HEY AUSTRALIA

*Blocks your path*

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youtube.com/watch?v=N96QZ8ewm_c
news.nationalgeographic.com/2015/05/150518-spiders-australia-silk-webs-animals-environment/
youtube.com/watch?v=nWSIYlIag6w
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australians tell me that when their house is really quiet at night, they can hear a huntsman's footsteps across the walls

Syrians tell me that when their shack is really quiet at night, they can hear a tomahawk screech through the sky.

Iraqis tell me when their house is really cold at night they can hear soldiers' footsteps across the walls

Russians tell me when their house is really quiet at night, they can hear faggots fucking across the hall.

It's just a huntsman mate
Leave it alone and it'll eat smaller pests around your house and generally keep things in order
It's like a cat, only with eight legs

...

>It's like a cat, only with eight legs
>cat
>eight legs

I can confirm this

>t. spider
You're not fooling anyone

>t. professional australian

*Blocks your path*

Look what kitty caught!

What the fugggggg

>meow!

If also eats roaches in industrial volumes, sent 10 to my home, please.

>mfw got one over my bed right now

haha it's so proud of itself

*Catches with container*

Huntsman's are pretty harmless, I got bitten by one the other week and all I got was two itchy bumps. They kill flies so they're alright.
Redbacks, Funnel Webs and White Tips are the more dangerous spiders.

*moves around stressfully*

I love how noone in Australia gives two squirts of piss how dangerous its wildlife is.

Keep on keepin on straya

The capture of insanely dangerous wildlife in inappropriate food containers is basically the childhood of real Australians.

Spiders are nature's nurturers. Why would anyone be afraid of such kind, little critters?

I caught a red back when I was visiting, are you proud of me?

Wanna trade aussie m8s?
>spider fight who would win?

Asu spiders are cute.
CUTE!

I caught a Brazilian Wandering Spider in a 5 star hotel in São Paulo. Get on my level.

>It's like a cat, only with eight legs

huntsman eats cockroach
daddy long legs eats huntsman

it all works out

Mfw even Kangaroos won't touch that

pls dont

I used to love that as a kid until I got stung by bees to many times and bitten by to many spiders.

fugg

my cat nearly got bitten by a red back the other day

This is my nightmare

based Australian spiders doing god's work and helping humanity

Dubs of truth

More dubs of truth

>wearing closed shoes
That's ya first mistake

These fuckers really will block your path. They're annoying little bastards.

>tfw was walking near a large pond thing when i was like 4 and a goose mother started screeching at me and chased me

literal terrorists

FFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!

What does an Australian think about these?

>Brazilian Wandering Spider
Those assholes are dangerous
They literally jump attack you

Yes, but bonus points if you take it to school for show and tell, teachers love that shit
I've had two run-ins with Hadronyche formidabilis and both times I actually mistook it for another species, once when on a picnic and it snuck in for a look. Bagged him in tupperware and took it to a specialist who identified it as a male the Northern Tree funnelweb. They're about as large as a Sydney funnelweb +50% and about roughly twice as toxic. Second time was on manoeuvres and came across one that was so damn big I didn't know what it was, she ended up living in a food container for some time until we got back to civilisation to be ID'd, until then I didn't have to tell my platoon to check their boots and sleeping bags :)

They're not exactly endearing as they're extremely aggressive, very large (around 15cm) with venom capable of killing large dogs and people
I've had one run in with one, it ended badly for both of us

Oh hadn't know that there'd be some in Oz, but I should've known then again seeing as they reside in French Polynesia too.

The ones in France never exceed 10-12 centimeters, but that only makes it tougher to spy them out. So I'm assuming that one stung you?

Ours can't kill that I would know of, but the venom's on par with hornets might provoke.

was walking to primary school one day, one of these cunts crawled out of a light post, really scared me.

