I always get nervous when people ask me what music I like.
If I tell the truth, they will think I am pretentious. And since I've told the truth about telling the truth some of you will also think I'm pretentious. The whole subject is so impossibly thorny and so filled with thin-skinned people that I generally pretend not to have any interest in music, so that people only think I am stupid instead of pretentious.
How do you solve this problem? Jesus, it's like a pissing contest. If you mention something too common, they scoff, and if you mention something too rare, they scoff. Too old, too modern, etc. It's worse than a pissing contest. What kind of pissing contest do you lose for pissing too far?
What's the most middle of the road and inoffensive music I can pretend to like for the purposes of socialisation? Should I pretend to like the Beach Boys, or are they considered too dark and complex for this particular pissing contest?
stop being such a whiny faggot and tell people what you fucking listen too. if you are too scared of them finding out what a faggot you are, then just name genres instead of bands. you faggot
Colton Parker
just tell the truth, jesus. why do you care about peoples opinion ffs, its about appreciating art, not a fucking race
Hunter Richardson
Lmao, if you don't act pretentious, they won't think you are. If you say,"well, you've probably never heard of them ...but I'll tell you anyway ;)" then you're a pretentious fuck. If you say ,"I listen to (artist or band), they play (genre)" then you should be fine.
Michael Butler
I give a vague answer about listening to anything, then I ask THEM what music do they listen to, and I proceed to talk about bands they like and I know of.
Jonathan Martinez
>bands Yes, here we run face-first into the wall of mutual misunderstanding, if you know what I mean.
It's a wall of mutual misunderstanding that I am too tired of trying to wrecking-ball, if you grasp my metaphor.
Pff. Appreciating art? Have you ever appreciated music someone else has tried to introduce you to? It's just not possible. It's counter-productive, awkward, alienating, pushy, unfriendly; there are few better ways to ruin a relationship than to push your tastes on someone else.
No, this is purely a social convenience, an embarrassing hazing ritual every human must learn to endure. I'll endure it even if I have to pretend to like U2.
>Lmao, if you don't act pretentious, they won't think you are. As far as most people are concerned, naming an unusual interest is acting pretentiously, i.e. in an uppity way. I'm just interested in keeping my head down; you are one of those fortunate people who don't need to duck at low doorways, metaphorically speaking. (I am of average height.)
>I proceed to talk about bands they like and I know of. This is where /I/ run face-first into the wall of mutual misunderstanding, if you comprehend my allegory.
Mason Reed
inb4 17 replies
Ian Allen
hi unty
Julian Bennett
/thread
Justin Peterson
You're doing it wrong.
You can get away with almost anything if you talk about it the right way. Quit being such and autist and learn how to hold a conversation properly. The problem isn't with discussing music, it's with you.
Jace Sanchez
I can only assume Unty is someone whose analogical imagery you understand.
I don't want to discuss music at all, ever, because if I mention diminished fifths or modality or sound symbolism then my discussion partner will feel humiliated. That would be bad manners on my part.
What, should I only talk about music with people who went to conservatory, or is there some way of bridging the divide between me and the general populace? I think you see what I mean about pissing too far now!
Luis Harris
nice
Asher Cooper
I'm a closet musician and painter Learned in the Army how to act stupid No one knows me and it's depressing so I drink a lot
Thomas James
This but unironically.
Kayden Harris
Why would you mention technical aspects when casually talking about music with someone that doesn't know music theory? People won't feel humiliated, they just won't know what the fuck you mean.
Come on man, just talk about what you like in simple terms. Instrumentation, feelings and shit. "I like (band name) because they are dynamic/do interesting stuff/mellow/sweet/make me feel like less of a faggot."
Got it right.
Kayden Powell
>If I tell the truth, they will think I am pretentious. I bet "your" taste is some shit Sup Forumscore and other meme genres where you only know few artists and nothing else.
Adam Young
You sure showed him!
Owen Martin
judging from this post, the reason people think you're a pretentious twat has little or nothing to do with your taste in music
lol
Gabriel Parker
Man something happened to you I don't know what but it fucked you up good.
Daniel Sanchez
>"hey user what music do you like" >"I like underground indie stuffs dude" And then we don't talk about it anymore because they know that they don't know anything about "indie" music. That's usually me with pretty much everyone.
Stop being so insecure about your interest you cuck. You can still tell the truth and not being preachy. Just mention it and then that's it. Only talk about it again when they bring out the topic again.
I don't think about music in personal terms at all. It's not "that guy I like and his friends and their pet drummer" to me.
What I like or dislike is not the subject of this thread. It's what falls into the middle of the road.
People don't think I'd pretentious because I assiduously make sure that they have no reason to come to that conclusion.
Obviously, there's no hope of containing it ITT, because I am like the one guy at an ice cream fest with lactose intolerance. This is obviously not my natural habitat, and you no doubt feel that I am spoiling your fun by not participating in it.
