I can be a raging bitch for no reason sometimes, even though (I like to believe) I am a pretty nice person most of the time.

I'll give it my best.

>Unrealistic expectations.
Can i ask a few questions about what your life was like growing up? How did your parents treat you? Did they have unreasonable expectations too? Have people been telling you for a while you dont deserve things?

I had a lot of these problems and it stemmed from the fact that my parents treated me like garbage and put way too much pressure on me to live up to their expectations.

Yes. Don't question it. Just take them.

Oh wow... see I just really dont want to be like this for several years. Love is the most important thing to me. You seem like a nice person to me at least. Also, do you mind sharing what the person said? Its fine if you dont want to though

>Should i take my meds tonight?
Depends what they are and what they are supposed to be treating.

Not all anti depressants are the same and your sytmpoms could be different from others.

I have been on 3 ssri's and 2 of them ended up making me suicidal as fuck until i got off of them. Talk to your doctor if you feel like your meds arent workng or making things worse. Do not ask Sup Forums about something they have no context for.

sorry no

>Can i ask a few questions about what your life was like growing up? How did your parents treat you?
I was the diagnosed patient of the family. So that was a thing.
>Did they have unreasonable expectations too?
If you asked me at the time, yes. Now, not really. I was just a little shit with no discipline or drive. Still am, really.
>Have people been telling you for a while you dont deserve things?
Quite the opposite, actually. I've always been told by teachers "Oh, you have such potential, if only you'd do your homework..." I've always been told I could do things, and never thought I could. I'll sabotage myself, come up with reasons something I did wasn't an accomplishment, or failing naturally on my own.

>I had a lot of these problems and it stemmed from the fact that my parents treated me like garbage and put way too much pressure on me to live up to their expectations.
Father is a narcissist. I wasn't perfect. Didn't go over well with him.

dubs. and yea i figured, thats fine. I feel bad that it makes you that upset. Nobody should have to cry for hours straight

That's just it...I don't THINK I've been that fucked up. I guess I was wrong. I have been in a couple relationships since then, and they weren't dysfunctional (other than just normal stuff) so today has really been messing with my head.
it sounds to me like it might make sense to make YOU the most important thing to you right now. Love will happen.

How we all doing? Here to help my fellow anons out.

Also, you just proved yourself wrong. I'm a chick, I am being nice to you (and not faking it) and I can tell you exist.

>was the diagnosed patient of the family.
Pls elaborate i dont really understand. You were sick a lot?

>I was just a little shit with no discipline or drive.
You are being too hard on yourself user. You were a child of course you had no discipline or drive. IT seems like you had parents who were often angry at you for acting like a child and not an adult. I think you are letting their negative behavior towards you affect how you see yourself.

>I'll sabotage myself, come up with reasons something I did wasn't an accomplishment, or failing naturally on my own
Yeah i bet that was really tough. Im sorry you had to go through that user. But you need to realize that your parents negative behavior towards you and how they treated you did not make you a bad kid.

If you are anything like me then the reason you ar self sabotaging is because you felt too much pressure and couldnt handle it so you ended up failing a lot. This lead to you developng the unconscious belief in your head that you will always fail at things and because of this your unconscious mind is sabotaging any sucess you mght have because it is so used to failure and wouldnt know how to handle anything different.

I can tell you how i got over it if you want.

What's wrong with both?

Then maybe life has been going alright for you since you didnt think you were in a bad shape, but maybe whatever that guy said just really got to you.

Since i have no love in my life I kinda have to take care of myself. Working out regularly, enjoying movies and games, exploring my hobbies more. Its all I can do really, I would just really like someone to share it with. Even just a real friend would do, like a platonic love kinda.

Haha you do have a good point there, but still its Sup Forums with all the anonymity, but I do still see your point, thanks :)

you ok user?

