Ask a depressed Schizophrenic anything. I may take a while to reply sometimes, be patient!

Ask a depressed Schizophrenic anything. I may take a while to reply sometimes, be patient!

Free (you)s for all posters!

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bermp

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How's your day going friend?

Not bad, very boring though.

What do you do on your spare time?

I'm watching The Walking Dead right now.
But I usually play videogames, or browse Sup Forums. Not much else.

>watching The Walking Dead
you're not depressed you fucking parasite, just off yourself and give me back my tax money you lazy piece of shit

what disorder is that? what does it entail?

>you're not depressed you fucking parasite
You say that like it was my choice to be like this.
>just off yourself
Nah, I don't fee like it.
>give me back my tax money you lazy piece of shit
Assuming you're probably around 25 or so. Come find me and I'll give you your dollar back.
>what disorder is that?
Schizophrenia
>what does it entail?
Copy pasta'd because lazy
a long-term mental disorder of a type involving a breakdown in the relation between thought, emotion, and behavior, leading to faulty perception, inappropriate actions and feelings, withdrawal from reality and personal relationships into fantasy and delusion, and a sense of mental fragmentation.

What's it like having it? Are you aware of your symptoms? Ever gotten psychosis?

>What's it like having it?
I have a metaphor to explain:
It's like you've been run over, and you're trapped under a bus, But you're also the driver of the bus. Everything is in your own head, but you're stuck there. You have the power to just move the bus, but you can't.

>Are you aware of your symptoms?
Sometimes I am, sometimes I'm not. There are times when I can't tell if what I'm seeing or head is real or not.

>Ever gotten psychosis?
I get episodes every few months or so. They usually last for about a week. They can range from severe to mild.

...

Do you isolate yourself? Do you have many friends? If so, are they understanding of your condition?
Apologies, I have a lot of questions. I have a morbid fascination with psychosis and for lack of a better word, madness.

>Do you isolate yourself?
Very much so, the only time I leave the house is to go shopping.
>Do you have many friends?
No, I have a group of about 3 friends, whom I do not see anymore.
>If so, are they understanding of your condition?
Only one of my friends even knows about it.
>Apologies, I have a lot of questions
No worries, friend.
>I have a morbid fascination with psychosis and for lack of a better word, madness.
It's really fascinating, I have to agree with you there. I've always had a fondness of the mad as well. Having dealt with it myself has only made me more fond of it. Though, I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Do you ever feel lonely? Got any family around? What made you decide to distance yourself from those friends?

>Do you ever feel lonely?
Occasionally, usually only for a brief moment though.
>Got any family around?
I do, but I rarely see any of them either.
>What made you decide to distance yourself from those friends?
I wish I knew.

If you had three wishes... What would those be ?

Have you gotten help for your condition, i.e. therapy, medication, motivation exercises? How do you afford to live? How old are you?

How do you pay for shit

>If you had three wishes... What would those be ?
To be with her
To make her happy
And probably to have enough money to not have to worry about anything.
>Have you gotten help for your condition, i.e. therapy, medication, motivation exercises?
No, I don't want to take medicine, and therapy won't tell me anything I already don't know.
>How do you afford to live?
SSI, not because of the Schizo though. I have Spina Bifida as well.
>How old are you?
Just turned 25 last month.
See above

do you think its gay to fap to milo stewarts ass?

Isn't Milo a chick?
[spoiler]if not then it's gay[/spoiler]

have you ever thought about beheading a girl?

Those three wishes... the pictures you use to illustrate your posts... Hm... bittersweet nostalgia.

I'm wondering.
Why wouldn't you wish for your own well-being ?
Is there a part of you that thinks that you deserve that condition ? Or that wishing it away would be selfish ?

How's your sex life? Still a virgin? When did you first notice your schizophrenia symptoms? How severe is your spina bifida?