I used to hate them but I think they're kind of cool now. Get them in my house on occasion. Sometimes I go for a walk in the mostly-empty land near around my area and look at insects/plants/views/etc, find lots of these curled up under rocks.

why, wouldn't it make sense that you can squash the bug with closed shoes, meanwhile with open ones he'd bite you ?

>I used to hate them but I think they're kind of cool now.
They definitely aren't though. The way in which they jitter their bodies while crawling across walls really screws with them, and I can't ever sleep in my parent's house (who live in the South) without inspecting room for them each evening.

Only dumb luck it didn't sting, scared the crap out of me though
They're dangerously poisonous but some people also get an allergic reaction to them, others just get a dry-bite and a tiny amount or no venom so its no worse than a bee sting

These little cunts kill people a lot, our bull ants are sort of at that weird part of the evolutionary tree divergence between wasps and ants. Very ancient species.
So they've got all the mass of a big ant (20-30mm long) with the furious nest defence aggression of a hornet or angry wasp and can jump about 60-100cm

>can jump about 60-100cm
Oh Lord. Can't believe that I survived living two years out in your country as a babe.

People go on about the spiders, jellyfish and other shit being dangerous, but the bull ant (aka- bulldog ant, jumping jack) actually manages to put people in the ground fairly regularly

They're fucking arseholes too, they see really well and then jump on you from afar if you get too close to their nest. Then beat on you like you owe them money.

Just checking this gif

it's actually not very likely to die to a deadly creature even in australia

...

t. huntsman

>can jump

>mfw haven't seen a huntsman for several years
They creep me the fuck out, But they're always fascinating

>fascinating
I would use another word

if you live in western australia you don't have to deal with any of this shit

pic related is the natural wildlife.

one of my mates refuses to kill insects and just puts them in one of these then lets them out

he's a rural bogan too

wtf im scared of australia now

yeah fuck these cunts, got bitten by one as a kid

had a few run ins with scorpions too, disgusting fuckers

I also used to get frogs coming into my house through the plumbing from the toilet

fuck living in the bush

yeah but you have to live with sandgropers

wtf is that?

I used to love the green tree frogs as a kid, so mellow and cool, hanging out in the shower eating bugs

disgusting little fucks you find living in the sand in WA

we call Western Australians sandgropers after them since there is literally no soil in that part of the country and everything is built off sand

oh o-ok....

>the screams they make when a green tree snake gets them
yeesh

frogs make me feel a bit sick Tbh

ever put a cane toad in a shopping bag and smash it against a tree?

heh, for a while I was running a sanctuary for rare pepes in my bedroom aquarium that where being persecuted by snek.
Mum wasn't impressed

not from Queensland sorry

I knew one bloke who used to chuck them in a box and dump them over the NSW border though kek

legend

youtube.com/watch?v=N96QZ8ewm_c

i thought western australia had all the worst wildlife

kek

does it really rain spiders in australia?

sharks are really the only thing you need to worry about

there's the taipan snake (I think it's the deadliest snake in the world or some shit) but that's only up north and fucking no one lives past Perth

news.nationalgeographic.com/2015/05/150518-spiders-australia-silk-webs-animals-environment/

>shit everywhere
>aggressive/warlike
>act like they own the parks
>breed like crazy
>can't even eat them, meat is low-quality
My city is overrun with these things. Why even live?

100% behind this, fuck mice.

...

it's the same with seagulls where I live

I worked in china for a few months though and they have a massive festival dedicated to them. Apparently they get them for a month or so and think they're the most incredible birds they'd ever seen. Genuinely bizarre

>literal Ewoks
Based.

>tfw too poor for plastic containers
>had to make do with shopping bags

>be in Hong Kong for holiday
>go to the jungle right next to the 30+ floor flat block
>see this


It may not look big but it could envelop my face like that facehugger from Alien.

youtube.com/watch?v=nWSIYlIag6w

whip spiders aren't cute

CUTE

they have no venomous fangs and rarely bite, and are harmless to humans. look at its cute arms trying to grab his fingers :3

C-cute.