So my wife, who has cheated on me before, suggested we get some condoms so I could "finish inside her".
Well we bought a pack of 3 condoms about 2 weeks ago. I checked it today while I was taking a shit. There was only 2 in there.
What do I make of this? Where do I go I go from here? We have a kid together so it's not as simple as "JUST LEAVE HER LOL".
Was thinking about poking holes in the remaining ones.
Help me Sup Forums. I know you're reliable.
Other urls found in this thread:
en.wikipedia.org
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id say poke holes in the rest, or confront her and ask
start pokin, then live in paranoia for the next what, 11 months?
Just post, I'm into cuckolding, it's my thing, can people indulge my fantasy so I can beat my dick.
Why turn this thread into a den of lies.
Well if I confront her she'll either admit to it or lie. I need proof she is cheating so I can take it to court. Her getting knocked up by some other guy seems pretty good.
I can play a long game if I have to.
>Just post
Post what?
maybe she likes water balloons and didn't have any balloons. but if she is cheating, just slip your dick into her ass with no warning and no lube.
>Don't poke holes into condoms
>fuck her while using condom
>after ur done, somehow quickly poke hole in condom
>tell her and show her that you "poked a hole" in the condom
then do whatever you feel comes next.
Hot sauce injection in condoms, watch her burn
Poke a hole in both
Get a DNA/lie detector test
Take her to court for custody of your real child
???
profit
>wife
>condoms
Yeah, right.
>suggested we get some condoms so I could "finish inside her".
I don't follow. you're in a long term relationship and normally use the pull out method and only that or what?
I don't understand this plan lol
Exactly.
JUST LEAVE HER LOL
After you're done using the condom, pull it off yer dick and poke a hole in it and tell her that you "poked a hole" in the condom so that she will get mad n shit, then idk wtf is next.
Well yea. Not tryin to have babies constantly.
Something seems off about this post. Your wife had the idea of buying condoms and then casually used one out of a 3 pack thinking that wouldn't cause suspicion? on top of realizing/knowing she has cheated on you in the past and you are already on high alert? She's either clinically retarded or this is sophisticated bait.
She's stupid.
and a pothead
I need a way to make it work so I get the kid and she has to pay me child support.
Ever thought of the possibility that she wants to surprise you? take one condom, hide it somewhere in reach so you don't have to grab it later?
I have.
But why would she do that and what would it mean?
Quit being a beta faggot...divorce her and fight for custody of your kid...are people really this weak now a days??
>I checked it today while I was taking a shit.
Where the hell do you store your condoms?
Get lawyer. Bam!! Ez as 1 2 3, stupid.
My good for nothing ex didn't get custody. Kid is with me and it's all thnx to my lawyer. She couldn't afford her own lawyer and I'm assuming your bitch doesn't work.
means you having sex tonight or some other point in time.. she preparing for sex...
That you're autistic?
Yes
Yes, ppl are this weak. He's prob attached and not willing to let go. Unless she has really good shit on him, which is why he's trying to get more ammunition for his case.
Ive moved thousands of miles away from my parents and talk to them as little as possible.
Things are way better now, we can talk about what matters, I visit about once a year and that's about it.
Careful what you do for your kids.
Turns out unhappy parents playing games aren't that fun to be around.
I'm 27, live in a tiny shack in the woods, but fuck me if I'll ever ask either of them for anything. I'm not just an anxty teen.
If there is one single thing I can't understand in 2017, it's the fucking guys that are being manipulated by bitches.
You guys are fed with the western media, so you end up putting these hoes on a pedestal...
How the hell can you even say "she cheated on me before" and still be with that pussy? I don't get it.
There is only one thing to do here and it's to beat the shit out of her. But that bitch, and any other western bitch in this world, will try to get a divorce by saying you're violent...
So the best way would be to go online and find the ebook on how to make poison at home. It's easier than what you think... and you probably already have all the necessary ingredients.
Just put some in her food and she'll be gone pretty quickly. The best of all of this is that the autopsy is gonna say it was a plain and natural death.
Now, if you decide to go the poison route, you obviously want to AVOID beating her, or creating any problems with her. If anything happens between you too, and she tells her friends and co-workers about it... you're gonna be the number one suspect once she dies... and the autopsy is gonna take WAY longer and they might find traces of the poison in her system.
So, that's it... hopefully you'll do the right thing... and hopefully you'll learn to STOP being manipulated by bitches that are cheating on you.