>have you ever thought about beheading a girl?
I prefer blunt force trauma. Hitting someone in the head with something large and heavy. Not enough force to kill them at first, just enough to daze them and for the panic to set in.
mmm..
>Why wouldn't you wish for your own well-being ?
To make her happy would make me far happier than anything else.
>Is there a part of you that thinks that you deserve that condition ?
I wouldn't have it if I didn't deserve it, would I?
>Or that wishing it away would be selfish ?
If I were to wish it away, would I even be me at the end of it? Probably not.
>How's your sex life? Still a virgin?
Yup, still a virgin.
>When did you first notice your schizophrenia symptoms?
When I was about 21.
>How severe is your spina bifida?
It's not super severe, but it's pretty bad and probably getting worse. My feet are paralyzed, I am able to walk but it gets very painful, very fast.

why not make cums with hooker?

To what end?

How do you feel when you take anti-psychotics?

I don't take anti-psychotics. I've talked to a few Schizos that have taken them though. From what they said it's like being hollow.

Did you have any symptoms of other mental illnesses before experiencing symptoms of schizophrenia?

I've been told I have traits of Antisocial Personality Disorder. But that's not really a mental illness.
Other than that, no.

But... does she know about your desire to bring her happiness ? Would she also wish for you to be happy ?

I'm convinced that you'd be the same if you wished it away. You'd be even more of you; as in "less fragmented".

And no. You didn't deserve it.

who are you quoting?

Lets assume you get a job, would you tell people that you have schizophrenia? What if they said that you are "weird"?
Have you told your special one yet and how did she react?

Have you ever taken any drugs? If yes, which drugs were they and how did they make you feel. If no, would you consider taking drugs in the future?

love your threads OP. I've always wondered how is your physic. Are you overweight, do you exercise, do you eat healthy etc?

>But... does she know about your desire to bring her happiness ?
I tell her all the time.
>Would she also wish for you to be happy ?
Yes
>I'm convinced that you'd be the same if you wished it away.
I don't think so. It's something you can't understand without experiencing it. I am who I am because of my disabilities, they are the foundation of me. If I remove them, who am I? Not the same person, that's who.
>And no. You didn't deserve it.
How can you say that with such confidence?
>would you tell people that you have schizophrenia?
Probably not.
>What if they said that you are "weird"?
That's not uncommon, I am weird. People say I'm weird all the time.
>Have you told your special one yet and how did she react?
She knew before we started dating. She was perfectly fine with it, she also has a history of mental health issues.
>Have you ever taken any drugs?
Yes.
>which drugs were they and how did they make you feel
I've tried Weed, Tobacco, and Coke.
>weed
My favorite drug of all, honestly. It makes everything better. It makes me feel crazier, and less crazy at the same time. Hard to explain.
>Tobacco
Hate it, feels like shit, tastes like shit.
>Coke
Fast, very fast.
>would you consider taking drugs in the future?
I want to try more hard drugs, like LSD or shrooms. But, I'd never do any amphetamines or anything like that.
>Are you overweight
No, I'm 115LB and 5"6'
>do you exercise
very seldom.
>do you eat healthy
Kinda kinda

Do you use any drugs to help you through the day? Also, could you share some hallucinations and/or delusions with us? I understand if you'd rather not. Have a good day or night or whatever

Do you remember things clearly when it comes to your psychosis? I.e. your decisions, what you saw/experienced. Do you mind recounting one of those experiences for us?

>Do you use any drugs to help you through the day?
When I have the spare dosh I indulge in a marijuana.
> Also, could you share some hallucinations and/or delusions with us?
My more common hallucinations are of a tall extremely dark black figure, "he" wears a coat similar to a trench coat, with long baggy sleeves.
I see floating lights, though they're very rare these days.
I also see disembodied heads, usually in windows.
The delusion that I am most aware of is that I am from another universe. (this is the 3rd one that I've been to)
>Have a good day or night or whatever
You too, user.
>Do you remember things clearly when it comes to your psychosis?
Not really, I can remember small details of it. But most of the time it's just a big blur. Time feels really fast when I'm psychotic, in one second it's like 3 seconds pass.

