Hey Sup Forums, I need honest, and mature answers and advices now

Hey Sup Forums, I need honest, and mature answers and advices now.
I've been studying abroad for the last 2 monts, and only have one left to go. When I left, my relationship with my gf wasn't the best, and it's been a rollercoaster since I've been here, only it's getting worse. I've lost my turst in her over a year ago when she lied to me telling me she wasn't smoking weed, which isn't the issue despite I hate it, but it affected me more that she lied to me. Today she tells me she's going out with her friend from uni that I've never heard about, and she said he just contacted her since they hadn't seen each other in a while. She hasn't told me she loves me in a while now and I'm afraid she's just looking for someone to get rid of me and foget me or something. I've been really stressed out here because of not liking where I am and other shit. I'm fucking sad right now.
My head's a fucking mess and I literally have no one to talk about this, but you guys.
Please just share some words, whatever.

get a new grill

I really love her, but our relationship is shit, I don't think I want another girl

First step : Take a couple of drinks
Second step : Is she hot ?
If yes : take a couple of drinks again
If not : Fuck her, ask her a sandwich and the moment you bite in it, say it's disgusting and say you break with her

Post her pics you fucking faggot.

If she is causing you pain, why not dump her?
Unless you are lawfully obligated to her or something else, and under your conditions it will be best to leave her. T

Take a moment to reflect right now about your relationship, education, and other controllable aspects of your life to determine what's best.

This is how I see it. She´s a couple of months about to finish uni and she can get a good job, she's good with her family, they are really good with me too. She's responsible and all, and she's been loyal to me as far as I'm concerned, and I've been loyal too. But the trust issue kills me, because she lied to me with the weed thing, and some other shit I was able to find out, like one time her ex called her while she was with me, and she told me it was just the alarm.. How am I supposed to be feeling with shit like that and being away and knowing she's going out with some randome guy I have no clue who that is?

Had a similar experience when my gf went to Africa for a month or two. She started getting distant, didn't really express any love she had for me, started getting pretty abusive too. When she came back she went straight back to normal, and when I asked her about it she said it was cause she was having a shit time. My advice to you is cheat on your girlfriend and don't tell her, but just make sure you're regularly fucking someone and you have some kind of proof. If she goes ahead and fucks this guy it doesnt matter cause you cheated on her first and you've just won the break up.

I dont really care what you think
you dont know what love is if your relationship is shit and you think you love her
you are just way too affraid of being alone
there are better people out there my friend
there are people just as fun as her, good looking, better looking and who wont be a pain in the ass
dont settle for a shit relationship because you think you love her
you'll never realize you want another girl until you have one that isnt shit and you see how much better it could have been

That's kind of fucked, but something I've had in mind, I just don't want to fucking cheat

Don't waste your time being hung up on her. There's nothing you can say or do to stop whatever is going to happen at home.
>what am I supposed to feel
Nothing. This will only bother you as much as you let it. Whenever you start getting an anxiety inducing thought just focus on breathing deeply and let it pass and go back to whatever you were doing. Don't fall into the trap of indulging depressing trains of thought

You've had it in mind cause its a pathetic thing to do from a moral point of view, but the thought of getting back at her before she's even done the dirty is more enticing then you want to admit. If you genuinely think her cheating is in the cards, then I'd seriously consider getting there first

I guess if you really do love the girl, explain it to her. Tell her you love her, and that her meeting up with this other dude makes you scared that she doesn't feel the same anymore - if she confirms your fears, it's time to break things off. Otherwise, work on the relationship. Remember the stuff about her that appealed to you in the first place. Compliment her. Be positive. You'd be surprised how much can change.

dont cheat if you dont want to
just realize your relationship have no future
dump her and look for someone better

How am I supposed to end things? I'm not afraid of being alone, since I was alone a long time before her. I just really want thing to work with her.

I try man, I really try and rub it off, but it's so damn hard, because she tought me how easy it is to lie, and trust doesn't come as easy as the first time after someone has taken you for a fool.

Both of you are right, can't argue with that. What I'm afraid is how am I going to feel after breaking up with her, and being away from everything and knowing I have to do my best here in order to have a beter future at least for myself, and I don't want to waste time overthinking and being depressed. As if I wasn't depressed enough already.

>How am I supposed to end things?
you can tell her the truth, how you feel like you cant trust her and say you think its better if you 2 go your separate ways
but where is the fun in that ?
you can tell you are alergic to her dog
you can tell she farts too much
you can tell she talks while sleeping and one night she described a plan to murder you and how to hide the body in very precise details, so you are scared to go on with the relationship
fuck, any bullshit excuse is enough just make up something that will be worthwhile to tell your friends in the future for a laugh

Okay well seems like you have some issues. Is there free healthcare where you are? Do the people you study with have any kind of chaplaincy? Look into CBT or MCBT to help you get a better perspective on things. The worst thing about a break up I reckon I'd the biological withdrawal. Go a few days without human contact after you've been holding your girls hand most every day before then and you get pretty down. But since you're abroad, I reckon you're already feeling that, and another partner would be able to satisfy that

>I'm afraid is how am I going to feel after breaking up with her
This is your choice. Suffer or do it but don't feel afterwards.
How you're going to feel will depend on you. If you are going to be moping around like some sad piece of shit then that's your choice. I would suggest to learn to count your blessings after the break up and be happy about leaving behind something toxic in your life.

