Should I join the marines or any other branch of the military?

Should I join the marines or any other branch of the military?

>be 20
>no job
>no friends
>no girlfriend
>still live with parents

IMO go Air Force or Coast Guard, higher quality of life. If you have people you don't want to leave behind then go National Guard for some paid education and benefits.

Know the basic grease monkey shit and can swim?

Navy is pretty fucking chill if you don't mind just doing maintenance/staring at a screen for hours.

Same for the air force, it's mostly mechanic work, you're not going to be flying the billion dollar planes..

do it, if you die fighting for your country at least no one really gives a shit

I know Air Force is mostly looking for mechanical right now. Army is expanding in all fields and they 2 year contracts now while the other forces are currently doing 4 minimum. Might try an Army medical field for some schooling and live experience. - from an Army 68W

Source: Am Marine

Pros: Dress Blues for getting women
Female Marines (Wooks) only bang other Marines (usually 7+/10)


Cons: Treated equally like shit
do stupid shit day in and out
Bullet Sponges
hate life if you don't get with the program
get stuck on ship or a FOB that gets no action

Join the Marines, kick some asses, earn a bit of money and fuck some bitches. As easy as that

Kill yourself, fagg

What kind of workouts should I do to prepare for basic?

be able to do pullups / pushups
crunches like a motherfucker
be able to run 3 miles under 28 minutes

>Learn instrument
>Join marine band
>Get all the perks and none of the dying

Join the navy or air force and get a job that can give you a future outside the navy. Peoppe do 15 years as a shit grunt or someyhing and get out and work minimum wage jobs still. Driving a tank or shooting rag heads doesnt transfer over to civilian life. I did 6 years for the navy as a radar tech and inhave no degree, which I regret, but now no make 80k working on electronics with oeople who have bachelors or higher .

Joined the Air Force for the same reasons basically, so far it's been great

All branches get equal pay but they do not all have the same quality of life. I'm Army stationed at an AF base and it is so much better than my past duty stations.
The order IMO of quality of life:
1. Coast Guard 2. Air Force 3. Navy 4. Army 5. Marines

If you are going to serve your country, why not choose the one that will treat you better?

My bad on spelling, my autocorrect is garbage

>Air Force
Ok agree with that
>Coast Guard
Get the fuck outta here

I went Navy, since I figured that I could swim farther than I could dig a foxhole.

Yeah dude u either die a faggot (u now) or you leave natural selection decide and on go become an hero and kill chinks

As a soldier, it was the best decision of my life. I was going nowhere. Dropped out of school, heavily using drugs, no friends, still lived with parents etc
I've gained the best friends of my life, got clean, have a beautiful fiance, and a job at a private security firm that pays $300,000 a year.
Go to your local recruiter and get your questions answered. You won't regret it

>Get the fuck outta here
Hey man, puddle pirates play a part too. Maybe not a big one... haha
Uniforms stand out though

>as a soldier
getting hooked up in the Army is arguably better than the Marines. They cut you loose once EAS is done.

join the skinheads you fag

No matter what branch you go, make sure you know what your job does. Usually they will publish job guides with fairly accurate descriptions, but check testimonials from people who actually worked it. Everyone is gonna bitch about their job, even office workers, so don't get discouraged.

I became a jet mechanic in the Air Force because FUCK YEAH, working with multi-million dollar supersonic murderjets is awesome. And it is awesome, until it's 2 hours into the next shift and you still gotta pull and replace that hydraulic pump on a jet that's supposed to fly tomorrow. For some people, that was a blast. For me, it was a fucking mess.

however, they will teach you to kill without remorse, harden you up to do said killing, and then let you do the job you signed up for. Just do not go 03, unless you really want CoD: Real Life Edition - No Respawns

>accurate descriptions
Join the Army as a "health care specialist"
Gets to AIT and hears Combat Medic for the first time haha

Marine here,

If you like doing stupid shit all day and waiting around for word til late as fuck for no reason and being treated like a child 24/7, then the marines is for you.

My Brother!

...

Basically, you'd need to ask yourself what type of guy you are.
Do I not give a shit about anything?
>Join Army
Am I a hyper-energetic fitness buff?
>Join Marines
Do I enjoy working with my hands/machinery?
>Join Navy
Do I hate being anywhere uncomfortable?
>Join Air Force
Do I enjoy kissing the boys?
>Join Coast Guard

Lies.
You need a high school diploma in order to enlist in ANY of the armed forces.

Also, don't they test you for drugs?

Go navy nuke

He probably meant college.

And they do test but only for Marijuana. He was probably clean by then.

Personally see it as:
Marines - Grunts
Army - Slightly less grunts
Air Force - Regular people + Aircraft
Navy - Regular people + boats
Coast Guard - ?????

>Clean
>Junkie
Pick one.

Run you dumb fuck. If there's any one thing you should do, it's run. Arrive at basic with as little excess fat as possible and you'll just have to put up its the mind-fucking.