I suggest fucking pike holes in her belly.
Tell little Jonny she's gone on holiday, and find a nice woman.
I'm thinking you actually wonder why you are still a virgin .
Not him but obviously the bathroom??
cheated on you before
still your wife
"i cant.. muh kids"
OK, so you've given consent for her to cuck you. So from here you say nothing, encourage her to bring her lovers home and fuck in your bed, so that it's more convenient for you.
Guarantee she's not making other guys wear condoms so poking holes is just lulz.
If you stay, you're a cuck. No one gives a fuck that you have kids. that's not a free pass for someone to disrespect you, betray you, and cuckold you.
Divorce her for infidelity and keep the kids.
Well, I would hope the bathroom, where the toilet is...
First of all, document everything. Drug use, cheating if possible. Think of when she has the most opportunity and hire a private investigator if need be.
Second, don't discuss it. Get a lawyer and build the case. You can have all the fun of calling her a whore when she gets served. Until then, continue to document any failings she has
I don't think you have much experience in this realm friendo.
Bathroom drawer.
She does work.
I'm pretty sure that Sup Forums isn't your personal life coach.
No one wants to fix the shitty situation that you got yourself into for marrying an unfaithful wife...
idiot.
OK, makes sense now. Seeing as having another kid with someone else (poking holes in condom) will just net her more money, I would play the long game on this one. I would document any drug use use no matter the drug. Try to introduce her to some hard drugs and maybe get her hooked. Then document that as well over time. If she doesn't get addicted then have a heart to heart with her about maybe separating for a while and stay with a friend or your parents for a while. Make sure hard drugs are in the house. When your not around she will deffinitley be cheating. Stroll by when her fuck buddy is there and call the cops and tell them that your drug addict wife is letting her abusive boyfriend over at the house doing drugs all the time with your daughter there and it's an unsafe enviornment. If you know the right people get a gun or any illegal weapon and hide it the house somewhere let the police know the abusive boyfriend keeps it (wherever you put it). So there you go, just did this as a vague outline and fill in the blanks
Yeah. Get one of them big boned girls. Hot skinny chicks are rarely exciting in bed. Get a girl with a little belly roll and some confidence and she will make you drool stupid
Honestly, I've used condoms to masturbate with, they're good as a ghetto dildo if you fill them with water or something, or jut to cover up a normal one to make it easier to clean off afterwords
Yeah, pretty much this /thread
You don't get invited to a lot of parties, huh...
retarded.
You ever heard of a search warrant??
Poke holes, let other mr bang her and became dad of her kid, get DNA test proving he is the daddy, divorce wife on grounds of adultery and you have to pay no alimony. Make Tinder and bang younger bitches post divorce with no alimony.
Warrant? We don't need no stinkin warrant
>have wife.
>condors is still a subjet before sex
>no raw dog creampie
>no pills on wife????? Wtf???
Run Forest, run!!!
Don't need it if you keep call a social worker or DCF. They show up unannounced and if they see that it's an unhealthy enviornment they will remove the child immediatley.
>my mom works for child protective services, happens weekly.
It's quite simple if you follow the basic rules/laws of marriage:
Universal Marriage Law 1: kids never keep a marriage together, and using them as excuse for doing so *always* backfires.
Universal Marriage Law 2: "Love" may/may not last. People age and change. The more adaptable you are, the higher your chances for a successful marriage, up to 50%. The other 50% comes from her and her adaptability. You can only ever give 50%.
Universal Marriage Law 3: Marriage is continuously redefined. Cheating, sickness, time apart, bodily change, sex drive, etc. Whenever a redefinition goes too far, Marriage can end. Otherwise, you adopt the circumstance and move on.
Do you want to stay with her? If yes, stay. If not, leave.
pretty much this
ask investigator to collect pictures, go see a lawyer and done
>Take her to court for custody of your real child
> real child
Kek
Dont poke holes just to get her to stay. No kids deserve that. Confront her. This is yours and hers problem. If you cant deal with her faults then dump her.
Not doing it to get her to stay. Doing it to get her pregnant by some other guy thus proving without a doubt she cheated and simultaneously ruining her life.
Be careful about this or any of the advice about 'holes in condoms to get her preg then dna test kid top prove she's unfaithful' stuff.
