Hello /b

hello /b

I was wondering.

Why aren't you guys sperm donors?

15 % of you have good enough sperm quality to become a sperm donor.

you
can
make
money
by
masturbating!

you already do this all the time, literally shooting money down the drain or into a sock.

why on earth would you do that?

my next battlestation will be financed just by masturbating!

you can even choose to have a closed profile, the children you help producing will never be able to contact you.

1. sign up
2. get sperm tested
3. masturbate like a sick monkey
4. ???
5. PROFIT

Other urls found in this thread:

coparents.co.uk/sperm-donors-laws-in-UK.php
dk.cryosinternational.com/donor-search
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

as a reference, i've made a little more than 3300 USD the last year just by donating

I could make more, but my gf want's to have some fun aswell

why aren't you?

UK law changed.
You can be traced and held liable for child support.

link to this? I find that hard to belive

you can have an open account, the children can contact you after 18 years but you are in no way held liable for anything what-so-ever.

I think you are referring to if people have been "donating" privately

if you go through a firm, your balls are safe! :)

Because i make $300k annually basically sitting on my ass already.
Also i got azoospermia which may be a really weird form of sertoli cell-only syndrome.

I don't because I smoke weed and you can't donate if you smoke.

but i guess there must be some students around here who could make an extra living doing basically nothing.

a shame you have no swimmers, are you able to get any children? with medical help?

I like the thought of spreading my genes as far as possible.

and I guess you value smoking higher.

cool thing is, you get your genes tested to make sure there is nothing to be worried about, and they take blood samples every 6 months to assure your health.

free health inspection. :)

He IS talking about private donors but in UK they recently made it so you legally have to provide identifying information so any child conceived can find you once they turn 18 though you can't legally be held liable for anything.
The claim is they have the right to know their genetic history.
However, private donations outside HFEA backed clinics are a legal mess so chances are you could legally be considered a parent then.
coparents.co.uk/sperm-donors-laws-in-UK.php

Technically speaking i AM a student.
I'm told they could get a viable amount with a FEW testicular biopsies and some prayers but fuck that unless i somehow someway change my view on kids and raising kids.

thought so.

I am an open donor already, so, "my" off-spring can contact me when they reach the age of 18.

I don't bother, they have the right to know where they come from

Well you're just a "donor" now. There's no open or closed donors anymore.
Medical rights and all that jazz.

Only 5'10"

im not an UK citizen buy I have an open profile anyway.

kids can stop by for a cup of coffee

there are no height requirements where i come from :/

are you from the US?

Not sure where you're from but US is the same way now cause of trump.

europe, denmark

we still have the option of being anonymous

Same for Germany.

have to be really careful though. They could always hire a good lawyer and get you later.

So, how does it work in practise? do you have to physically go to the clinic every week for 1 day and masturbate into a cup? or do you have cups at home? in that case, how do you do it? masturbate into the cup and put it in the freezer? send it by mail to the clinic?

I have an idea: what about donating to asian or Indian clinics? over there, they probably dont care at all about any legal requirements for richer asians or richer indians who can afford it. the problem is...how do you get your sperm to the clinic? send it by airmail? haha lol

hey can anyone basically sum up the requirements for us? like, what do they require from a donor? age limits? health? other? are you fucked if youre bald? etc

its faily easy ;)
you just visit the sperm bank, masturbate in a cup, get your money in the hand and walk out of there with a smile on your face

I dont have to go every week, i just go when i feel like it. there has to be 48 hours between each donation for your sperm count to raise to acceptable levels

thats basically it

check this out: its like a fucking catalogue for women:
dk.cryosinternational.com/donor-search

you can find the requirements on every sperm bank webpage

its not that difficult

yeah I know, I am in a catalogue already

apparently, I have made somebody pregnant

How much are you paid for one "donation"? They're selling it at about 1000 ...

They do a basic medical and genetic rundown to make sure you're eligible usually by your doctor.
Once thats clear you're free to just drop in and jackoff into a cup for money.
>airmail
Actually thats how it works. Only issue is its illegal to donate outside your country so you'd just go to ours then india would buy your sperm from them. You'd have to go to india for some shady backroom wackoff otherwise.
Requirements are by state/country but usually between 18-30ish, college educated or by certain IQ, physically healthy, and genetically okay.

The fuck kind of bullshit is that? You are helping some bitch get knocked up and not trying to become a fatherly figure

around 45 USD each donation

going to build a huge ass battlestation when next gen gpu's arrive!

Man, UK is the same place where a dude gets life for fucking an 18 year old still in highschool but the school teacher caught fucking her 12 year old student gets off scott-free working at the same school because the judge considered the public humiliation "punishment enough" already.
Its only gotten worse.

i am a sperm donator in australia, its criticly low, but it really doesn't help on how strict it is and all the hoops you have to run through. the government just made it legal for sperm kids to see their fathers, most guys don't want to be know to the kids, i personally dont care, but a couple of the guys i know who are donors do care.

another big problem is you only get these two sheet to look at if you want sperm, here is sheet one ill post the other sheet soon

So you're fine with getting around 5% of the reselling value? I mean, the whole "i have children everywhere out there"-thingy is subjective i guess, but price? ...