Do you experience music normally?
Did you ever experience synesthesia, or a slowing down/speeding up of music?

Can your voices answer all of the questions you ask them logically and to your satisfaction?

eat your own fingers hands or feeds your election

Have you ever tried self-awareness exercises? That is to say do you ever ask yourself "why is this happening?" Or "why am i thinking x thought?"?
Where have you met these other schizophrenia sufferers? Were they worse than you or did you feel a kinship with them?

How does the sickness impair your day-to-day life? What would you say can you do worse than a heatlhy person? Can you do something better than a normal person?

>Do you experience music normally?
It's normal to me, but I don't know if my normal is the same as your normal. Does that make sense?
>Did you ever experience synesthesia
I experience it with emotions, specifically other people's emotions.
If someone is experiencing a strong emotion around me they get this colorful aura around them and it lets me see what emotion they're feeling.
>or a slowing down/speeding up of music?
Not that I'm aware of.
>Can your voices answer all of the questions you ask them logically and to your satisfaction?
They can pretty much always answer them, but not always to my satisfaction. Often they will lead me down a path of dread if I ask them the wrong questions. They always apply ruthless logic though.
>eat your own fingers hands or feeds your election
What, why?
>Have you ever tried self-awareness exercises? That is to say do you ever ask yourself "why is this happening?"
I have, they usually don't lead anywhere though. Even if I'm aware of why I may be thinking a paranoid thought, I'm still unable to break the loop. Often being aware that it's just a paranoid thought will make it even worse.
>Where have you met these other schizophrenia sufferers?
I met one Schizophrenic at a party, we were at a friends "house" (he lived in a garage) and a Schizophrenic guy lived behind his garage in a shed. The guy came in and was talking to the host. We made eye contact and immediately I knew something was up with him and then he came over to me and said "you look like an interesting person" and talked to me for about 45 minutes about total nonsense. He had a pyramid scheme to make a load of money by asking people online to mail him a penny so he would make a castle, then he'd make a castle of pennies with a 3d model and keep the pennies and be rich.
There's also a homeless Schizophrenic that "lives" around here that I talk to when I see him walking around.

Can you understand your fellow schizobros? Or is just absolutely bobbledygook to you as well?

>Cont
>Where have you met these other schizophrenia sufferers?
A friend of mine also has a Schizophrenic cousin who is also homeless I've met a few times.
>Were they worse than you or did you feel a kinship with them?
They were worse than me, but every Schizo I've ever met we've always clicked.
>How does the sickness impair your day-to-day life?
That's a difficult question to answer, as my day to day life doesn't really exist.
>What would you say can you do worse than a heatlhy person?
Well, I can't really function in society, and I can't keep any sort of routine.
>Can you do something better than a normal person?
I've been told more than once that I'm robotic in how I look at the world. It's almost pure logic with no emotion.
I am also able to read people's emotions, and get a general idea of what they're thinking about.
>Can you understand your fellow schizobros?
I can understand the logic they're using, or how they came to a conclusion. But it's still total nonsense.

What do your voices talk to you about? Do you talk back or just think of a response when you communicate with them?

DON'T TELL THEM

How do the episodes affect you?
What do the episodes feel like?
What's your opinion on other schizophrenics?

no !

DON'T SAY IT OR SHE DIES

Show your feminin dick

STOP

>What do your voices talk to you about?
They don't talk about anything by themselves. If they talk it's just like a white noise, or like a ringing, or a far off whisper that can't hear.
>What do the episodes feel like?
Like a dream.
>What's your opinion on other schizophrenics?
They're pretty neat to hang around, I like hearing their take on things. Being able to analyze their minds is fun.
What are you on about, user?
That's lewd user.

