How about an escalating boasts thread? works like this; - Anon1: My reflexes are quick enough to catch a gnat in mid-air.
Anon2: My reflexes are quick enough to catch a FLEA in midair. - when the boast has reached its logical extreme, start a new one. Let's go?
Brody Bennett
I farted so loud i woke my sleeping roomate.
Brandon Kelly
I farted so loud I woke my sleeping roommate...FROM ACROSS THE HALL!
Lucas Miller
I farted so loud it shook a cup of coffee right out of my roomate's hand
Gabriel Barnes
I farted so loud, I shook my roommate off his chair
Logan Edwards
I farted so loud, i gave my roomate a concussion
Aaron Howard
I farted so loud, I gave my roommate tinnitus.
Josiah Howard
I farted so loud it cracked the foundation of the building my roomate and i live in
Ayden Martin
I farted so loud, my roommate's eardrums burst. Now he's permanently deaf.
Nolan Allen
Everything dies
Colton Jones
I farted so loud, the shockwave circled the Earth three times and moved it on its axis about ten centimeters.
Oliver Roberts
i farted so loud it tore the fabric of spacetime
Juan Wilson
i farted so loud my roommate became ginger and lost his soul
Xavier Nelson
well shit
I can land a basketball in a hoop from six metres away!
Mason Garcia
i can land a basketball from two courts away
Chase Anderson
I can sink a hoop from a suburb away
Michael Sanchez
i can sink a battleship in two turns from three counties away
Ian Peterson
i can'T BREATH I CAN'T BREATH
Jaxon Gomez
I farted so loud I woke MYSELF up
Caleb Morris
i can sink six aircraft carriers from the other side of the world
Colton Brown
i can make a fucking crater in china from the dark side of the moon
Luke Hall
I can moon an entire batallion in north korea from the deck of an aircraft carrier stationed on neptune
Gavin Reyes
i can supernova the sun from a galaxy away with a teaspoon and a quail egg
Kevin Sanchez
I can fart a big bang that'll start a whole new universe while riding a horse in kentucky on a sunday afternoon
Colton Green
i can cause a black hole to occur from the furthest edge of the observable universe
Levi Robinson
holy fucking shit boi
>why sunday
i can eat a whole wedding cake in a minute on my own
Chase Watson
I can spark a whole new infinity of realities separate and different from our infinite number of realities from my room with a rubber band and a white T-shirt with tomato stains.
Wyatt Kelly
i can eat all of the guests at a wedding on my own in a matter of seconds
David Morgan
I can eat an entire wedding in about 30 seconds!
Liam James
I can eat myself, shit myself out, and then fuck all the guests at three weddings in one second
Jace Evans
i can eat myself in multiple different realities at once while simultaneously fucking the unborn offspring of the offspring of wedding guests
Joshua Ross
i can go to the store and get 8/10 of the things i planed on getting
Samuel Miller
I can play the guitar so well it makes people cry.
Joshua Davis
i can play the guitar so well it would make the guitar cry
Liam Adams
i can go to the store and get 13/10 of the things i planned on getting!
Xavier Harris
I can go to the store and get 8/10 of the things I planned on getting AND a half gallon of ice cream.
Samuel Morgan
I can go to the store and get 8/10 things I planned on getting and end up buying something I don't want or need
Ayden Roberts
i can go to the store and get all of the things i planned on ever getting
Cooper Campbell
My shits are so clean I don't need to wipe my ass.
Jaxson Young
My shits are so clean that other people don't need to wipe their asses.
Jayden Rivera
My shits are so clean that the world becomes a better place whenever I pinch a loaf.
Jace White
my shits are so clean that they are very clean and yours cannot be cleaner than mine since mine are the cleanest.
Oliver Morales
I shit food, and every time I cross something off the shopping list.
Carson Price
My shits are so clean I shit in someone's mouth and improve their breath
Cooper Lee
My body is so efficient I don't even shit
Noah Cooper
My shIts are so clean human beings flock to my house after i take a shit, they stand outside in awe and beg me to show them my shit I show it to them an usually they eat it, it's so clean it makes you wanna eat it
Josiah Torres
I can bring liberation to you and the working class
Gabriel Turner
is this the new 'Has Anyone Really Been Far Even as Decided to Use Even Go Want to do Look More Like?'
Ian Wilson
I had an anal orgasm so good it made my roommate start anal masturbation, it was that good. So good it motivates others
Gavin Gray
i can bring liberation, freedom and communism to you and the lower class for a low low price of 60 million corpses
Grayson Reyes
i can't even right now someone screencap
Gabriel Peterson
Shame on your horse shit
Landon Collins
my body is so efficient that i dont need to eat
Joseph Ramirez
You got me there
Brayden Hall
i can liberate your dead ancestors and bring communism to the afterlife
James Reyes
my body is so efficient i don't need to breathe
Ryder Nguyen
trips speak the truth
Austin Myers
fuck forgot my picture
Robert Sanders
i can liberate the americans
Liam Ortiz
WHAT DID YOU SAY
Cooper Morgan
ill bring 10/10 chix to the party. bro
Josiah Rogers
I suck mike pence cock
Ayden King
I have many, many special abilities
Jordan Evans
i can do this cool trick and bend my thumb back really far
Henry Martin
my body is so efficient that its much more efficient than yours will ever be in any conceivable way
Jackson Butler
They're great special abilities.
Blake Cooper
i have many many special abilities, one of which is the ability to be producing cotton balls out of my dickhole every six days
Joshua Fisher
i dont even need a body
Wyatt Smith
i don't even need a soul
Hunter Bennett
i have far more special abilites. much more than anyone could possibly ever have.
>but i have them
John Morris
/thread
Anthony Hernandez
I can build a wall to keep out the mexicans, and get them to pay for it!
Jayden Richardson
you win this round
Anthony Cook
I'm about to kill myself /thread
Bentley Morgan
you loose this round. and the war
Luis Diaz
my body gets hot babe$
Jacob Butler
i can suck my own dick
Landon Roberts
My body gets hot dick
Elijah Green
This thread is pure fucking gold
>I've done almost every drug there is
Nathan Fisher
I invented Chuck Norris.
Jonathan White
i've done every drug there is!
Jayden Taylor
I raped old charles
Isaiah Rivera
> and i, every drug there will be
Josiah Brooks
i havent done any drug ever.
Josiah Long
>L
my body gets anime babes to come out and be real life babes. >suck it faggets i win
Cameron Evans
I've never done drugs that don't even exist!
William White
Drugs do me to get high
Justin Reyes
i can suck BOTH of my dicks!
William Lopez
I've done every food, drink, and drug there is
Benjamin Thomas
i dont even know what drugs are!!!
Angel Gutierrez
Who is Old Charles??
Brayden Garcia
who is drugs?
William Mitchell
My bitch chuck norris and I came in his mouth
Easton Cox
No. WHY is Old Charles?
Elijah Howard
I don't even know what isn't drugs.
Parker Lewis
ive done all those but in every conceivable dimension,space and time possible.