ITT: We all pretend to be a regiment of Clones from the 327th Star Corps Fighting on Felucia Pre-Order 66

ITT: We all pretend to be a regiment of Clones from the 327th Star Corps Fighting on Felucia Pre-Order 66.

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Captain Drais Reporting in

Fuck these plants, goddamn.

are we looking for droids again?

I know right there's probably an entire ecosystem living on my fucking suit....really wish we got to drive the damn juggernaut.

-Cpt Drais

Yes we are, reports are the CIS forces are scattered about around the most toxic places on the planet in order to take advantage of their droid army being immune to said conditions. Keep your eyes peeled, and your life-support systems operational..

-Cpt Drais

Padme is a hot ass bitch I'd fuck. Shame that Yondu dies in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2. Spoiler alert

Nice dubs Soldier

-Cpt Drais

Captain Spock, set phazers to Kill!!! - Kirk

You know these Jedi fellas are alright, I'd like to meet one and shake his hand

Sir!
Movement up ahead!
-Pithy

Niggers

Peach. I could eat a peach for hours - Cpt Castor Troy

Where am I how did I get here?

Instead of getting in bed with Padme, I'm getting fucked by battle droids. FML.

Anyone got eyes on?! we need to make sure it's not predatory wildlife. The last the we want is an Acklay on our asses.
-Cpt Drais

I'm glad I shaved my balls before we landed on this humid planet

When we get back to the ship I'm gonna take a galactic space shit
-Fingers

Good war. Heck of a war. - Commander Jace Stryker

uIIOIIIAk-ak! rounds start fliying towards pathetic clones from the brush ahead

No one touch that white Droid over there.
-Brown Fingers

A wild honey beast appears

Seperatists Ahead!!! Get to cover now! Heavy weapons teams set up a firing position! The rest of you bastards lay down some covering fire!!
-Cpt Drais

execute order 66 and end this thread

That's a negative ghost rider.

-Cpt Drais

you guys seen Aayla Secura without any shoes on?
-Foot Fag Number 5

Damned blasters jammed sir. Grenades away
-Fingers

Ah never been harder sir.

-Cpt Drais

SIR ACKLAYS TO THE RIGHT - Generic clone 282372368

Can I get a sitrep on the old "don't ask don't tell rule" ? Are we still on that or... can we have some brotherly clone love ?
Foot Fag Number 5

you guys ever feel like we're just all.... a little expendable...... like.... clones of eachother? or something..... ?

*Yelling while in firefight* I THAT MAY COUNT AS INCEST TROOPER, BUT IT'S NOT MY DAMN CONCERN AS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT TRYING TO FUCK ME! *Takes out a couple battle droids* WHAT'S THE SITREP ON OUR HEAVY WEAPONS TEAMS!?
-Cpt Drais

Oh I have a heavy weapon for you right here *winks seductively* want to grab it?

-Ctp Vorpal

Go ahead soldier...whip your dick out on this toxic death world and see what happens.....
-Cpt Drais

Not my dick sir! The heavy blaster cannons, they are ready! Don't pull that gay shit with me comrade!
-Cpt Vorpal

Good now start firing on those Crab Droids before they get close and start tearing our men apart!

-Cpt Drais

We're gonna need to pull back soon if the rest of our squad can't hold their own in this fight!
-Cpt Vorpal

We only need to hold on a bit longer! The juggernaut is on it's way to back us up. It's up to us to keep the Seps busy while the ARC troopers blow up their forward droid control units! *Takes out two Super Battle Droids* Vorp see if you can get a rocket on that Crab Droid.
-Cpt Drais

God I wish I could just shoot Ayla Secura in the back and masturbate furiously.

Heres a Sam for you

That's Captain Vorpal to you comrade, but hold on let me see what I can do! *Loads EWHB-12 heavy repeating blaster*

youtube.com/watch?v=sNjWpZmxDgg

We're the same damn rank Captain! *Laughs and lays down some covering fire*
-Cpt Drais

*Laughs* You always were a fan of my humor Drais. Looks like the blasters jammed. I need to take care of this crab droid! *Preps several grenades* It was an honor serving with you cap! *Runs towards crab droid*

NO GOD-DAMN IT YOU STILL OWE ME TWENTY CREDITS!!!! *Runs with a repeater carbine* Hey Vorp remember that trick that one dumbass did on Utapau where he jumped on the damn things head and shot it?

This shit is depressing

Sir all this pollen is clogging my helmet filter and i cant breath

No you damn senile fool, I told you, I never served with you on any god damn mission and for the last time, you're not "Captain Drais" your name is Daniel Dent and you have dementia, you've been in the nursing home for 8 months now and you can't even remember your own daughter's face. She was in here three fucking times this week Dan, what the hell happened to you... we used to be so close... do you.... do you even remember me?

WATCH THOSE WRIST ROCKETS

*Riding a damn crab droid* That's cause you turned off your damn life-support systems off when that droid smacked the shit out of you!
-Cpt Drais

That quote is fucking golden i wish i could give you a medal user

THEY'RE COMING AROUND!!!
-Cpt Drais

For The Republic!
*insert wilhelm scream here*

I wish my armor looked like darth vader's

i love you guys (all homo)

...

Offended by the capcha, I am a fucking robot!

>God I wish I could just shoot Ayla Secura in the back and masturbate furiously.
How dare you say such foul things about our mistress!

The Droid are down soldiers I think the ARC Troopers finally did their damn job for once. And yeah that bitch saved my ass more times than I can count she seems like a nice lady.
-Cpt Drais

>shoot a droid in the body twice
>shoot head
>run to cover while laying down covering fire
>end up hitting droids with my shots
>take a knee
>shoot from left side of cover, take out legs of two droits
>take cover for 3 seconds
>shoot from over cover from kneeling position, look for concentration of droids
>go back into full cover
>throw grenade without looking into area with droid concentration
>dive roll to next cover position
>shoot from kneeling position over cover, take out 3 droids
>left flank is taking fire
>throw grenade there
>shoulder roll over cover to get to other side
>lay down covering fire for myself while I vault over log
>sprint to flank enemy some tree cover

nothing more hot than a fit blue twilek jedi badass

DAMN YOU GEORGE, WHY WOULD ALLOW SUCH A GODFORSAKEN PLANET LIKE THIS TO BE WRITTEN IN.

-Scorch

...

...

...

Guys ... anybody else think it's kinda hot that we all look EXACTLY alike? I mean, I know what the commander's dick looks like.

- PFC Faggot

...

( quietly reports the aberrant clone to kamino for "reprogramming" )

Nice Dubs faggot, but we need to get out of here, and rendezvous with the Juggernaut mobile FOB. Troopers make your peace with the dead then move out *waves hand*
-Cpt Drais

Alright troopers we're back at the FOB
-Cpt Drais

I never shoot blanks, General Secura. But you knew that.

Rookie Doggie Howser MD Reporting in. Girls love being sniffed

Fuck my blasters jammed again!!! -jd

You're lucky we're at the FOB. Turn your blaster in and requisition a new one in the juggernaut.
-Cpt Drais

Aye aye cpt! *bangs head on door frame walking out*

When we get off this bloody planet where do we go next?

Sir wat r yeh orders -jd

we'll be moving our asses back to Coruscant for a brief reassignment period.
Get yourselves ready troops it seems we got a LZ that's compromised, and if we're wanting reinforcements so we don't get blasted we'll need to secure that Landing Zone. Delta, and Alpha Squad, on me.
-Cpt Drais