Why? It depends on your country (and state if you in the USA)
In most western countries (and states in the USA), IF YOU ARE MARRIED AND YOUR WIFE HAS A CHILD, YOU ARE LEGALLY THE FATHER AND WILL HAVE TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT etc... In fact, in France, for example, it is illegal to even get a DNA test for a child to prove paternity (huge fine/jail) - only a judge can order a test and its pretty rare.
Also, in the USA almost all states have no-fault divorces... which mean it doesn't matter if you prove she fucked other poeple. It will not effect the outcome of the divorce. It may figure into child custody stuff but usualy the judge doesn't care or want to hear about that shit.
This is why I posted this thread and thanks for that post.
For reference I live in Florida in the US.
Now that you got your answer, I'm abandoning thread.
Alright im in college and my friends with religious parents can get birth control. Theres no way you cant... also, you havent used a single condom in 2 weeks? Id assume you bought them with the idea that yoid use them next time. I have sex 2-4 times a day, i doubt someone with a wife hasnt for 2 weeks. Also... why would she buy condoms you know about and then use them? Why not make her bf buy them?
In Germany, the social workers make an appointment and never show up unannounced, so the chances of taking a child away are super slim. Pretty shitty.
Poke holes she has a nigger baby then leave her and take everything she owns including the nigger baby
>someone with a wife not having sex for 2 weeks is doubtful
lmao dude go outside some more, go watch some TV
She's using them on dildos
Well what do you recommend I do then?
--
She will be home in about 20 minutes.
I'll either say "wtf why is there a condom missing?".
Or
Just go about my normal business.
Just confront her or you're fucked. Also, check if she has a dildo. now
pin hole the condoms.
keep a second set of unmolested ones for you to use.
She ends up pregnant.
Paternity test; profit for not my kid
Why don't you poison her?
You said she's a pothead. Convince her to take shrooms with you.
>Take shrooms once
>have fun
Wait a while and take shrooms again
>you take shrooms
>while she takes destroying angel shrooms
en.wikipedia.org
She dies, you live, you blame the dealer. Maybe get some money from him too after you cry in court.
OR, if you live in a place with dangerous snakes.
>go in the wilderness
>catch a snake
>put it under the covers while she sleeps
>the snake will bite her
You delay calling an ambulance convincing her it's not poisonous.
The kid will blame you for killing mommy.
Atleast you are free and have a cool pet snake.
Why would a dildo be relevant? Also, as far as I know, she doesn't have one.
She used to have a vibrator (we bought it together at a sex shop) but threw it out when it broke.
Someone already pointed out I'd be liable for the child even if I could prove it wasn't mine so this may not be the best idea.
Not totally sure I want to kill her lol.
OR burn the fucking house with her inside. You claim insurance, she dies a horrible death.
Enjoy freedom.
Do some retarded DIY wiring in the house and make sure to paint some wall with some flammable paint. Burn the house at night while she sleeps. Lock the doors so she can't escape the fires of hell.
She coulda put a condom on a dildo.
Hate me
Ask her if she took it.... she won't be that stupid and should know you find out.
that one
but better act like you didn't know the condom was poked, blame qality
She cucked you, faggot. It's your duty as a man to get revenge. Cheat on her, leave her or do the only thing that can restore your honor back:
Take her into the woods and strangle her while explaining why you're doing this and how she brought death upon herself.
The poked condom idea is retarded. Atleast get her raped. Save money for a trip in Africa. Assure her it's safe and take her to some slums at night. If they try to rape her just comply, don't fight back.
If she survives tell her a guy from 4chain tought you how to get revenge and that she's lucky you didn't give her the destroying angel.
Honestly I could probably do this I work in construction but like I said I'm not looking to murder someone.
Why the fuck would someone put a condom on a dildo?
How does this help?
The second you man up and leave her the faster she'll stop deciding to play some bullshit games with you. Take her back when she's learned her lesson like the little fucking cunt she is, but do it with fierceness. Stop choosing to get cucked. Take action now.
So, maybe you loved her once and found her great. You know better now and want out. And it's not too late.
She's not reliable and she's stupid, not sure what you found in her, but you're over it. Get your life under control if you haven't already and do the only worthwhile thing: leave her while you can, m8.
If divorce comes around and you have to pay, don't fucking do it yet and hire some detective, let's say to prove she's a pothead and unreliable. She already works, but who knows if you'd have to pay her regardless.
Ask her about the condoms, but it shouldn't matter. Get out of the marriage and start a new life, something much better. You'll be happier than you are now, you probably miss her somehow. You're not made for each other, and you know. So ask about the condoms and plan to divorce her of course.