They test for more than weed. Have a SGT getting kicked for coke. Great guy too

With the mind-fucking*

according to your description you are a useless piece of shit, you'll fit perfectly with the rest of the useless retards
go and save the world from all the bad guys! lol

This

Endless fucking running, until a few miles is like a walk to the mailbox and your legs are bulging out/looking like tree trunks.

If you're fat or super skinny you'll also need to be able to do some pull ups, so once you have the stamina you can focus on that.

There are civilian options too. Maybe a technical school? Can't go wrong being an EMT.

Whatever happens OP, you got this!

PFC in marines rn. Life in the service has many factors, like mos and branch. But marines is a harder one, especially from what i see on base. If yoy want a challenge go usmc otherwise go navy or the such

>no girlfriend
BAH will take care of that. Just wait until you get issued your dependa

I have a small tattoo on my earlobe of a smiley face. You think the airforce will still let me enlist? also I'm 25 with no life either.

Shave the tattoo off with a potato peeler then join the Marines

I'm good on joining the marines. I was in MCJROTC for all four years of highschool and that was enough for me. Also the potato peeler idea sounds pretty brutal

Coast guard are the cops of the seas.

Want to jump on drug cartels smuggling boats, when you aren't acting as Captain's personal fishing boat?

Then Coast guard is for you.

What's the best branch for intelligence?

join the marines?

DEPENDS.

Does your Dad hit you in the head, and tell you you are worthless?

Do you get unmericifully bullied?

Did you ever cry by yourself, sobbing "You'll all see, I'm gonna join the Marines and come back and kick your asses?

IF you have been abused for being a faggot, yes, join the marines.
This is preltty much the profile of every marine recruit, ever.

doesnt mean these marines dont become good soldiers and cannon fodder, yes, the marines can beat discipline into you, and you will finally man up and stop being such a loser faggot.

just wanted to point out who the marines target for recruitiment. BUT you will grow up and man up finally, faggot.

I was Army, and it was only slightly different. I was in Peacetime, so the only thing I killed were local hookers....

OLD Joke:
Q:"How do you know someone was a marine?"

A: "the will tell you the first time you meet them... and the next time.. and the next time... and many many many times afterward"

Other choices for service that are often overlooked; Air Force and Coast Guard (yes, the Coast Guard is a 'service', though their active duty is daily interactions with Civilians

Coming from a Marine you'll be a lout more proud of your service once you're out. Whether or not that outweighs the grueling 4 years of life spent in the Corps is for you to decide.

Cardio and lower body will serve you the best.

Enlisting in the military is the male version of going into cosmetology.

Just get a job, it's not hard. Takes literally a day or two.
Get out and do shit. Find meetup.com groups in your area for shit you enjoy, find local events and go to them. Join some sort of local club.

I reckon try rock climbing.
>can do it indoors or outdoors
>social
>get ripped while doing it
>get to stare at fit chicks' asses in a harness while you belay
>it's fun and challenging

Hell just find something to do and go outside and do it on a weekly basis, even if it's "go to a cafe and read a book" or "draw in the park".

Once you have some dosh saved from your job, move out of your parents place. As long as you're not a total jerk and you're friendly and approachable you'll probably befriend your housemates and they'll introduce you to their friends, etc.

That's very one dimensional.
Military has every career field in civilian world has.

You could try and get it wavered but it is unlikely. Worked under a recruiter for a while on temp orders and it definitely disqualifies service but talking to your recruiter is your best shot.

>ripped
kek

I figured so.. Thank you.

If you didn't finish high school, then you're wasting your time

OR,
You can get the tattoo covered over in brown and black, irregular shape,a nd claim it is a birthmark. then when you earn some money, get it remved by laser

Former Marine here, Corps is the only way to go. You'll get treated like shit until at least E4 but after that it's the easiest job in the world and you will make the best friends you'll ever have while in. Also it's like a fraternity, my boss is also a former marine and i get special treatment because of it. We look out for eachother.

if i could go back, i would've waited for the air force recruiter to get back, or join the navy. the army really was full of shitlords. also i was medical so...

Honestly, I would rather kill myself than enlist in the military. At least I wouldn't be starting a nuclear conflict.

How good at you at eating crayons and drawing penises?

Yup, I heard that story too, from other ex marines, as I was gonna join officer candidate program. in those pre internet days, high tech and computer and electronic meant centcom. Fuck ending up at ft monmouth .

but i always wonder what coast guard officer training wouldve been as a career path. I think it was same place as Naval/Marine officer training, but I went Army due to family tradition. its just in my neighborhood, seriously, every loser bullied dipshit ended up in marines, and they did man up, so i guess it was best FOR THEM in retrospect, but i new the real truth of who they were, but I did not hold it against them, as we are all grown ass men now...