Hey feels anons. It’s been a long time since I’ve visited one of these threads. About a year ago I would visit these threads frequently, posting images and helping anons through their various problems. I’m no trained psychologist, but I did what I could. I just wanted to let you all know that there is hope. And while everyone takes a different path, and some things work better for some people, I feel like telling my story might help some of you find your own way to happiness. Or, at the very least, general wellness. (No greentext because I’m not great at writing in that particular format)

My story has no real hard beginning. See, that’s the thing about these kinds of things. They often grow over time. The seeds were sown long before they ever bore fruit, if you will. I was always a bit above the curve in terms of intelligence, but considerably behind it in terms of maturity. This is mostly due to the fact that I started primary school about a year before I should have due to a minor mistake on the part of my parents. As a result of this, I was often considered to be the immature one, even long before we were old enough to know that it was an issue of maturity. I found myself frequently excluded by my friends due to my behavior, and was only really able to remain steady friends with the other rejects. My best friend for years and years was a kid with ADHD and a few other minor mental conditions that were so debilitating he had to wear a weighted vest to take tests, and he even to this day doesn’t seem entirely… there. I’ll refer to him as Al if I ever mention him again. The rest of my best friends were the fat losers who started playing pokemon as soon as they were old enough to hold a Game Boy and got into card games like YuGiOh and Magic at the age of 9 (Don’t get me wrong, I love those guys to this day, but understand I wasn’t exactly of the kind of kids who played handball or Tech Decks during recess).

Cont? If there's no interest I can stop

Diagnosed patient is a psychology term. In a dysfunctional family unit, the diagnosed patient is the member of the family who is understood to be troubled, when it's not something wrong with them as a symptom of the dysfunctional family.

Nah. I always did well on tests. I just have never put much effort into anything. If I wasn't good at it, I stopped trying. That's what I meant by "unrealistic expectations".

>If you are anything like me then the reason you ar self sabotaging is because you felt too much pressure and couldnt handle it so you ended up failing a lot.
Nah. My mom's bipolar and my dad's a narcissistic, optimistic hippie with anger management issues. I never really stood a chance of normal psychological development.
>This lead to you developng the unconscious belief in your head that you will always fail at things and because of this your unconscious mind is sabotaging any sucess you mght have because it is so used to failure and wouldnt know how to handle anything different.
I have a conscious belief that I'll fail at everything, because even if I don't, I'll make myself. I won't let myself succeed, therefore I won't. I don't care/hate this enough to change, I don't have any self-worth to make myself want to change enough, and I don't have enough self-discipline to just push through it. I have none of the building blocks required to dig myself out of this hole.

I keep flipping between what he said and how I reacted. This wasn't some sort of deep emotional thing but he was a nice guy. I panicked and ran and I don't know what is scaring me more- what he said or how much I panicked.
Those are all good things. Working out certainly isn't going to hurt your chances.

I'd rather die than succeed in life, in the long term.
But short term, sure. As long as my uptime on distracting myself is high enough, I can be able to be happy enough to say that.

So it wasnt something that cut deep into you? Hmm, well idk what he said but it seems to have warranted your panic, so I would not worry about that.

Haha yea it wont for sure, i already have a good body, but could use some touch ups lol, (and not trying to be arrogant) so it helps. Seriously considering joining the army in the near-ish future too.

i guess what I'm getting at is whether I'm at peace with myself or just devoid of any thought, like just a shell of a person or something

Batman's such a pussy.

Fine. Fuck it. We've been trading dirty messages and he said something about choking me in the middle of it. I don't think he was trying to actually be abusive; I know some girls like that kind of play. My drunk ex held me down by the throat...I hope thats clear enough

You are probably more normal than you think. But you can only compare your mind to what you assume others are thinking, so its confusing

Oh I think I understand now... it brought back a flood of memories? If so, you can just tell him about what happened to you, he should understand. If you trust him with that information, that is.
I know he definitely wasnt trying to be abusive, especially since you said he was a nice guy. It was an honest mistake on his part, he didnt know any better.
You should recover, then maybe talk to him about that to clear everything up if you are good with that.

The person I was in love (still am) told me just to be friends, things went too fast, I'm here at 1 a.m. watching South Park, and trying to accept that they won't show the same love to me. I can't get them off my mind, even when I was trying to ignore it while out with family.

whys batman an emo faggot now

I can't. I am literally crying my eyes out again. I am just broken right now and I jsut cant. This wasnt a relationship just being dirty online i know he didnt know and i know its not his fault but i just want crawl away rightnow and i am scared and i dont fucking know why but i am just so fucked up