Continuing the webcomic thread from yesterday:

Continuing the webcomic thread from yesterday:
Enter name:
>Jimothy

>Jacks off furiously
You're a crudely drawn box-figure.
How are you supposed to fap with no dick?

>Hang self
Your head won't fit in the noose.
WHY WON'T GOD LET YOU FREE YOURSELF FROM THIS PAINFUL EARTHLY TETHER!

>Jimothy grows his own willy.
Here it comes...
...oh!
-_-
God dammit.

>Jump out the window.
What window?

>Hire a handy man to build Jimothy a new translucent-looking wall-square to replace the one that the Nazis stole.
Hey, it arrived!
The delivery man was kind enough to deliver your translucent-looking wall-square right through the window.

>open the door and walk out
A voice in your head tempts you...
Your not sure if wandering into the infinite black void would be wise, though...
You'd have to be seriously urged to.

>dew it
YOLO
You're goin' in.

>smoke some weed and play mouse trap.
The MLG is strong with this one.
Dafuq is mouse trap?

>Play Counter Strike for sega genesis
The dew fucks that shit up.
Good thing it never existed in the first place, you suppose.

>Do a hand stand + Do a barrell roll.
You really want to, but you're not so sure it's the wisest thing considering that would be right next to the electrified Sega Genesis, in a liquid.

>Create and put on a fedora
The fedora is scavenged by the ravenous pirhanas before you can get it.
What, you didn't see the ravenous pirhanas before?
Your gaping mouth fills with the dew.
One of the pirhanas is gazing at you hungrily.
The electricity is approaching.
You're choking on Mt. Dew.
And you're pretty damn sure your dissolving, now.

>lol just drink the dew nigga
A pirhana zooms into your mouth as you gulp the fizzy piss.
That can't be good.

Huh? How did we get here? What is this madness!?
Enter name:

K, that's everything from yesterday. You can enter commands now.
>Enter name:

Mr Benis

Hipster Bitch

Your name is Hipster Bitch (HB).
You prefer the term "non-comformist."
>Enter next command.

Inspect penis lenght

>Inspect penis lenht
Sounds like patriarchy >:(
Sieg heil feminism

>Enter next command:

Self rape

Fuck a piranha

>Self rape
You're not quite sure how, considering it's already been established you box-people don't have genitals, but you manage to rape yourself.
More evidence that we live in a rape culture, of course!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >:(
You call 911 to alert them of the crime.

Up next:
>Fuck a piranha
(At least I know how to spell piranha, now).

>Fuck a piranha
That's absurd. How are you supposed to fuck a piranha if there are no piranhas around. The idea that one could existify things like windows, penises, piranhas, sega genesises, marijuana, fedoras, mt. dew, etc. is crazy. That's impossible.
It's almost as though all these thoughts are some cruel inside joke that not even you are a part of.

>Enter next command:

kys with the guillotine

Blame patriarchy

>kys with the guillotine
Oh...shit...you're ready...
YOU CAN'T FUCKING DO IT SHIT
At least you can always fall back on that. It was the mens faults.

>Enter next command:

Log in to tumblr

Order some cheese pizza

>Log in to tumblr
Tumblr? Dafuq is tumblr. Sounds dumb.
You log into what is definitely not some kind of parody, Dumblr, the...not-..dumb...
shit.
Your account name is OrangeEnthusiast. Not because orange is a hipster color, or anything.

Go to your fav cis/thin privilege rant page

>Order some cheese pizza
MILK IS MURDER, YOU NAZI

Up next:
>Go to your fav cis/thin privilege rant page

>Go to your fav cis/thin privilege rant page
The list of rules continues for 400 pages.
Among them are a number of exceptions. You are allowed because you are a communist.

>Enter next command:

chatlog? like homestuck?