Absolutely. You'll grow balls so quick you'll get stretch marks down there. Puts hair on your chest, hard as fuck but you'll never regret it

Penis inspector

It amazes me.how all of you being in the US give up too easy and go to someone's war. Dude just fucking do something that makes you money, have ppl work for you. I have made an organization where people work for me, just by being US/EU citizen I can have freelancers work for me while I provide their services. YPW or your personal Workforce find me let's talk.
Fuck army, wars, shit will fuck your head up.
If you are at home not doing shit anyways start learning things that you can do. I'll show you how to market and find jobs for others.
There are also others things you can do, landscaping ( hire Latinos to work for you again) general labor ( assemble a team of people who can work ) post ads on CL online etc.
Start making money and army will sound like a bad dream from a childhood that thankfully you got over.
I am not saying ppl shouldn't defend their country, but this is not it.

MOS?

Join the navy after 4 year you will have 50k and college paid for

Go air force OP stay away from infantry , former infantryman did three deployments got out and now I'm a mailman , wish I would have picked a different job.

you don't sound like a Marine.
and if you are, you're a fuckin POG boot

Holy shit dude i'm literally the same and i enlisted already a few weeks ago. You really can't go wrong with any of the branches as long as you're not an idiot and chose a dummy MOS. The reason i chose the marines is because i want to build a strong character and serve a higher good. Marines hold themselves to a higher standard than the other branches and pride themselves in their excellence, which is what attracted me. Its not gonna be easy but nothing worth earning should be. If you're worrying about workouts don't be, when you enlist everyone becomes a 'poolee' in the delayed entry program. They have group workouts and shit like that and they won't send you to bootcamp until they're sure you're ready

I'm not saying your wrong but it's just a different point of view.

I love/hated my relationship with the Army but the pros outweighed the cons in my book.

Fucking POG

>Marines hold themselves to a higher standard than the other branches
You'll find people who say that about every branch. You sound like a recruiter gave you a note card to read off of.
This is coming from a service member so no hate, just a different perspective.

Everyone seems to be overlooking that the Army has 2 year contracts now.

OP, go Army 2 year medical MOS, and get out with GI Bill.

>joining anything except Army Infantry

I think it depends on how tough you had it. I am 32 and have never been in the army, but a lot of my friends have. Same age and older, so that's about the time when the Iraq invasion started, and all I can say that one ended up sucking dick in TJ and killing a mother and kid when he went in a wrong lane drugged and drunk as fuck. Others claimed the syndrome and some got the early pension/ ticket out. Others that had to go back were really quiet and they all moved away from San Diego. All in all most of them regretted the Afganistan and Iraq. This was at the prime of those wars, I don't know about now.

>join Navy
>fix planes
>retire in 20 years
>fix private planes, e-z money

inb4 "join military = get killed

>when's the last time the US lost a carrier

its not a day in the army unless you see at least 1 green weenie
>68w
>aka doc
>aka show me your asshole
>aka super POG
was also a leg because MEPS is gay

fuck multi level marketing.

>HAH
what medical MOS lets you have a 2 year contract. please tell me i'll wait.

I still tell the story of being at MEPS, long line of naked dudes covering their junk, one old doctor repeatedly
>turn around
>bend over
>pull your butt apart
>ok, next

until some big black dude ripped ass when he bent over.. everyone was trying so hard not to laugh..

funniest part though was the doc didn't break his cadence
>pull your butt apart
>ok, next

yup, every service holds up to the fucking highest standard. EVERY FUCKING SERVICE. we are professional service members.

BUT every service trashes the other service, talks shit about others as faggots and butt buddies. who cares.

and they all have that bullshit "break you down, they build you up" to wash out the worthless pussies. AINT no one service better than the other, they all have different emphasis that is all,

USA USA USA USA USA

Why do they look at the assholes?

to remove your head from it

If you join the Marines, don't come back here. You won't be able to shut up about it. Also if you plan to have kids, do it before joining, because your IQ will drop about 30 points and I'm pretty sure it's hereditary.

In short, join any other branch.

honestly I don't know, maybe just to make sure you wipe your ass? or to get you used to doing what you're told? both?

>just enlisted
kek

they won't be back, they'll have to remember how to spell 4chiun

>Navy

You forgot about all those damns quals and that shit we gotta get called a warfare pin

get ready

>turn around
>bend over
>pull your butt apart

the american armed forces have all kinds of dank shit to offer to you. but the marines?

you only join the marines if you WANT to be in a front line unit. if you WANT to fight. and don't let anyone tell you that fighting is wrong. its a part of what we are.

other than that there is all kinds of jobs in the millitary, my bro fixes HELO's 9 hours a day.

I guess the ones posting on /k/ left their browser open.

Go into the Marine corps and make something of yourself. Maybe you'll find some sort of purpose in life, maybe you wont hate yourself anymore.

Really? That young huh? 12 and already can crack a joke. Good stuff now go to bed and suckle on your dad's dick

sit down, stand up, shuffle to the door
jump right out, and count to 4
if my chute dont open wide
i'll be part of the countryside

sound off
1,2
....

>HA

army medical was such a shitty job. pun intended. nothing compares to when i had to assist a PA and a RN in the clinic. military chicks have the nastiest cooches i have ever seen.

Fair enough. I hope they got the help they needed.