Door was just kicked in your only weapon is to your immediate left. How fucked are you?

Door was just kicked in your only weapon is to your immediate left. How fucked are you?

wall.

n i c e

it's a giant ass painting. Ill smack it over his head i guess

swiss army knife i forgot i left there.
kek.

window
I just walk out of it

My skate tool :')

Not at all, nice snub next to me right now, I wish a bitch would, tbh hoping on it, I'v been feeling like killing somebody might help with my low self esteem lately, idk why

water bottle... gg

Bulgarian SLR AK. I think I'm good.

Huge fucking beer mug, definitely would do damage if smacked against someone

An otomatone. Would hardly do any damage.

I had part of a fucking coat rack next to my bed for a long time
Only had to use it once

This fucking drug fucking addict bitch kept ringing the building's door
I went to the door drunk half naked with the fucking stick in my hand and told him if he rung that god damned door one more time I'd come down there and shove it up his ass

A lamp, a desk, and a jolly rancher wrapper. Eh, okaay.

headset :^)

crappy epiphone with a broken neck

i got a throwing knife that i use to pick the junk from my toe nails, so *Disgusting Throwing Knife* with +1 poison damage

A sock, a blanket, or a container of cd's...

my front door is a metal security door that opens outwards.

aint nobody kicking that shit in.

Vodka
>Drink then throw empty I guess

MCAT books and a calculator. At least the books are heavy

a 30 pound dumbell and my bong

my beagle will bark at them then bring them a ball.

budgie
alright

Guess I'm using an entire goddamn bookshelf to bash the guy's head in

A pencil. I hope there's three men.

Nothing but a big butcher knife that I cut my bread with I'v been wondering how it would cut through human flesh too , I live in Romania no guns over here.

Bwhahah, which one, axe, knife, bat, or my bokken...

Any way that goes someone is at best getting an ambulance ride, and at worst I gotta file paperwork all night cause some idiot kicked in my door and I killed his ass.

A box of wine...

Not at all

Such a shit movie

>a tumbler of strong margarita

Surprisingly dangerous.

You cut bread with a butcher knife? kek

Sig sauer p226, left hand currently resting on it under my pillow...im good

Threat resolved. Winning

I guess I'm blinding them with dip spit, that shit burns like hell when it gets in your eyes.

Yeah when I'm in a good mood , I usually rip it with my hands.

well I got a toilet roll, maybe I'll unroll and hide in the stack of toilet papers

I'll give him my coat, but there's strings attached.

Pic very related... Think I'll do just fine

My left hand, I'm a lefty. I'll turn blood rage angry and hurl everything that I can

Why would they do that bro? would they help me find something that I'v been searching for so long? why would they want my poverty?

Ok, he can have it. Felt like burning it, though.

A cel phone charger that looks like a pokeball.
It's moderately heavy, so I'll chuck it with all my might and hope it stalls him long enough for me to book it out of there

o ya

Are you a downy?

scissors. I'll take my chances.

Uhm....stab i guess?

>looks left
>Pic related

Kimber Ultra II Crimson Carry. .45 cal. Fellow has one small red dot on his forehead, followed in a nano-second with a large hole. Cops come by, take statement, shake hand and tell me to have a good evening.

5 month old baby. He will be protected with all my might

Screwed a pillow....

Think I'm good..

>no ammo
>still can be used as baseball bat

why do you have that sitting next to you? are you black or middle eastern?

stick the pointy end in his pee hole

Coffee mug

Half-sharpened axe


Well shit...

Im good

lol, full 30 and white as snow..

A handheld fox plushie. GG world.

A Winnie the Pooh body pillow, not fucking joking.

you didnt answer my first question. you scared of something in your own home? maybe you should move?

Could be worse

>Draw your sword

A towel I use to clean my white guilt

Look at this fucking faggot who thinks that killing someone is going to relieve their mental illness.

Put your gun in a fucking safe and reach out to a therapist before you become another fucking statistic.

A guitar

A fucking couch. How do i use it as a weapon?

must be in the UK

Occasional trouble. I move for no one.

My vibrator . im fuked literally

Naw I'm amerifat, need that for work

Frank is that you?

HK45C under the pillow with Hornady Zombie Defence.

My vector calculus notes in a Hannah Montana binder. I'll bore him to death.

Okay then. Carry on.

not even your own safety and mental health? you sound fucking paranoid. I dont even lock my door and i live in america.

Bong, better make the one bit count

125+ lb male blue great dane that does not like any human but me. He is currently sleeping, and I pity any guest I did not invite into our home.

lol its only 125 pounds? you gotta feed that thing, moran.

Safest house on the block. Preparedness =/= Paranoia. And no offense, but not locking your doors makes you the odd man out here.

Paper clips. I'd say I'm pretty fuckin' ready

he isnt even 2 yet

I gotta fuckin green spray bottle with water in it.

10foot long dildo I guess I need to start practicing my whip skillz

Guess I am gouging eyes out with car keys, giving paper cuts with bills I'm not going to pay and shoving my girls wallet up his ass. Then finally smothering with a pillow... Maybe some assrape of the dead body.

Got a pen without ink, I'll stab it in his throat

Some badass flip flops

A tree. Am in the park. Intruders to bring their own doors.

:(

Great Dane. I think I'm fine.

I don't think my front door is even locked, but on the off chance anyone could make it to me, razor sharp combat knife. I doubt anyone's getting past the pit in the living room who loves me almost as much as lunch though.

Well I guess I could find use of a vacume

not here. it makes you nothing, because nobody is going to know, because i live somewhere safe that you dont need a gun to defend yourself from home invasions.

being the safest house on the block doesnt mean shit if there arent any threats.

maschine drum pad... it's actually quite hard

There's just a black 3ds on my left
Guess I can make them play really shitty games and the robbers will die of boredom

i have 3 dogos danes

Best fucking bread ever. So loyal and protective. Only breed I'll ever own.

>needing a weapon

i think pumpernickle is better tbh