>dildo
>condom
the purpose of a condom is so it feels better, gets in easier, because its wet. dude. seriously.
OP I have a confession to make.
I used that condom, but I didn't use it with your wife, I used it with your child.
Also if you shove the dildo in your ass it's easier to clean, especially when you switch between ass and pussy and not want to worry about an infection.
set up a hidden cam and live stream you beating the truth out of whore mouth. After she admits to cheating on your, pull down her pants and inject a syringe full of battery acid into her pussy, filling her cervix
Whoever said that you're liable to take care of someone else's kid is a troll
Are you saying I should put a dildo in my ass in order to wash myself.
It's not that easy man, child support is a bitch. Also she will take half of his stuff.
You need to get rid of her to save yourself from a life of misery.
She's a drug addict, buy organophosphates from some mexican or bulgarian(depending where you live) and put some on her weed. When she goes to the hospital, say you have no idea what she's been doing. If you live in the city in a civilized country, they will most likely have no idea what she took and she will die or become retarded.
Divorce her for being a drug addict, keep the child.
>Get a lie detector test
You mean that thing that doesn't detect lies?
why would you use a condom with a child?
kek youre fucked m8
Blood on my dick grosses me out.
Condoms. Are. Wet. You realize that it's much easier to get in and out if you have a condom than without? Especially important with a child, unless you want to use lubricant which the kid will just drink.
I've heard that, like enemas, anal sex can end up flushing you out. So yes.
if she did take them she's a fucking moron because she could have easily bought more without you knowing and if she was cheating would realize that would draw suspicion. Just ask her about it and watch her reaction closely to see if there was a plausible reason that she didn't have to make up on the spot
I still say you need to do this Africa thing, where she gets raped and then you confess you planned this all along so you could get revenge.
If she divorces you, you just deny everything in court and claim she's gone mad from the brutal nigger rape.
It isn't that simple man. I am not planning on taking her back but I can't simply end it.
I have to set up the best possible case for myself so I can get custody of my son. I don't want this stupid ass pothead slut raising him. Equally as maddening would be me having to pay her every month.
This is a troll or you're a virgin.
Uh, smokes pot will get you nowhere
If you divorce for infidelity it will be a topic
You won't have to pay child support for someone else's kid
You're with it, don't confront her yet. Or do it like, hey weren't there three of these? Confrontation will get you nowhere good
You just haven't experienced the right condoms then. It's perfectly normal for girls to put condoms on dildos for that exact purpose. You're the one who got cheated on, go save your marriage already instead of responding to this shit.
Dont have much experience/knowledge in this sort of field so idk if this flies but maybe set up a hidden camera, confront her in the same room, and have her confess to her cheating?
Your heads in the right spot. Play it by ear from here and ignore the chins
Why are you asking for our advice to begin with? you're a total fucking beta cuck to let her get away with cheating on you once. Don't give me that excuse of 'Oh I can't leave her because we have a child together' there are many guys all over the world that are not with the mother of their child, you can just get custody of your kid and move on with your life you fucking degenerate.
If you divirce here you will get fucked so far up your ass you will be tasting shit the rest of your life.
Women have preference in court. Cheating or not. There are may cases of terrible women winning custody if kids.
If she has money or a way of getting money you are fucked.
If you dont have money you are fucked.
If you own a house together you both are fucked but mostly you. Judge can make you sell the house to pay your lawyer's.
If its a lengthy divorce and bith if you have miney you will have debt. To your lawyer. And on top of that you might loose so you will also pay child support.
Fuck divorce court. Its a giant shit flinging shit show. False accusations wont get you in trouble there so she could even make up that you are abusive and a pedophile without any proof. As long as its believable its true.
Some anons got lucky or their wives were poor. But the odds are not in your favor to start.
You live in a fuck state where you need a reason to divorce. Kill her OP.
that's why i say
>If you divorce for infidelity it will be a topic
this will be embarrassing, you don't want to admit your wife cheated on you. Take her for a drive, if you don't have a car with dual air bags where the passenger side can be shut off, rent one. do your home work, just make sure she doesn't have a functioning air bag. Take her out on a back country road and get up to a speed that will mangle the vehicle. head straight for a tree or utility pole and as you do, reach down and unbuckle her safety belt. They'll be picking up pieces of her brains for a week
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