It's pretty clearly a genetic thing, not learned. Christmas dinner is a very fractious affair with my family.
I have no interest in displaying my interests. I am appalled by the idea of it. It's an intrusive question. It's like being asked, "Hey user, what pornography most readily gives you an erection? Tell me, and make sure not to give the wrong answer!"
I would never talk about it if I lived in a perfect world, but since I am obliged to, I need to draw up contingency plans.
Jaxson Gray
What music do you like OP
Jacob Mitchell
>It's like being asked, "Hey user, what pornography most readily gives you an erection? Tell me, and make sure not to give the wrong answer!" user do you have autism
Anthony Johnson
It is not remotely consistent because I do not like that guy in the t-shirt, his friends, and their pet drummer. I am not his friend, and I am not a part of his tribe, and so forth.
I do not dislike the tribe of people who like that other guy in the t-shirt and his posse and pet drummer.
I do not know or care who these people are, but I enjoy the dissonance of their music and its irregular timing.
They are nips, so I'm at risk of seeming pro-nip by admitting to liking something that came out of nipland.
Average people are very much like women, or spooked horses, they get all in a whinny over every little intuition they get. In this case the intuition is that I might lack patriotism, or have a deviantart account, or some other thing too trivial to even think about, much less put into writing. I do not want to deal with that. This thread is an attempt to wash my hands of this bullshit entirely.
That's not a historically very well informed question to ask, user. I consider myself a neurasthenic.
Jackson Scott
my best advice is to kys. solves all your problems
Cooper Lewis
Having a fucked up home life is what messed me up. If your parents are busy dealing with their neurosis/addictions/whatever it's harder for them to take care after their kids, you feel like you aren't worth their attention or respect, you have to fight to be yourself so it's easier to not be anything, they so you only worth what you can give them, because they're broken shitty people who can't even pull their shit together to proritize their children over their own emotional needs, which they can't get out of each other, so they get that from their kids who can't provide that because they can't handle such adult stuff that young which has all kinds of fucked up implications.
It's especially fucked up if they have empathy problems. It puts across the sense that your emotions have no value, you as a person have no value. So the only value you think you have is what you would think of as the materialistic value of your personality. You fail to grow in the denial of the self to maintain a false self which is the only way to give them what they want. Except that has nothing to do with anything but the environment you grew up in. I'm a pretty fucked up case so excuse my writing in the second person. You should see therapies if this rings and bells
Jonathan Stewart
No, alcohol has that covered. I would be on a buzz all my waking hours if I weren't concerned for my liver. As it stands I take around 70 mg of ethanol when I need to endure company and it smoothes things over reasonably well.
>it's easier to not be anything Yes.
But for me, that is mostly an outer shell that protects such yolky goodness as I have. I have developed in isolation, and as I see it, it's necessary to end that isolation. Far from having made too many compromises, I've made none, with no internal guilt whatsoever, only secretiveness. I need to learn how to build bridges in the form of a non-blank false self.
Brandon Wilson
How do people end up like this?
Sebastian Morris
OP my ideal meal would be a filet mignon, seasoned with salt and pepper, cooked in a cast iron skillet to about medium rare. I'd also saute some asparagus in olive oil and make mashed potatoes.
But if someone wants to get into a debate about whether Wendy's or McDonalds has a better value menu, or whether KFC or Popeyes has better chicken (it's Popeyes btw), I'll oblige them.
do you understand what i'm saying?
Hudson Reyes
you don't know shit but think you're above everyone
William Anderson
how did you get that from what I posted?
im saying OP shouldn't be so closed off to talking with other people about music just because they don't like what he likes
Gavin Johnson
?
Yes, actually. Except while it's possible to eat not-your-usual food, and thereby get a basis for understanding, it's impossible to feel not-your-usual feelings, which in the end seem to be what drive appreciation of pop music.
Those feelings for the most part arise from social interaction. A popular musical act is half an in-joke that is completely unfunny to outsiders, and I am always the guy who does not get the joke because he arrived when everyone else was already laughing. The "joke" of which I speak isn't a laughing matter, it's similar to patriotism, except on a very small scale. Hence my use of the term tribe.
When it comes to popular music, I feel a little like a colorblind man being asked to choose his favorite color.
In my experience, people don't like what they don't know. The mind is a closed circuit, and procedes similarly to a model train, following a circular track.
I'm not convinced I should try to move mountains to make someone like something they don't like, and if I don't do that, then all I have done is expose myself to ridicule and calumny, or alienate myself by appearing to be too different to sympathise with.
Aiden Thompson
just don't be autistic. have some level of contextual awareness and know how to speak to people. you won't sound pretentious if you don't express yourself pretentiously. if someone asks you what you listen to, they're usually interested in what you listen to...