What kind of music do you like? Do you feel a connection to music? Does it calm you down or exacerbate it?

do you ever use Sup Forums?

Let me tell you this straight buddy...

My SO has the same disorder as you do. I knew her from before the start of her treatment. We have been together for ~2 years by now. If she never had started her treatment, and admitted to herself that she had this kind of illness, then she would NEVER had gotten any better. She has a life now, and she is doing better for each upcomming day, and Im so fucking proud of her. She wasn't happy about pills in the beginning. But she is taking only a small dose against "Thought Rambling"...

She has been on other meds, but this thing has helped the most!

Treatment really SAVED her life. And I hope you would save up some courage and do the same as she did!

There is hope out there user, I know it can be tough tho!

user that is incredible
Did you have any foreshadowing events in your life before you knew you were schizophrenic that suggested you weren't "normal"
If so what would you say they were

What is your theory on schizophrenics
Most assume its trauma but what is your theory

Imo you seem like a chill person
How would you describe this dream?

The answer to your question is the same answer to the question "are you retarded?"

Im the guy with the SO...

Also, are you sure you dont just THINK that you can read peoples emotions? Just a hint. To help out a brother.

...

depressed
schizophrenic
r u also autistic, obsessive-compulsive, bipolar and demented?

Actually, Depressed and Schizophrenic are two mental disorders which actually often co-exists...

How would you feel if you couldn't tell reality from dreaming?

Correction... Depression* :p

>What kind of music do you like?
I listen to just about all music, my favorite genre is electronic specifically without any vocals.
>Do you feel a connection to music?
Very much so.
>Does it calm you down or exacerbate it?
It can do both, depending on the mood I am in, and what I am listening to.
>do you ever use Sup Forums?
I would never. Also see: It's good to hear she was able to overcome it.
>There is hope out there user
That's what everyone keeps saying.
>Did you have any foreshadowing events
I've always been kind of off, I was a social recluse as a kid. Never had many friends, I had hallucinations that were much more vivid and often suffered (to this day) from social anxieties.
>What is your theory on schizophrenics
I don't think it's related to trauma at all, I don't really have a theory on though. I'll think about it, and come back to this if I come up with anything.
>How would you describe this dream?
It just feels like I'm asleep, like everything isn't real. Everything that's real feels fake, and everything fake feels real.

NO

So you can't communicate with the voices?

i think i wouldnt be able to worry, since all would seem real anyway.

She hasn't "overcome it" - yet. But she is on her way.

But I really hope that my story can help you out a bit. I have witnessed some terrible nights and episodes. I just wanna be there for her. I KNOW it can be really rough. But I really do advice you to seek help, cause it WILL improve your quallity of life.

I haven't replied to any of your previous threads, cause it's often hard for a person with this disorder to take that first step. And you probably wont just because I write it for you.

I dunno, I just really felt like I wanted to try and help out a stranger tonight.

This will be my last try

Do u have hallucinations? And if so of what?

>Also, are you sure you dont just THINK that you can read peoples emotions?
No, I'm 100% positive I can, I've had actual accounts of it happening with complete accuracy.
Such as being the only person in a room noticing a friend having a panic attack. It's something I'm completely positive of.
Nope, just Schizophrenic and depressed.
Yes?
No, I can. But if they're just talking idly I can't understand it.

And experiencing this; THAT is really scarry...

>daily reminder
Every mentally ill person should be put down like a dog, waste of space and waste of resources, do us all a favor and kill yourself, or let some nigger do it for you

This is reading emotions, not thoughts.

This is something Im really good at as well
- Guy with SO

Find a door out please

How do you speak to them?

Why are you depressed?

Can you tell me more about these occurrences?
I find it fascinating

Its my daily duty to find people who are mentally ill and manipulate them into suicide, i get paid to do it also
>thinks medical professionals actually wanna deal with retards

See: Apart from medicine, which violates my very morals, there isn't much that can be done for me. Unfortunately.
Thanks for trying though.
All of humanity should be put down, they're nothing but a parasite on this planet.
>This is reading emotions, not thoughts.
Yes, reading emotions is what I am able to do best. I can only get an idea of what people are thinking. But I can see their emotions clearly.
What do you mean?

