Lex Luthor has cunningly manipulated the protagonists of the last two movies you watched into a duel to the death

Lex Luthor has cunningly manipulated the protagonists of the last two movies you watched into a duel to the death.

who are they and how does it go down?

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>cunningly

lol ur mom is a witch, bro

>James Bond vs. Ant Man
Bond is fucked tbqh.

>Pineapple Express

Ugh, this will be ugly.

batman from killing joke and superman from the first christopher reeve superman movie

they aren't going to fight because:

a. batman and superman aren't idiots
b. superman talks and isn't mopey
c. they'd both figure out that they're being misled by luthor so would stage a fake duel while the authorities surround luthor in order to bring him to justice

Sounds like a pretty fucking boring movie, tbqhwy

Captain Kirk from Star Trek: Beyond

VERSUS

Atsushi, Toko and Shinomiya from Three Stories of Love (imdb.com/title/tt4396074/)

> Atsushi finds a weak spot in the bridge of the Enterprise and destroys the ship.
> Kirk sleeps with Toko.
> Shinomiya falls for Spock but can't express his love.

Victory: Atsushi.

The main guy from "The Invitation" versus the fat kid from "Hunt For The Wilderpeople."

This is a tough one. I think the kid would charge the guy and the guy would beat his ass. But that's assuming they're face-to-face. The kid does enjoy having the element of surprise.

>that very movie vs. Under The Red Hood
I'd love a double-Batman fight, but there's no way they wouldn't just dump on Lex in 5 minutes or less.

The French Connection (1971) & The Hitcher (1986)

Uh... Popeye Doyle vs. Jim Halsey? Well Jim has that badass shotgun, but he's a bit of an amateur and tends to lose his nerve. A LOT.

I'm going with Popeye on this one, he's a fucking badass.

>Jack Burton from Big Trouble in Little China
>Rick O'Connell from The Mummy
Shit that's actually a pretty even fight, they're both going to open with volleys of gunfire that will kill lots of bad guy extras and destroy the scenery of wherever they're at. Then they either lose their guns or run out of ammo and they beat the absolute shit out of each other while saying one-liners. At this point I'd lean Jack since he's always carrying a bunch of knives and he survived a kung-fu movie where Rick's fighting style is more barroom brawling. Of course they're probably going to realize they're both on the same side before it comes to that and then go kill the Chinese Mummies or whatever.

Also Lo Pan could probably kick Imhotep's ass.

Conan the Barbarian versus Robocop.

Fuck yes I would watch this movie. I think Robocop has the edge from a spreadsheet perspective but it depends on how many family members Robocop kills.

>Nu Ghostbusters
vs
>Hateful 8

Fuck, I don't know.

I'm pretty sure Christopher Reeve Superman would pretend to fight Batman just to fuck with Luthor and let him think he won for a few minutes, he always liked to mess with his enemy's heads after he beat them.

Dae-su Oh (Oldboy) vs Charles Bronson

I'm giving it to Bronson assuming Dae-su Oh doesn't get huge plot armour like he does in the movie.

>The nice guys vs suicide squad

suicide squad about to get rekt.

The shark from shallow water and autistic glass eyed Christian bale from the big short.

Shark wins.

Shark always wins.

i would absolutely buy a ticket to that crossover

>Robocop vs Ava Or Caleb, but who cares about that cuck

I'd reckon it goes more or less like the end of Ex Machina, except with Lex replacing Nathan, and him getting filled full of lead rather than sushi knife.

As you can see from the handy chart, Lex Luthor would have to be very cautious to manipulate Robocop into being responsible for just enough dead family members to cause Conan to gain enough rage for them to cancel each other out but not too many that Conan becomes impossibly powerful.

Bond has the plot armour though. He will be given the Yellowjacket suit by Q and proceed to win.

Duke and Gonzo from fear and loathing in Las Vegas

Keanu's Key and Peele vs. Jay and Silent Bob. I'd give the edge to K&P, because the other two are probably too stoned to fight back.

>Liam Hemsworth's character from ID42 and Tarzan
I'm with Tarzan

Niki Lauda from Rush (Racecar driver) and Chris Pratt's character from Jurassic World.

Death race, Pratt on his motorcycle, Lauda in his F1 car.

Uh. Would not watch.

Also, fuck your judgements. Had a bunch of movies on my DVR for the longest, time to start watching them and clearing them off.