Kek yeah, gotta look for the fun tho.
But the way things are, she's very clear on how I feel, she knows I love her and I want to be with her, she says she feels the same way. But there's just this fucking thing inside of me that doesn't let me be the person I used to be before she lied to me, I just fucking can't and it's killing me, literally eating me from the inside man, is lik this fucking notch in my chest that makes me indiferent with her some times, I've never disrespected her nor I have treated her badly, I'm just away, even if we're together, I'd love to hug her and kiss her and tell her how much I fucking love her, and I know how much that's gonna help the relationship, but this fucking thing inside me just stops me, I fucking don't know how to be, I'm fucked really

seems like its too late for that
you'll feel like shit for a while after you break up
but you are already feeling bad, so what is the point ?
you'll also feel like shit if you dont break up and keep thinking about what is she doing behind your back

you need to decide if the relationship is worth saving or not, and then whatever you do, either talk to her to make things better, or break up, and immediately try to find something else to focus on, work, a hobby, friends, pets, whatever, just dont waste your time thinking about her or what is she doing, or about how the relationship was, or how things will be without her
find something to do so you dont think about any of those shit related to the relationship
nothing good will ever come from overthinking that

tell her that

Sorry for being a little bitch about it, I wish you guys could know how much you replying to me means, literally everything right now.
I guess is just fear of what I don't know, I mean, I know what is it to be alone, but not how is it to be alone after her. I know the best thing for my mental health is to break up, but at this moment, being away and all, and already feeling like shit, that's something I have to consider, really. It can cost me the effort of being here, I am a negative person, and I can't trust my own thoughts, that's what scares me. I try to use my time, playing guitar, phtotgrapy, reading, etc. But I'm still anxious

Listen little brother, I have never given advice on here before. I probably won't respon after this comment either.
I am in my mid 30's and have been with many women. And the signs your posting about her hiding shit isn't good news. She may want you, she may love you, but there is obviously room in her mind for things she wants other than you ("freedom" maybe).
Everytime I have tried to hang on in these situations it has been misery. Even when I left them and they convinced me to come back shortly after, it went to shit.
It seems like she has some things she nees to explore or work out. So leave, stand firm and do not return for awhile. Cut her out of your life completely as nicely as possible.
She will likely return eventally (likely a message in social media or a random text some day). Dont count on it though; go on with your life, count this as an awesome learning experience and how life is, and move on.
There are plenty of women out there bro. Let any of them be the shadow of your light.

Im not sure if the best thing is to break up
but you definitelly shouldnt go on if you cant trust her
I'd try talking to her 1st, about the trust issues, and then decide on break up or not depending on her reactions and what she says

Dont break up with her over nothing, at least not yet. It's good that you're self aware about this. Apart from start looking for someone to help you move on if shit hits the fan maybe start exercising or something. You'll feel a lot better if you start working out, even if you just find stuff to do on your own in your apartment

I've never thought of it, like she loves me, but there's more that she'd rather bedoing than staying with me, kind of? But at the same time she wants be, that's a ittle bit selfish, but it's a possibility.
Right now, I have to focus on my self, I'm looking for a place to go swimming a couple of days at least, but all ar far away, I'll start doing push ups or something like that, good idea.
For my sake, I don't think I'll break up yet, I'm really afraid of myself right now, so I guess that the "comfort zone", is my best choice right now?

Are you in love with the time accumulated, the person or pain?

That's fucking deep man, I guess I'm in love with what we used to be, and the idea of going back to that

Swimming and pushups is exactly how I started, bro. Eat right and go from there and you'll feel a hell of a lot better

Thank you man, from the bottom of my heart, thanks. I whish the best for you

You too user, and trust I can't imagine how I'd be feeling if this was me and my girl in this situation. It must be extremely painful, but it sounds like you're a big guy

I don't want anyone to feel like this. But worst things happen out there, and I know I'll do better some day. Cheers man

Lmao you need mature real znswers? Why post on the asshole of the internet faggot??

First off dont try to handle two things at once your brain obviously cant do it. A relationship znd studying is just too much for you. Youre ganna fail at one and edu is a better priority then pussy.

Well most of the guys that replied actually gave me a really good answer and helped a lot.
Ant you're aboslutely righ about uni and a relationship, and I'm well aware of which of those is more important. I'm just trying my best at both and I'm obviously not good at that.