You're looking at it all wrong user.

We need to send them to an island and do studies on them. How well they work together. We have to see what advantages they might have or do have etc.

and this planet is nothing but a giant resource mine, as are all other planets containing useful resources, get over yourself, a planet is nothing but a floating rock

what anime is this from OP?

>666
satan confirms it, thank you

Thanx and do u feel comfort? Fear? Anger? uncumfortable? Do they fade away? Do you fight them away? I hear screams voices of ppl discussin stupid shit in my transition between awake to asleep do u have this too? Did u have a messiah complex? I had it for some time.. oh and btw ure not alone anymore

Bakemonogatari

I remember last year, it was around March if I'm not wrong, was getting a tarot reading from Reimu's around here, Void card, not much to tell basically just said that nothing was going to happen, maybe things would've turned out slightly worse; Came up asking things about myself then, about my not being able to bring emotions along with me through sleep, waking up mostly empty everyday as if being a little different each morning, and so he told me about schizophrenia and advised to maybe get checked out.
But I don't know anything about things like this, I have my little knowledge about psychoanalysis but that's all and it's a total different thing.
I don't know why but every now and then I still get paranoid over this.

Also saving all these logs, I love to read things like this..

I don't know, user.
>Can you tell me more about these occurrences?
I assume you mean reading people's emotions?
There was one time at a party at a friends house (in their garage too, that's where everyone parties around here).
There was a group of people that I had never met that were friends of a friend's friend. There was this one girl in their group, she was wearing a red shirt, kinda emo style reddish blonde hair. When they came in she was the first thing I noticed, I could feel her anxiety and she had a greenish aura about her. I never interacted with her, I just watched her from the other side of the room, everything she did just screamed that she was having an anxiety attack. The way she moved, the way she held her arms.
>and this planet is nothing but a giant resource mine
That's looking at it from the perspective of humans. Quit being so bias.
You're nothing but a resource mine, everything is a resource mine.
>a planet is nothing but a floating rock
And a human is nothing more than a bunch atoms stuck together, what's your point?

have a therapy

Interesting, I as asking because i was curious if there was a reason behind it or not. Though I have Chronic Depression and as a result I'm often Depressed with little reason to be.

You clearly cant see how the circle of life works, we all consume something to create something, as sentient beings a planet is our food source, we consume it and move on to next, there are near endless amount of planets in an universe and more are being crated, stop treating it like its something special

but as long as we have people like you holding us back from unlocking our true potential, we'll be stuck on this planet with mentally challanged people.

>Thanx
You're welcome.
>do u feel comfort? Fear? Anger? uncumfortable?
All of my emotions fall under the umbrella of "anxiety". But I do feel those emotions, just through the catalyst of anxiety.
>Do they fade away?
Eventually
>Do you fight them away?
No, that's pointless to do, it never works.
>I hear screams voices of ppl discussin stupid shit in my transition between awake to asleep do u have this too?
I hear random sounds when I'm falling asleep, and waking up, yes. Sometimes I'll hear birds chirping in my ears, or people talking, or my phone ringing.

If you're worried about it, you should get yourself checked out.
>Also saving all these logs, I love to read things like this..
Glad you enjoy it.
>have a therapy
Thanks?
I think it's fairly common in people with depression to not know why they're depressed, or even to be depressed without a "reason" perse

r u having a therapy?

i hate it when anime characters open their mouths instantly after taking a bite out of something. like really did you swallow it that fast, cunt?

>You clearly cant see how the circle of life works
I'm more than aware of how it works.

Get your head out of your ass user.
nope
It's sped up, but I eat that fast fairly often..

not on a therapy? Wonder why r u a depressed schizo