Fucking hell. I knew britbongs were a bit fucked but that's a bit over the top

forgot to mention, you ont get paid to donate in australia, but they give me $110 for a brief interiew they do before i donate. just also mentioning you don't get a photo to see the guy, all you get is these two sheets

$35-50 is average.
I got $50 each time but the place made me sign a contract agreeing to at least 1-2 samples a week for 6 months BUT they usually require upwards of 6 months between completion and payment.
Basically you jack off 1-2 times a week for 6 months, wait 0-6 months more, get paid. At least for the US. You can however just keep going for some time and occasional just get lump payments whenever.
Got $850 total but i dragged my feet.

Wow, you're even waiting for your money? So they might not even sell your sperm and then you'll just stand there empty-handed?

it don't really care, money is just a by product.

helping people out there, or angry lesbian couples gives me the lols - and I get paid to do it! not much, but still :)

Payment happens AFTER your sperm sells or until the 6month period is up.
You can just hit multiple places, at least where i live, so you're basically getting random payments of $500ish dollars every so often if you keep it up.

in denmark you get the money before you deliver in the cup, at least in my sperm bank

Only my woman can taste my Divine Blood, user

so people wanting to buy sperm has to look through theese pages?

I am in a online catalogue, It makes it alot easier for people wanting to buy and to choose the right donor

holy crap, I get paid each donation

and I have baby pictures in my profile

australia needs to step up its game!

You guys have a legal limit per year and amount of places per person you can donate to though. It's to prevent consanguinity due to your nation size.
America i get paid much later but i can hit up as many places as will take me.

I can donate as much as I want, but as you say, only donate at one place.

sperm gets shipped to all over the world, and can only be used 12 times in denmark

it can also be used for research

but why visit more placed, if you have to wait 48 hours between every donation?

do you have a limit of times you can donate each place?

Most places only want 1-2 samples per week max. Common is 1/week but some will want less.
Its usually contractually applied to you as well so you can't just show up and say pay me whenever outside the imposed limits.

yep, in australia, thats all you get, hand written things on paper.
could not agree more, i want to get paid more and have a photo of myself, its only fair

I hope that's a troll.

Please tell me no one wants that sperm.

Imagine inflicting that on your kid.

Cause he gets born

I liked "surprisingly smart for a clown" :)

Because you won't get a single dime here in Austria for spending your sperm. Also you won't be able to stay anonymous.

Different user but i'd pay big moneyz for my fyrstr mǫgr to aspire for a seat in Valhalla.

im sorry

obviously i though the same rules applied everywhere, but it seems like they are alot worse :(

>using emoji's on an image bored
fuck of newfag

IMPORTANT QUESTION

Do I actually get paid more for having "desirable traits"? Like if I get in shape so my face isn't fat anymore will I get paid more? I heard women like to get donors with high IQs, if I can score high on a certified IQ test will that help? Is job/net worth recorded or anything? Doesn't make much sense mothers would care about that last one for donor purposes, but you know, women.

If I wanted to be an "open donor" with an entry in the catalog and my rough genetic background listed and all of that, would I need to go to a private clinic for that? Anything special I would need to know about it?

Diabetes in the blood. I probly have it as well, too scared to get it checked.

You get graded mostly on sperm quality but the IQ test done is to ensure you're above a certain level ontop of being a college graduate.
Women will probably pay more for better "traited" donors but you will only ever see the set amount of money you agreed to in the contract which is an average of $35-50 per sample at a rate of around 1-2 samples per week.

Catalog entries are from government clinics.

Contracts ensure you aren't there too often but regularly so the best you can hope for is 2 samples a week at $50 a pop assuming your a top-tier donator.
If you're in the US you'll sign a 6 month contract of around 1-2 samples a week then get paid 0-6 montgs after when the sample is sold or their end of the contract requires payment.

pay is the same however you look
there is no iq test (in my spermbank)
job is recorded, im a police officer and my profile says so
your heigh, weight, build is noted (like hair color, face shape ect.)
you have to go to a clinic to be a donor and get your profile done

and all of this differs from country to country

im off to the gym now

happy masturbating!

I'm going off the assumption he's in america.

Is a 2-year software degree good enough for the college part?

So can I still get paid max with degree + high enough IQ even if I'm a cashier?

Not sure about the actual requirements need to claim a "degree" but i'm told an actual diploma from a secondary education is required.
Does that mean a diploma from a chef school will be considered? No idea but a bachelors in anything is a guaranteed in.

I have a diploma, it's just the short version of the 4-year degree from the same college offers, so it'll probably be fine.

...

op here, I didn't even show my diploma, have a bachelors in physiotherapy.