So I've recently been involved in a lot of problems regarding my friends

So I've recently been involved in a lot of problems regarding my friends.
Most of them seek advice from me like I'm some fucking genius i don't know.
Turns out the advice i gave out was really good and most of them are living their lives a bit better.
If you have any questions anons I would be really glad to answer them,you can ask for advice, personal stories regarding some situations, pretty much anything and I will try to answer them and give the best advice I can.

>keep in mind that it's not 100% sure I will be right about shit you ask me, but I will try to help most of you

my gf fucked my dog, what do?

Probably the best idea is to record her next time she does that, put it on the internet, make shitloads of money from mentally ill faggots who fap to shit like that.
In other case kill both bitches

it's kinda hot tho... the idea of my black labrador cucking me makes me really hard

Killing yourself is also a really good idea you should need to consider

I've been thinking about suicide quite a bit lately and before I made some plans another idea came to my mind; become a criminal. I basically have nothing left to live for so I thought I'd start robbing houses/businesses/etc. and see where it got me. While moving forward with this idea I realized I might have to kill someone at some point and thought about the irony of a suicidal thought leading to someone else's death. So right now I'm at a cross roads trying to figure out if killing someone is again something I am capable of in the short term.

While all of that is fine and good and I expect to profit quite a bit from my experience. I do have one question of dire importance that will greatly affect my perception of the world. That is, why is OP such a HUGE, ENORMOUS, GAPING faggot?

I see you clearly made all that about that one big important question,
Shit, I will have to be honest,
Your mom made me GAY after i lost all hopes in a good pussy :/

Bear ate my mom, what do I do?

i just want my woman to be happy, Champ can give her things that i can't...

what's wrong with that?

Find a cave with bears in it, live with them learn their culture, do all the shit they ask you to, until you think that you are ready to kill them all, commit a massive massacre to avenge your mother.
Sell the bear meat on black market
>+$$$$

Chop off his meat and try sewing it to your own cock, pretty sure it doesn't need any professional help and you'll be good on your own.
Use black needle strings

I have one big advice for you if you like helping people.
Become psychologist and make money.

niggers don't have the money for that

okay should I add his to mine or cut off mine too and just replace it?

Can't tell if you're being ironic or not.
Still that is a thing can consider.

Sure they do,trust me

Try sewing it on about the half of yours, don't damage any of his canals so you can still cum through your new mutated doggo dick

should i study medicine ?
even if it costs a fuck ton of money and my famly will have trouble getting the money???

>should i study medicine ?
>even if it costs a fuck ton of money and my famly will have trouble getting the money???

If you feel that that is where you see yourself in future go for it.
If you study and actually give a fuck about it you should make more money than you gave in education.
Also parents won't tell you, but you are the first thing on their mind, and you come first, even if they starve you will have money.
Later you can repay them by making them proud and showing them they didn't make a mistake

i don't know about this.. champ is very alpha, I'd hate to take that away from him

think a trip to the humane society would do the trick?

Hm,if you really think he is enough alpha you can
get a bitch(a dog) and fuck her in front of your friend doggo, he will become jealous, stop fucking you bitch and she will see that you are a fucking loser and eventually leave you,dassit

I have no reason to live, I don't really enjoy anything, I have no interests or hobbies, no social life, and don't do fuck all with my existence, and I know that one day, I'll be in my 30s/40s and realize I wasted my youth doing nothing and regret it. I already do and I'm still young. I want to do something but everything sucks. People suck. I hate everything. What do?

I have no motivation to exercise.
What could I do?